Chapter 83: Hidden Struggles

Chapter 83: Hidden Struggles

Ethan was momentarily stunned but quickly realized what Emily meant.

Emily sniffled incoherently, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"You asked me about it that day, and I told you it was just a stomach issue and advised against eating hotpot and ice cream…" Her lips quivered as she opened her mouth to cry, "What's the point of not eating ice cream and hotpot!"

Her crying made Ethan panic a bit. He grabbed two tissues from the table and fumbled to press them against her face.

"Emily, don't cry. Let me explain, it's not that serious—"

Before he could finish, Emily cried even harder, "You're lying! It's very serious!"

Her expression was one of utter despair, with tears streaming down her face.

"I read online that I can't have babies. The doctor said I can't get pregnant, wuwu!" Emily's distress grew with every word.

She knew she shouldn't be speaking to Ethan like this, and she understood he was just as upset. Yet she couldn't stop herself. When she leaned into his embrace earlier, it felt like all her emotions had found an outlet, pouring out uncontrollably.

She hadn't realized how complex her feelings were: sadness, fear, confusion, and even indignation—why her?

Others could have children; why couldn't she?

They could have a beautiful, intelligent baby, and they weren't even greedy, only wanting one. Why was it so impossible?

Emily's heartache intensified, and she clung to Ethan's shoulder, sobbing like a wounded animal. His dark gray suit was soaked with her tears.

Ethan gently patted her back, trying to soothe her. "Emily."

He softly called her name several times, hoping she would calm down and listen.

But Emily seemed entirely absorbed in her own emotions, unable to settle.

Ethan sighed quietly and then placed his hand on the back of her head, gently forcing her to look up at him.

Emily looked up with tear-streaked eyes, not yet realizing what was happening before Ethan pressed his lips to hers.

He kissed her with intensity, pulling her fully into his embrace, his strong arms wrapped around her, one hand aggressively gripping her slim waist.

The kiss was fervent, not giving her a chance to breathe. Her sobs and whimpers were swallowed up by the kiss, leaving her unable to cry any longer.

Once he stopped, Ethan's demeanor softened significantly. He kissed her tenderly for a while, his lips tracing her damp eyelashes and face until all her tears were wiped away.

"Stop crying," he said hoarsely, soothing her. "Listen to me, okay?"

Emily's lips were still slightly parted from the kisses, and she looked at him blankly.

Ethan rested his forehead against hers and sighed softly.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before," he said gently.

"Why?" Emily sniffled. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Ethan's eyes closed slightly. "I didn't want to make you cry."

"Emily," he said, pulling her close again, "I've told you before, I didn't marry you just to have children."

"But…" Emily murmured, leaning against him. "Even if we're married, we can't be childless."

Ethan shook his head. "To me, you are the most important."

"If you're going to be sad about this, I'd rather you never have to bear such a burden."

Ethan's gaze was resolute. He looked down at her with unwavering certainty.

"Emily, let's not have children."

Ethan's approach to the issue was blunt and decisive—going to the opposite extreme.

He didn't want to pressure Emily, but she still couldn't let go of her feelings.

Wanting a child was one thing, but being able to was another.

During their attempts to conceive, Emily had been motivated by a sense of sacrifice for the Harrison Family. But only now did she realize she genuinely wanted a baby with Ethan—a child that would bind them closer together.

Once she had calmed down and learned more, Emily tentatively suggested seeing a specialist. Technically, it wasn't infertility but difficulty conceiving. Treatment might help.

Upon hearing terms like "surgery and IVF," Ethan frowned but didn't respond.

He only wanted her to relax and not worry about these matters yet.

"When you're more relaxed, we'll think about it," he said, touching her cheek. "Emily, I still stand by what I said—I don't need children; I only need you."

His tone was firm and light, as if he had moved past the child issue entirely.

But Emily noticed Ethan's troubled stance during the night. She often saw him standing on the balcony, staring into the distance, with a small, flickering red light burning down to nothing without him raising his hand.

Emily watched him silently, sometimes feeling her nose tingle.

When he came back inside, she pretended not to know anything and lay down, feigning sleep.

She heard him lie down beside her, his solid arm wrapping around her from behind, with a soft, almost imperceptible sigh above her head…

Ethan was unwilling to show his stress to her, and Emily tacitly cooperated. They both set aside the issue but didn't seem to forget it.

Although they couldn't conceive a child at the moment, Emily remained at home, unsure of what to do next.

This idle time made her anxious.

Ethan seemed to be mindful of Emily's state of mind. He had noticeably reduced his business trips and came home earlier in the evenings. He even brought work home when needed.

Although sometimes he spent hours in the study on video calls, leaving them little chance to talk, she felt more at ease as long as he was around.

These nights, Ethan was often in the study for meetings, so Emily sat by the fireplace, reading and flipping through photo albums.

After her phone ran out of battery, she got up and searched around, not finding a charger.

Emily waved her blackened screen at Ethan, who was momentarily distracted from his computer, then handed her phone to her.

Emily took it, glanced at him, and tried unlocking it with her thumbprint, which worked instantly.

She didn't even know when he had added her fingerprint.

Ethan's phone was starkly business-like. The most used apps were email and internal company tools, WeChat mainly for contacting his wife, and almost no other apps were downloaded—not even a custom wallpaper.

Emily looked at the plain business phone with some dissatisfaction. She took a selfie and set it as the wallpaper, finally satisfied with a smile.

She didn't have a Weibo app, so she accessed the website directly.

As she hovered over the search box, a series of search history items naturally appeared.

Emily's fingers paused abruptly.

[Are IVF treatments harmful to women?]

[How painful is a fallopian tube clearance surgery?]

[Post-surgery symptoms for fallopian tube surgery]

[Side effects of IVF]

[What to eat for stomach issues]

Emily held her breath, blinking slowly and then turning to look at Ethan.

She swallowed hard, glancing back at the screen, her eyes starting to sting.

Emily put down the phone and walked slowly to Ethan.

Seeing her, Ethan glanced briefly before quickly returning to his computer, not speaking but discreetly extending a hand under the table.

Emily grabbed his hand and suddenly sat on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and placing her bare feet on his legs, curling up like a little cat in his embrace.

Ethan looked surprised for a moment, his long eyes moving slightly.

"What's wrong?" he asked softly in her ear, his voice warm and affectionate, "Are you being clingy again?"

Emily was indeed being clingy. She pouted, pressing her rosy lips to his chin.

"Darling, kiss me."

Ethan's lips curled up slightly, hesitated for a moment while looking at the computer screen, but eventually pressed his lips down.

Emily succeeded in her kiss, hugging him tighter. Just as she was about to reciprocate, she suddenly noticed Ethan giving her a signal, pointing at the screen.

Emily turned to look at the computer, blinking in confusion—the screen was filled with complex charts and documents in English.

"Emily," Ethan whispered, his lips pressed together in a half-smile.

"Our meeting camera is on!"