Jonin’s Choice
Hentai Shinobi Rule 59: A master Hentai Shinobi instead anticipates NNN (Non-Stop Nutting November.) (Credits to @Nuugis)
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For what it's worth, Konohagakure was a spacious settlement. Or rather, its population was modest at best. That's what one would expect from a hidden Shinobi Village. Most of the vendors were either the descendants of the previous Shinobi who chose to live a life of peace and prosperity, well-connected merchants from the Capital and other Civilian Noble Clans, or the offsprings of the original traders and artisans that migrated during Konoha's creation.
One benefit of the less dense population, aside from administrative control that had blown to shit after Uzu's fall, was the readily available property designed to further a Shinobi's skills, namely, the Training Grounds. Most Clans within the village had one or two training grounds within their Compounds. However, even more existed outside those private properties.
Again, most of these training grounds were often rented to other parties within the village for the administration's treasury. Several training grounds saw more actions in celebrations than a Shinobi inventing groundbreaking Jutsu or raising the future generation into a deadly blade meant to be commanded as the Hokage saw fit.
However, today, two notable figures gathered near a unique location enclosed by a metal fence. Despite the harshening autumn's cold, it boasted a thick, lush jungle that refused to dry up yellow. With enough concentration, an ordinary civilian would hear echoes of desolate howls emerge from the jungle's center.
Training Ground 44.
The Forest of Death.
"I don't buy it," Kai ignored the warning signs on the fence, cautioning any errand idiot about entering the controlled death ground. "Anyone who dies inside it never deserved to be a shinobi. You should toss the rest of the team inside for a week for training, Sensei."
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Tsunade rolled her eyes. "I'd let you do that to your team once you're old enough to teach someone."
Kai looked at the barely lit sky and sighed.
"Tsunade-Sensei… I'm already old enough."
Hey, Ameyuri believed him. There was a chance Tsunade might just—
"And I'm the next Rikudo," she snickered.
Forget it.
Kai decided to focus his energy on Ameyuri instead. The good thing about forming a Harem was that he might never run out of goals… unless it became too troublesome.
"So?" Kai looked around. He noticed nobody else.
"Where's the audience?"
Tsunade hummed before exhaling.
"Your objective is to enter the Forest of Death, locate your opponent, snatch the scroll he's hidden, and report to the central tower inside the Training Ground. Everyone is already waiting for you and will keep an eye on your performance."
"Everyone?" Kai blinked. "Who—"
*Poof*
Tsunade disappeared into a plume of smoke, being the shadow clone she was.
'Son of a bitch…' Kai huffed before glancing at his mission panel.
[Promotion Quest: Performance Evaluation
Summary: Collect the hidden scroll from your opponent and report to the central tower.
Rewards: 5 SP; New Title(s); New Skill Tree(s)
Failure: Chance of Host's promotion suspended; A Chance of admission into Anbu or Root; New Title; New Skill Tree]
Despite his demeanor, Kai took the promotion seriously. He ignored the entrance he stood in front of and walked around the perimeter. The training ground had 44 entrances, each spaced equally.
'All of them are booby-trapped…' Kai soon realized it, indicating that he'd been taken for a chump. If the entrances alone boasted such traps, he didn't need to be a chaotic hobgoblin to understand the dangers in the forest.
The Training Ground was also known for its deadly fauna, with several over-sized creatures roaming and breeding like there was no tomorrow.
'Oh, well.'
Kai stepped against one of the entrances, observing the discreet string attached to one of the several tiny holes.
'So, a slightly more disturbance will set off the trap and alert the individual inside.' Kai glanced at the spot above the fence. Any shinobi could just jump and cover the region without disturbing anything. However, the other party must have thought the same. So? Why would they still create this trap?
'Mind games?' Kai mused before rejecting the idea. His opponent was known for ruthlessness, not a playful demeanor suggesting joy in playing with the prey.
Kai furrowed his brows and released a pulse of chakra to scout his immediate vicinity when he discovered another mesh of strings invisible to the naked eye stretching across the fence and covering the Forest of Death in a dome.
