CHAPTER 8

“WHY?do I deserve this pain coming from you Michelle?”he asked me and I could clearly see the redness in his eyes, as if he was about to cry so I looked away.

“Brian, don't ask me if you deserve the pain you feel because you know my answer. All those days, weeks and months that we have a relationship I don't do anything but to love you and trust you, but then when I told you that I'm pregnant I expect that you will be happy,that you will tell me that I'm great but then I'm wrong,you have nothing to do with my father that even though mom was just a friend, dad took care of me and loved me even though they were not married to my mother. You know, I don't want Lene to live without a father because I don't want her to experience the pain I suffered that no complete family but nothing. That was the destiny's choice. So I did,I break up with you from the sake of my daughter” I cried and said, now I have proven that I have not been totally healed of all the pain I suffered.”You know what's more sad is that when you just say to me to abort Lene and when you are ready we can make again, Brian doesn't use my son just to change him. He's from me so it hurts me. I said and I saw the shedding of tears in his eyes,it hurts me to see her cry but what she did hurt more.

“Is he?”it was like cold water was poured on my voice when I heard it at the top of the stairs, I slowly turned towards it and I was so shocked and depressed when I saw my daughter, Lene. She heard and saw Brian and saw us.

“Baby?”i called him weakly, I saw the redness in his eyes, he came down and went in front of me, I knelt next to him and touched his cheeks.

“i heald evelyhing mommy,is sher was my daddy?”he asked crying.

“Anak”

“Mommy pleash don't lie, you're the one who said that it's bad to lie”, she said, so I cried and hugged her. I'm not ready, I'm not ready to admit the truth to her yet. Not yet.

“Michelle?”

“Mommy?”

My father and son called me side by side, I let Lene out of the hug and I also looked into her eyes “you will not hate mommy, right Lene?”i asked nervously. Many questions come to my mind. So I couldn't help but be nervous.

“I'm not mommy, I still love you even though you lied, he comforted me so I cried softly.

“Yes baby, that guy who is standing on your side was your d-dad” I said and I don't know why I stammered when I told his father Brian.

I saw the joy in Lene's eyes that even though I was always with her and showed her love. I didn't see that glow in her eyes. She approached Brian and opened her small arm, Brian lifted her who was still red eyes because of crying, I stood up and looked at them.

“You look like me po” Lene smiled at Brian.

“Of course sweetheart, I’m your dad” Brian smiled.

And I was surprised when Lene suddenly burst into tears and hugged her father tightly, she pressed her head to his neck “d-don't leave ush again d-daddy” he cried and said to his father.

“I'm not baby, I will stay” Brian said and hugged his son, I looked away from the two because I can't see them like that. I'm hurt, not for myself but for my son because he just experienced seeing the father, and I'm afraid that the joy that Lene feels might be short-lived,’, it doesn't matter that I'm the one who gets hurt ‘, not just my son, just Lene.

“Mommy come here, letsh hug” Lene invited me, I was very tired before approaching my father and son.

I hugged the two but I didn't let Brian and I's hair touch each other. But that's how surprised I was when he suddenly grabbed my waist and hugged me tightly, I was struggling but he was stronger than me.

“Stay still baby,let me hug you like this” Brian whispers to me, talking. I will be ungrateful if I say I didn't miss him. So yeah, I miss him, I miss his hug and his touch, I miss how our body connects to each other when we are hugging.

I just hope that this night will never end, that this night will never end on how my daughter meets his j*rk father.

I'M COOKING our breakfast now, Brian slept here because Lene didn't want to let go and I couldn't do anything about it but agree. But he slept in another room with Lene, I gave in because they were together again for four years.

Oh shunga Michelle, it's natural that they are together now because the father doesn't want to.

I just shook my head at the thought and continued cooking and that's how surprised I was when suddenly someone hugged my waist, I would have looked back so that his face would immediately sink into my neck.

“Good morning” Brian greeted me hoarsely and without my own I bit my lip because of his seductive voice. He slowly made me face him and I saw his messy hair,but I could smell the mouthwash he used on his breath and his face was also clean. He slowly brought his face closer to mine and was about to kiss me suddenly…

“Mommy,daddy!”i immediately pushed him when I heard Lene's happy voice entering the kitchen, I looked at Brian before turning my back on him and continuing to cook. And I could still feel his warm gaze on me from behind.”Good morning daddy, I heard Lene greet her father. I heard Brian's footsteps walking away as if he had approached his son.

“Good morning too, baby” I heard him greet his son.

“Good morning mommy” Lene greeted me so I smiled and faced her after what I was cooking.

“Good morning too, baby” I smiled Kaye Lene and came to him to kiss him on the cheek.

“Mommy, you need to kish daddy too” Lene shaped me to make me look at him “Itsh good morning kish mommy” he added. I looked at Brian whose smile was wide on me, but the fool also seemed to be waiting. I also smiled at Brian and turned to Lene.

“Baby, I already gave daddy a morning kiss so you don't need to request I smiled at Lene and I saw Lene's wrinkled face.

You thought so!

AFTER we finished eating breakfast, I gave Lene a bath, she knows how to bathe herself again, while I was in the living room watching TV. I saw Brian entering the house because someone called her.

He sat next to me.

“I need to go home” his information.

“Then go” I didn't hesitate to speak to him.

“Won't you and Lene come?”he asked.

I sighed softly and glanced at her for a moment “Lene already enjoyed her life here, and besides, Cierra might scold me when we leave here, I answered.

“But Michelle I also need to see my son”frustration was visible on his voice.

I sighed again and looked at him after turning off the TV.

