Chapter One

Ricardo

I wake up with the alarm clock screaming in my ears. I had chosen a song that I love as a ringtone, but nowadays I see that it was a mistake. I hated her with all my might.

I get up and drag my half—dead body to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready.

I comb my hair and choose something to wear. Not that I care much about it, but I needed at least a clean shirt. Then I turned the huge avalanche of clothes on the floor. Luckily I found a gray shirt that was wearable.

Living alone can seem like a wonderful thing. Not having parental supervision, no time to get home and total freedom to do whatever you want. But what no one tells you is that you have to do everything yourself. Absolutely everything. And that includes doing the laundry.

I had been curling up for almost two weeks and I had no idea I could accumulate so much dirty stuff. Not to mention the huge pile of dishes in the kitchen.

If my mother came home, she would rip my ear off the instant she walked through the door. Especially since every time we talk on the phone she reminds me to keep everything organized. I, of course, say it's all about control.

Chaos control.

Thanks to her I am studying in one of the best business schools in the country with everything paid. She financed my course, my apartment and all my expenses. The pension that my father gave me also helped, but it did not come close to the monthly expense that she had with me. I even liked to piss her off by calling her sucking mommy, but I had no words to thank her.

Unfortunately, choosing to come here was not just an academic decision. Of course that was the biggest reason, but I also wanted a little Freedom. Even though my parents knew I was gay, I didn't feel comfortable taking guys home or hanging out with them around the house.

She always told me not to be ashamed of who I was, in I did not feel the desire to act as I wanted near them.

To be honest, even if I liked girls I would feel comfortable.I always had a deep respect for my mother, so rubbing Valentines or girlfriends in her face was not something I would like to do.

I only want to take it home when someone really special shows up.

And I already had a strong candidate.

I finally managed to finish dressing and promised myself that I would clean the house when I returned.

I arrived at college on time and ran into the room. Luckily my friends had saved a place for me.

Classes dragged on. During the break I went to the cafeteria with my friend Robson to get a coffee. I needed a generous dose to get on with my day.

He was the only gay man who had a friendship in college. Of course there were others, but I never approached them.

We met at a student meeting at the bar near the college. Right away he realized I liked boys. Contrary to what you might think, I didn't bother with it. I was not ashamed of my sexual orientation, but few people knew about it there. I saw no need to tell everyone. But if someone asked me I would not deny it.

I ended up getting very close to him, especially because we were in the same class. He was intelligent and studious so he was a great ally for papers and study groups.

As I followed the room I passed Michel. I gave him a shy smile and received a nod.

Mic and I had a secret relationship for almost six months and the only one who knew about us was Robson.

Unlike me, Mic hadn't come out yet, so he respected his decision not to expose our dating. I won't deny that it bothered me sometimes. Especially because we had to pretend we barely knew each other in college.

I wouldn't talk to him there. At most we exchanged glances and discreet nods. I could not complain because, after all, I agreed with this condition.

— He won't even tell you a hi? — complained Robson— I think this is absurd!

— I understand him Rob. Not everyone is ready to come out of the closet.

— But I'm not telling you to kiss or hold your hands in public. Just an exchange of words. That wouldn't change a thing. No one would think badly of him for talking to an acquaintance.

— He is afraid. You know what his family is like.

— Let it be! But does he always have to stick to those girls? Are you gonna tell me you're not jealous?

It's logical that I felt.

Michel was a beautiful male specimen. He had an excellent body, extremely friendly and with a smile that ripped off panties, as Robson said. And precisely because of this several girls did everything to get his attention. That included hanging from him all the time.

I always tirelessly repeated that he was just mine. That it was in my bed that he slept. But it was getting harder every day.

— I'm used to.— lied — He doesn't call girls.

— Even so. I wouldn't have that cold blood. I would have pushed a couple of them up the stairs by now.

It bothered me to see Robson talking about it. I know he did it for my own good, but I didn't want to be bothered anymore. It was not the ideal situation, but at least I had it for myself. Even if no one but us knew.

During the last class, my phone vibrated on the table.

Let's see each other today baby?

Of course!

I'll arrive at seven :)

I'll order pizza

But I still prefer to eat you

Now I was anxious

We always saw each other in my apartment. He still lived with his parents so it was the only place we were free to be together.

Robson saw the messages and rolled his eyes but said nothing. He knew he wasn't going to change my mind.

—I was going to ask you out today but I see you have an appointment,— he said as we left the room. —If you change your mind, call me.—

—Why don't you go with someone else?—

—I like going with you because guys always come to us.

—So you just call me to use me?—

—Sure! I always know cat guys with you by my side!—

—Then you'd better put on your unicorn pajamas because I'm not getting out of bed until tomorrow!—

—Stop throwing your night of hot sex in my face!—

I shrugged laughing. It wasn't a lie, with Mic it was always very hot.

I ran home after school. I needed to fix that zone as soon as possible.

I picked up all the dirty laundry and stuffed it into the washing machine along with the bedding. Since I started hanging out with Michel I've bought two more sets of sheets for these occasions.

I spent all afternoon cleaning up. I felt a huge shame about myself. How could I alone have accumulated so much garbage?

Luckily at six—thirty I finished everything and ran to the shower.

He was always anxious and excited about Michel's visits. I always felt like the first time he came here.

I had never had a serious relationship. My first love was the classic straight best friend cliche. But unlike the stories, it never came true. The most I could do was hang out with his gay younger brother.

Unfortunately, this whole situation became untenable and I chose to stay away from both of them. She missed the friendship she shared with the two of them, but she couldn't bear this emotional confusion.

Nowadays I realize that it was the best decision I made. I managed to overcome this one—sided love and move on.

Just before seven the intercom rang and I rushed to answer.

I cleared Michel's entrance and went to wait for him at the door.

When I saw him get off the elevator, I wanted to jump on him. Michel was wearing a white T—shirt and jeans. Her blonde hair was modeled with gel and her brown eyes sparkled like her smile.

It was a huge exercise in patience waiting for him to enter the door to hug and kiss him.

But every second of waiting was worth it.

As soon as I glued my mouth to his and felt his tongue on mine and my body melted into his.

—I missed you too, baby,— he said in my mouth. —Do you smell that good to me?—

—Always for you.—

Although he was always insecure when I saw him in college, when we were together alone he was always very affectionate with me. And that tore away all the uncertainties I felt.

We continued kissing until we fell into bed. I tore off his clothes greedily as I ran a hand down his body. He still had some bruising from the boxing lessons he took, but it didn't seem to hurt anymore.

He looked as hungry as I did, and we devoured each other with all the accumulated horniness we were feeling.