Dead-Ucation

"Morning Zoltan" exclaimed Vlad. He had woken with a new enthusiasm, not for the TV in front of his bed but for a new opportunity.

"Indeed it is Master Vlad, and in case you had forgotten you don't do mornings. You are a vampire," said Zoltan. Vlad looked at Zoltan with a smouldering look.

"Not until I'm 16, I'm not. Until then I'm going to do what normal kids do." reprimanded Vlad. He shook his head and began preparing for his first school day ever.

"Turn me upside down and look for batteries," joked Zoltan. Vlad turned to Zoltan and told him to look at his clothes and take a guess. "Are you sure this is wise Master Vlad? You could be named and shamed as the spawn of Dracula." reminded Zoltan

"Relax Zoltan, it's going to be cool. That's what kids say around here, right?" asked Vlad. He wanted to make a good impression today especially due to his unusual family.

"Yes as in 'isn't it cool we killed the vampire'," jeered Zoltan. Vlad rolled his eyes and began to go downstairs without making a sound. He skipped breakfast and made his way to the door without alerting anyone before the bell rang. Vlad winced and heard Renfield rush toward the door and decided to get there before him.

"Hello Vlad, I'm Robin's mum, Elisabeth. Ah nice," said the blonde lady dressed in a green cardigan and a floral dress. Vlad glared at Robin while Robin looked sheepishly at Vlad.

"That's mum's way of saying it needs a clean," said the young girl who looked slightly too young to be going to the same school as them.

"Vlad my man, is Ingrid around? asked one of the twins. Vlad looked at Robin one more time.

"So expecting anyone else, Robin" mocked Vlad. Robin shrugged and said that they had all followed him here. " Well let's get going before my dad hears them," warned Vlad. They started to move before being stopped by Ingrid.

"Yo Ingrid," said one of the twins. Vlad groaned at the twins' incapability to even act normal in front of his sister.

"Ah, so you must be the famous Ingrid. You've certainly made some fans in our house," said Mrs Branagh in a coquettish tone. The twins immediately started shouting at their mum to be quiet. Mrs Branagh smiled and advised, "Well, you'd better get ready for school."

"You can't possibly think I'm going to school," said an exasperated Ingrid. Vlad stood in front of Ingrid and began to stare her down.

"You don't have to but I want to. Just don't tell Dad," asked Vlad. Ingrid looked at him and shrugged. Vlad sighed in relief, he was almost certain she would've told Dad. As they began to leave the castle, a sudden gust of chilly air blew past them.

"What peasant dare knock at my palace of doom," boomed the Count. Vlad banged his head on the wall closest to him. He knew that even though his father had been very lenient on him recently, he definitely would not let him leave the castle in the day.

"Hello, you must be Mr...?"

"Count" corrected his father.

"Mr Count, I'm Elisabeth Branagh, your new neighbour. Welcome to our country. It's wonderful to meet you," she ranted onwards before pausing to take a sniff. Renfield had entered the room and with him came the smell that always lingered no matter how many baths he took. "What is that smell, I think it coming from there," she told the Count as she pointed near Renfield who immediately blamed the slime pit. "Ooh, I think there is a problem with your drains. My Graham's a plumber, I'll send him over after taking Vlad and Ingrid to school," said Mrs Branagh. Vlad winced and looked at his dad's furious expression.

"School, what school? In fact, don't answer that. My children need no education from inferior sources. I'll teach them myself," boomed the Count.

"Please Dad, how else am I going to make friends," begged Vlad. He hoped that his Dad would allow him to go but he knew it was a futile effort.

"Our kind do not need friends," warned the Count. Vlad went quiet trudging up to his room watching his only friend and his family leaving his castle while Ingrid gave him an apologetic look but he turned around so that no one would see his eyes begin to tear up as he turned where he knew no one would be able to see him he ran to his room and jumped on his bed. Vlad began to cry, wondering why his father had to ruin his one chance to finally be normal. If he was a normal child, he could threaten to take his dad to court but nothing scared his father other than slayers and an angry peasant mob. It's not like his dad knew what a court was anyway. Vlad once again realised that his dad knew nothing about human society and began to plot a way for him to finally get his first day in school.

