Who Are You?

Sitting amidst the shelves of books, the weight of guilt and confusion bore down on me like a heavy burden. I couldn't shake the feeling of being a villain, of violating Ludwig's body and his privacy. When he had bought me at the auction, I had feared the worst—being devoured by monsters or subjected to their cruel whims. Yet, the reality had been something entirely different, and far more troubling. Why had it been me who seemed poised to assault Ludwig?

"What the hell..." The words escaped my lips before I could stop them.

Tears threatened to spill once more as I grappled with the overwhelming mix of sadness and shame engulfing my heart. It was difficult to reconcile the fact that my first kiss had unfolded in such a humiliating manner. While I had been powerless to control my own body at the time, did Ludwig truly understand that? It seemed unlikely. Perhaps my words had originated solely from my own mind, while my mouth had operated independently, driven by its own will. Regardless, I couldn't shake the nagging fear that Ludwig might harbor negative perceptions of me because of what had transpired.

Tears flowed freely as I grappled with my inner turmoil. Despite the circumstances that led to my actions, I couldn't help but feel a sense of shame and betrayal. Yes, I had resorted to stealing to cover Elizabeth's medical expenses, and I had deceived those I borrowed money from, but deep down, I knew I was not the person my actions portrayed me to be. This was my first encounter with such intimate behavior, and I couldn't shake the feeling of having compromised my purity. Yet, amidst the chaos of my emotions, a rational thought emerged – perhaps it was for the best if Ludwig distanced himself from me.

Determined to uncover the truth, I persisted in my late-night study session, delving deeper into the pages of the books before me. Even as the night deepened and Lily brought my food, I remained steadfast in my pursuit of answers. Despite her insistence that I retire to my room, I couldn't relent. I carried two books with me, unwilling to let the night end without gaining some insight into the mysteries that plagued my mind. With unwavering resolve, I vowed to continue until every question was answered, no matter how long it took.

As Lily hurried ahead, her footsteps fading into the distance as she embarked on her task of delivering plates in the bustling kitchen, I found myself alone in the tranquil ambiance of the library. With a deliberate motion, I closed the heavy wooden door behind me, the soft thud resonating in the quiet stillness of the room. 

As I began my solitary journey back to my quarters, a sudden movement caught my eye, halting me in my tracks. In the dimly lit hallway, I watched as Leaf emerged from a room that held a mysterious allure, a space known to be frequented exclusively by Ludwig. With a swift motion, Leaf closed the door behind her, disappearing from view before she could register my presence.

Initially intent on resuming my journey, I felt an inexplicable pull, a mysterious force beckoning me towards the enigmatic room. It was as if an invisible hand guided my steps, urging me to explore what lay beyond. Despite my reservations, I yielded to the tantalizing allure and approached the door with caution.

Ensuring the area was clear, I turned the handle with trepidation and pushed the door open, revealing a glimpse into the forbidden sanctum beyond.

As my eyes adjusted to the dim light, I surveyed the room, pondering the significance of its secrecy. Why was it that only Ludwig, Leaf, and a select few trusted individuals were granted entry? What mysteries lay concealed within its walls, shielded from prying eyes?

Though tempted to delve further, a voice of reason cautioned me against trespassing into realms beyond my purview. I reminded myself of my transient status within the castle, a mere guest whose presence should not disrupt the delicate balance of power and intrigue that governed its corridors.

The icy chill of the door handle sent shivers down my spine as I gripped it tightly, my heartbeat thundering in my ears. With trembling hands, I balanced a stack of books against my chest, the weight of them adding to the palpable tension in the air. Cold sweat dampened my palms, and a sense of dread crept over me, as if I were on the verge of being caught in a forbidden act. 

Despite my inner protests, an insistent curiosity drove me forward, compelling me to confront the mysteries that lay beyond the threshold. I steeled myself against the rising panic, determined to uncover the secrets that Ludwig guarded so closely, even from those within his inner circle.

As I cautiously stepped into the dimly lit room, my breath caught in my throat, every nerve on edge. The faint glow from a distant window offered scant illumination, casting eerie shadows across the space. Yet, as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, the room appeared deceptively ordinary, its furnishings bathed in a muted light that provided a semblance of reassurance.

"Who is it?"

A sudden voice shattered the silence, jolting me from my reverie. Startled, I lost my grip on the books, sending them tumbling to the floor in a cacophony of noise. My gaze darted towards the source of the sound, only to land upon the figure of a woman reclining on the bed—a vision of ethereal beauty that stole my breath away.

"Who are you?" I whispered, my voice barely audible above the pounding of my own heart, as I stood transfixed by her mesmerizing presence.