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Chapter 3: Catelyn II

Summary:

Cat and Ned have a long awaited conversation about a multitude of things, ranging from Robert's Rebellion to Jon and Sansa.

Notes:

First of all Jon's name is 'Jaehaerys' regardless of what is said in this chapter, it'll be explained later. Lyanna named him 'Aegon' after his brother (who as stated lived in this AU unbeknownst to her) and for Rhaegar who never offered a male name and believed his son to be the PWWP and named Aegon. Elia's party will refers to Jon as 'Jaehaerys' as they are aware that was Lyanna's preferred male name.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

After assigning chambers for her grandchildren and informing Winterfell's stewart of the occupation of the rooms Cat made her way to Ned's solar. Tonight they would be supping in private so as to discuss all that Cat has waited for. Knocking on the door, she couldn't help but be relieved that after tonight there will be no more secrets between the two.

"Come in." Ned's voice sounded through the door and Cat followed his command. Behind his desk sat the Lord of Winterfell and behind him hung the great blade of the Starks. Food was already set upon his desk but yet untouched as her husband had kindly waited for her to complete her task. The hearth and candles lit and warmed the room, it was probably hotter than Ned's liking but perfect for her. He was really trying to earn back her graces. Standing from his seat, Ned moved to pull out the opposing chair for her convenience, "Cat." 

"Ned," she said nodding before she accepted the gesture and moved herself closer to the desk to dine. Her plate was filled with her favorites of the food made today. Half way through their meal Cat would start the real conversation. It would do no good to be cranky over an empty stomach as heard Ned out. It was a sentiment shared by her husband. Though there was a pitcher of ale and another of wine, both went untouched as neither were heavy drinkers nor did they want the drinks for this moment.

The lord was quick to finish his plate as he gave his food his sole focus. On top of all the chaos that came with the appearance of their grandchildren the man lost his foster father, had he even had time to grieve for the man?

Well into her venison and vegetable stew Cat realized that Robert's arrival would require the keep to avoid hunts until the king is closer. The Baratheon's party was said to be a very large one and the king loved his meat. Excluding the Greyjoy Rebellion, Robert and Ned had not talked since the Northman left King's Landing a second time. Not only would Robert's visit put an unnecessary dent in their stores but might take their Lord. As if Ned hadn't done enough for the man, what has Robert done for Ned that wasn't in his own self interest? 

Robert's Rebellion, the only thing the Baratheon lost was a betrothed that did not love him back and the same had happened to Cat, where was her rise to royalty? While the Baratheon gained everything from the war, Ned lost the near entirety of his family. Yet in His Grace's newfound kingship, the man did nothing to reward Ned but rewarded everything to Tywin for being let inside a damn city and killing children. It was her father and Ned who saved the man's arse during the Battle of the Bells.. Yet Ned got nothing but Cat, Robb, Jon, and a bunch of dead men. The North doesn't have a single man among Robert's small council or Kingsguard. The Greyjoy Rebellion was just as profitable, a ward or more accurately hostage. 

"Catelyn." 

The call returned her from the past and to the sight of Cat's own white knuckles curled around her spoon. Huffing she looked to her beloved's face. 

Worried and slightly dreadful eyes watched her, he likely believed her anger was towards him rather than for him. His slightly thin lips remained closed as he cautiously awaited her reply.

"I was not upset with you if that is what you were thinking, I may yet be but not now. It was the king who held my anger, there is only one reason he could come here and bring half of King's Landing." Cat sighed, it would be a long few moons and a longer night.

A bit of the tightness in Ned's rigid posture was alleviated by her words and he too let out a hearty exhale. "Robert seeks a hand. Even I recognize he intends that man to be me. I don't wish to accept but I may be forced to. The king is not a man to take being declined well." Though the lord's eye's lacked the slight downwards tilt his nephew had, the grey orbs showed a similar sadness. 

Taking her husband's hand, Catelyn did her best to comfort him. They would survive the future, unlike in the time traveler's past, the family now knew of the imminent threats awaiting them. This time there would be no secrets between them, no lies, no unspoken truths. "We can consult our grandchildren in the morning. They know more than us." The absurdity of the presence of Sansa's future children was still at the front of her mind. "This is mad. Have we gone mad?" It was a genuine question, because she was beginning to feel a horrible kinship to Aerys. If the grandchildren weren't real then what was?

"Gods, I hope not. Had they not known of Jon's parentage and Jon Arryn's death, I might have believed us to be." Rubbing a hand over his long face in mental exhaustion before leaning back in his chair. "What do you think of them?" 