'Huh, so that was why dangerous birds from the forest don't just fly away and create more orphans… a dome of chakra strings supplied by a Fuinjutsu designed for the Training Ground's need.'
Chakra Strings were notorious in a Suna Shinobi's hands and weren't inherently sticky. However, the basic properties of chakras are known to every academy student—sticking, flowing, and dissipating.
Mastering chakra control meant mastering these three properties.
Academy students are taught to master the sticking aspect, and later, they learn to control its flow before conserving their reserves during battle by inhibiting the unnecessary loss of excess chakra dissipating in their surroundings.
Advanced practitioners could employ such aspects as they wished. For instance, the dome of chakra strings was sticky on one side, not the outer surface, allowing others to enter it but not leave the region as they please.
'Since I'm the last to enter…'
Kai pursed his lips and flickered to appear atop the fence the next moment.
He pressed his hand against the surface of the invisible dome—
'Yeah, they rigged it to stick from the outside the second Sensei entered the forest,' He muttered a curse in annoyance under his breath before smirking.
'They're gonna evaluate me from the get-go, right? So, I need to be bombastic from the beginning!'
<<<>>>
"Did I miss something?" Tsunade questioned as her form reappeared in one of the rooms capable of surveilling the forest within the central tower. She expertly hid the surge of complicated feelings after meeting Orochimaru's gaze as her former teammates glanced in her direction after she announced her arrival.
"Oh, Tsunade!" Jiraiya grinned back. "Nothing much. Kai's scouting the entrance and found out the traps."
She nodded at the duo before plopping down on the couch shared by the duo.
"Woah!" Jiraiya suddenly gasped. "Did something happen between you two?"
"Eh?" Tsunade blinked. "No?"
"Then why am I in the middle?" Jiraiya voiced his curiosity. "It's usually Orochi in the middle with you sitting beside him… not sure why you avoid me—"
Tsunade suddenly jabbed at his chest as the white-haired Jonin broke into a cold sweat. "Okay, maybe I do. But, hey! I learned my lesson—don't try touching Tsunade. Heck! I even promoted the idea to every guy I came across!"
The blonde Senju's nostrils flared as she grabbed Jiraiya's collars.
"You're why no guy wants to go out with me?!"
"No?" He squeaked. "It's your anger—" Jiraiya wisely shut up after noticing how his wisdomous words would impress upon Tsunade.
"Whatever," she scoffed and stood up before walking over to Orochimaru's side, demanding dryly, "Scooch."
"Sure," Orochimaru shrugged with a smile.
'This asshole!' The corner of Tsunade's right eye twitched. 'Bastard acts like he can just solve anything on his own!'
She sat down with a soft scoff, ignoring Jiraiya's aggrieved look.
"I was joking, Tsunade… come on, you can sit beside me."
"Nope," she snorted. "I gave you a shot." Tsunade leaned back and watched the displayed view of Kai and his immediate vicinity alongside another shot of his opponent relaxing on a distant tree.
Jiraiya didn't continue but shot the duo another pensive look before something attracted his attention.
"Eh?" Tsunade leaned forward, shock twisting her expression.
Orochimaru's snake-like slits widened in surprise.
"Phew~!" Jiraiya whistled in amazement. "I thought you hadn't taught your team that Jutsu."
Tsunade's voice crackled with annoyance.
"I haven't. It's…" Her words further stumped her friends. "... probably the first time he's trying it."
Meanwhile, in a room on a lower floor equipped with similar seals to view and evaluate the match, influential individuals sat peculiarly intrigued by either the match's result or how the two parties would confront each other. Among them, the most notable wasn't the Third Hokage, who wore his usual white haori, the full-length red kimono, and the customary hat with the 'fire' kanji embroidered atop. Alongside him sat the council members.
While Hebi Hyuga's addition, alongside his two prodigious sons, should have roused enough tension in the air, they all sat quietly without feeling the urge to raise political conflicts in the presence of the kind-looking redhead.
"Bah! Look at how you have others fooled!" Raged the Kyubi within, its voice as gruff and scratchy as expected from a giant furball of destruction.
