Squirm

"Hey, Akane, while you're up, would you mind grabbing me a…"

"Whoooooooooooooooooop!" came a chorus of excited feminine voices, cutting off Ranko's words. 

Ranko sighed, her forehead falling into her palm. "Really? Again?!"

Giggling, Kumiko nudged Ranko's shoulder gently with her fist. "You know the rules! Your groom's name is Aki, and every time you say it as Akane…" 

Yui wordlessly finished Kumiko's directive, handing Ranko a shot glass of top-shelf tequila over her shoulder. 

Shaking her head, Ranko took the little vial of liquid from her sister. "I know! I know! You girls are gonna kill me before the night is over at this rate! It's not even 8:30 yet!" With a roll of her eyes, she threw back the shot to the cheers of the assembled bachelorette party. She turned the glass upside-down, adding it to the stack of five that already stood in front of her on the top of table one.

"It's not fair! If she were dressed like a guy, maybe, but…" Ranko ran her hand playfully around the hem of Akane's glittery blue skater dress as she passed. "Look at her!"

"Hey!" Ukyo reached over Ranko's lap, grabbing her wrist and pulling it back away from Akane. "Hands off the bridesmaids! We don't want your future husband getting jealous, no matter how drunk you are!"

Ranko laughed, glancing around the bar room. The Phoenix was empty, save her cadre of companions. Nearly every woman that was important in her life was there - even Kasumi, though she mostly was keeping to herself with a glass of wine. Kumiko and Ukyo flanked the bride at the VIP table, with Akane seated to Ukyo's left. And they're all here to make me suffer, Ranko thought, her face flushing.

"Better be careful, little star. When you walk down the aisle tomorrow, you've gotta be able to… ya know, walk." Hana laughed, tilting the neck of her beer bottle in her youngest daughter's direction.

Snickering, Sakura reached across the VIP table and nudged Ranko's shoulder with her fist. "Yeah… walking funny's supposed to be reserved for the honeymoon, girlfriend!"

"I swear, Sakura, if you and Yui try to get us another present…" Ranko's face was beet red at the thought of it.

Her sister-in-not-quite-law giggled in response. "What's the matter, sis? Didn't you like the last one?"

Ranko looked up and to her right at the feel of Akane's gentle fingers on her cheek. "Oh, no," Akane said with a devilish smirk. "She fucking loves it." Akane reached out, idly flicking the silver heart dangling from Ranko's white lace choker. "Doesn't she?"

The redhead's only answer was to hide her face in both of her hands. She only looked up from her palms at the sound of a glass hitting the table. Looking up, she found a Glass Slipper cocktail sitting in front of her, a long plastic straw protruding lopsidedly from the crystalline shoe the pink cocktail was served in. "Really, Yui?!" Ranko rolled her eyes, reaching for the molded novelty straw. "You just had to get the dick-shaped straws, didn't you?" The bit of white chocolate foam dripping from its tip did little to quell Ranko's discomfort as she eyed it.

"Thought you could use the practice," Yui shot back with a snicker. "Unless you would rather wait for the stripper."

Ranko rolled her eyes, shaking her head as she tossed the foamy straw to the tabletop. "You didn't get a stripper. You wouldn't do that to me! Especially not in front of Mom! Even you have your limits!"

The blonde bartender scoffed, nodding her head. "Okay. If you think so!"

"Don't worry about it," Hana said with a grin, scooping her black leather jacket from the back of one of the bar stools and slipping it on over her white Jim Beam tee shirt. "I'm heading out for the night. Wouldn't wanna cramp you girls' style too much with all of my oldness." She leaned down, giving her youngest daughter a kiss on the crown of her head through her flame-red hair. "Have fun, honey. See you in the morning."

The bride-to-again-be looked up to Akane as Hana made for the door. There was a cloud of anxiety forming in her eyes. "She… she didn't actually get one, did she?!"

