The Snowflake That Never Melted

Ru was running along a street in flames. He was trying to reach the white car that suddenly stopped before the gargantuan demon. But as he ran, the road didn't get any shorter; on the contrary, it got longer and longer.

He wanted to scream, but his voice wouldn't come out. His legs appeared to solidify into stone—he couldn't move them. He saw his friends get out of the car and shoot at the demon with a rifle. Then the demon crushed the vehicle and hit Vaelan with its fiery tail. Vaelan went flying, his long dreadlocks and leather jacket on fire. Where he fell, his skull cracked and all his bones were broken. Yet he was alive—Ru could hear his groans. Vaelan's lips moved with Clockmaker's whispers—she was reversing time. But because they couldn't go back far enough in time, their bodies were burning again and again.

They weren't dead. They were alive but burning nonstop.

And then "Rui," they said, smiling. "Don't come!"

After they said, "Don't come," everything went black in the burned hollows of their eyes and started all over again.

Ru ran down a burning street to reach them. He was living the moment of their death, and it went on like that; no matter what he did, he could not break the cycle.

All Ru could do was give up and maybe accept death. When he tried to stop, the boundaries of the cycle thinned. Sudden gusts of wind were fanning small, partially independent fires. The fire was steadily approaching him, scorching houses, gardens, and cars in its path.

He compared the rising flames to lean, thin, tall, hunchbacked giants. Ru's red giants were cheerful despite their herniated discs. They clustered together, holding hands and weaving a circle. A circle of fire that centered on Ru and gradually narrowed.

Ru, experiencing the relief of being reborn together with the fear of dying, consumed the turmoil that dominated his feelings with great breaths.

Ru whispered, never stopping, "This time, I will not let you die."

"Not this time, my mates," he repeated, his eyes locked on the flames that consumed his friends.

"I will save you!" he shouted, his voice rising above the roar of the fire.

The crackling of the burning trees mixed with the raging flames. Ru did not stop, even when the mighty noise drowned out his voice: "My mates!"

Flaming branches fell one by one. The cries of animals could be heard. Ru covered his ears with his hands. He didn't want to hear or see anymore. He just wanted his twelfth death to happen even if it was by burning again.

"Like a phoenix?" asked a rather weak and unrecognizable voice.

"Yes, like a phoenix," Ru replied.

The voice asked him another question, "Do you remember his name?"

Ru answered with a question, "Whose?"

"The guardian of the Tree of Knowledge, the sage who hides the seeds of life," the voice said, sounding a bit raised but still unclear.

"Isn't its name Phoenix?" Ru asked softly.

"Even a human knows that name," the voice replied.

"I am a human," Ru tried to end the topic.

"You are so ignorant; I wish you were dead," the voice said. This time, it was filled with joy and childishness.

The voice was different from the shrill voices of Ru's little girls because of its beauty and innocence. This factor fascinated Ru.

Ru opened his eyes when he asked the question, "A child?

A moment later he found himself in the midst of a dead forest, surrounded only by shades of gray, and he was certain of his location. The only sounds were the pounding of his own heart and the wheezing of his breath. He licked his lips and tried to rid himself of the unpleasant feeling, cleared his throat, and finally tried speaking again.

"Where are you, child or sage?"

There was no answer.

Ru took his first steps as carefully as the toddler. Still, the ashes flew along with his steps. The cloud of dust that formed in front of him looked like a bird, but it disappeared as quickly as it had formed.

"It's clear you enjoy playing," Ru said with a smile. "So be it."

He kicked away the ashes that covered the ground.

He saw the face of a small child in the cloud that appeared.

"It's either me or you," Ru said. He didn't know what to do but knew what he wanted to do.

Ru, the tenth clone, discovered a dance school thanks to her stepmother, a cleaner. The dance type he watched most was ballet. Imitating the ballerinas, the little boy started dancing alone. One day, the dance instructor found his behind-the-glass antics charming and humorous and enrolled him in school. The tenth clone had the potential to become a famous ballet dancer. Unfortunately, he died tragically when he was nineteen years old.

And Ru, the twelfth clone, had already forgotten that he was a ballet dancer at one point in his life. But he knew how to dance better than before.

"Let's dance," he said, retrieving a long branch from the ground.

Ru's branch was a weapon, and every step was rhythmic. He started by slamming the stick on the ground, lifted one leg in a graceful arabesque movement, and then whirled around, kicking up ash mounds around him.

He was truly defying gravity in his dance. He leaped higher and higher, as though he were gliding through the air, treading on ascending wisps of smoke. He was continuously turning the branch. He ultimately conjured an ash storm surrounding him. Some images were flashing within the ash clouds.

Ru's eyes followed the rapidly changing clouds of dust. He interacted with the images as he continued to dance.

The first images coming through the dust clouds were of an ancient forest. This forest, full of lofty trees and majestic plants, was illuminated by light waves, sometimes breaking the grayness with the colors that emerged. There were star-like patterns on the trunks of the tall trees. Light flowers and butterflies flew around him.