Honestly she had yet to evaluate them with all the distractions but she felt she had enough sense of their characters. "They seem like good children. Finding matches will certainly not be hard for their parents, all are very beautiful or handsome. From what I've seen they seem half as troublesome as our brood, though the youngest boy evidently may cause enough grey hairs." Arya, Bran, and Rickon give her enough strain together she wouldn't be surprised if she starts to grey soon like her husband.

Chuckling, Ned agreed. "Aye, I can't imagine what future Sansa must be feeling currently with their disappearance. The boy might share my name but he certainly has more of the wolf blood than I. Gods Cat! Have you noticed their names?" The excitement made him look younger, it was such a rare thing to see on his normally passive face.

The words and face duo made Cat give her own smile. "I did notice. Cailin, presumably after me and the fort. Minisa after my mother. Sara… perhaps Arya? Brynnard, you, my uncle, possibly Bran as well. Robyn, after Robb or Lysa's son. The eldest two though, those two names seem rather narcissistic, don't you think?" While lords and ladies had certainly named their offspring after themselves before, Cat had not thought Sansa of all people would condone such a thing, much less for the two eldests. 

Ned's smile remained as he slowly shook his head amused. "Aye, I suppose it is. Though Jon wasn't the name Lya gave him." The offhand comment directed them into the inevitable discussion.

Now that Catelyn thought about it, she found it curious he knew that the boy was even trueborn. The realization that Lyanna must have died on the birthing bed or of another sickness in her weakened state. Cat always had felt pity for the young woman since the first time she heard the rumor, then it had been for the dark suffering but now… Imagining what Lyanna went through and the fear she likely felt nearly brought Cat to tears. If the positions were different and she was dying alone and Robb, fatherless and soon to be motherless… It gave Cat the urge to kneel before the sole woman in the crypts to beg forgiveness and for the first time ever she wanted to give the bastard the most motherly embrace she could. She needed his name, his real name. The name Jon has since become synonymous with bastard, if she was to see him as who he was she needed to think him a prince."What is his name?"

"Lya said his name was Aegon Targaryen, I assume after his half-brother." While Ned's tone was without feeling his face was a mix of sorrow and mild amusement.

The edges of Cat's mouth twitched upward. "That will certainly be confusing if his namesake does indeed still live. Even more so if they are still in the same room, the Umbers at the very least have a title."

Her comment broke Ned out of his sorrow for the moment. "It doesn't help that the Dornish Aegon was the one not born in Dorne. I suppose light and dark Aegons would have to do?"

"Perhaps there is already an answer available. His children were aware of his parentage and Aegon's survival, surely they would know his name. It might just be me but Jon Targaryen neither sounds good nor right, does it?" Who would have thought that Catelyn Stark would be thinking of what name sounded best for Jon Snow. 

As kind as the Lord was, he was nearly as judgemental as Cat was. The slight twitch of his cheek at the use of the alternate name made Ned's agreement known to her. "I never thought about how it would sound with his house's name when I named him." The words led to a silence between the husband and wife.

In the end it was Cat who broke the silence with the question that kept coming back to the forefront of her mind. "Ned. Why did you lie? I understand why at first but after I gave you five children and my love. Do you not trust me?" It hurt. Both the beliefs the lie put in her head as well as all that was hidden from her. 

Ned's mood soured into an exhausted version of his nephew's brood. Rubbing his face over with both hands before the lord let out a large breath of his reservations. "The fewer people that knew the better, it was treason and could get not just Jon and I killed but every Stark. Jon is my family but he wasn't yours and I knew the value you put in ours." He avoided saying the words but the meaning was clear: he thought she'd turn the boy over to Robert to protect her own family.

Would Cat have done so however? It was a dark revelation to realize she didn't know. An ever present danger to her children, Ned and herself or her nephew by marriage. As insulting as it was to have Ned not know either she couldn't deny it was a possibility. Before today she might have done so even after today part of her saw it as an option to keep him away from her precious daughter. But the thought also made her feel extremely guilty, had she not done enough to the boy?

Likely reading the guilt from her face, Ned took her hand whether for his comfort of her's she knew not. "Thinking it does not make you a bad person, Cat. There is no correct answer. So long as Jon lives, no matter where, if the truth is revealed I am next on the block and our children are in danger of the same. I spent more than ten years thinking about this. Not that I truly considered it but even I thought about how much easier everything would have been." He confessed it as if the thought had been his greatest sin, perhaps it was.