“Brian,my I remind you that from the beginning you don't want Lene anymore, remember the day you told me to abort my child?so don't act as if I'm bringing Lene somewhere because even though I really want to kill you now, I won't deny you my son that you want to kill. I said seriously and saw the pain in my eyes.

“I thought we were okay”

“Well Mr. Salvador, your thoughts were wrong. Because it doesn't mean that I let you sleep here is we are okay, I just put you to sleep here because that's what Lene” wants, I told him sarcastically.

“Michelle can't you really forgive me?”

“NO!because I will never forget the night you told me to abort my child and now you are here as if you didn't tell me that, I cried and said and stood up.”We don't need you, Lene needs a father but that doesn't mean we're going to go with you because it's a big stupid thing to do. Brian” I said angrily and I got even more angry when I remembered something.

“Do you know the pain of seeing my mother cry because I said I was pregnant?i told mom that I was pregnant at first she was happy but when I said that I was not responsible for the man who got me pregnant, she cried and it hurt because even though I was angry with her, she was still my mother. Do you know that I told myself that I will not get pregnant until I am married because I don't want my son to experience what I experienced, I did,the heartache is when you see a happy family, The pain in t'wing is asking me where my dad is because they always only see mom at school. And what hurts more is that dad has a different family and we're just hanging out with mama” I'm crying I said to him,i can't take the emotions I feel now facing him. I wiped my tears and looked at him “you can now leave,’don't worry, I won't take Lene away from you, she's still your daughter and you have a right to her even if you don't want to before. But don't ever expect that we will come to you”, I said seriously before leaving her there and going up to my room. When the door closed, that's when I started crying.

Brian Salvador POV

I can't blame Michelle if she is angry with me because of what she did and I told her before. I only now regret what I told her to abort our child, when she is no longer with me, when we are done, when she is free he is with me. And when he lost his love for me.

“Why why ale you clying po?”i looked up at the boy who spoke in front of me, now I'm sitting on the sofa after Michelle turned her back on me earlier. I wiped the tears that were running through my eyes and tried to smile at Lene,my daughter.

“Nothing baby, just slept so daddy” I answered before making him sit on my thigh.

“You’le lying daddy” he said it made me look stupid. Michelle was brilliant, she knew if someone was saying truth to her and I'm so proud that Michelle raised Lene well.“You didn't get dirty, because I shaw you po that you ale clying” he added.

I sighed softly and looked at Lene “baby, will you be angry with daddy if I hurt mommy?”

“It dependsh on how you hult mommy,daddy” he answered so I smiled before hugging him.

I'm sorry baby if I want to abort you, daddy was so selfish at that time.

I hugged him tightly when suddenly my cell phone rang so I made him sit on the sofa and walked away from him to answer the call.

Andriana calling…

“Baby?!”he was happy when I answered his call. Andriana was one of my flings that I ended a long time ago because I feel like I'm betraying Michelle even though we're gone. But I still have a lot of flings, but I don't do relationships after Michelle because she is the only girl I love.

“What do you want?”i have no lifelong questions .

“Where are you?”he asked happily.

“It’s now of your business to know,Drianna.I hang up this call I have something else to do”

“But baby—”

“And please Drianna don't you ever use to call me baby and stop pestering me, we are already done”

“Since when Brian?the day you know where’s your slut?”he asked angrily and I was like a volcano that exploded when he called Michelle. He knew Michelle because before I could make her a fling, she was already my friend and I knew Michelle was the only one he was in charge of, how dare she called my love,slut!

“Don’t you never ever dare called her like that,Drianna. You know what capable of I am” I threaten her.

“Where are you?”he asked again as if he didn't say anything earlier.

“It’s none of your business, Drianna” I said annoyed and hung up.

But then, I hadn't even returned to the living room when suddenly my cell phone rang and I immediately answered it.

Sheila calling…

“Babe?”I heard she giggled after I answered her called.

“Why?”i asked annoyed.

“Hmm, nothing I'm just checking up my boyfriend” I can still hear his soft laugh. Yeah,Sheila is my girlfriend, know by his family. If we are arranged couple, no strings attached. They don't want mommy and daddy but because they are friends with Sheila's family they didn't do anything there,because of the past year, Michelle is still what my parents want for me, which I enjoy.

“We are acting couple in front of your family Sheila so don't acting now that you are indeed my girlfriend”inis I said to her.

“Oh babe, you are angry again, what's wrong?”and he even intended to make his voice so attractive that even a feather in my body wouldn't stand up, maybe if Michelle did that, not only my hair would stand up, maybe even my pet would come along.

Okay Brian, stop thinking wild against your love.

“It's not your problem anymore Sheila, I'll do something important so if you don't have anything good to say better hang-up the call”

“Hey wait, your so impatient. I just want to say that you need to go home tonight—”

“Yeah I know that already” when I cut off whatever he had to say and without hesitation the call was turned off.

I went back to Sala and saw Lene watching TV. And that view made me smile, just now I was so happy when I saw my son, well aside from Michelle, Lene was also my happy pill.

“Baby?”i called Lene who immediately hugged me so I smiled, she continued watching TV while I caressed her long hair “what's your full name?”i asked, because apart from the nickname Lene and it came from Michellene, I don't know anything else about her name.

“Blielle Michellene Sandavol po” Lene answered and I don't know why I felt a pain in my chest when she mentioned her last name.

I will not deny the name attached to my son, but when your last name is attached, that is a different matter.

And now, I understand why Lene is using Sandoval instead of Salvador because her mom was angry at me and I can't blame Michelle for that. But I'm also thankful that she raised our child well in her own.

I'll make it up to you baby, if I have to kneel in front of you and kiss your feet just forgive me I'm going to do that in a heartbeat. Just don't leave me again.