Choices of a Life 2

And two days before Joe's son underwent an important surgery, I exerted myself like never before in my entire life to move only my lips and draw Joe's attention.

I succeeded, and after much effort, Joe realized what I was saying, and according to that, his son could be saved. He asked me what I wanted in exchange for what I had done for him, and as long as it wasn't freedom, he would do anything within his power.

At the moment, I found his offer funny, but it was exactly what I needed: a small favor like a small button on the panel, turned the wrong way or switched off for a few moments. That was all I needed, just an opportunity.

With great effort, I gave him the idea of what I wanted with my lips, and with even sadder eyes, he nodded in agreement but said he wouldn't be the one to end my life. Sadly, he told me that decision was solely mine and no one else's.

He told me what he would do to create a flaw in the program that kept me alive and what I would have to do to die. With a half smile, I thanked him, and then he left there crying, and no one else suspected anything. After all, everyone knew the situation he was going through with his son in the hospital.

The chance had come, and all I needed to do was hold my breath for less than 5 seconds, and the way Joe had set up the machine's system, everything else would collapse silently, thus causing my eternal rest.

But then I discovered that I liked other people's lives more than my own. I was more than anxious, extremely curious to know if Joe's son would survive with the tips I had given him. And how could I know that if I were dead?

I spent hours in doubt and knew that soon the medical scientist shifts would change, and maybe I would never have the opportunity I had that day again. To tell the truth, several times I counted to three, but I needed to stay for ten seconds without breathing for the machine's system to collapse.

I had more than enough courage to do that, but my desire to know about Joe's son's health was greater. So in the morning when Joe arrived, I could hardly wait for the result he would tell me.

I know this is impossible because inside that bubble, I had no movement at all, and it wasn't because I didn't want to, but all that chemistry around me completely inhibited my actions and reactions.

But I can swear to you that I felt my legs tremble when I saw him coming close to me with his eyes full of tears. That's when I thought, "What good did it do not to sacrifice my life if I have to spend the rest of it in here? What's the point of having all this knowledge and not being able to apply it in a humanitarian way?"

Because I felt smart enough to believe that if I were conducting all the procedures I taught Joe, his son would still be alive.