Chapter 244 - Final Arrangements part 1

There are very few mortals in this enlightened age who believe in vampires. To most of the modern world, we are just mythological creatures, no more real than unicorns or fairies or trolls. Or worse, pop culture heartthrobs. Pale and moody boyfriends created solely for the purpose of satisfying the omega male fantasies of lonely young women. Oh, how those Byronic pretty boys irritate me! Those works of fiction unerringly fail to portray just how truly deadly we are, the depravity of our desires, our terrifying inhumanness.

Of those of you who actually believe that we are real, very few have met a vampire, or have had any dealings with our kind. Our race was nearly annihilated during the Dark Ages, so we are exceedingly rare creatures. Most mortals who chance across a member of our race rarely live to tell the tale. They end up, like our dinner companions tonight, drained of their blood and buried in some remote wooded lot.

But there are a few mortals who live among us. A few lucky men and women (or unlucky, depending upon your point of view) admitted into our inner circle. Some have captivated an immortal, made one of us fall in love with them. They are fated, usually, to be inducted into our ranks-- whether they want to be or not. Some have sworn their allegiance to our kind and become our mortal agents. Others have survived a close encounter and dedicated their lives to destroying us— fearless vampire killers, ha!

The upper echelon of the Roman Catholic Church knows that we exist. An order of monks who called themselves the Venatori hunted us nearly to extinction in the 16th and 17th centuries. Pope Pius the Fifth harbored a particularly vehement loathing for our kind, and was largely responsible for the formation of the the Venatori. Fortunately, the Church no longer pursues us, though there are still some among us who fear a modern Internecion.

There are two ancient banks, the Monte dei Paschi di Siena, founded in 1492 in Italy, and the Berenberg Bank in Hamburg, who knowingly look after of our fortunes. I have accounts with both of them. The last time I checked, my net worth was somewhere in the vicinity of four billion euros, and I'm not a particularly materialistic immortal. When you are 30,000 years old, you tend to accumulate vast sums of money and property, whether it is your intention to or not.

And then there are the lawyers.

The oldest law firm in England, Thomas, Lampard and Sade, provides legal services to many European vampires. There is another in the United States, the Rosen Law Firm in Arkansas, and one in Russia, Vodoleyev & Partners, who are also aware we exist.

The day before we left for Germany, an attorney from Thomas, Lampard and Sade arrived in Liege to see me.

Cue the lawyer jokes.