Shadows of my mind.

I had never been one for nightmares, but that night, my slumber took a turn down a dark, foreboding path. As I drifted off, the familiar comfort of my bed seemed to melt away, giving way to a dreamscape that mirrored reality, but with a chilling twist.

In this hazy, twilight world, I found myself standing in the dimly lit hallway of our home, a cold sense of dread washing over me. Compelled by an unseen force, I pushed open the door to my mother's bedroom, my heart pounding like a drum in my chest.

My mother sat on the edge of her bed, her form bathed in the soft glow of the moonlight streaming in through the window. Her eyes were downcast, and she seemed lost in thought. I approached her cautiously, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Mom," I called out, "I need to talk to you."

Slowly, she lifted her head, her once-vibrant eyes now dull and lifeless. I hesitated, feeling as though I were treading on fragile ice. As I opened my mouth to speak again, my mother let out a guttural groan, her hands flying to her stomach as if to contain some unseen force tearing through her.

I felt my world shattering around me as I rushed to her side, my eyes wide with terror. "Mom, what's happening?!" I cried, my voice trembling with fear. But my words fell on deaf ears as she writhed in agony, her cries mingling with my own in a cacophony of despair.

My hands shook as I held her, my small fingers pressing into her skin as if I could somehow anchor her to this world. But her blood seeped through, staining my clothes and filling my nostrils with its metallic scent. I felt hot tears streaming down my cheeks as I begged her to stay awake, to fight against the darkness that threatened to consume her.

With a final, shuddering breath, my mother's eyes locked onto mine, her once-warm gaze now cold and accusing. "You caused this," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "It's your fault."

Her words pierced my heart like shards of ice, leaving me frozen in shock and disbelief. I felt my chest heaving with sobs as her lifeless body grew cold in my arms, her accusations ringing in my ears like a death knell.

Suddenly, the room began to spin around me, the edges of my vision blurring into a swirling vortex of darkness. I cried out as I felt myself being pulled away from my mother, her words still echoing in my head, melding with my own screams until they became a single, guttural cry of despair.

Then, as abruptly as it had begun, the nightmare released its grip on me, and I found myself awake in my bed, my body drenched in sweat and my heart racing wildly. The silence of my room felt deafening, a stark contrast to the chaos that had engulfed me moments before. Yet, even as I tried to steady my ragged breathing, I could still feel the echoes of my mother's words reverberating in my chest, an invisible burden weighing me down and reminding me of the unshakable terror that awaited me in the realm of dreams.

——⁠☆

The silence of my bedroom was a suffocating embrace, an oppressive shroud that wrapped itself around me, squeezing the life from my chest. I sat huddled in the corner, my arms wrapped tightly around my knees as if they could shield me from the darkness that threatened to consume me. It had been weeks since my mother's death, but her absence had become a tangible force, a heavy cloak that settled over our home, seeping into the very air we breathed.

The world had shifted beneath my feet, leaving me in despair. I was just eleven years old, but my mother's death has left me feeling various strong emotions. Guilt, pain.. emptiness. I had become a stranger in my own skin, a ghost haunting the halls of our once-happy home.

As the minutes ticked by, the voice in my head grew louder, its words a relentless onslaught that chipped away at my fragile self. "You should have seen the signs," it hissed, its tone dripping with disdain. "You were a terrible daughter. It's your fault she's gone."

Repeated to me like a broken record, each time, hurting more than it the last.

I pressed my hands against my ears, trying to block out the words that echoed through my mind, but they were like venom, seeping into my thoughts and poisoning my soul. I could feel my sanity slipping away, eroded by the guilt and pain that ravaged my heart.

The walls of my room seemed to close in around me, the shadows reaching out with spectral fingers to drag me into the darkness. My breath came in ragged gasps as I struggled to cling to the fraying threads of my sanity, my body trembling with the effort.

Just as I felt myself teetering on the brink of madness, a knock on my door broke through the suffocating silence. I froze, my heart pounding like a caged animal in my chest. The door swung open, and my brother, Zion's concerned face appeared in the doorway.

"Ese," he said softly, his eyes searching mine. "Dinner's ready."

I drew in a shuddering breath, forcing myself to meet his gaze. "I'm coming," I replied, my voice barely a whisper.

As Zion left, I pulled myself to my feet, my legs trembling beneath me. I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror above my dresser, my eyes haunted and sunken, my face pale and drawn. With shaking hands, I wiped away the tears that stained my cheeks and took a deep breath.

Stepping out of my room, I felt as though I were donning a mask, hiding the broken, tortured girl beneath a facade of normality. I walked down the hallway, the shadows of my mind trailing behind me like ghosts, their whispers a haunting reminder of the darkness that awaited me just beyond the light.