NORMANI

The hotel was one in a million. It wasn't five star or anything but it was a dream place. We'd spent a day already and it has been perfect so far. I couldn't stop sending Emily grateful messages for the tickets and paying for the resort. This was the happiest I had ever seen my kids. Immediately we landed the previous evening, they spent the better part of it playing on the beach building sand houses and playing hide and seek.

I sighed watching the twins sleep so peacefully, grateful I didn't go with my plan to remove them when I found out I was pregnant. I was scared and alone and my father and brother were so disappointed so I made the decision to do what was right at the time. The day I was to go pay for the process in a mid wife's home, Emily overworked me. She wasn't my friend at the time so there was no way she would have possibly known what I was going to do. When she finally released me to go home, she asked for a ride in my car. We got stuck in traffic for over an hour. I saw everything as a sign and that was when I cracked and told her everything because I so desperately needed someone to talk to. Larissa had traveled abroad for a work trip. Emily did what any sensible woman would do, she persuaded me not to go ahead with it. And because my mother believed in signs from above, I didn't do it. How lucky I was because these children were the best thing that ever happened to me.

Delanie woke up with a sneeze. I quickly rushed to her side. "Are you okay baby?"

"No."

Panic immediately welled up in my chest. "What's wrong, baby? Where hurts?"

"Pasta, mommy. I want pasta." a mischievous grin appeared on her face reminding me of her father when he was up-to no good.

"You silly child. Alright wake your brother up so we can go for lunch."

"Yay." she bounced on the bed. Dillan woke up already from her bouncing. I got them dressed under ten minutes and with the help of Google, we arrived at a restaurant the hotel receptionist told me about. While the twins went for Melanza alla parmigiana, I went for the Arugula salad with filet mignon. I had heard from other guests at the resort that the restaurant served the best dishes. Taking a fork of my food, I realized they didn't lie. The kids ate theirs like it was Christmas morning.

Suddenly, I felt a chill air on my neck. I had a feeling of deja vu. It was as though my spirit sensed him around here but even I knew it couldn't be true. He valued his work more than journeying, besides, he was married now and his good ol' wife loved the city of Calabasas. But still, I felt that warmth deep down in my belly even though I felt so chilly on the outside. I needed to go to the bathroom so I begged one of the waitress to help me watch the kids while I was gone.

In the bathroom, I heard two people having sex in one of the stalls. I was mortified! It made me so mad because they were so loud, not caring at all if children could be in here.

"Give it to me, By. Harder, please." I heard the lady say. She sounded so young yet so reckless.

"Scream for me." the voice urged in a low yet extremely seductive tone. Okay I was going crazy. I was conjuring voices in my head all because I dared to think of him again. That voice sounded like Byron's. Exactly like his.

That was what I got for thinking about him. I hurriedly made my way out of the bathroom and straight to the management to report whoever it was. The manager was horrified, though he gave me a discount on my meal. As I walked out of the restaurant, I felt guilty. Very guilty and bad. I had fucked Byron in a public bathroom before so why was I suddenly being all prim and proper? Could it be possible it had to do with the fact I hadn't had sex since I took in for the twins? Thinking about sex made me so horny. I really needed to get laid. But being a single mother was so hard, I barely had time for myself not to mention having a boyfriend or having random sex. I had to be a good example to my children, besides, I had a whole truck of worry to bother about sex, but, hearing that young lady getting it in that bathroom made me so horny. Worst part was, it made me think of Byron.

Shit. I muttered a low swear. Why now? Why was he always on my mind? Even though he had never left.

The kids and I held hands, walking to the beach. The Google map showed me a beach close to where we were so we followed the map.

"Mommy?" Delanie called out to me kicking the air.

"Yes, Princess....?"

"When am I getting a daddy? I want a daddy." like I was struck by lightning, my steps faltered as I stood there, frozen. That was the last thing I expected coming out of my daughter's mouth.

Dillan nudged her shoulder. "We don't need a daddy. I can protect us and beat up the bad guys. Right, mommy?" that unfroze me. I bursted into fits of laughter. He cracked me up real good even though what I really wanted to do was cry.

"Yes baby. You can protect us, but for now, let me do the protecting okay?" He nodded.

"So when do I get a daddy?" she pushed.

"Daddies are not gotten, little one. Everyone has a particular, special daddy made for them."

“Oh” she said, her face scrunched up like she was deep in thought. "So where is my daddy?" I was close to face palming myself. How did my little girl get so smart? That wasn't a conversation we were supposed to be having now. I thought this would wait until they were teenagers or something.

"I will tell you when you're much older."

"Promise?" she removed her hand from mine and held out her pinky to me. I laced mine with hers and nodded, "Promise."

Dillan laughed. “You’re silly, Delanie. That’s what parents always say whenever they don’t want to tell their kids something.”

My eyes widened. “Where did you get that from? That’s not true. We say that when we know you’re too little to understand.”

He shrugged like he didn’t care about my explanation, he already knew his truth. “Whatever you say, mommy.”

It was turning out to be quite a fucking day. I needed a drink so bad. Something strong. Really strong. As we passed, people stared at them, some blessed them with a smile, and some greeted and stopped to play with them a little, while others just looked. There was no denying that the twins were magnificently created. There was no mistake neither were there any fault in them. God really took his time in creating them. They took their father's gene because he was one handsome hunk. My kids were beyond beautiful.

When we finally got to the beach, they ran to go start building another sand house. I was grateful for the break because I needed to speak to my friends alone. As soon as I secured a spot where I had my privacy and at the same time I could keep my eyes on the kids, I called Larissa but she didn’t pick up so I called Emily. She picked on the third ring.

"What's up girlfriend?" she asked. Lovely as always. I on the other hand, skipped all the formalities and went straight to the point. I told her about the bathroom incident and how I was so turned on that I started imagining and hearing Byron's voice.

"Wow, girl, you sure had an adventure. Could it be you've started thinking about Byron because you miss him?"

"But why now? I have not allowed myself the luxury of thinking about him all these years to avoid missing him. Though sometimes I can't help but wonder, is he fine, does he think about me too? But still, the hatred I carry inside is still strong as hell. And now I'm so horny." I pouted.

She laughed. "I have an idea. There's a nightcare building for kids three buildings away from your resort. You can keep the kids there tonight while you go out and get you some."

I shook my head even though she couldn't see me. “That's a very bad idea. I can not leave my kids just to go have random sex. No way. Besides where will i find a guy?" I was getting frustrated…. Sexually frustrated.

“I have that covered. You need to relax, Norma. Live a little."

"I will think about it." my eyes moved to where the kids were playing but they weren't alone anymore. There was a lady with them.

"Mommy, look we found a friend." Delanie called out to me.