Cat gave a light squeeze to her husband's hand lightly to reciprocate the comfort he offered her through words. "If my thoughts alone do not make me a worse person than neither do yours." The truth is if thoughts were judged by the gods upon death then Cat may be sent to one of the seven hells while Ned's single pondering surely wouldn't mar such a clean record.

"A Southern through and through, using my own words against me." His tone was half teasing and half appreciative. Ned's mood was still down and likely to worsen throughout the night as she pulled the truth slowly from him.

Robert's Rebellion was a topic that Cat knew Ned would rather not speak of but she knew it was more important now than ever that she knew everything her husband did. "Ned, I must know all that you know of the truth of the rebellion. You need not carry your burden alone, we are one, remember?" It was true, regardless of whether Ned told Catelyn or not his burdens tended to weigh on her in some form eventually, the obvious example was Jon Snow. 

Rising from his chair Ned led her to the chairs by the hearth. His face was as mournful as it always was when speaking of the war. "I suppose I should start with the betrothal. At the Eyrie me and Robert were close as I'm sure everyone is aware but eventually we spoke of our siblings. Most of my words described the five nameday sister I remembered leaving and Robert formed some sort of attachment to the idea of her in his head. Once I came of age and was able to travel between the North and the Vale, Robert proposed the idea of joining our houses. I supported the idea, even carried the message to my father and convinced him to accept. Truth is: I hardly knew Lyanna at the time, we spent eight years apart and then I split my time between kingdoms. She never wanted to marry Robert, told me so repeatedly, she knew Robert would not be faithful but I never spoke up for her, nobody did."

Cat had never heard of this, she did not imagine many did. Benjen was the only that came to mind, even Catelyn knew the two had been the closest of all the Stark siblings being the only two to not be fostered. 

Ned's guilt-ridden eyes were focused on the fire before them, he sighed before speaking again. "Then Harrenhall. She introduced me to Howland there. During the feast the prince played a sad song so beautifully it made Lya cry and she poured wine over Benjen for teasing about it. I believe that was the first time the two saw each other. She also pointed out three squires that bullied Howland, I thought nothing of it at the time but learned better from Benjen later. Then the tilts and you've heard the tales, those are all true. When I returned to Winterfell Ben revealed the Knight of the Laughing Tree had been Lya. Then the crowning and no one was happy about it or so I thought. I did not even look at Lya's reaction after her surprise, if only I had." He had so many chances to realize the truth and Ned's multiple failures to do so only multiplied his guilt.

Not having been at the legendary tourney, this was the only account Cat had ever heard first hand. Being a lady of the Riverlands she heard plenty of the details but Ned's family was a core part of the tales and he had a perspective the collective of stories could not match. In her youth she had wished for the opportunity for Brandon to crown her before all including the king, prove their love to all. There was a part Ned neglected to mention however. The years of bitterness forced her to ask: "You met Lady Dayne there, did you not?" 

"I did." Ned's short response was odd for a man who claims to not have shared a bed with the woman. But there was neither longing nor other emotions Cat would associate with love on the lord's face. Instead his eyes remained full of guilt, but for what? "Brandon convinced her to dance with me. I was attracted to her but I never bedded her, who did so I don't know. She might not have even been dishonored. It was not Brandon or Robert, both drunk themselves under the table that night, neither was it Benjen he helped me with the two."

It was a great relief to Cat that neither Brandon nor Ned slept with the Dornish woman. Though his mention of his attraction did arise jealousy in her but she could not blame him as they were not married or betrothed at the time and she fancied his older brother.

Sighing, Ned spoke back up, "The rest of the Rebellion goes on how you know until the Trident." He turned his regretful eyes to her before returning her to the flames. "Rhaegar attempted to parlay. He sent a messenger with the offer to give a letter from Lya if I came to a parlay without Robert. I refused," the final words were spoken with such self-loathing and regret, it caused Cat's heart to ache.

"Robert would never have let you go, at least not without him. You believed the prince to have done all means of evil to your sister, it is understandable to refuse. It could have been a trap and the words false." Cat had originally thought she would spend the night mad at her husband but now it was likely she would be comforting him over his demons and guilt. Taking his arm she caressed it soothingly but keeping in a loose grip so Ned could escape if needed.

Ned nodded in agreement but there was no sign of any relief to his guilt. "King's Landing was as it is known by rumors. The bodies… Gods… If Elia, Rhaenys and Aegon survived then children died for them… It is possible, neither the Mountain or Lorch would recognize them and the bodies were… unidentifiable. I didn't look close, I couldn't. And Robert… Robert was pleased at the sight. We fought then and I left for Storm's End and the tower."

