Weight of Responsibilities

Kael stepped into his room for the first time since Lilien had gone missing. The familiar surroundings that had once been his refuge now felt alien, as though the walls themselves bore witness to his unraveling. The warm light filtering through the tall windows did nothing to pierce the cold, suffocating emptiness that had settled in his chest. His eyes fell on the bed, neatly made, its smooth, undisturbed surface mocking him. It looked so pristine, as if waiting for her to return, waiting for the person who should be lying there, wrapped in the safety of the sheets. But Lilien wasn't there, and the aching hollowness gnawed at his insides. He wondered if she'd ever be there again.

His gaze moved to the desk near the window. Stacks of unfinished papers cluttered its surface, a stark reminder of the life he had once known—before everything had fallen apart. Reports, letters, decrees, all waiting for his attention, as though the world still expected him to care about its bureaucratic demands. But nothing mattered now. Not the kingdom, not his duties as king. Lilien was all that mattered, and she was gone.

He had scoured every corner of the kingdom, explored every possible lead, followed rumors that led to dead ends. He'd searched the dense forests, questioned the townspeople, but Lilien had vanished like a shadow in the night. The gnawing emptiness in his chest was unbearable, a pit that grew deeper with each passing day. He had thought that perhaps by now, the relentless search would have dulled the pain, but the ache only grew more pronounced.

What tormented him most wasn't the loss itself—it was the hope that refused to die. That tiny, insistent voice in the back of his mind that whispered she's still out there. It whispered that she was waiting for him, calling out in the dark for him to find her. This hope, irrational as it was, kept him from collapsing under the weight of despair. But it also tore him apart, each moment that she remained missing another stab of pain. His mind gnawed at the edges of reality, a cruel reminder of what might be true—that she was gone forever. But he couldn't accept that. He wouldn't.

Despite the exhaustion that weighed heavily on him, rest was a distant, foreign concept. His body was crying out for it, the weariness dragging at his limbs like chains, but his mind refused to yield. How could he possibly rest when the woman he loved was somewhere out there, possibly suffering, waiting for him to save her? The very thought of lying down, of closing his eyes while Lilien was still missing, made him sick to his core.

A few restless moments passed, though they felt like an eternity. The room felt smaller, the walls creeping closer, tightening around him. His breaths came shallow, and his muscles tensed as if they, too, refused to be still. The air in the room was too thick, too heavy to breathe. It pressed down on him like the weight of the crown he bore. His heart hammered in his chest, urging him to move. He needed to move. Staying here, locked in this empty room, would drive him mad.

With a sharp, determined breath, Kael stood abruptly, his chair scraping against the floor as it toppled over. He had no plan, no destination in mind, only the overwhelming need to do something. Anything. Standing still, letting the world move on without him, was unbearable. He had to push forward, had to keep searching, even if every step felt like walking through a fog of hopelessness.

Without a second thought, Kael stormed out of the room, his long strides taking him through the dim corridors of the palace. His body moved with a purpose, though his mind was too clouded to know where he was going. He could feel the cold of the stone floor beneath his boots, hear the echo of his footsteps in the silence, but it was all distant, unimportant. The only thing that mattered was finding her.

His assistant, Orton, noticed the king's hasty departure and hurried to catch up, his soft footsteps quickening behind Kael. Orton, ever loyal and dutiful, had witnessed the toll the search had taken on his king. Though he said little, the concern on his face was evident, his eyes following Kael's every move with worry. He knew Kael was wearing himself thin, but he also knew better than to confront him too openly. Kael was a storm right now—fierce, relentless, and unpredictable.

Orton's breath quickened as he finally caught up, his footsteps almost inaudible against Kael's thunderous stride. His voice, soft yet firm, broke through the tense silence, though he knew it would fall on deaf ears.

"Your Majesty, I think you should rest," Orton suggested, his voice gentle but firm. He had seen the toll this search was taking on his king, and though his duty was to serve, he could not stand by and watch as Kael deteriorated.

Kael didn't slow down, his mind racing with a thousand thoughts. The streets, the woods, the caves…there were still places he hadn't looked. Still people he hadn't questioned. He didn't have time for rest. Not while Lilien was out there somewhere, possibly in danger. "Don't annoy me right now, Orton," Kael snapped, his voice sharp with frustration.

"Your Majesty, please," Orton persisted, fear creeping into his voice. He knew the risk of pushing Kael too far in his current state, but he couldn't stay silent. "I understand how you feel—the urgency of finding Her Majesty. We all do. But you can't keep this up forever. You need to be at a hundred percent to be efficient. Without rest, you'll burn out, and then what will happen to the search?"

Kael barely heard him, his thoughts too clouded with desperation to process logic. His steps quickened as he headed for the stables, ready to continue his relentless pursuit.

"Your Majesty," Orton called again, this time stepping directly into Kael's path. His heart hammered in his chest as he stood there, blocking the way of the king he both served and feared. His courage faltered, but his concern for Kael was stronger. He had to stop him before he destroyed himself completely.

"Move," Kael ordered, his tone icy and commanding. He stared at Orton, his eyes dark with a mix of anger and exhaustion.

For a moment, Orton hesitated. Then, reluctantly, he stepped aside, allowing Kael to pass. But the worry on his face remained.

"Your Majesty…" Orton began again, his voice quieter now, laced with guilt. Kael stopped in his tracks, his back still turned, but something in Orton's tone made him pause. The silence between them stretched on, heavy with unspoken fears.

"Lady Keara…" Orton hesitated, knowing this next piece of information would only add to Kael's burden. But he had no choice. "She's gone too. We still haven't found her."

Kael felt the ground shift beneath him. The weight of Orton's words was like a crushing blow to his already fragile resolve. Lilien had been his priority for so long that he hadn't even considered the possibility of losing someone else. But now, Keara was gone too, vanished just like Lilien. The responsibilities that had already felt insurmountable now doubled, pressing down on him with unbearable force.

His vision swam, dizziness overtaking him as he struggled to process this new reality. He couldn't do this. He couldn't keep losing people. But how could he choose between them? Lilien, the woman he loved, and Keara, who was like a sister to him?

His fists clenched at his sides as frustration and helplessness threatened to overwhelm him. The weight of the crown felt heavier than ever, pressing down on him with each passing second. He had sworn to protect them both, and yet here he was, failing at every turn.

For the first time in days, Kael's resolve faltered. He closed his eyes, breathing deeply to steady himself. But even as he stood there, his body tense with exhaustion and frustration, his mind refused to rest.

"Find her," he finally whispered, his voice hollow. "Find them both."

Without another word, he continued toward the stables, determined to press on—no matter the cost.