Mei—This Paramecium Is a Lost Cause

Inside the Valkyrie dormitory—

"Weren't you just going out for food?"

Mei, Bronya, Himeko, and Theresa all stared speechlessly at the pair before them.

Words couldn't describe how they felt. This paramecium... really went and snuck off!!

Just look at Elias' new headphones and cross necklace.

Look at Kiana's flowing hair and fresh outfit.

And that clingy, birdlike posture!

They were totally a couple who had just come back from a date! Even the air around them seemed to sparkle with pink glitter.

Mei: "I can't accept this!"

Himeko: "Damn it, I got careless!"

Bronya: "This is the greatest misstep in Bronya's life... to let someone like Kiana exploit a gap in security."

Though the three were furious, none could compare to one particular deep-sea maiden—or rather, her alternate personality.

(This can't be happening! Not her! Anyone else would be fine, but even Kiana is gaining affection points?! Hey Seele! If you don't step up now, you won't even get the leftovers! Get it together already!)

Dark Seele went into a frenzy within the mental space, biting her nails in jealousy, her leg bouncing as if powering a sewing machine.

To be outdone by a paramecium—it was a critical hit to her pride.

Meanwhile, White Seele was just as envious.

She also wanted to go on a date with her beloved Papa Elias. She wanted to leave her mark on him too.

"Hm? Just in time, everyone's eating dinner, right? If there's enough, give me a bowl too. Eh~ I think hanging around Kiana is making my appetite grow."

Elias rubbed his belly. The cake on the girl's lips was sweet, but it didn't fill the stomach.

Mei took a deep breath, her gaze zeroing in on the two new accessories Elias now wore.

"Elias, those headphones and the cross necklace—?"

"Oh, Kiana gave them to me today. How are they? They suit me, right?"

"They... really do."

(Damn it! I should've thought of that!) xN

All the girls mentally punched themselves.

They had completely overlooked such a simple way to boost affection: gift-giving! And the paramecium had seized the opportunity first!

Seeing Elias' delighted expression, as if eager to flaunt his gifts to everyone, they couldn't help but feel annoyed. Had none of them ever given him a gift?

What were they thinking?! Were their brains eaten by zombies?! Clearly, it was time to plant more sunflowers in the garden!

"By the way, Kiana, your hairstyle..."

Himeko stared in surprise at Kiana's loose hair.

Kiana proudly placed one hand on her hip and flicked her snow-white locks with the other.

"Hehe, Elias said he liked me this way. Besides, I was tired of that annoying braid anyway."

"Uh, alright."

As they looked at the newly transformed Kiana, the girls gulped hard.

They all realized—they had underestimated this girl!

With that old-fashioned braid gone, her true beauty had finally emerged. And now that the seal was lifted, she might actually be the most stunning one in the entire dorm!

Just letting her hair down—

She had gone from a clumsy, cute little duck to an elegant, pure white swan!

The moment she stepped through the door, they hadn't even recognized her. For a second, they thought she was a goddess fallen straight from the moon!

IQ and EQ? Who needs those anymore. Just with her current look, Kiana was now an extremely threatening opponent! And don't forget—Elias was a total white-hair fan!

Though Kiana had returned with a steady step, suggesting nothing happened, no one could let their guard down. At this point, it wouldn't be surprising if she crossed the finish line at any moment!

Yet the paramecium seemed unaware that the way the girls looked at her had completely changed.

No longer as a harmless pet girl.

But as a serious rival.

"Big~ Aunt~ Teri~!"

"Wah! Kiana, what are you doing?!"

"Nothing, just wanted to hug you. Wuwuwu~ Thank you, Aunt Teri."

Kiana was still moved by Elias' story about the wall.

So when she saw Theresa, she immediately pounced and hugged the petite, adorable principal, pulling her into a round of cuddling, kissing, and lifting.

"L-Let go! My dignity is slipping away!"

"Principal Theresa is so cute."

"Wuwu, Wendy, don't look!"

Theresa was on the verge of tears. Being treated like a child by her own niece in front of her former students—her already shaky dignity was in full freefall.

"Hmm? Speaking of which, where's Rita?"

Elias looked around.

He didn't see his personal maid anywhere.

Strange. Based on her usual style, no matter what she was doing, she would have dropped everything to welcome him back.

"Rita? Oh, she's dead."

"Pft—! What?!"

Elias nearly spat out his soup.