Cat doesn't think she would have ever been able to sleep without dreamwine had she seen such a sight and hid the victim's half-brother. Involuntarily she imagined her children as babes with either a smashed head or unrecognizable though half a hundred stab wounds. The idea made her shiver and move her chair closer to Ned's. "I'm glad I married you, you are a better man, the best man. Any man who condones such villainy is a monster in the flesh of man." She recognizes her own hypocrisy and she can't justify her prayer especially today.

"I'm not, I'm not a good man." Ned's denial of her words was absolutely absurd, he was one of the most, if not the most honorable and good men in the realm. Few lords are so faithful, fewer had the honor to claim their bastard and raise him as if trueborn. Nearly none would lie at personal cost and commit treason to protect their nephew. Ned was good whether he thought so or not.

Sending him the most incredulous look Cat could, she could not believe him. "I believe we agreed not to lie tonight. You are most certainly a good man, being good does not mean you can't make mistakes."

The clenching of Ned's jaws and twitch of his arm muscles revealed the man's frustration. "Cat, you don't know what I've done."

Huffing, Cat prompted, "Then tell me."

"The tower, everything you heard about that was a lie. There was no battle. I did not slay Arthur Dayne. Lya was still alive if just barely, her final scream prevented us from battle. She had me promise to protect her child before she passed, I did so. I did what it took to keep my promise." Ned's voice was dark, bitter, and regretful. It was a scary thing to see on the normally passive man.

Her mind jumped to the darkest conclusion, had Ned and Howland killed those who did not return in cold blood? But Cat could not believe her Ned would do such a thing, he would not be able to look Jory in the eyes. "The others? What did you do to them?" She prayed to the Old Gods and the New that he did not murder them.

Pulling his arm from her gasp Ned hung his head in his hands. "I… I forced them into exile. William had a wife, Martyn had a son, Arthur had a sister. Yet I let them go. We tore down the tower to destroy any evidence we could not take and headed to Starfall. Arthur… I didn't inform the Daynes he lived when I returned the sword and Ashara killed herself over my damn lie." No wonder why the man put an end to the rumors about the woman. Ned probably felt enough guilt over it, he didn't need to hear her name constantly spoken aloud in his own keep.

Rising from her chair Cat moved before her husband and pulled the man into an embrace at her breasts. She rubbed his back, kissed the top of his head, she did everything she could to give Ned the comfort and love he needed. "I'm sorry for making things harder on you."

Ned pulled himself back in their embrace to look up at her like she was a gift from his gods. "You make things easier. Like now." He lifted her onto his lap and snuggled into her shoulder.

The position wasn't exactly agreeable for Cat as her dress and the chair's arms didn't allow much room. Ned's embrace and word's however warmed Catelyn's heart like nothing else.

A pleasant silence engulfed the room, both of them were okay with halting their emotional talks for a long moment of this. 

Cat had no idea of how much time had passed when she finally asked, "What are we going to do about Jon and Sansa?"

Instead of replying Ned leaned back and gave her a raised eyebrow.

"Surely, we must do something about the two of them. Ned, you cannot be seriously considering the match?" While Cat's thoughts may be affected by her previous feelings on the boy, the match was still not beneficial despite the boy being of royal blood. Not only could the pairing not be public but House Stark would gain nothing from it. 

Ned quietly chose his words before asking, "And who would you have her matched with? I get the sense that in the other time, we accepted Robert's probable proposal. I just told you of Lyanna's betrothal and what a mistake that was." The topic was never one Ned enjoyed, evidently his sister's reaction had a large part in forming that belief.

She had suggested many potential suitors for Sansa in the past, although Cat wished for a long betrothal so as to not be separated from her child so soon. Both of them agreed on that condition. All of her suggestions had been men of Southern houses and of strong repute. "The Tyrells, heirs of noble houses of the Riverlands, a Vale heir, Lysa's son may be young and sickly now but is still growing and Harrold Hardyng is set to inherit the Vale should the worst happen." All of those would create alliances and would make Sansa happy. Cat's daughter was a Southern lady and she would not wilt and freeze in the cold Northern air. 

"We don't know them. How can we know if they will treat our daughter right? We have not heard a single thing about the crown prince, what makes you think that we would hear of a lord?" Ned's frustration and caution was understandable, if they had betrothed their girl to the prince just what happened to her. Either way they would be responsible for whether their daughter found a happy marriage or a loveless one. The Lord did not want to push a betrothal after his last attempt resulted in war.