Akane shrugged her shoulders, a wolfish smirk crossing her lips as she sipped her cocktail. "Maybe. But you gotta remember, Yui and Sakura didn't plan this thing alone. Mei and Izzi helped, Hitomi and Emi helped, and so did Nabiki." She reached out, poking her lover playfully on the nose. "Oh, and I might have had a few… suggestions, too." She reached across the table for Ranko's discarded straw, jabbing it back into the frothy glass shoe. "Now, drink up. You just might need some liquid courage."

Ranko looked up to the ceiling with a loud groan as Akane laughed. "I am so utterly, completely fucked, aren't I?"

"Not yet, babe." Akane dragged her fingers down her bride's arm. The whisper-soft touch on Ranko's ever-sensitive skin elicited a hard shudder from the smaller girl. "Best save that for your wedding night, too."

The left side of the tinted glass double door at the front of the bar opened, and Ranko's back stiffened. Oh no. They did it. They really got a stripp..

"Hey, girls!" Ayako giggled as she trundled through the door in a sparkly green skirt and a cream-colored blouse, tossing her enormous brown leather purse to the bar counter. "We having fun yet?!"

Yui cackled as she set about building her older sister a Manhattan behind the bar counter that she all but called home. "Ran-chan, you should have seen your fucking face! I thought you were gonna piss yourself!"

Craning her neck to look around the bar room, Akane's brow furrowed. The place looked like it was ready to open on any regular night. There were no balloons, no streamers, and no flowers. No ramp leading up to the stage, as there had been at her first wedding to the blushing redhead sitting to her left. Nothing whatsoever out of place to indicate that a wedding was due to take place in the room in less than sixteen hours. "Yui, are you sure we can't help you decorate? There's so much to do, and with all of us here, we can get it done in no time."

"I said we'll take care of it." Yui rolled her eyes with an exasperated sigh. "You worry too much. Shut up and drink. The place will be ready for a wedding when it needs to be. I promised Ranko."

Akane nodded nervously. "I know, it's just… for as much as we're teasing her about it, this is Ranko's career on the line here. We need to make sure we…"

"She knows, Akane." Sakura shot a glare at the black-haired girl as she emerged from the hallway leading back to her office and the kitchen beyond. "We said we'll handle it, and we'll handle it."

Akane pumped her fist in the air, turning back toward her bride with a victorious grin. "Good luck beating that!" She reached out, poking the little heart swaying on Ranko's necklace again. "Not even a badass like you can do better than three."

"Akane! I said I'm not gonna do…" She rolled her eyes as a chorus of cheers rose from the women surrounding her. "Awwwww, dammit!" 

Almost simultaneously, Izumi handed a shot glass full of clear liquid down to the bride-to-be, and Emi dropped a stack of five weighted rings coated in gray rubber on the table in front of her. 

"I said no," Ranko insisted, sighing as she slammed the shot into her mouth and added the glass to the upside-down stack on the table. She gestured to the small box on the floor a few meters away with her open hand. "I don't even know where those friggin' things have been." 

With a giggle, Hitomi hopped up from her seat, her white tennis skirt whipping around her thighs as she flitted up to the VIP table and wrapped her arms around Emi. "I do! Don't worry, though; they're clean!"

"Aw, c'mon! Like, really, 'Tomi?" Ranko cringed, sticking her tongue out in disgust. "Why do you even have that many?! Gods, you're a freak!" 

With a pouty expression, the short brunette shrugged under her partner's armpit. "You know what they say about variety."

Clapping her hands in her seat, Nabiki whooped loudly. She cupped her hands around her mouth, using them like a megaphone to project her voice to the VIP table over the music. "Come on, sis! Show us how it's done!" 

"Just have some fun with it. We all did it." Akane leaned over from her seat next to Ranko, resting a gentle hand on her bare shoulder and whispering in her ear. "If you beat my score, I'll even let you kiss me."

