029 How I Look

"Let's start from the beginning," Rose said gently, she gave a pause for Eden to narrate how she came to the conclusion that she dressed cheaply and more importantly, what Eden would like to change about the way she dressed.

"I was on my way back to my apartment when one of the staff mistook me for a cleaner," Eden said sniffling. "When I asked her why she explained to me that my attire was less than, that I didn't look like someone who could afford to live here?"

"And she didn't tell you what someone who lives here should look like?" Rose asked, Eden could hear the irritation in her voice.

Rose was very protective of her Goddaughter after all.

"No she didn't," Eden said. "She just implied that I needed to dress better,"

"Well Eden it all starts with you, do you want to change the way you dress?" Rose asked. "Do you want to change up your style?"

"What if I do?"

"Well, then you must ask yourself why. Is it because you want other people to perceive you better? Do you want to express yourself through your clothes? Or are you just tired of wearing the same old thing?"

"Well I don't know Rose, I just want things like this to stop happening," Eden cried.

The blonde heard her godmother sigh long and tired over the phone before she spoke again.

"Eden people are always going to have something to say, that's why I want to know why you want to change your style, you told me you've never felt beautiful and I know a lot of that has to do with your family," Rose said softly.

Eden nodded as if Rose could see her over the phone but Rose felt it anyway.

"I can't say I understand how you feel, my parents were poor but they always made me feel like I was their little princess, and now you have me to help you do the same," Rose said tenderly.

"Thanks, Rose, I just want to feel good about myself,"

"You don't need the opinions of others to do that, my dear. You're always a different season in someone's mind. But if you simply want to look good, I suggest buying a few fashion magazines and looking through the different styles,"

Eden smiled a bit at the actionable advice. Rose continued.

"I'm not giving you this advice so you can look good to impress others, I want you to look good and feel good, when I visit we'll talk hair too,"

"Thank you, Rose, for the advice. I'll try to get the magazines," Eden said twirling her hair around her fingers, the stress was starting to get to her again. She had done so much today, it was all so exhausting.

"I also heard about the end of your engagement, I'm so sorry Eden!" Rose said sympathetically.

"No, Rose, somehow I was expecting it. Daniel could be such a mother's boy and his mom didn't like me at all!" Eden said, letting her frustration show a bit. She got up from her bed to pace the room while she talked.

"Never date a mother's boy and if he comes back to you crying don't give him another chance,"

"I won't! He broke up with me over text, he didn't even return my calls," Eden said, fresh tears sprang from her eyes. She held a hand to her face and wept softly.

It seemed her new beginning came with so much heartbreak she almost regretted it. Things were changing faster than she could keep up. A baby bird pushed out of the nest is either forced to fly or heading for a crash.

Her fiancee had left on the whim of his mother.

And Eden never had much of a family to begin with.

"Eden, are you there? You went silent all of a sudden," Rose said in worry.

"Yeah, I am, just a lot of thoughts going through my head at once. I don't think I've even had time to process the breakup, we were together a long time you know,"

"I know, but it was better he announced his intentions now than at the altar," Rose said. "You'll find someone else,"

"How can I? There are so many beautiful girls out there. Girls who look like models just in the street and I look like…"

"Don't you dare call yourself the same words your father and sister used to call you," Rose said sternly.

"How do you want to grow more confident when you're beating yourself down with the same words that took your confidence?"

Eden said nothing, only frowning.

"You are beautiful in your own way Eden. The sunset and the sea are both beautiful but would you say they look anything like each other?"

"Of course not,"

"So why should the existence of another pretty girl mean that you're ugly?" Rose asked with a laugh. Eden laughed too.

"You're right, I'll try to stop saying those words to myself. It's a bad habit,"

"It's putting yourself down and you'll stop it right away," Rose said. "When I come by we'll have a longer discussion about you and your blossoming business. I'm so proud of you for moving out,"

"Thank you Rose, I'm proud of myself too for coming to this decision, even though it looks like everything is going wrong now," Eden said.

"Your new life will cost you your old one," Rose said.

They talked a bit more before Rose had to hang up to attend to some personal matters, leaving Eden alone with her thoughts.

The blonde walked up to the mirror she had taken with her from the Marshall Estate and looked at her reflection.

In the mirror she saw an unsophisticated girl with teary, puffy eyes. Eden looked at her overalls and the faded white T-shirt she wore underneath the straps of her overalls. Her blond hair was chopped in a messy, uneven bob.

Fredrick never bothered to take her to hairdresser for any kind of proper hair cut. Eden or the staff had always done it themselves.

"I like how short it is, but maybe I ought to go for something more elegant," Eden said, she gave herself a weak smile in the mirror but she was deeply uncomfortable with her own reflection, she turned away and headed back to her bed to lay down.