(Petyr POV)
"Why am I here exactly?" I ask Jon Arryn as he sits at his desk in King's Landing.
Enough time has passed and the King's Hand seems to be at his wits end right now. Nothing is working out for him. And while some might think that he is simply doing too much all at once, I know better. As much as I hate to say this, Jon Arryn is skilled at what he does. Be it playing the game, political aspects, and the matter of money, he is quite adept at it all. There was a reason why he managed to hold the 7 Kingdoms together as long as he did in canon. Everything was going somewhat until he died and then shit hit the fan.
"You are here to tell me about the development of Gulltown, which you have been tasked with," he says and then looks at me.
I can tell he is waiting for me to speak and uses the very basic concept of not speaking to have the 'tension' build-up. But that does not affect me. On the contrary, as the smartest and most knowledgeable man in every room, all the time, I enjoy building tensions and 'awkward' silences. I find it hard to not outright laugh in his face when he uses the 'technique' on me. I smile gently and wait for him to speak. I look him in the eyes and see his judgemental gaze on me. He is wary of me and my ... shall we say talents.
And that's good. It would not be very interesting he we weren't. Why would you play a game without anyone sitting on the opposite side of the board? That would be far too boring. And yet, despite all of this, it is still boring. Which is why I am going to travel very soon again.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"So?" Jon finally breaks the silence as he sees me lose focus and start to daydream.
"So what?"
"What have you got to say for yourself?"
"Why would I have to say something?" I ask.
"Don't play games with me Petyr. You are decades too green to be doing that."
"I have no idea what you are talking about, Lord Hand."
"..."
He taps his fingers on the desk, seemingly holding in his anger. How cute.
Once again he stops talking and I don't say anything to break the silence. The same thing as before, only this time I can tell he is getting increasingly angry. The look in his eyes speaks of a wish for violence. How sad of him to feel this way towards me.
"Well?"
"Well, what?"
"I am losing my patience with you Petyr."
"And why is that, Lord Hand? Are you feeling unwell?"
"SILENCE!! You will stop your nonesense and tell me what I want to know, or I will have you flogged!"
"How uncivilized. And yet, I still don't know what you wish to know. If you want to ask me something you have to use your mouth, I can't read minds, Lord Hand."
Jon Arryn clenches his jaw together. His blood pressure is rising, judging from the color of his skin and the pulsing jugular vein.
"What happened to the men who were sent to Baelish Keep?"
"Huh?"
I am genuinely confused right now. What was he talking about?
"Well?"
"Men? I don't know what you- ... Ooooohh, haha. I apologize, Lord Hand. I completely forgot about the delegation you sent to Baelish Keep. As far as I'm aware, they should still be there. Either that, or they drank themselves to death in an inn or something. But I'm unsure."
"Is that so? Then why haven't they ever sent a raven to King's Landing, explaining how their investigation was going?" he asks me.
"Investigation? I thought it was about taxes and the like. Are you implying those men were investigating something in Baelish Keep? What could that be?"
"Naturally, they were only looking if everything was going as it should and that no law was being broken. With the new King who does not belong to House Targaryen, things were bound to change and your quick rise to power was suspicious. We had to make sure."
I hear his voice tremble ever so slightly. Embarrassment, but it is hidden well with arrogance on his part. Those idiots think that I would just let them discover my 'illegal' trade. Even if I had some ... which I absolutely do not, I would never leave it for them to find.
"I understand, Lord Hand. Well if that was everything-"
"It was not. There is more we have to discuss."
"Yes?"
"This time regarding Gulltown."
"What about Gulltown? Did you get a disturbing message or something?"
"On the contrary. I am getting only good news. As far as I can tell, the ports are cleaner than ever, the taxes are being paid and the criminal aspect of the city has plummeted to almost nil."
"Truly? That's impressive. Even I didn't know that. Your men must be doing remarkable jobs. The taxes are my doing though. So well done, to me, I suppose."
"Yes, well done to you. There is just one question I have for you."
"Ask away."
"If everything is going so well and I am only getting positive feedback from Gulltown ... how come the coffers are not getting filled at all?"
"What?"
"Yes, it is strange to me. Normally, a city is either well off financially, or not. And that can be checked very quickly if you have a look at the coffers of the city. Now, imagine my confusion, when I hear everything is going well, the taxes are being paid and the harbor is doing remarkably well, but the coffers aren't being filled?!? Naturally, I ask myself where the problem lies. So, 'Lord Baelish' ... do you have an explanation?"
"Well ..."
"Yes?"
"Things are indeed going well and the port is also doing better than years ago, when I started but ahh ..."
"What?!"
"The trade is not doing as well as the reports might have stated."