The redhead flushed at the thought of even needing permission to kiss her wife, but Akane had been maintaining the pretext that she was in bridesmaid mode, as Ranko's sister rather than her partner, all night. "A… alright. It's on! Stand back!" She snatched the stack of rings from the table, striding to the X that had been placed on the hardwood floor with blue painter's tape. The assembled women cheered loudly as she took her mark. 

"I can't believe you guys are making me do this," Ranko said with a shake of her head. She tossed the first of her five rings toward the small wooden box sitting on the floor two meters away from her mark. The weighted ring bounced once before settling around the shaft of one of the twelve upright objects arrayed in rows of three within. 

The chorus of cheers only grew louder as Ranko threw her second ring, but it failed to find its mark. It ricocheted off of the bright orange tip of the tallest of the forest of faux phalluses and rolled across the floor until it came to rest at Mei's feet.

"What's the matter, Ran-chan?" Mei giggled as she picked up the ring, setting it on her table. "Can't handle the big ones?"

Scoffing, Ayako reached out and ruffled her younger sister's cotton candy-blue hair between her pigtails. "Oh, please! That thing would come out of your fuckin' mouth."

"Right?!" Ranko laughed. "This one's more your speed, Mei." She threw another ring, underhanded, giggling as it looped the shortest of the twelve toys and sank to the bottom of the hot pink shaft. When the ring hit bottom, the device vibrated once with a loud buzz before falling over, starting a domino effect that knocked over three more.

Mei cackled, shaking her head as Hitomi set about resetting the toys to their upright positions. "Nah, I moved on from Shin, remember?!"

"C'mon, Ranko! You got this, girl!" Shiori screeched in her excitement as only a cheerleader could, waving her arms in the air in encouragement. Her denim half-jacket and coral-colored tank top slid up her torso, revealing the arc of stars tattooed along her waistline.

The redhead cast another ring. It hit the outer frame of the wooden box and bounced up, spinning end over end until it caught on a bit of yellow silicon and slid halfway down the slightly curved column before coming to rest between it and its neighbors.

"YEAH!" Shiori pumped her fist in the air, standing up on the seat of her chair. "That's a tie with Akane! One more, Ran-chan! You can do it! Whoooooooooooooooo!"

The young bride's arm was cocked back when Akane strode up to her, heel over toe, a lustful look in her eyes. Ranko paused, almost freezing in place. "Ak…"

Akane reached down for Ranko's wrist, lifting the hand bearing her final ring and gently blowing cold air through it into Ranko's palm. The sensation sent the redhead shivering from head to toe. "For luck."

"That's ch-cheating!" Ranko stammered, her face aflame as Akane giggled and flounced back to her chair. She swung her arm to toss the final ring, but while it was in motion, the glass door at the front of the Phoenix opened with a loud bang. 

Oh gods, Ranko thought. Everyone we invited is already here. Did they really get a… shit! She cringed as the ring sailed wide of the box entirely, bouncing harmlessly on the hardwood floor. 

"Sorry!" Crash winced at the glare evident on Ranko's face as she whirled toward the entrance to face the newcomer. "I… just forgot my wallet and had to come back for it." He paused as the furious expression on Ranko's face transitioned into a deep crimson blush. "Uh, Ranko? You okay?"

They wouldn't have asked him to… Ranko balled her left hand into a fist, shaking it menacingly in front of her chin. "Matsuyama, I swear, if you take your fucking pants off…"

The blond guitarist sputtered, almost falling over mid-stride on his way to the stage. "What… wait, WHAT?!"

"Hey, don't even think about it!" 

Ranko whipped her head around, her loose, wavy hair cascading over her shoulder as she turned to face the new speaker. 

"You had your chance, and you decided you wanted Aki. That one's mine!" Ukyo giggled, slipping off of her barstool to throw her arms emphatically around her boyfriend. "Mine," she repeated for emphasis as she gave Crash's waist a tight squeeze.

"You know it, babe," Crash said in reply, grinning as he rested his elbows on Ukyo's shoulders and hugged her about the neck, lowering his head and breathing deeply of the smell of her hair. 

