THE MAN

I live at the edge of the city, to get its life but also the silence and quietness of the suburb too, just how I like it, I realized. The neighbors were neither too noisy nor nosey yet they were, always are in a way. It is a short drive from the main road before entering the high gates with well-manicured edges of Green Hedges. I drive to the underground park which is apparently empty. I get it; the slow evening traffic, hanging out or catching up, and most offices close at five o'clock and it's still a freaking Friday. Getting out of Van, not leaving with her anytime soon, I head to the doors of the Nyumbani building, key chain dangling from my fingers. The security guard is on point as always, it's a pity I don't know their names because they are never consistent and I think management did handle that well. Saying hi and heading into the lift, thank God there is no silly lift music today. 

The lift doors open and the corridors are empty no living soul or music from any of the apartments on my floor. The reason I love this place, but when they decide to have house parties it's not hell but not lovely either, more so when you need peace at the moment. The constant loud music waves, every now and then when their door opens, and the uncoordinated high-pitched laughter and conversations in the corridor can be outrageous. Though these are the signs you live among people, there is life beyond your four walls; the freedom of just being but for now as I walk down the empty corridor towards my apartment, I can't help but appreciate the stillness.

There are days that I decide to visit Nyumbani's facilities and take advantage of what it offers but change my mind. There is the gym, not that I will ever find myself there, but it's good to know where it is just in case; if one wants to go shopping; there is a whole collection of bodies, you can have a pick, and the choice is all yours depending on how you swing. It is just like a bar but with better choices and you seeing what you getting, pure merchandise not that you paying, or you might, it depends. Then there is a yoga studio which I was always planning to visit and check out their schedule but never been able to make it. If they had one during the late evenings it would be the best for me, to let the day's excitement out, all that anger, frustration, desperation, before it turned into depression. Although I just pass it along, all the time, something better always comes up or I get too lazy. I knew there was a vet office somewhere not that I had a pet or intended to; and the private clinic, that I knew, emergencies happen all the time.

It has been two years since I bought the apartment after I saw the overview online a week after the building was opened up. It's not a skyscraper but the view from my appartment is good enough. After checking it personally, it's lighting system okay, the water is always on the flow, and security is tight enough. The interior design and spacious rooms did it for me. Nobody could figure for themselves that I live in this place. Everyone has a different perspective of me, and their judgments and gaps fill, this is far too much for their vivid imagination or build-ups. Safe from prying eyes, non-busybodies, crappy talk, shitty people to get involved with. I made this my home now, a place that is uniquely mine, a space that reflects my own personality and tastes, and a hideout. 

I sink into the comfort of my sofa, closing my eyes and letting the tranquility wash over me. In this moment, I am content. I am at peace. And I am grateful for the solitude that allows me to recharge and rejuvenate, ready to face whatever the world may throw my way.

Walking to the door, the echo of my steps the only sound heard. Unlocking the door with a click, finally am home, my safe haven. Shoes off, placing them on the rack at the end of the hallway on my left and my feet meet the cold floor. I love how the floor feels after a long day cramped in shoes, it's like massaging my feet with non-melting ice. Dropping my belongings on the work table, picking the remote, TV on, stereo on, music playing silently in the background, a routine. My playlist is always dope, that is what I tell myself, developing and updating; listening to new people daily, them sharing their thoughts, ideas, emotions, opinions, stories. You can be amazed at how much songs impact. It kind of knows what I want to listen to and when. There is nothing important on the TV set and I don't feel like scrolling at the moment. I strip as I walk to the bedroom to freshen up a bit and get out of my day's outfit.

Swapping the suit with shorts, oversized light promotion tee on, a long story behind this one, I walk to the sink, scrubbing the make-up off my face bare and cleaned up. Head out to the kitchen, and Celine Dion's Imperfections is playing. It has been on my playlist's repeat since it was released. Taking out some meatball sauce leftovers I had yesterday with rice, I wanted to mash them up with spaghetti. The easiest meal to cook and fast, not that am lazy, it's my to-go meal, apart from fries of course. Within a few minutes, my meal is done, a glass of milk and pieces of apples aside. I carry the food to the living space to catch up on some episodes of some series while I munch. Forty minutes elapse too quickly, my plate is empty, my stomach full and it's almost seven. The sun is waning off, beautiful to watch but it won't be long before it disappears completely. Need to get ready and going. 

An hour from now I will be set. I don't know if I should pimp myself out? Will he judge with the first impression, will it change his mind and go away, bother me no more, or it will do nothing? Let me give it a try and see how the night unfolds. Hoping taxi functions in every part of the city in case it's a dump am heading to.