"Just kidding. She sparred with Mei today and got too tired. She's lying down in her room now."

Himeko pointed toward the upstairs bedroom.

The redhead had a complex look on her face. Thinking of the training room now reduced to ruins, she sighed. The love wars among jealous young girls were on another level.

Thankfully, she was a mature woman who didn't fight or compete... well, not that she'd win anyway.

Couldn't be helped. Her strength wasn't quite enough.

But she had reached the finish line, and her weekly life was quite satisfying. With Elias being strong enough, even if the number of girls doubled, he could still handle it all with ease.

(Still, I have to keep improving. Now that Honkai is no longer a threat, I can aim higher... At the very least, I need to reach S-rank!)

Himeko encouraged herself.

Just because she reached the end didn't mean she could stop progressing.

She had pride too! Just look at these young girls—they were all monsters! The entire dorm was filled with current or future Herrschers or S-rank Valkyries.

If she, the oldest (in appearance), stayed at A-rank, it would be too embarrassing!

"Rita sparred with Mei? You two didn't go all out, right?"

Elias asked with some concern.

Battlefield love triangles were like bombs. Even the best bomb disposal experts wouldn't dare be careless.

"Of course not. It was just a friendly spar. We really did hold back."

Mei replied with a gentle smile, brushing aside her now-shortened purple-black hair and flicking off a bit of lingering frost on her hand. As expected of the fridge owner.

There are always maids on earth brave enough to face the power of thunder. As a queen, she acknowledged the maid's courage.

However, courage alone wasn't enough.

There was still a significant difference in strength.

Thinking about how Rita was forced into defensive retreat the entire time during their spar, Mei was in a pretty good mood.

Still, she couldn't help but feel a bit puzzled.

Back then, she thought she had clearly demonstrated the gap in power to Rita. Knowing how calculating the maid was, Mei assumed Rita would quickly yield.

But instead, Rita stubbornly resisted with unwavering determination, fighting Mei until she was completely exhausted.

(Is she trying to prove her feelings for Elias through actions? No... this doesn't feel that simple.)

The next moment, Mei understood Rita's true intent.

Elias was staring worriedly at the maid's upstairs bedroom.

"To be tired to that extent... I can't help but feel worried. I'll go check on her personally. She probably hasn't eaten yet, right? Perfect, I'll take her dinner up."

"..."

Mei's eye twitched wildly, a faint crackle of lightning flickering through her hair.

"So that was your goal!"

Exhausting herself on purpose, just to gain Elias' attention? That maid was way too devious!

Seeing Elias head upstairs with a tray of food, Mei quickly tried to say, "Don't trouble yourself, let me go take care of Rita instead..."

"Mei, I... have something to tell you... is that okay?"

"Kiana..."

The paramecium took Mei's hand, clearly nervous.

A bad feeling welled up in Mei's chest. And now she had missed the chance to stop Elias.

She could only watch him disappear up the stairs to Rita's room.

"Eh~ Fine then. What is it, Kiana?"

"Not here. Let's talk outside."

"...Okay."

The ominous feeling in her heart grew even stronger. Mei sincerely prayed that it wouldn't be about Elias. Anything else would be fine.

(If you spare me this one time, I'll make you all the food you want tomorrow. Fried chicken, sweet pepper curry, whatever you like... So please, Kiana... don't let me down.)

...

"Mei, I'm sorry! I think I've fallen for Elias."

"..."

So disappointing.

Night at the St. Freya Academy's school building.

The moon was hidden behind dark clouds. Cold wind blew across the rooftop, lifting both girls' long hair and carrying a chill.

But no chill could compare to the ice in Raiden Mei's heart.

With one hand against the wall and the other covering her face, Mei felt utterly cold inside. At this moment, she had a strong urge to betray the human side and return to the Honkai faction.

And wipe out all the b*tches eyeing Elias!

Then throw Elias into a little black room so they could live a shameless and eternal life together.

"Ehhhh~~~~!"

Mei let out a deep sigh, staring helplessly at the paramecium in front of her.

"Kiana, do you really think it's okay to say that to me?"

"I-I know it's not... but I had to tell you, Mei. I'm sorry."

"Kiana, if I told you to give up on Elias, could you do it?"

"...Probably not."

Kiana thought about it and shook her head honestly.

She truly couldn't leave Elias anymore.

Too far gone. Beyond saving.