'And?' Mito scoffed internally. 'I wasn't the only deceptive one back then.'
"You sealed me, bitch!"
'You said, and I fucking quote—Try conquering me, human, for I hold the secrets to Rikudo! What was I supposed to do but NOT seal you. I can't take you out with just my chains.'
"YOU SEALED ME!"
'Shove it. It was a fair fight.'
"Fair? FAIR?! Fairness shit itself to death the second that damn Uchiha controlled my mind and used me as a shield against your pathetic Uchiha 'Stabber.' You could only seal me because I was weakened by that battle!"
'Sounds like a 'you' issue.'
"I'm going to eat you!"
Mito ignored the rude company for the polite one and glanced at Hebi, who stiffened as her gaze landed on him.
"I heard Kai decided to own up to his actions and apologize to you and your beautiful daughter-in-law, Hyuga-kun. I hope everything went well."
Hebi's lips twitched. But what could he do?
Mito Uzumaki was a living martyr who took it upon herself to seal the Nine-Tailed Beast for the greater good without thinking twice. Now, on her deathbed, she had gained massive favor from everyone for her previous actions, making her as popular and famous as Lord Third and his former teammates, if not more.
"Your ward was," Hebi cleared his throat. "Adequate."
"I see," Mito's smile widened, almost forcing her already weary eyes to shut. "That's pleasant." She suddenly entered a coughing fit, making everyone worried.
Exhaling, she shook her head. "It's fine, everyone."
"Yeah. This bitch isn't gonna leave anytime soon and just got an itchy throat after having it plugged and slathered by that other asshole's splooge!"
'You should show Kai some compassion,' Mito scoffed at the furball. 'He's the only one I've seen ever taking your side… like ever.'
They recalled when Kai raged and cursed Mito for the fate she cursed Kushina with.
"Hm?" Hiruzen exhaled with surprise.
"Is that…" One of the twins sitting beside Hebi narrowed his eyes.
"Outstanding talent," Homura muttered under his breath.
Hiruzen and Mito didn't appear surprised due to the things they already knew.
<<<>>>
[Chakra Scalpel (A) (1/10): A feat of chakra control that manipulates its three aspects into achieving a precise cutting force capable of bypassing most material and chakra-enhanced obstructions. Mastering this Jutsu allows the host to utilize it even in the most strenuous combat circumstances without losing focus. Increases Chakra Control by 1% at every level {If Chakra Control<100.}
Next Level: Continuously use the Jutsu 0/90 minutes or 29 SP.
Skill Tree Evolution: Shape Manipulation (B) (0/100.)]
[Shape Manipulation (B) (0/100) (Locked)
Unlocking Conditions: 12 SP; 375 Chakra; 375 Perception; Mastered Skill: Shape Transformation (C)]
The usually invisible chakra condensed into a brilliant but fluctuating pattern similar to a bluish fire lick around Kai's right hand as he concentrated on the mass before adopting a surprising control. While achieving the Jutsu's utilization wasn't out of Kai's grasp, he could only display such mastery from the beginning due to his unique circumstances.
First, he had mastered Shape Transformation and could effortlessly manipulate his reserves into several intricate structures. Additionally, he possessed a few unique skills no worse than any Kekkei Genkai regarding practical measures, which permanently boosted his ability to understand Chakra and its mysteries.
However, [Chakra Scalpel] introduced a new factor to [Shape Transformation,] namely, an effect.
Just because Kai could construct a gun from the Chakra did not mean it was either metallic or could shoot. For instance, the Chakra Strings. Yes, they looked like strings, but their inherent qualities did not change.
Meanwhile, [Shape Manipulation] introduced the aspect of an 'effect' to the transformed shapes. Unfortunately, Kai's raw stats were far too lacking to unlock the skill. Again, he could practice the technique without needing the skill, but it was more efficient to work and everything he could to get those juicy additions to his stats by advancing his skills. After all, he needed every bit of unfair advantage to close the gap between chakra monsters crawling the face of the continent.
