French are pissed

"The shells are loaded! Shooting parameters confirmed! Ready to fire at any time!" a French artillery officer reported loudly to his superior. "The two artillery units are aimed at the large bunker on the main peak opposite the German position, while the other three have locked onto their respective targets."

"How is the field artillery group prepared?" the chief of the French Railway Artillery Corps inquired, glancing into the distance.

The officer immediately presented a document: "A few minutes ago, they reached the designated location. Along with our cannon, 60 artillery pieces will fire, which will surely devastate the Germans' Siegfried Line."

Nodding, the commander of the railroad artillery ordered, "Start the timer; action time is 7 minutes after mission instructions. Fire on schedule and coordinate with our forces to breach the Siegfried Line."

"Yes, sir!" the subordinate officer affirmed.

At that moment, in the field headquarters dug out on the hill closest to the German border, Charles de Gaulle surveyed the Siegfried Line across Germany through his binoculars. In the bushes, the cement walls of German bunkers peeked through; in strategic positions, these were dotted with machine gun ports. Though camouflaged with weeds, the dark barrels of guns were still visible.

Yet, a nagging feeling of unease lingered in his heart, a premonition of deception casting a shadow over his thoughts. He lowered his binoculars and addressed his adjutant and staff, "Despite the clever construction of the German defenses, they exhibit numerous vulnerabilities."

He pointed to the opposite hill, "They seem to prefer deploying machine gun and artillery bunkers, yet they've neglected to install anti-tank obstacles and barbed wire at the forefront, which is quite peculiar."

"General Charles de Gaulle, the Germans have always been short on resources like steel, so they are hesitant to waste precious steel on barbed wire and tank obstacles. This is the intelligence department's analysis, and it's quite convincing," one staff member replied with a smile.

"We also lack steel," Charles de Gaulle retorted, dismissing the explanation. "In less critical areas of the Maginot Line, we've seen effective use of wooden anti-tank obstacles. Why then haven't the Germans laid simple anti-tank barriers in such a suitable area for tank attacks?"

"General, perhaps they are leaving a gap for their tanks to launch an offensive," his deputy suggested after some thought. "There is information that the Germans have laid extensive minefields elsewhere, possibly preferring mines over physical barriers for tank defense."

"Has anyone actually seen the Germans laying these mines?" de Gaulle asked, his brow furrowed.

"No, but our scouts have spotted numerous minefield warning signs," the adjutant replied, somewhat uncertain. "Perhaps the mines were buried at night..."

"It's too late for speculations now. We must engage and adapt our battle plans accordingly," de Gaulle sighed. "Victory has made us overlook the scars of war. While the Germans fight fiercely, our officers worry about vacations. I've formed an armored force on the second line, yet they haven't been to the frontline in over six months. You haven't even properly scouted the enemy's defenses."

Meanwhile, on the German side, beneath the guise of a formidable artillery position, two fat rats mated undisturbed. Nearby, what appeared to be a substantial reinforced concrete construction was merely a facade; the machine gun ports were nothing more than crudely dug holes, mostly inhabited by rodents. The supposed gun barrels were in fact damaged mop handles, discarded bicycle frames, or even broken flutes. The alleged minefields were marked only by signs, with very few actual mines buried.

The entire Siegfried Line was a grand deception. When this carefully orchestrated sham was questioned, all doubts were swiftly silenced. Even when a French businessman reported seeing fake German positions, he was arrested by the French, accused of aiding German propaganda.

The French government had even interpreted their president's description of the Siegfied Line as "insubstantial," considering it a modest understatement. They believed their Maginot Line could withstand the German assault for at least half a year.

However, the Germans were far from unprepared. Following their campaign in Poland, they had redirected about half of their Eastern Front air forces to the Western Front. On the dawn of September 30, the Luftwaffe's western airfields housed 1,970 fighter jets, vastly outnumbering the French. These included advanced Fw-190D fighters, far superior to any aircraft the French could deploy. Additionally, numerous bomber units were poised to cripple the French ground forces, disrupt supply lines, and buy time for a counterattack.

On the ground, General Lundstedt commanded 800,000 troops, equipped with dated but effective weapons like the third assault gun and second tank, as well as numerous anti-tank guns and Panzerfaust rocket launchers. Behind these front-line troops, world-renowned tank divisions, including Rommel's 7th Armored Corps and the 2nd Armored Corps led by General Balkenf, were rapidly advancing by train as reserve forces. These units, synonymous with victory, had secured Poland in just 16 days.

Moreover, Germany was mobilizing reserve forces as ordered by the head of state, aiming to expand the army from 3 million in 1938 to 4.5 million by 1939.

"Open fire!" commanded the French artillery chief on September 30. With that, French artillery unleashed a deafening barrage, bombarding the so-called German defenses. Heavy railway artillery launched lethal shells, followed by a sustained bombardment from various calibers of field artillery. The earth shook with the impact, scattering soil and gravel.

"This is the second observation post! The Germans have not responded!" a French artillery observer reported via walkie-talkie. Similar reports came from other posts.

As hundreds of French fighter planes dominated the skies, French bombers descended, ready to drop their payloads on German positions and obliterate the Siegfried Line.

Before the artillery ceased, French infantry advanced cautiously, navigating through areas marked as minefields. Though some fell to mines, most reached the German positions unscathed. They shouted slogans, expecting German counterfire that never came.

"Cease fire! Our troops are attacking! Stop firing!" an officer at the observation post urgently communicated via walkie-talkie. After more than ten minutes, the artillery fell silent, and the landscape returned to a deceptive calm, marked only by craters and lingering smoke.

"Could this be a drill?" wondered a French battalion commander, puzzled by the lack of resistance. He gestured toward the bunkers, expecting them to unleash deadly fire.

Of course, the Germans were not dead. French infantry cautiously approached the bunkers, only to find no entrances. When they returned with mop handles and rusty pipes instead of weapons, it became clear: the French had been duped.

"Get the tanks moving! We've been tricked by those damn Germans!" De Gaulle barked into the phone, furious. "Cross into Germany, advance ten kilometers, and engage any resistance!"