There was no way to know until they met the potential suitors but Cat would not give him the win in that regard. "And you think Jon will? The boy took three other wives, that says how highly he thinks of her. He was raised as a bastard." Cat disregarded the claims of her daughter's future happiness with the man because how could that insulting marriage be as happy as Cat's own. She knew Sansa deserved a love worthy of songs and the girl would not find it with Jon.

The slight glare from Ned, reminded her of the many times they had argued over the boy before. "He was raised as my son."

"Is that any better? They were half-siblings until today! You would condone the incest that created the Mad King? Have our daughter marry that man's grandson?" It was cruel to bring that up but if Cat wanted to stop this madness she would.

Ned's hands clutched tightly on the chair's arms. "Jon is nothing like the Mad King. They are cousins and you know that now. If you had actually tried to get to know the boy then you would trust no one more with our daughter. You've met our grandchildren, do they not think highly of their father? Do you wish to rob them of the opportunity to live? Had you not seen Jon defend and comfort her regardless of how she treats him?" Deflating at the end of his rant Ned gave a small huff. 

Catelyn was stunned by just how much Ned was for the match and the confidence he had in the boy. She wondered if he ever considered the match before today, although he clearly knew Sansa's thoughts at least before today. Her husband did not have the best sense of character but if he thought so highly of someone, it had reason. Perhaps Ned is correct this time, after Robert he certainly must be more critical. Observing the boy would not be hard and Cat recognized there were many she could ask about him. "Fine. I will not stand against it but neither will I support such a thing. There will be no betrothal, Sansa will decide what she wants on her own." Catelyn's daughter was smart enough to make the right choice, after Cat fixes the naivety problem that is.

Relieved Ned sighed loudly and wrapped his arms back around her. "Thank you, Cat. Give him a chance. He will not disappoint you. Jon is very much like me and Sansa very much like you, they can be happy. It will also mean Sansa will remain in Winterfell."

Separation from her children was not something Cat was looking forward to, quite the opposite really. Cat has not even seen her family since she left Riverrun with Robb when he was but a babe. Would Cat even see Sansa again if she married a Southern lord? "I suppose that it one positive. Although I don't quite know how to feel about the comparison. It reminds me a bit too much of their relation." The comparison was rather accurate however, much of Cat's dislike for the boy came from his similarity to Ned.

"It is rather odd. Before today I never would have considered it, I'm sure that for some like Tywin, Doran Martell or even your father it would have been their first thought." Ned wasn't wrong, had any of those men been in his position they would have used the boy for his claim.

Cat saw it as just another thing that made Ned a far better man than any, including her own father. "And that is precisely why I said you are one of the best men in the world." The smile she received from Ned made her feel younger, not that either were old. One of his calloused hands moved from her hip to rub circles on her thigh making her all too aware of their location. "Ned, I should probably check on the children. It is rather late. You however are welcome to our room."

Ned groaned in disappointment as Cat assumed all men would at such a delay. "I shall wait for you there. Don't take too long."

Removing herself from his lap Cat had to wiggle her legs to regain some of the lost sense of feeling in her limbs. "I will be checking in on our guests as well." She gave Ned a peck on the lips before slipping out the door.

Checking the children had been easy. The time travelers were all settled and were just as exhausted from all the emotions and questions as she was. Rickon had been put to bed in his room. Bran who was just barely awake enough to peak at her over his furs. Robb had been on his bed thinking over the happenings of the day. Arya was practicing sword moves with an imaginary sword and was swiftly sent to her bed. 

Evidently Ned and Cat forgot to discuss that topic in their conversation. The woman: Cassana was another forgotten topic, Catelyn kept forgetting to ask who her relation to Starks comes from. 

But the real trouble came from the daughter she was not expecting it from. Sansa had not been in her room. Finding the room empty, Cat nearly panicked and ran to Ned before realizing the bastard was also unaccounted for. 

Half the journey was practically spent in a storming walk but lightened over her words to Ned that she would give the boy a chance. He was not in her room which made it more likely her daughter is at fault. Damn her and Ned's over sheltering of the girl.

At the door Cat took a few calming breaths before knocking and subsequently being called in. Ned might be waiting longer for her than he first thought. 

Notes:

Cliffhanger. Sorry, not sorry. Well somewhat sorry as you won't find out the next chapter as it is the first Margaery chapter.

Ned is definitely all for Jonsa.

Somehow this ended up being the longest chapter so far. It was also the first I did not edit at 2:00 AM so hopefully it is a bit easier to read.

Today, I'm going to start reading the books for the first time so hopefully that will help me get a better sense of all the characters.

Upcoming Chapter POV Order:

Margaergy I

Jon I

Val I

Robb I

Elia I