Chapter 64. Underworld

Prince Ian was perhaps the dullest person that Everly had ever met in her life and that was really saying something.

After all, she'd grown up alongside Samuel Bellweather, a young man so lacking in personality that for years she refused to mentally capitalize his first name. Lowercase lettering better suited a nonentity like him. She only promoted him to his name's correct spelling after accidentally deliberately setting him up to be murdered by a cranky old demon.

Imagine Everly's surprise to now discover that Samuel had a spiritual doppelganger who was royalty. It was shocking. Shocking! She was genuinely shocked.

"All righty, how do we feel about setting the capital ablaze and siccing the undead on the survivors?" she casually asked Carter one day, while loafing about on the school grounds, beneath the shade of a large oak tree.

"Would your sisters approve of that decision?" Carter asked after giving her words careful consideration.

"No, probably not, but they're out there in the world doing the fun stuff," (N)Everly whined. "They get to do all the meaningful work! In the meanwhile, I'm stuck here babysitting all these worthless nepo babies!"

"It's an important task, oh great one. Your presence here is a crucial requirement for the plan," Carter said placatingly.

"Carter, these people are so boring!" Everly complained. "I don't know why I thought magic school would be more interesting than regular school. It's just the same collection of sad cliches with fantasy elements added. None of these little shits stir my heart in the slightest."

"What about Lady Kelsie? Do you no longer derive twisted enjoyment from her sadistic bullying?" asked Carter.

"Ugh," Everly said. "She's the most disappointing one of all. She can't think of anything past all her rote schoolgirl rough housing. The hair pulling and slapping has been fun, but she won't take it up a notch!"

"How so?" asked Carter.

"Pfft," Everly sneered. "No cutting me with a small blade, no burning me with matches, no forcing me to kiss her and then calling me a homophobic slur to deny her enjoyment of it, no making me spend the night in her room and forcing me to sleep on the floor like a dog. The bitch is basic, and I'm over it."

"Everly…are you alright?" Carter asked her after several quiet moments had passed.

"Of course, I am," Everly replied. "What makes you ask?"

"Are you…certain? I sometimes find your words concerning."

"Don't be a prude, Carter," Everly said scornfully. "I have a perfectly normal and healthy urge to explore the things that interest me. There's nothing abnormal about that."

"Nothing abnormal about that?" Carter asked incredulously. "Great one, are you being serious right now? I can never tell when you're being sarcastic."

"Maybe I'll just build some sort of formless slime monster to immerse myself in," Everly mused. "Something that can lightly burn me with digestive acid while simultaneously hitting all the right notes hard. Something that'll really blur that pain/pleasure threshold and provoke all kinds of crazy physiological responses."

"Everly, please don't say things like that!" Carter said in horror.

"Why not?" Everly replied. "Anyone with a basic knowledge of Japanese animation can tell you that a woman could do a lot worse for a partner than a tentacled slime monster. If anything, I'm really missing out on an experience."

"You are royalty, Everly!" Carter said. "Have any humanoid consort that you wish, but please don't create pleasure slimes! That sounds utterly horrific!"

"Pleasure slimes?" Everly said thoughtfully. "Huh. Carter, has anyone ever told you that you have a real knack for branding? Pleasure slimes. Slimes for her pleeeeeasure. Made by women for women. Comes in a variety of different colors so you will too!"

"That is an awful joke."

"Hey, who's joking? We might be on to something here!" Everly said brightly. "It's not like this world has an Adam and Eve catalog in circulation. Not only could we create the market for adult novelties, but we could also completely corner it!"

"Everly, you're going to take over the planet!" Carter insisted. "Surely you have greater concerns than indulging in these sort of lurid thoughts!"

"OKAAAAAY, Carter, okay! You win!" Everly said with an exaggerated sigh. "We won't start mass production of the pleasure slimes until after I grind civilization beneath my heel."

"I'm glad you can see reason when it suits you, great one," Carter said in an unctuous manner.

"Yep, I'm reasonability incarnate," Everly said with a nod. "So, let's get back to making plans about how we're going to kill everyone in the capital."

"You weren't joking about that?" asked Carter.

"Nope!" Everly confirmed. "I'm bored. I hate being bored. I came to this planet so that I'd never be bored again and yet here I am. I've gotta take that frustration out on somebody, little man. It may as well be all the background nobodies."