As for [Chakra Scalpel?] It introduced a precise cutting force to the flowy chakra condensed around his hand. Of course, it needed the utmost concentration to achieve that cutting force. So, using it in battle currently was a child's dream…
But a child can dream, right?
Kai snickered at his humor because nobody else was present before slicing away the mesh of chakra strings to create an entrance.
As for readjusting the fuinjutsu around the Forest of Death to keep the wildlife from escaping?
'Well, that's not my problem.' Kai shrugged internally and entered the premises. There was an instant atmosphere shift, as the air was no longer dry and cold. Instead, it was cold and damp, like the entire forest was that one wet leaf layered with dew at the brink of dawn.
The wet ground created a sloppy sticking noise every time Kai walked, and the lush foliage around him oozed a fresh scent.
The youth couldn't help but scrunch his nose. [Transparent World] was a nifty, unique skill that modified Kai's body to momentarily 'connect' his five senses and enhance them by an outstanding degree to achieve incredulous effects like visualizing the target's innards! However, the addition of such overpowering fresh scent…
Kai paused and plucked the nearest leaf.
He rubbed the leaf between his thumb and curled index finger before realizing that the 'dew' was something artificial…
'The entire forest is purposely marked with this scent,' Kai thinned his lips. He didn't know the scent's purpose but understood that every trap was geared to become an obstruction.
'I also cannot use that cheap method of sensing others. It's the same as exposing my immediate vicinity. Furthermore, that man prepared a lot. It stands to reason he must have inquired about me from Lord Third… He likely knows about my Fuinjutsu to detect other sensors when they scout my location. Why else do I not feel a similar pulse of chakra or other unorthodox sensing measures?'
The [Two Symbols Protection] was incredible to the point Kai could even sense when someone like Mito tried to gauge his emotions. However, it was a reactionary skill and played a passive role. Knowing the Fuinjutsu's function was already a good measure of avoiding and countering it.
'Not to mention that dude's got a disastrous body count way beyond Ameyuri…' Kai clicked his teeth and explored the forest at a modest pace, not too hurried since that might expose any unintended weakness.
'The objective is to find the scroll, not to win. Even if I miraculously defeat the target, how do I extract the information?'
The good 'ol tickling?
'Nah.' Kai shook his head. It might have worked on Ameyuri, but he didn't want to witness another grown man piss himself while laughing.
So? Massage the information out?
Again, Kai didn't want to be the reason for another man's pleasure.
'But cutting toes is so boring…' Kai's shoulders slumped as he neared the river cutting through the forest.
He suddenly stopped.
'Something just scouted my position.' Kai glanced in the detected direction with eyes narrowed in suspicion. 'What's going on? Did that Bogeyman not do his homework?'
It smelled like a trap…
But it was also Kai's only clue.
Sometimes, taking the bait was just as important as mastering it.
Kai had already master-baited long ago.
*Flicker*
Kai disappeared from his spot and appeared on a distant branch—
"Hello."
The youth faced another man in his prime, greeting him with a wave and a smile.
Kai couldn't help but glimpse.
Kai's opponent boasted an inherently kind face, spiky white hair tied with a band, and a set of dark eyes with deep lines running beneath the eyebags, indicating the accumulated weariness. On his back was a sheathe strapped diagonally for a sword perhaps more famous than its wielder due to the white glow it released when slashed—The White Light Chakra Saber.
Konoha's White Fang.
Sakumo Hatake.
Kai's heartbeat accelerated as he tried to understand the situation when Sakumo chuckled and tossed something to the former.
*Thck*
Kai caught the… scroll.
"What's the catch?" Kai inquired with a frown.
"The catch?" Sakumo tilted his head. "You have the scroll, Kai. Don't you want to become a Jonin? That scroll is your mission, remember?"
Kai's frown deepened further.
Sakumo couldn't help but exhale after noticing Kai unmoved.
"Now, why would a Jonin question how he completes his mission?" The man inquired. "You might feel something amiss—"
Kai suddenly formed a seal.