With a shoo gesture with the back of her hand, Nabiki stalked toward the bar on her stiletto heels. "Okay, you got what you need. Out, out! This is a no boys allowed event!" She couldn't resist a little smirk in Ranko's direction as she made her assertion.

"How's it coming," Ukyo whispered as she gave Crash one final squeeze. 

Crash sighed, kissing her cheek and whispering in her ear. "It's gonna be a long night." He released her, waving to the assembled women and making for the door to leave. 

"Izzi, you ready to set up the next game?" Mei giggled, dancing in her chair to Rhythm is a Dancer by the European group Snap! as it pounded from the bar's twelve-speaker sound system.

Ranko shook her head, waving off her sisters. "Please, no more games! I don't think I've stopped blushing from the last one yet!" She smoothed the skirt of her yellow sundress, crossing her legs at the knee. 

Izumi snickered, putting down her Hypnoteaser and reaching behind her chair for a long cardboard tube. "You do realize that's the point, right, little sister?"

"Yeah, well…" Ranko glanced up to her left, smirking at her wife. "How come Ak… Aki doesn't have to do a weird night with the boys where they do all the gross boy shit?!" Gotta be careful. Don't need to take too many more shots tonight. "It's no fair!"

Tossing the white plastic lid of the tube on the table, Izumi chuckled again. "It's not Aki's fault you have to get married again, is it?!" She shook the tube, and a rolled poster and a collection of small cylinders rattled out of it onto the tabletop. "Hush up and take your medicine." She reached out, bonking the redhead gently on the head with the empty cardboard tube.

Ranko covered her eyes with her hands. "Oh, gods! Not this game again!" 

Cackling, Yui reached over the back of Ranko's chair and squeezed her shoulders tightly. "Yeah, well, we remembered how much you loved it at Izzi's bridal shower, so…"

Owww! Not so hard, Yui! Ranko winced, and wasn't sure whether Yui's painful grip on her ever-sensitive skin or the poster depicting a fully nude, muscular man that Izumi had unfurled and secured to the wall of the bar with a few gobs of blue poster tack was more responsible for it. "Aww, gross! Did you have to get one that's freakin' naked?!"

"You'd better get used to it, Ran-chan. After all, you're marrying a man in the morning! And who knows what he's gonna wanna do to you afterward?!" Ukyo giggled, stuffing a piece of vanilla sponge cake in her mouth with her fingers. 

"I do," Akane said, a devilish snicker in her eyes as she traced her finger ever so gently down the side of Ranko's neck. "I know exactly."  

"Rhythm is a dancer! It's a soul's companion! You can feel it everywhe-ere! Ooh!" Mei giggled, singing along with the bar's sound system as she slipped off her chair in her denim jumper and reached for one of the tubes of lipstick. 

Ranko sighed, letting her head fall into her hand. "I hate you all for this. Just so you know." 

Mei turned to face Ranko - or, at least, she thought she did, but with the blindfold Kumiko had applied to her, she wasn't quite sure. She crossed her ankles, bending at the knees in a half-hearted attempt at a curtsey. "Then our sisterly duties are being performed as intended."

"Did you just bow, Mei?" Ranko snickered, sipping from her glass of soda. "You're so short, I couldn't really tell."

Izumi tapped the poster, and Mei turned her head in the direction of the sound. "Remember," Izumi said. "Closest kiss to his lips wins. You got this, Mei!"

"This might not be fair," Emi said with a chuckle. "I'm not sure Mei can even reach his lips." 

Mei stomped her foot on the floor, clenching her fists. "I'm gonna do…"

"If you say so, Mei," Ayako interrupted. Laughing along with her fellow partygoers, Ayako rested her hands gently on her sister's shoulders. "Okay, you ready, Mei?" She spun Mei around three times before releasing her in the general direction of the poster. "Go get him, sis!" 