"But what about your code? What about your principled stance against indulging in random slaughter?" asked Carter.

In response, Everly erupted into laughter, so amused was she by her servant's words.

"Ahhh, Carter. I fucking love you, man," she said once she'd settled down. After wiping a tear from her eye, she continued. "Listen, you're a good guy, Carter. I really like having you around. In a way, I enjoy you more than Grail, because you don't have nearly as much baggage as that angsty old geezer. But I must tell you, for your own sake, don't put any hopes in me listening to my better angels."

"What do you mean?" asked Carter.

"Prime Everly is full of shit," (N)Everly smirked. "She's chock-full of it as a matter of fact. Her little code of conduct isn't really a part of the game. It's just flavor text. Fake nuance to make her seem deeper than she really is. There's no meaning there, bud."

"Then why does she abide by it?" Carter asked her.

"Commitment to the role," Everly said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "We love getting into character! Roleplaying is fun. But at the end of the day, it isn't an iron clad law. We're not beholden to anything, not even ourselves. We'll do whatever we want whenever we wish."

"That's not what she promised us," Carter said quietly.

"No, it isn't," Everly agreed. "But honestly, what are you going to do about it?"

She and Carter then silently matched gazes for several long moments before Carter shuddered and looked away.

"I will…stay quiet and obey," he said.

"Of course, you will," Everly smiled as she reached forth a hand to lightly scratch one of Carter's long ears. Despite the undercurrent of fear flowing throughout him, Carter couldn't help but sigh in pleasure at his master's touch.

"As your chief advisor, I feel I must warn you that Lord Grail will be less understanding once he truly comprehends your nature, great one," Carter said. "He believes in you. He believes you truly want to save this world."

Everly frowned at Carter's words. Grail. Grail, Grail, Grail. What did prime Everly see in him anyway? What about him fascinated her so much? He objected to everything fun she wanted to do, talked back as though they were equals, and argued for peaceful solutions all the damn time.

At first, she thought she'd wanted to corrupt him. To slowly break his will and strip him of his idealism and claim him as a trophy of sorts. He'd be unwitting proof of her skill at manipulating others.

The problem, perhaps, was that he'd devoted himself so completely to her and with such earnestness, that she'd grown fond of him. She'd always demanded that others love her unconditionally. And in his own way, it appeared that Grail was doing exactly that. Why did that please her so much while simultaneously making her angry?

Prime Everly can't see it, she thought to herself. She's too close to him. Still too human. Beverly, Cleverly, and I, we're different. We were never human to begin with, so we possess the objectivity that Eve lacks. She's soft on Grail because he loves her. Which means WE love him in our own way. But we also hate him because love makes you weak.

(N)Everly wondered what that would mean for later. She's studied with him for centuries of hyper-time. Honestly, those two are as close as anyone could possibly be. He's an obvious vulnerability, but unlike poor little Fenneth, she's much too close to him to even consider having him removed. She can't see things clearly.

Still, awareness of this complication does me little good. If I bring it up, she'll punish me for it. Why? Because I'm an unhinged, reactionary little brat, so that means she is as well. I'm clearly the aspect of Everly that favors logic and planning, but even I'm not above shooting the messenger. Since that's the case, I'll just keep quiet and play ignorant. Who needs the hassle?

In the meanwhile, I'm still booooored…

***

As Everly wandered back to the main building, after reluctantly deciding to attend her afternoon lessons, the intriguing sound of violence reached her ears. She heard what sounded like a boy being viciously beaten by a small group of stronger boys.

"Oh, no!" she said dramatically to herself. "Could someone possibly be in trouble with a capital T?"

She hoped so. She really did.

Curious to see the show, Everly followed the sounds of the one-sided beating to an area at the side of the school, where three students wearing the academy's uniform were merrily stomping away on a fourth who was likewise dressed. His face and clothing were now spattered with blood, and his nose and eye were swollen.

Everly had to give his attackers credit, they were doing a very thorough job of kicking their victim's ass. You didn't often see that sort of ruthless disregard for another person's life in people that young. It must have been something that came with being a noble. Which made sense. Power and privilege had a way of exaggerating your worst tendencies as a human being.