"Here we are son, Stokely Grammar. A fresh start for both of us," said Eric Van Helsing. But Jonathan Van Helsing doubted that. He knew of his father's eccentricities and expected him to somehow ruin his reputation before he even had a week at his new school.

"You will behave yourself at this school, Dad," demanded Jonathan. Jonathan had been bounced around school throughout primary school and wanted to live a stable life. "It'd be nice to stay in one place for more than a few months," said Jonathan.

"Jonno, I promised didn't I, and a Van Helsing never breaks his promise," assured Mr Van Helsing. Jonathan rolled his eyes as he saw his father move his gaze toward a pale child wearing a cloak. "Blood and garlic! It's a vampire," whispered Jonathan's dad. Jonno sighed and told his dad, the more likely event, that it was probably just a boy in a cape as the Headmistress came and decided to greet them. "Hello, Headmistress. Just getting my morning squats in," lied Mr Van Helsing.

"15 seconds into our new school and you've already spotted the vampire," jeered Jonathan. It was just like his dad to somehow find a way to ruin his life at every school he went and this must be a new personal best for his dad.

"It's instinct son, I'm a vampire slayer," he told the air as if it was a revelation to the world. Jonathan looked at his dad in disbelief. How could someone this age still believe in the monsters that lie in the dark?

"No Dad. You're a woodwork teacher,"

Vlad had been waiting for the morning for quite a while. His plan had finally come to fruition with Robin helping out. He had got the Count dead to rights. All he had to was wait for the bell to ring and for his dad to wake up. He finally got up from bed and looked outside at the sun. It was the last few sunny days of September and his dad was insane if he thought Vlad would be staying inside. He gleefully hopped downstairs, poured himself a bowl of Frosties with milk and began to eat it. For some reason, food was one of the few breather things that he allowed in the castle other than Robin. He finally heard the bell and following that a yell from his father about a Branagh woman. Vlad watched Renfield run towards his dad in fear.

"Master, it's a breather, with a metal horse," warned Renfield. Vlad almost chuckled at Renfield's fear. Even his old-fashioned grandparents probably knew what a bike was.

"Ah yes, you must be Vlad and Ingrid," said the woman that was on the 'metal horse'. Vlad turned around and saw his sister behind him and was about to ask how long she had been there before she opened her mouth first.

"And you must be wearing that for charity," quipped Ingrid. Vlad smirked at his sister's wit. Ingrid had never failed to entertain him with her insults and pranks.

"Oh, a free thinker. That's splendid," replied the woman. As she praised Ingrid for insulting her clothing choice, the Count had picked that moment to glide into the room with Renfield at his feet. " You must be Mr...,"

"Count," corrected the Count. Vlad grinned at his dad's annoyance.

"Mr Count then. I am Headmistress Harker. I have heard that your children are not placed in a school. I would advise you to put them in Stokely Grammar before you get taken to court," advised the Headmistress. The Count almost laughed at her proposal.

"Taken to court, ha. I'm aquiver with fear. What, pray tell, is this so-called court?"

"Oh only the locals' equivalent of an angry peasant mob," snarked Vlad. Vlad smirked deviously. If his dad didn't question anything, he would be on a first-class ticket to a normal, everyday life.

"What," yelled the Count as he looked to the horizon seemingly remembering something. "Right Vlad, Ingrid get ready for school," he stammered out as he was brought back to reality. Vlad smirked as he locked eyes with his sister who gave him a knowing look. As cunning and sly as he may be, his sister could see through everything he did.