 ******************

Black is the way to go, just to blend in with the darkness around you, or maybe a hideout in the night crowd. Black knee-length boot heels with enough straps to glue your eyes on, I wore them for a purpose of course. Tight short black dress for lure, how much can be split because of this slit from his tight lips? Leaving a gap between the leather and where the straps end, enough for a large palm to caress or invite one to skim through. A mysterious kind of look pulled out from head to toe. I had no armor to protect me from him apart from this look that keeps you guessing, wanting; desire.

Rahim decided to send a location instead and that suited me, the venue is on the fourth floor of an array of business buildings. The foyer is a bit empty, the neon lights blinking signs. Glad it's a real uptown club and bar, nevertheless, you can't know an establishment well enough for its secrets and the kind of people who operate it. I didn't know what to really expect, much more like a blind date perhaps, because am blinded certainly by his motives, and reasons, everything about him is blindsiding.

To my left is an open kitchen, adjoining the restaurant that was playing silent soothing music in the background of the chatter and clutter. On the other side welcoming me in was a new wave of banging, blasting in full mode music that was coming from the club. Heading to the door, looking around for my first stop; straight to the bar. My nerves are eating me alive, not what I expected of a club, the structure of this place is really cool. The designers, architects, the interior, colors, and makeover seem to fit.

I head straight for the bar in case he is here already and I order a neat double-shot whiskey before I start to pretend drinking the girlie stuff. After drowning it in a few gulps, feeling the burn down my throat it seemed weird to hang out on the counter. He hasn't confirmed if he is here yet or not, looking around I don't seem to see him. I find my way to a secure table, where I can see everything that goes on from my point of view, and try to call him, and make sure there is a bit of a respectable audience around me if drama breaks off, which I was betting against all odds.

I sit down and make myself comfortable as I try to reach him, but he doesn't pick up. I do a swipe, making sure he isn't around then I send him a message. I order a whiskey cocktail as I wait for him to show up, meantime I tap away my phone while learning and side-tracking my environ. I watch people visiting the restroom while I sip on the drink, those rooms come in handy; when you want to get out of a conversation, a hide-out, or a way to leave. So better check it out before you start with the drinking too. Wondering where he is, he didn't have to bail at the last moment, he could be kind enough to pay some sort of curtsey homage and let me know but if he doesn't, it might be a perfect ticket for me to get out of these stupid invisible shackles he is trying to keep me in. A keeper of his word, but the way he's changed you can expect anything from him.

The hard liquor already gave me courage, where was he? Twenty minutes had elapsed, and no sign of him nor a response; my thoughts gave me jitters, maybe whatever he is tangled in is much crazier than I had imagined but I had to shake that off, it was Rahim. Despite our world being crazy and chaotic, one had to go to great lengths to fully terminate one, in any manner, so I decided to stay on longer, maybe even be in the moment. The other tables are giving me weird looks, making me wonder; can a girl not come out alone, have fun a little, and let loose? Not that I had a point to prove to them but I didn't want them to get to me, I got a lot at the moment to care for such a nuisance, although I promise myself to dance to any song I know or like; whatever the Dj plays next, just to piss them off more. 

Am growing impatient, my drink is almost gone and it looks like I have been stood up. I have gone through my phone to pass the time to prevent my mind from exploding; texts I haven't replied to, to calls that I may have ignored during the day, making a mental head count on who to call the next day. Went through WhatsApp status and had a peak at my small circle's lives; some crazy, funny, and trending memes, reading people's minds, and so forth. Found myself on Instagram, checking what people are up to, and then on Twitter; where all the heated conversations and things that matter are discussed. I wanted out of this club and go somewhere else to let the steam off, yet I couldn't leave.

As I sat there pondering on my thoughts, stewing in my feelings, a shadow creeps and lingers on the table, promoting me to look up. All the pent-up emotions washed away. He was looking glorious in that shade of light. I wasn't up for this as I had thought before. His presence was too much and I couldn't stand up to greet him instead my eyes feasted on him, taking him in. Did he come from the runway or was he working? He looked. He is tall and lean, with chiseled features and piercing eyes. His dark hair is styled in a perfectly tousled manner, giving him a rugged yet sophisticated look, commanding attention in designer clothing that accentuates his sculpted physique, he was a heartthrob. I take my time to study him and appreciate his physique but I couldn't agree that out aloud; his natural commanding aura all around him, he is a work of art. He is still handsome, more in a manly way not the rakish boyish manner; that I just want to stare at him, absorb all of him, etch him in my mind. He is too much to take; instead, I focused on the sleepless nights he has imposed on me and the threats.

 "You are here." He states plainly. Good; no apology, rude, or straight to the point. He pulls out a chair and makes himself comfortable.

"How nice of you to finally show up."