Chapter 33

Larry's POV

Larry: I do hope things will turn out for the better this Saturday Nana...

Nana: Florante's pretty bummed up right now but he'll be better...don't you worry Larry dear...Nana's quite an expert on the subject...I have wisdom stored beneath this gray head to handle Florante's mommy issues enough to give any distinguished shrink in the capital a run for their money...

Larry: Ha-ha! Thanks for answering my call Nana...it's always a fun time talking to you..hope I did not interfere with your affairs...

Nana: Larry dear if you're as old as dirt like me, a call from a handsome young man like you ignites my ancient bones and weary joints better than a hundred Glucosamine tablets could ever do...

Larry: Haha! Goodnight Nana!

Nana: Sleep tight sweetie pie...

I grabbed my wallet and took Florante's photo from one of its compartments. It's the one I took a shot while he was sleeping.

Maybe Florante is right, I am a liar. 

I am a liar because I am a coward. I hide the truth from him about us leaving soon afraid he would keep his distance. I hide the truth from mom and dad about my sexuality afraid I would let them down.

I have lied so many times to myself that I do not know who I am anymore.

I stood right up from the bed and looked at myself in the mirror. I slapped my cheeks a couple of times to bring myself to my senses.

"Common Larry, you can do this! You got this!" I repeatedly utter the words like a living mantra.

I took one huge breath and descended downstairs to the living room where my parents are.

Mom and dad are coiled up in the sofa munching on a bowl of salted pistachio nuts. Its earthly scent is strikingly similar to the smell of hay after the rain.

They both look so in love like they are still dating despite being married for quite some time already.

The sight reminded me of the night Florante read to me "The Great Gatsby". Maybe the narrator Nick was right about the 'boat against the current' passage in the book because we can never really escape from who we are no matter how we try.

I do not want to end up like Gatsby, imprisoned within the walls he created for himself. I want to break free from the shackles of my own doing.

I stood by the fireplace because I needed its warmth to calm my nerves. I look at the woods burning slowly scintillating in the darkness, casting shadows wherever its orange light reaches. Mr. William Shakespaw and little Edgar Allan paw shared the mattress at the corner. It seems like they have gotten along really well.

"Mom...dad...can I talk to you guys for a second?"

"Fire-way honey..." mom replied eyes still fixed on the TV.

"Dad?"

"Oh sorry...what is it, son?" He straightened up from slouching and turned off the TV. The room was dead silent. I can feel my lips tremble so I bit it.

"I have a confession to make..." A lump is forming in my throat and I struggled to say the next few words.

"I'm...I'm gay..."

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry I failed you guys...I'm so sorry...I really tried...I really did try..." hot tears are streaming down my face and I instinctively wipe them off with my sleeping robe.

"Please...say something..." I almost beg. The other hand inside my pocket grabbed the soft fabric of cloth underneath, trying to hold on to something I do not know what is.

"Come here, honey..." Mom signaled for me to sit beside her. I slowly walked towards the sofa rubbing my eyes with both of my hands.

They looked at each other and then shrugged.

"You owe me a dinner cupcake," said mom to dad and I don't understand what just happened.

Mom pulled me into her chest as soon as I settled in. She runs her fingers through my hair and I could have told her not to since that part of my head is reserve for Florante but I just let her because I needed it.

"Honey we know..." she looked down and smiled softly. The fire reflected on her face giving her eyes a warm glow. Dad peeked from the back of mom's head and covered us both with his embrace.

"Really? But why did you guys not confront me about it?"

"We thought it would be best if we will give you an ample time to discover who you really are as a person until you're ready...to come-out"

"You're brave son...I am very proud of you" dad curled his lips.

"Dad doubted at first so we had a little 'bet' to see whose parental instincts are sharper..."

"Wait, what? You're betting on me to come out?" I said smiling. "I can't believe you guys!"

"I doubted my judgment at first too.." said mom. "But then I saw the way you look at Florante and I know...I just know it because that's how I look at your dad the very first time that I saw him" she continued.

"Can't blame you...I was a sight to behold back in the days" dad nudges mom's cheeks with his in a loving manner.

Their eyes connected like two opposite poles pulling them towards each other's lips.

"Mom..."

"Yes, honey?"

"Love you..."

Dad reached out for my closest arm and rubbed it with his hand affectionately.

"No, I love you for dad?"

"No...cos you lose the bet!"

The sickening silence I felt earlier was shattered by our laughter along with the chains that bind me to myself for a long time.

Tonight I had been freed.