22. Familial Bonds (2)

I knocked on the door but there wasn't any response, I waited for a moment before I pushed the doors open and walked inside.

The study room was lit up by the burning lamps and there was a lone figure who sat on the chair with their head on the desk. There was a tray of half-eaten food on the table and I couldn't help but feel pity for the man.

I walked to his side and gently nudged his arm, "Father?"

He groaned before he sat up straight, "Um... What?"

"You should rest in your room."

He looked down at me and his eyes went wide slightly.

"Re-Reina? What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to talk with you but,"

My eyes ran over his dishevelled hair and the dark bags under his eyes and I sighed.

"You look tired, please return to your room for now."

He stared at me for a moment before he shook his head.

"I am all right, Reina. I was taking a little break. I still have some work left, you should head back and sleep, it's late." He smiled but it didn't seem to touch his eyes.

"You can finish that tomorrow, Father. It's not good to neglect your health."

"It's fine, Reina." He placed his hand over my head gently ruffling my hair, "This is the least I can do to make sure that you won't have to..."

He suddenly stopped and my eyebrows twitched, "I won't have to what?"

He shook his head and I sighed before I held his hand, "Come,"

He reluctantly stood up and I led him out of the study, "Uh, Reina, that..."

"I'll make sure you sleep well, so please be quiet and let me escort you to your room."

"Ah, but-"

I turned to look at him using my puppy eye look, "You don't want me to?"

His eyes went wide and his cheeks went red, "N-No, that's not what I..."

He gave in easily making me lead him to his room, he obliged whatever I said and finally, I tucked him in making him stare at me as I sat beside him.

"Yo-You should return to your room too, Reina."

"I will stay till you sleep." I said as I patted his shoulder and he looked at me before closing his eyes.

"... I'm sorry for making you worried," I mumbled making him look at me.

"That's-"

"I know you... must be really worried after what happened in these past few days and blaming yourself for everything."

He sat up and I looked down at my hands, "It's not your fault..."

"... It is." His voice was quite low, "If I weren't such an incompetent father then you wouldn't have to take such risks."

"You are not incompetent," I said firmly.

"But... I was fooled and almost went bankrupt."

"That doesn't mean you are incompetent."

"Then as Silas says... foolish. I might really bring the duchy to ruins someday."

At that moment, I really wanted to smack Silas but I held it in and focused on Duke Arthur.

"I... I will never be good enough."

His words hit me like the bullet that sent me to this world and I couldn't help but see the reflection of my past life self juxtaposing over his form.

The sorrow and the despaired expression on his face made my heart start to beat fast.

The memories of my past life flashed before my eyes, every time I tried harder and harder to get one word of praise from my parents and every time I would see the

disappointment in their faces which made me feel inadequate and lacking.

The feeling that had haunted me all my life and drove me to the point that I couldn't even see myself in the mirror was now standing in front of me. A lump formed into my throat and my heart seemed to grow heavy as I clenched my fists trying to calm my breathing.

"I don't deserve to be your father."

"That's not true!" I almost shouted making him look at me with wide eyes.

"Re-"

"There's no need for you to be perfect, it's not your fault!" I said firmly.

"How can you say that you don't deserve to be our father when you are working so hard for our sake?"

His eyes went even wider and he started waving his hands as he started panicking.

"Re-Reina, I'm sorry. Do-Don't cry, please!"

Cry...?

I touched my cheeks feeling the moisture staining my fingers and sniffled making him panic even more.

"I-I-I'm sorry, Reina. I won't ever say that again, please stop crying."

"Th-Then promise me to never think that you are incompetent or that you don't deserve to be our father."

"I promise..." He sighed and I wiped my eyes feeling more tears coming.

When was the last time that I had cried?

My eyes suddenly went wide as I felt the Duke's arms coming around me and he pulled me into his chest gently patting my back making the walls that I had built around my heart start to shudder and the tears flow even more.

"I'm sorry, Reina." He said and I shook my head.

"Don't say sorry when you did nothing wrong."

He patted my back and my body slowly relaxed making me wonder if I had ever felt this peaceful in my life.

"After... your mother passed away..." He spoke, "I felt as if the world would end for me... but she left me two precious gifts that I couldn't bear to leave alone."

He gently squeezed me making me feel his calming heartbeats as I rested my cheek over his chest.

"I thought that if I could work hard and not let you two see any troubles then it would be enough but... I didn't realise that it wasn't only me who was willing to work hard, you and Rune... I didn't even realise when you two grew up so much."

His touch didn't feel uncomfortable as he brushed his large hand over my back rather it felt warm and soothing.

"I didn't realise that I made you two so worried. I am happy that you helped me out but... I would be even more happy if you wouldn't have been in danger."

"It was because there are bad people out there, Father. Besides, I'm strong so, I can protect myself, Rune and you now." I mumbled feeling my eyelids growing heavy.

He chuckled lightly, "I'm sure you will but, I wish I could protect you too."

"You are... you are the only one that I could rely on..."

"I'm glad." He said and I hummed.

"... I love you, Reina." I hummed again as he spoke that and ended up dozing off.

The next day, I woke up feeling a warm and heavy appendage over my side making me groan slightly as I moved and felt the shift in weight beside me.

I opened my eyes watching Duke Arthur's face a few inches from mine and his arms holding me. I guess I ended up falling asleep after talking or rather crying.

"Good morning, Reina." I looked at Duke Arthur whose eyes were open and his molten golden orbs seemed like they were back to their usual radiance.

His smile made me feel relieved.

I returned to my room nearly giving Penny a heart attack as my face and eyes were swollen and red.

After taking a bath and changing, I went over to check on the people that were rescued from Count Stanson's place. They were staying in an inn near our mansion and they seemed like they were happy.

They cried and thanked me as I arrived and told me as how they were temporarily staying there and how the Duke had told them that he would arrange housing and jobs for them.

I felt relieved after hearing that, Duke Arthur was a kind man and he knew how to take care of others. I was the foolish one amongst us who ended up hurting him so much.

[Goddess of Wisdom is relieved that you realised your folly.]

[Defender of Divine Glory sighs with relief.]

"Don't go around feeling relieved." I told them as I looked at the people around me.

"It's time to start the plan now."