Prologue

I knew my life would turn out differently than I previously imagined when, at the age of fourteen, my secondary gender was confirmed to be omega. However, the drastic change it took was far from what was expected. With my mom having passed when I was ten years old, it was just me, my father, and two older brothers. I like to think that we took care of each other the best we could. My dad always seemed supportive of my crazy aspirations. 

Running through the house jumping and doing flips he would clap proudly as I proclaimed that I would be a gymnast, and he would snap his fingers once I finished reciting a poem as if I was actually giving a public performance. One time my dad, who knows nothing about art, tried his best to sound like a professional critic when I was pretending to showcase my art at an exhibition. Jayce and Cal, my two older brothers, underwent so much grunt work to try to appease my exuberant whims, and all three of them doted on me like the baby of the family that I was. 

All of that changed in the blink of an eye. When it was time to undergo testing for my secondary gender there didn't seem to be a doubt in anyone's mind that I would turn out to be an alpha like them. So, when the words on the paper clearly displayed that my secondary gender was confirmed to be omega, we were all taken aback. The first few days after we received the results there was a subtle shift in the atmosphere at home. 

Instead of being supported in my dreams and aspirations I was quickly dismissed with "find something to do that will keep you out of the spotlight" and began getting reprimanded for my now "outlandish" desires. I assumed this was normal, and just went along with it. After all, being an omega would prove to have its' own challenges eventually. I assumed that this was the best way they knew to keep me safe. 

Not wanting to cause any strife at home, I changed myself to fit the new image they had for me. I stopped asking to try new things, I stopped voicing my opinions on matters that would affect me directly, and I stopped wanting for more than I already had. My dad placed me in an omega only high school the following year, saying that it was unseemly to casually be around alphas. Any friends that had presented as alphas were forcibly removed from my life. When I turned sixteen, I wasn't even allowed to get a summer job because they would not be able to keep me safe. 

Days passed, then weeks and months. Eventually I didn't even know who I was, having spent so much time stifling myself. Then one day I graduated high school, and I naively thought that I would be able to find myself again. That maybe, just maybe, I would be able to regain some of the independence and freedom that I had lost. However, that too turned out to be a pipe dream. Having developed a bit of a rebellious streak, be it an ember of who I was in the past reigniting, or a newfound trait born from my circumstances, I decided to go out with some friends as soon as we finished walking the stage. 

It's unclear if what happened after I got home that night was a direct result of my actions or if it was a long time coming, but either way – a lot of things changed after that night. Being at home already felt suffocating as it was, but the changes my dad had made practically turned me into a prisoner. He started holding on to my inhibitors, and he would only give me doses as I needed them. If he was going to be out for a while he would leave maybe two or three pills on the counter for me just in case, but he would not allow me to hold on to the bottle. If I wanted to go somewhere it first had to be considered an "acceptable" place to go, and even after I would not be allowed to leave unless my dad, Jayce, or Cal were with me. 

My freedoms were being stripped away one by one, my grip on the outside world was slipping away, and my knowledge of myself was slowly fading. Eventually Jayce and Cal, who were twenty and twenty-one years old respectively, moved out to finish their college studies out of the city. Once I was left alone with my dad, I learned what my future would look like. 

"M-m-marriage? You have to be kidding me! I'm only nineteen years old, why the hell would you arrange a marriage for your youngest son?!" 

"Rowan, I know that this may come as a shock to you, but it is already hard enough for a normal omega to have a worry free life, much less a male omega. You won't make it on your own, and even if you were to try you would just end up being taken advantage of." 

"Dad, stop trying to control my life, it isn't yours to do with as you please! I want to live for myself, not for someone else. I don't want to be used as some sort of prize given to the highest bidder. You used to support what I wanted before I presented as an omega!" 

"THAT WAS WHEN I THOUGHT YOU WERE LIKE ME, SON!" 

It wasn't until that moment that I learned the deafening sound of silence. 

"What do you mean 'like you'?" 

"I thought you would grow up to be an alpha, strong and respected, able to achieve whatever it was you wanted. But you're not. You're an omega, and omegas need to be protected. The best way to do that is find someone respectable for you to marry and support you." 

"No. I won't do it. I won't marry someone I don't love, being forced to live for them and their happiness rather than for myself and my own." 

The look that crossed my father's face was contorted with a rage I never knew he had. 

"Your options are simple," he started, "agree to the arranged marriage or try to make it on your own. I promise you though, son, that you won't amount to anything more than a common whore on your own, spreading your legs for the smallest amount of cash just to be able to eat something. I'm doing this for your own good. You will meet him tomorrow, and you will sit there and look pretty so he doesn't lose interest." 

With that, my dad walked off to his bedroom. 

That was the last conversation I ever had with my dad before deciding to take control of my life. At 11:30pm, on December 31st, 2022, I ran away and didn't look back.