Elias' tenderness and doting had become a necessary part of her life—as essential as air and sunlight. She had grown too used to and dependent on him.

"So it really is like that."

Mei sighed deeply again.

Looking at the fluffy white-haired bundle before her with complicated eyes.

Even though Elias was the most important person to Raiden Mei, Kiana also held a significant place in her heart. After all, back in Chiba Academy—when Mei was at her most easily won-over...

Other than Elias, the only girl who had ever extended a hand to Mei was Kiana—the one who, just like Elias, brought her warmth and salvation.

In Raiden Mei's heart, Kiana was second only to Elias. She was an irreplaceable friend.

And yet…

"Why did it come to this... I finally found someone I like, a lifelong friend... It should have been double the joy, but now it feels like this."

Mei's eyes gradually turned hollow.

"..."

Seeing Mei—who should've been the biggest winner—looking like a complete loser, Kiana couldn't help but feel a heavy pang of guilt. She even considered kneeling down and apologizing to the purple-haired girl.

But it wasn't like she wanted this either!

Still... Mei's boyfriend is just too amazing!

After a moment of silence—

Mei took a deep breath, as if steeling herself.

"Kiana!"

"Y-Yes, I'm here!"

"Let me hit you. Just once."

"Okay, Mei, go ahead."

Kiana stood upright, bracing herself for impact. She shut her eyes tight, body tensed. But deep down, she felt slightly relieved.

If a single hit could settle this, that was way better than what she feared most: Mei breaking up—uh, no, cutting ties with her. Kiana felt she might actually die from crying if that happened.

She also held a tiny bit of hope. With her eyes shut tight, Kiana thought to herself:

(Mei is such a gentle girl. My best friend... she wouldn't really hit me hard, right? Eh~ even if it stings a bit, I deserve it. So come on, Mei! Give me your best shot!)

Rumble rumble—!

(Hm? What was that sound? Thunder?)

Kiana opened her eyes in confusion.

The next second, she saw Mei had already activated her Herrscher form. Crimson lightning surged around her, and her hand rested on the hilt of her blade, stance set for a Iaido slash.

"Chidori—Draw!"

In that instant, the paramecium was completely stunned.

"Mei, you're not actually going to kill me, right?!"

Kiana bolted.

"Don't run, Kiana! You agreed to let me hit you! Just one hit and I'll forgive you!"

Mei immediately gave chase, sword in hand.

"No way! Mei, that hit will kill me!"

"You deserve it!"

"Though... that's not wrong!"

And so the two chased each other around the rooftop.

Although the Kaslana family's physical strength was incredible, the Herrscher's speed was still superior. It didn't take long for the paramecium to fall into the hands of the cooking lady. Half a minute later…

"Uuuugh... it hurts~~" ╥﹏╥

A new bug-shaped hole appeared in the wall of St. Freya Academy's school building—courtesy of Kiana. She sat on the ground, clutching her head with teary eyes, not daring to resist anymore.

After venting, Mei felt much better. She had held back quite a bit—at least she used the scabbard.

"I forgive you, Kiana."

"Eh? Forgive me for what?"

"...Idiot. Don't make me say it."

Mei sighed, pressing a hand to her forehead.

She looked helplessly at the paramecium before her. The latter instantly understood, eyes widening before scrambling over to throw her arms around Mei.

"Thank you, thank you, Mei! You're the best!"

"Ehh~ having you as a friend must be my bad karma... Fine, fine. At least your attitude is decent."

Letting the paramecium hug her, Mei gave a wry smile and patted Kiana on the back.

She consoled herself: at least Kiana's attitude was good. Unlike Himeko and Bronya, who hopped on the train first and only came to apologize after the fact.

On that basis alone, she'd be the bigger person and reluctantly agree to share her most precious person with Kiana.

Besides...

(Maybe... maybe Kiana needs Elias more than I do. Given her background...)

Recalling what she had learned from Fu Hua about Kiana's true identity, Mei couldn't help but feel a twinge of sympathy.

The truth would come to light eventually, and when it did, Kiana would need someone to support her.

And Elias was undoubtedly the best, and only, choice.

Mei: "But I'm still mad! Ugh, I need to land one more hit! Wait—there's also that manipulative maid back home to deal with!"

So many threats to handle!

After a brief moment of frustration, Mei pulled out her phone and opened the forums, anonymously posting a question:

[My boyfriend is way too popular. How do I prevent my girlfriends from stealing him? Online now, urgent!]

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