"It's not a genjutsu," Sakumo smiled. "But it's nice to know that Genjutsu can slip through the Fuinjutsu guarding you."
"You'll need more than a Genjutsu to take me down," Kai replied mockingly. "Though, I can't fault you. Whatever you heard about me must have spooked you enough to give up."
"Give up?" The White Fang blinked.
"It means to lose your motivation to perform anything meaningful."
"I know what it means," Sakumo crossed his arms. "I taught that lesson to plenty of opponents. They call me the Suna Pick-Up because most Suna Shinobi give up when they see me!"
The man puffed his chest. "Get it?"
Kai's lips tugged down with disgust.
"I'm taking the scroll. Thanks, I guess."
"W-Wait!" Sakumo cleared his throat. "Don't you want to know why I gave you the scroll?"
"Don't care," Kai shrugged and turned around—
*Poof* *Poof*
"Kai-chan!"
"Kai!"
Two familiar voices froze Kai in his steps as he steadily turned back. The color drained from his face slightly when he saw Kushina and Mikoto tied and seated upon an unfurled sealing scroll. Before they could speak further, Sakumo formed a seal and caused the rope to slip against their lips, gagging them as their eyes widened with fear.
"Hey!" Kai snapped when his opponent drew the saber against Kushina's face with practiced ease.
Sakumo continued with a smile.
"You have the scroll and can complete the mission. It would take you a few seconds to do that, and while I cannot kill your teammates, I will surely traumatize their bodies with pain and poison I picked from the border we share with our sandy friends."
Kai clenched the scroll before grinning.
"You think I'd fall for that? I met Kushina before leaving the residence. That's not my Kushina."
"Then you have no problem if I do this?" Sakumo smirked and dragged a tiny slit against the terrified redhead's face, causing a minuscule stream of blood to flow down.
The tied duo struggled as Kai snorted.
"Lord Third would never let you hurt them," Kai argued.
"Is that so?" Sakumo shrugged. "Then leave."
But Kai couldn't leave. The fact that the bound 'imposter' bled meant it wasn't a Shadow Clone and had a reasonable chance of being Kushina and Mikoto. Additionally… he was being watched by the higher-ups. The fact they didn't jump Sakumo's ass until now meant he either had permission to capture Team 9's glorious cheek globbers or these were individuals using the Transformation Jutsu, most likely through a Fuinjutsu because Kai couldn't sense any chakra on their skins…
"A Jonin who cannot prioritize the mission is no true Shinobi," Sakumo's grave words echoed in the silent forest as Kai's fingers almost sank and tore the scroll apart.
Still, Kai remembered why he wanted to become a Jonin.
So, his gaze squared upon the bound duo.
"If you two ARE Kushina and Mikoto… sorry. But rest assured, I'll treat you an additional bowl of ramen or dango for every injury."
*Fwip*
Kai disappeared, leaving Sakumo slack-jawed. Even Kushina and Mikoto's eyes widened before profound sadness, and a tinge of complicated pride flickered within their orbs.
***
Alternate Title: Sakumo's Subtle Foreshadowing; The Forest of Death; Training Ground 44; The Evaluation Begins; Promotion Quest; The Audience; Booby Traps; Entering With Style; Jiraiya Took The L; Also Jiraiya: Instantly Noticing The Issues In His Friend Group; Orochimaru: Exists (Tsunade: Oh? Are You Looking Down On Me?); Tsunade: I Tortured Someone For You! (Orochimaru: Really? Lol. I Would Do That For Fun); Kai When He Hits Early 20s: Sensei, I'm Old Enough; The One Try Man; Scalpel; Precise Entrance; The Sticky Dome; Doflamingo Laughing Noise; The Bird Cage; Mito And Her Banters; New Lore Drop; Kyubi Got a Friend In Kai—Both Wanna Fuck Mito; Mito: Exists (Kyubi: Curse Your Degenerate Existence); The Hyuga Gaze; The Scented Forest; Sakumo Hatake; The Scroll; The Journey Of Dad Jokes Starts From The Very First One; The Bound Team; Kai: Aight (Disappears)
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