"..."
"..."
"...What was that?"
"The trade ... it is not doing as well as it was one year ago. I mean it was abysmal when I started. Then it got much better in the following years and then finally, they reached a peak. And then ... well, then it got worse. The traders didn't come as much anymore and some no longer arrived at all. Less traders means less taxes and less taxes means less money. You understand."
"..."
Jon Arryn looks at me without saying anything. I can tell he is thinking about a lot of things right now. He might explode any moment now ... only a matter of time.
"Even if that were the case and even if we ignore the reason for this, there should be more than enough coin in the coffers from the years prior then. What happened to those?"
"Ah well ... you see ... things were a bit complicated and I ahh ... I gave it away."
"..."
"..."
"Repeat that?"
"I gave the coin away."
"You gave it away?"
"To the poor, yes."
"To the poor."
"Indeed. They were hungry and needed food in order to eat, so ... I gave all those who were hungry and in need of homes and places to sleep and work, some coin."
"Aha. And that is all?"
"I mean it is a bit more complicated than that, but in general that is all, yes."
...
*BAM*
Jon Arryn suddenly stands up and smashes his fist on the desk. The chair falls back and the papers fly away, spilling the ink.
"DO YOU TAKE ME FOR A FOOL?! WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DO THAT?! WHY WOULD YOU GIVE AWAY COIN TO THE POOR WITHOUT CONSULTING ME IN THE MATTER?!! DO YOU REALISE HOW YOU HAVE JUST MESSED UP? I WILL HAVE YOU THROWN INTO THE BLACK CELLS FOR THAT!"
"Oi, relax. You were the one to give me the position. And as such, I hold the highest authority over all matters concerning money. I had to make sure the people were well fed and their needs met. If not, getting the normal amounts of taxes, let alone any coin would have been impossible. The poor give very little taxes because they have very little. The rich give very little taxes as well because that's how they got rich in the first place. To balance this out, I had to show myself as a good and friendly people person. I gave a lot in order to gain a lot back. You are not seeing anything, because ... well it hasn't worked yet. This stuff needs time after all."
...
For a moment he is silent. He seems to be thinking about my words. And while I surprisingly didn't lie, the reason for doing it was different. I didn't want to appear as the good and honorable man, who cares about the weak and innocent. I simply wanted to punch Jon Arryn in the face, financially I mean. I don't care what he does or how well off he is, I just wanted to give him headaches and sleepless nights where he asked himself, whether or not he was being cheated by me and if he could be stabbed in the back. The fun part is that, even if he believes my words now, he will still ask himself whether or not he just imagined all of that or if he really is cursed with bad luck.
I left him some problems back in Gulltown after all. You don't gift money away like I did to the poor and then expect everything to go smoothly. On the contrary. Now that they have tasted the 'forbidden fruit' so to speak, they will want more and expect more. When I am taken from my position in Gulltown and placed here in King's Landing, the one who will take over my position in Gulltown will face the expectations of thousands of poor and commoners who demand the same treatment I gave them and the only thing they will receive is the opposite. This will lead to problems and maybe even civil unrest, resulting in riots or higher criminal rates.
"Very well. I understand your reasoning and will make sure to tell your successor about it."
"My successor?" I feign ignorance, "Will I be going somewhere?"
"Aye. You will come here to King's Landing."
"Oh? And why is that?"
"Ever since Robert was crowned King and married Cersei Baratheon née Lannister, things have been going very slowly. I feel like my feet are stuck in muddy waters and every step I take uses enormous effort. I am surrounded by selfish liars who are only looking out for their own gains. The Spider has all the 'little birds' as he calls them and is the only way for me to get as much detailed information as possible. At the same time, I question his loyalty to Robert and the Crown. His words might sound friendly, but they make my hair stand up."
"Sounds terrible."
"Indeed it is. For that reason, I have been doing everything myself until now. While I was here at court, Lord Nestor Royce ruled as High Steward of the Vale. I appointed Janos Slynt as Commander of the City Watch after the death of Manly Stokeworth, but the positions of the Small Council are still open and it has become far too much for me to handle on my own. Lysa has had a miscarriage and I wasn't there to console her. I also have no time to ... you know."
"Work on another one."
"Mind your manners, Petyr! But you're right, that's what I mean."
"Am I understanding you correctly?"
"Aye. It has gotten too much for me to bear on my own and therefore you are asked to take the position of Master of Coin."
I don't say anything and look thoughtful. Then I stand up and nod my head.
"My Lord Hand ... it would be my pleasure to accept this prestigious position and lend you a helping hand," I say and smile 'politely'.
"Very well, that does put my mind at ease ... somewhat."
...
All according to plan.