Chapter 52

As the sun rises, the dim, strange pinks of twilight begin to transform into soft blue hues. However, the changing colors aren't enough to rouse Tiwa from his slumber and prepare him for the day ahead. The sky transitions into a brilliant blue, casting dappled sunlight overhead and illuminating Tiwa through the slit of the curtains, causing him to groan unconsciously in his sleep.

He blinks, opens his eyes, and reaches out to block the sunlight. The room feels warm and inviting, but he knows it's time to get up. Yawning and stretching his legs, he realizes they are tangled with another set of legs. A small smile forms on his lips as he leans back into Pravat's firm chest, but it fades away for no apparent reason. He doesn't know why...

An unknown emotion suddenly burns deep inside him and makes him feel like he's going to miss something or someone! He can't exactly guess what it is, but this feeling is something he has never experienced before. The mating mark on his neck itches badly, so he places his hand on his neck and soothes it gently until the owner of it shifts behind him.

"What is bothering my baby deer?" Pravat asks as he presses a kiss on Tiwa's shoulder and tightens his arm around him.

Tiwa doesn't know what to say as he struggles to figure it out, so he turns around and snuggles closer with his head pillowed on Pravat's shoulder. "Nothing," the word comes out easily, but not from his heart, as it's bleeding inside for something. He buries his face in Pravat's chest and feels him press a kiss to his hair and hold him tighter. It brings the stray tear that leaks out of his eyes.

Fear of getting caught, Tiwa wipes away the unsaid tears and pulls back to look at Pravat with soft and vulnerable eyes, feeling a longing settle in his heart once again. He wants a distraction, an escape from this feeling, so he mutters, "Scent me, please."

Pravat narrows his eyes; his face is serious as he can sense Tiwa's troubled emotions. Not wanting to press him with probing questions, he sits up and graces him with a gentle smile. "As you wish! Come here." He opens his arms and pulls him into his lap, wrapping him in a warm embrace.

He then takes one of Tiwa's hands and pulls down the sleeve of his shirt, licking a long strip from his wrist to his palm. "Do you feel good?" He gazes upon Tiwa with hooded eyes, fluttering eyelashes, and lips pressed to his skin as he speaks.

Tiwa shivers at the welcoming touch, feeling a rush of warmth spread through his body. "I feel good," he hums, bringing a small smile to his face with a sense of safety and connection from the closeness. "Just do it again. Please."

Pravat glances down, his expression soft and tender as he traces circles with his thumb on Tiwa's palm. It's good that Tiwa wishes for him to do it again. And again. Forever. On his wrists. His scent glands. In his center, where his scent is powerful. Pravat licks and licks, kisses, and nips on every skin he can reach. It's only a matter of time before Tiwa catches him, presses their lips together, and smiles against his mouth.

They pull away and lace their fingers together, looking down at their intertwined hands for a brief moment before bringing their knuckles up to kiss them while making eye contact. The odd, painful feeling closes its door in Tiwa's heart and lets him move on with Pravat together. Pravat gives a nod of understanding before initiating another kiss, causing Tiwa to feel a sense of calm wash over him.

Eventually, Tiwa lays his head on Pravat's chest, with his arm draped over him and a leg intertwined between them. Pravat pulls the blanket over them, wraps his arms around Tiwa, and runs his fingers through his hair gently. As they lay together, the world outside fades away, leaving only the two of them in their own little cocoon of comfort and love. Their peaceful moment is interrupted by a sharp knock at the door.

Tiwa raises his head, staring at the door with a racing heart, wondering who could be on the other side. Realizing that the source of his earlier fear is waiting outside, he looks back at Pravat and swallows hard, unsure of what to do. When Pravat begins to rise, Tiwa places a hand on his chest and stops him, feeling that he should be the one to confront whatever awaits them outside.

Giving Pravat's hand a firm squeeze, Tiwa moves to open the door and is met by Jaran standing on the other side. All thoughts go out the window as he stands, speechless. He doesn't even blink at the sight of him, feeling a sense of unease at the unusual encounter. Swallowing hard, he steps aside to let Jaran in, but his brother refuses and insists on speaking alone.

Tiwa looks over his shoulder at Pravat, considers for a moment, then nods at Jaran. He steps outside, closing the door behind him. At that exact moment, Jaran pulls him into his arms and cries into his shoulder while apologizing for his mistakes. Tiwa is stunned, struggling to find his own voice amidst the overwhelming emotions, as his hands remain clenched at his sides.

Jaran pulls back, guilt written all over his face as tears well up in his eyes, finally spilling over. It hits Tiwa then that this is reality, not a dream, and he feels his resolve weaken as tears cascade down his own cheeks. At that moment, all the weeks of distance and resentment vanish, replaced by a profound sense of forgiveness and understanding between them.

Jaran shakes his head and reaches out to wipe Tiwa's tears away, pleading, "Please, don't…"

Tiwa tries to compose himself, but he can't stop the tears from flowing. The weight of their shared pain hangs heavy in the air, a tangible reminder of the struggles they have faced together. He hopes everything will be fine in his life from now on. However, to disprove that thought, something happens next that turns his whole world upside down.

Jaran grabs Tiwa's hand and requests that he stay with him again. "Please, Tiwa. Forget everything and come with me!"

"B-Brother, I-I..." Tiwa pulls Jaran's hand off him and stays dumbfounded.

"Why? Can't you forgive your brother?" Jaran asks, tears streaming down his face. "I know I have made a terrible mistake, but please don't hate me," he begs, placing his hand on his chest. "Inside, I'm already suffering with a lifelong punishment for failing to protect you, so if you refuse to forgive me, I don't think I can live with the guilt. Please, Tiwa. Come with me!"

Tiwa tries to convince Jaran, "It's not your mistake, brother. Well, it is no one's mistake, so don't blame yourself," before reaching out and wiping his tears. Giving him a small smile to make him understand that he has no grudge against him. In fact, he is happy now that his brother finally realizes he is not a betrayer.

"How could I not blame myself when I was wrong?" Jaran raises his voice, making Tiwa flinch slightly. "You knew, Tiwa, that when Jirayu told me everything that had happened to you, I wished the floor would open up and take me. Because I didn't know how to face you and mend our broken relationship. Each time I think about it, some stupid thoughts get into my mind until a tiny part of my heart believes that you will understand me even if I fail to."

"B-Brother, I-I..." Tiwa tries to explain himself again, but Jaran interrupts him. "As he said, I understand him, but he doesn't."

"You don't need to say anything, Tiwa. I can understand, but my stupid heart doesn't. It still hangs onto the promise that you will be by my side forever." Jaran laughs pathetically and slaps his face when he realizes something. "Am I still deserving to talk about it?"

Tiwa shuts his eyes and lets out another fresh tear before drawing himself into a heartbroken decision. "I'll come with you." The words come out of his mouth, but there is no life. How can it be when his destined life is waiting for him inside?