The blue-haired girl stumbled forward, shambling like a zombie with her arms outstretched until her fingers touched what felt like poster paper. She stood up on her tiptoes, planting a kiss on the poster. Laughing triumphantly, she ripped off the blindfold to find her bright blue kiss mark just above the nude man's right nipple. "Awww, dammit!" Her shoulders slumped in disappointment as the laughter of her sisters and friends rained down around her.

"Okay, Ranko. Pay attention, now. I'm gonna give you some bridal training real quick. Show ya what the boys really like." Hitomi tittered as her girlfriend finished sliding the pink blindfold over her eyes. Emi spun her thrice, and Hitomi charged forward until her fingers touched the poster. To the loud whoops and whistles of her friends, Hitomi dropped to her knees facing the wall, leaning forward and placing a bright red kiss mark below the man's waist, at the top of his left thigh.

Pulling the blindfold off while still on her knees, she noticed her kiss had missed its intended target, snapping her fingers in disappointment with a wide swing of her left arm. "Well, close enough that you get the idea, anyway!"

The bride-to-be shook her head, giggling brightly, but her cheeks burned hot. "Yeah, not sure that's happening, but… my husband and I can talk about it, I suppose."

"Alright, girls." Akane hopped down out of her chair, taking one final sip from her Regular Girl cocktail and wiping her lips dry on her forearm before reaching out for a pink tube of lipstick. "Time for a real master to show you how it's done."

Ranko scoffed loudly as Akane applied her lipstick. "You?! A master at kissing boys?!" She blushed red-hot, covering her mouth with her hand. You must have tried maybe twenty times back when I was in boy mode, and every time was more awkward than the one before, Ranko recalled with a wide smile. "Now this, I gotta see!"

"Don't tease too hard, Ranko," Nabiki said with a devilish smirk as she released her youngest sister from her spin. "After all, you're next." 

Despite the blindfold, Akane strode confidently across the bar room, walking heel over toe in her slender pumps to the uproarious cheers of her fellow bridesmaids. She stopped just before bumping into the wall, resting her hand softly on the poster. "Hey, baby." She leaned forward, planting a kiss on the man in the photo's chin. 

A chorus of cheers and whoops told Akane she'd been successful even before she removed her blindfold, but when she did, she turned and snickered at her bride-to-again-be. "Now that's how you do that. Bet you can't do better, Ranko!" She stepped off to her left, standing just a few meters from the poster and leaning on the wall.

Damn, Ranko thought with a snicker. Dad's blind-fighting training came in handy for that, huh? But you forget, Akane, I got that training too. "Okay, A… you wanna play that way? I accept your challenge!" Ranko slid out of her chair to the floor, reaching for a tube of glittery emerald lipstick. She puckered her lips and began to apply it, chuckling to herself. Fuck, the last time I played this game, I barely knew which end of the thing to put on my face. She grinned up at Izumi with a snicker as her sister slid a pink satin blindfold over her eyes. Funny how times change. 

"Okay, everybody, let's hear it for our blushing bride!" Izumi spun her sister in her arms. "One!" 

The rest of the girls joined in as Ranko was spun again. "Two! THREE!" 

Okay, Ranko said, closing her eyes behind her blindfold. Center. See with your mind. Got it. She strode toward the poster with the same confidence her wife had, her dress flouncing around her knees as she walked. 

She stopped just in front of the poster. Ranko started to lean forward to kiss it, but then turned to her left, diving forward until her body crashed into another person. She leaned down, placing both of her hands on the woman's shoulders as she straddled her. Grinning, Ranko leaned down and kissed her on the lips, and a wave of relief washed over her when the girl she kissed responded. Either I got it right, or Hitomi's never gonna let me live this down, Ranko thought as she admitted her unseen partner's tongue into her mouth.

Her bridesmaids roared as Ranko peeled off her blindfold, snickering down at the pinned Akane after the lengthy kiss ended. "Your perfume's a dead giveaway. I'd know that scent anywhere, Akane!"

"Whoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop!" the other girls howled, as Yui hopped down from her stool to pour her little sister another shot.