"All right fellows, all right," said the one standing in the middle. A handsome, smug looking young man with golden hair and flawless white teeth. Everly had to admit she was intrigued by the sight of him. He had a domineering manner about him, an effortless arrogance and sense of untouchability that really suited her tastes. Maybe she should introduce herself to him? There was a possibility they could get into some real hijinks…

"Are you certain, Lord Aiden?" asked one of his friends as he kneeled down and pulled up their victim's head by his hair. "This little gutter shite dared to threaten you. I doubt anyone'll care if we smash his stupid skull to bits."

Aiden? Did he just say that the pretty one's name was Aiden? Nope, not happening, cancel the subscription, abort-abort-abort! Everly shook her head in revulsion. There were no cool Aidens in this world. Bearing that name was the equivalent of a facial tattoo on your soul.

"It's all right, lads, it's all right," Aiden said warmly. "I think our friend here has learned his lesson, haven't you, Tyler?"

He leaned closer to the prone boy and held a hand beside his ear. "Hmm? What's that?" he continued. "I can't quite hear you. I asked you if you learned your lesson?"

"You have to pay your tab," the bloodied boy managed to rasp. "The…the hobs want their money."

"And as I said earlier, I'll pay them when I have a free moment," Aiden smiled. "But I won't be manhandled into doing it. Especially not by some lowborn commoner blowback like you. Did you really believe you could make your little threats to me and get away with it? Are you that bereft of sense, you silly fool?"

"The hobs will get what they're owed," the boy warned them.

"How?" Aiden asked with a snort of derision. "I'm over here, and they're over there in their shanty little slum. And even if they could directly approach me by somehow getting past the academy's harada infused guards, I'd simply incinerate them with a blast of magic. Your trashy little gang can't touch me, Tyler. And as you've now thoroughly learned, you can't touch me, either. So…I guess what I'm getting at is, go fuck yourself?"

Aiden's friends began chortling with laughter as though he'd said the funniest thing imaginable as the three of them walked away, leaving the humiliated Tyler behind.

Ahhh, so that was what had been going on. Tyler was a fellow lowborn attendant of the academy. His mother had probably been a concubine, like Everly's had been. But unlike Everly, who'd been permitted to receive her father's last name before she changed it to her mother's, Tyler was a blowback. Which was an extremely insulting term for an unwanted bastard whose noble father was being forced to pay for his education due to kingdom law.

This Tyler kid would have probably gone completely unacknowledged if he hadn't had some kind of talent for magic that proved his parentage. So, that meant that he was both an embarrassment and a burden to his family.

Everly thought that sounded ridiculously funny.

Apparently, Tyler also considered himself to be some manner of gangbanger. He probably thought growing up on the streets made him more dangerous than his peers, which was absolutely delusional! Getting into street fights and indulging in petty crime didn't quite match being trained how to fight by an elite personal guard. Aiden had undoubtedly been learning the art of combat since he was old enough to hold a sword.

Add a year or two of training in magic at the academy and with private tutors, and he was more than a match for poor Tyler. The kid must have been an idiot for thinking he could strongarm him in the name of whatever gang had made the request.

That's so sad, Everly thought. And you know what? Whoever these hobs are, they must be extremely bottom tier if they not only got swindled by some noble brat, but they also had to rely on a sap like this this chump to get their money back. What a bunch of losers.

Man, if I were running things, this would have gone so much more smoothly…

Everly paused as if a bolt of divine inspiration had struck her from on high.

Why not run things? Crime was one of those things that people liked doing. And if they liked doing it so much…why not do it for her? The underworld was part of the world, after all, so logically speaking, that meant she had a right to step in and take over whenever she felt like it.

So, with that being the case, why not become the ultimate Crime lord? She'd unify the underworld under her singular rule.

She'd totally Wilson Fish that shit!

Wait, no, no. Wilson Fisk. That was the character's name. Duh.

At the very least, this sounded like an amusing little side project that would keep her from going out of her mind from boredom.

It could be fun. It could be real fun.

With her decision now made, Everly walked to the nearly unconscious Tyler and began slapping the back of his head. He groaned in pain and barely stirred, which Everly found annoying.

"Hey," she said insistently. "Hey! Wake up, dummy. I've got a proposition for you. This is the luckiest day of your life, bud!"

Instead of responding joyfully, Tyler said something incomprehensible and passed out.

"Huh," Everly said. "Not the most enthusiastic reception ever, but screw it, I'll find a way to make it work. You and me, kid! Straight to the top!"

All the way up.