13

13

Bethany's POV.

The first thing I noticed when I woke up was the cold air against my skin. The second was the steady rise and fall of breathing beside me. Panic shot through me before my eyes even opened.

No.

Oh God, Please, no.

I blinked, the dim morning light creeping through the curtains casting a dull glow over the unfamiliar room.

And then I saw him, Adrian, lying on his back, one arm thrown carelessly over his head, the other stretched out where I had been. Memories crashed into me with brutal clarity.

I could see everything clearly. The way his mouth were on mine. His hands gripping my waist. The way we moved together, desperate and reckless without any care in the world.

Oh my God. I sat up too fast, the sheets tangling around my legs. My head spun lightly, a dull ache blooming behind my eyes.

What did I do?

I looked down, saw the marks on my skin—red, fading, but there. His fingerprints. His mouth. Oh God. I could barely breath. I needed to get out of here. Now.

Moving carefully, I slipped out of the bed, wincing when the floor creaked beneath my bare feet. Adrian didn't stir though. Good. My clothes. Where were my clothes?

Looking around, I spotted my dress crumpled on the floor, my heels kicked near the doorway. I grabbed the dress and pulled it over my head, not bothering to check if I was wearing it in the right manner. My purse…God, did I even have it? I scanned the room with frantic eyes and found it slumped near the nightstand. Every second felt too long as I tiptoed to the door, slowly turning the handle and praying it wouldn't squeak. My stomach was still clenching from all the delicious orgasm Adrian had given me yesterday but right now wasn't the time to think about it. It was a one time thing and I was certain we wouldn't see each other again.

The door eased open with a soft click and I slipped out, moving through the hall as quietly as possible. I looked around, trying my possible best to find my way but that was practically impossible.

I didn't know where I was exactly—some kind of safehouse, Adrian had said—but I found the front door after a few turns. I didn't stop to think, neither did I look back.

I stepped into the cold morning air and started walking as fast as I could, hoping I'd find a cab around.

***

The city was slowly waking up, people moving in their own little worlds while I tried to calm the storm raging inside of me. I kept my head down, hugging my arms around myself as I walked aimlessly. God. What had I done? How could I had let that happen? How could I have slept with a total stranger? The drug wasn't an excuse, I knew what exactly I was doing when I made that decision, but —

I shook my head and squeezed my eyes shut, biting down hard on the inside of my cheek until I tasted blood.

I wasn't that kind of person. I don't cheat.

But Mason did, a voice inside of me reminded me and I shook my head hard.

That didn't justify it.

Did it?

No. It didn't.

I felt sick. I felt no different from Mason right now. I could have at least waited to officially break off the engagement and return his damned ring before I went ahead to sleep with someone else.

I needed to go home. I needed to shower, to scrub every inch of last night off my skin. But more than that, I needed to talk to my mother.

I couldn't keep this from her. She needed to know that Mason and I had broken up, that he cheated on me and I told him that I was done with him.

***

The house was quiet when I let myself in. Mom was probably in the kitchen, starting breakfast, or worried sick about me since I didn't inform her that I wouldn't be back last night.

I moved like a ghost through the halls, heading straight to my room as fast as I could.

The moment I got in, I locked the door behind me and collapsed onto the bed, breathing hard and heavily.

Tears stung my eyes, but I blinked them away.

I didn't deserve to cry just because of a piece of shit like Mason. I didn't deserve to cry just because I'd chosen myself and chosen to be happy even if it was just for a little moment.

I stared at the ceiling, my mind spiraling. Adrian hadn't forced me. I had wanted it. I had kissed him first. And he didn't stop me. But the worst part? It hadn't felt like a mistake last night. It had felt right, and that was what scared me the most.

A soft knock at the door startled me for a moment and then I sighed. I already knew who it could be. I mean, it could only be one person.

"Bethany?" Mom's voice was gentle. "Are you home?"

I swallowed hard, forcing my voice to work. "Yeah. I'm here," I murmured after a few minutes of silence.

There was a pause, and then she asked, "Can I come in?"

No, I wanted to say, but again I needed to tell her that Mason and I were no longer together so why just prolong the inevitable?

"Yes," I replied, turning around on the bed and wiping the few drops of tears that had managed to drop.

The door opened slowly, and Mom stepped in, her face lined with concern. "You didn't come home last night." She closed the door behind her before sitting on the edge of her bed.

I couldn't meet her eyes, afraid that she'd see all the guilt and shame swimming around in mine.

"I know. I'm sorry," I replied, my voice a bit muffled by the pillow. I felt her move closer to me.

"Is everything okay?" She asked, the concern obvious in her voice.

No.

"Yes," I lied, raising my head and finally turning to her.

Her brow furrowed. "Bethany…"

"I'm ending things with Mason." The words slipped out before I could stop them.

Mom's eyes widened, but she didn't speak right away. She just stared at me for a few moments, blinking at me with shocked. When she was probably calm enough, she asked.

"Sweetheart, what happened?"

I let out a shaky breath. "I caught him cheating. With… some woman," I replied with a tired sigh, feeling too exhausted even to think of it.

Mom's face tightened. "Oh, Bethany…" she began and then trialed off with a sigh, shaking her head.

"I should've left him right then, but I didn't. I mean, I told him I was done with him, but-" I raised my hand and showed her the ring still sitting on my finger. "I—" My voice broke, and I swallowed hard. "I can't marry him. I won't."

Mom reached out, taking my hand in hers and squeezing assuringly.

"I'm so sorry, baby. You don't deserve that," she said and shook her head. "I don't- " she began and then sighed, shaking her head again. "I didnt expect that from him. Oh God."

"I'm so sorry, Mom. I know you've been anticipating the wedding and you've pt too much into it and now I'm breaking things off and wasting your effort and—"

"Oh please don't say that," she answered, shaking her head and squeezing my yand again. "I don't care how much I've put into your wedding arrangements. I will not let you get married to a cheat, sweetie. You made the right decision," she assured me.

I sighed, nodding my head and wiping the tears from my eyes.

"There's more," I whispered, remembering about Adrian.

Her grip on my hand tightened. "What is it?"

I hesitated, the words clawing at my throat. I couldn't tell her.

How could I look my mother in the eye and say I slept with another man without oroperly breaking off the engagement first?

"I just… I need to move on. That's all," I lied, deflecting with a sigh. Mom studied me for a moment, but she didn't press.

"Okay. Whatever you need, I'm here." A tear slipped down my cheek, and she brushed it away gently.

"I should've told you sooner," I whispered.

She smiled softly. "You're telling me now. That's what matters."

I wanted to believe that, but the heaviness in my chest didn't lighten.

Mom squeezed my hand one last time before standing.

"Get some rest, honey. We'll talk more when you're ready."

I nodded, watching her leave. The door clicked shut behind her, and I let out a shaky breath.

I told myself it was over. That Mason and I were done, but I knew it wasn't that simple.

And now, Adrian was in the picture even though there was a really low chance of us seeing each other again. I couldn't stop thinking about him. And what terrified me the most was that I wasn't sure I wanted to.