Count Dracula hated that Branagh woman. After handing his children two, one-of-a-kind brooches, she had decided to wave at him and gloat at her victory. How could a mere breather woman force him to give up quality time with his spawn which could be used tutoring them on how to be top quality vampires. Her smiles and her good attitude and her waves and her happy family were clearly all a sham. The Branagh's were a formidable opponent and the Draculas 'deal' with their formidable opponents. The Count knew what this was. This was no mere battle. This was war.

Vlad hated Mr Van Helsing. Not only did he try to confiscate his 'one-of-a-kind' brooch for the entire day, but he's also a slayer. If his dad knew, they'd be on the next flight to Transylvania or more likely the next road trip. As much as he enjoyed safety, Vlad needed Stokely to feel normal. Sure slayers were bad but dealing with his grandparents and vampire society was even worse. He'd have to give up his friends and his father's new attitude to breather items and breathers themselves. Vlad didn't know what he was going to do but waiting for the end of the day seemed like torture. He thought he would love school but with a slayer here at all times, Vlad felt as if the glamour was gone. If Vlad didn't sort out this slayer business soon, there wouldn't just be a battle. There would be war.

Eric Van Helsing hated vampires. All of them were parasites and mosquitoes, even the children. He was a slayer through and through, so what if he hadn't actually killed a vampire yet? It was a work in progress. Especially since he had caught one of the big fish, the Draculas. Why the Draculas were in a town in Wales was a mystery but Eric wasn't a slayer to solve mysteries. He had waited for an opportunity like this to finally prove to the HQ that he was no longer Van Helstink but a full-fledged slayer just like his predecessors before him. He may not have the crest on him but he knew what he saw and he was ready to act. Eric knew if he didn't act soon this wouldn't merely be a routine slaying for his reputation. This would become war.

Jonathan hated vampires. Anything to do with them really. He wasn't scared or even believed in them. He just hated how even the mention of blood would make his dad go into slayer mode and instantly anyone with dark hair and paler skin was a creature of the night. Not even Jonathan's mum leaving could make his dad see through his delusions. His dad was a lunatic but he loved him. So Jonno hated vampires and wished the idea of them had never existed. Even a couple of days would be great. So that for once his dad could be a regular dad who finally took him on that fishing trip he'd never gone to. Getting his dad away from all this vampire stuff with a whole castle and a foreign family wouldn't just be a struggle. It would be a war.

"Ingrid, start getting packed, we're going home," said the Count as he quickly threw his clothes in the bags with Renfield.

"What do you mean we're going home," barked Ingrid.

"It's the neighbours, Ingrid. They're driving us out with their good turns and nauseating favours," he complained as he shuddered remembering Mr and Mrs Branagh coming into his castle.

"Is this because Vlad told his little friends about us? They're not going to tell anyone, you know," Ingrid grunted before turning to Zoltan and gulping comically. The Count stopped and began to look furious. He seemed about to say something to Ingrid before he sped away and came back immediately with Robin and Chloe in his hands with Vlad right behind him.

"Let them go, Dad!" Vlad demanded with a tone of finality. He glowered at his father for even thinking of ruining his life here. Vlad was so focused on helping his friends that he didn't even notice the half-full bags.

"They know we're vampires, they must be destroyed. In fact, it was probably them who denounced me to the school," berated the Count with his fangs lowered and his eyes glowing red. Vlad shrank and told his dad that it wasn't them who did it. "Well then who could have done it,"

"I did," confessed Vlad stepping forward and taking the blame for his 'foolproof plan'. He waited for his dad to scream, shout or punish him.

"You... you double-crossed your own father, you clever little fox," praised his dad. Vlad looked up confused at the congratulating tone sharing a similar look with his friends and Ingrid. "Mmm, admirable cunning. You know, this town really brings out the best in you son. In fact, I think we may stay after all. While the locals may be sickeningly sweet, at least they're not... I don't know, vampire slayers," professed the Count. Vlad had beamed at the beginning of his dad's reassurance but as he finished, Vlad looked at Robin and Chloe with a plea for help. Vlad hated conflict but sometimes it was unavoidable. In going to school, he started a war...