A gigantic dragon with wings and red scales appeared in the sky. It breathed out flames and looked at the dancer with hostile eyes. Ru showed his fearlessness to the dragon through his wild maneuvers and powerful kicks.

Occasionally he saw giants moving around him. Some were friendly, some were hostile. Ru successfully repelled them with his dance and the ashes he scattered.

The most powerful image was when a gray shadow the size of a mountain appeared. Beneath this shadow was a man with a statuesque body. The man seemed to rise from the land he had destroyed, sword in hand.

"I found you, the Gray Shadow," he whispered. Ru felt like he knew the Gray Shadow better than anyone else—better than anything else in the world.

"You are Seneca."

Suddenly, the Gray Shadow moved and plunged the tip of his sword into the ground.

Ru jumped but hurt his foot. From where he fell, he watched in horror as the giant shadow sliced his world in two with its sword.

His soul was shouting "No," but his mind couldn't comprehend what was happening.

Ru stood up abruptly, his fear quickly turning to anger. In response to this move, the Gray Shadow reappeared and plunged his sword into the ground again.

Ru involuntarily looked at the Gray Shadow and continued to feed his image with the dust he had raised.

"I will destroy you completely, Seneca," he yelled.

The man in the gray shadow gave Ru a look with eyes that shone with silver light. Ru didn't want to get into the depths of those eyes, which seemed intense. Yet, he accomplished nothing by avoiding. His whole being quivered, and the quivering was eroding his very shadow.

The sensation coursing through his veins transcended the fear of death. He felt like he was about to vanish; he lost his balance. He fell to the ground once again and merged with the dust. It was as if a knife had been plunged into his heart. He could hardly breathe.

This time, Ru lacked the strength to rise up. He was struggling on the ground, where he had landed.

"You couldn't beat him," said the reappearing innocent voice of unknown origin.

"Stop," Ru raised a hand as he coughed to catch his breath.

"No, I won't stop this time," the voice said with resentment. "You were so caught up in your ambition to beat him, Ru. You didn't even hear us."

"Huh?" Ru said, wiping his mouth with his hand.

"You were just fighting. And you always, always, always enjoyed fighting," the voice said, this time from above. It was so powerful that it blew the ashes away and spun them around Ru. "For you, there are always and only enemies!"

Ru found himself amid a swirling cloud of ash all around him. He struggled not to get caught in it.

He was making an effort to hold on to the ground while he was screaming, "STOP IT!"

A moment later, Ru caught a glimpse of him. The boy's angry and tearful face was a pale blue in the whirlwind.

"You didn't fight for me like you did for your mates," the boy with snow-white hair and icy blue eyes stated firmly. His voice grew louder. "You did nothing, nothing, NOTHING to save me, brother!"

The boy's words were as sharp as ice and his expression as soft as snow. Ru's spiritual armor had been damaged in several places.

"But why?" Ru asked quietly. And despite the storm swirling around him, he rose from the ground. He managed to stand upright. He lifted his head and asked innocently, "Why should I be the one to save anyone?"

Then he clenched his fists and hissed through his teeth, "Why me? I can't even save myself! How can I save you?"

And he shouted, "I am not a hero! And I never will be!"

The hurricane subsided but was replaced by a snow-laden wind.

"I already figured you out," the boy said, hiding his presence behind the snowflakes, his voice a ringing melody of despair and frustration. "Your deaths and rebirths are to satisfy your ego," he continued. "But I'm still here. Don't worry, I'm the one paying for the pain you created, brother."

"Enough of this emotional abuse," Ru said, partially turning his head and trying to ignore his brother. "I want to wake up now! Wake me up now!"

As the storm swept away the ashes of the past, the boy's voice echoed from far away, but from somewhere within Ru: "Yes, King! Or should we say dead kings?"

"What do you mean?" Ru asked as the landscape around him darkened. The dust clouds disappeared, the Gray Shadow vanished, and Ru floated in the void of his consciousness.

With one last effort, he raised his eyes to meet his brother's. Ru fell hard as the image reflected in the icy blue eyes froze, and he felt a sudden pain in his body.

Then someone came. This person embraced him and took him on a dazzling journey full of sparkles.

"I hope you don't remember anything," someone whispered.

Ru could just make out the whisper, but the person's voice was an indescribable weight.

And that person kept talking.

"I've had enough trouble with your enemies and your lovers. There's no space for something else."

The cryptic words lingered in the air as Heise gently laid Ru down on a soft bed. The room was dim, the faint glow of moonlight filtering through the curtains, casting shadows that seemed to shift and breathe. Ru's mind raced, fragments of memories flickering like distant stars. Who was his rescuer? Who were these enemies? And these lovers?

In a haze of confusion, Ru fought against the weight of shadows, yearning to see, yet Heise's grip held him captive in darkness. He gently placed his hand over the boy's eyes, murmuring the enchanting lullaby softly into his ear.

"Sleep, sleep, in the starry sky,

Close your eyes, my child; don't cry.

Dreams come, gentle and kind,

Rest your head; you'll find peace."