Chapter 13: Because I like you, we are not lovers

[After everything was laid out, you and Sakura got to know each other better, and were more aware of the strange feelings between you - although you knew that this was just the result of someone's deliberate guidance, you no longer cared about it.]

　　[Well... although that's what I said, there may still be some grudges in your hearts. Now the relationship between you has only taken half a step forward, but it has not reached that level completely. There is a kind of "it makes people anxious to see" beauty. Uh... should this so-called "grudge" be replaced with "shyness" to be more accurate? ]

　　[On the appointed day, you brought Sakura to the city where Eden was holding a concert. In addition to enjoying Eden's singing, you also visited many places with her. At least at this time, you and she were not the killer duo that everyone feared. You were just a pair of friends who had a good impression of each other but had not yet come together for various reasons.]

　　[It is worth mentioning that at the concert in Eden, the two young men sitting next to you were one with striking white hair and the other with long grey hair.]

　　[The white-haired boy was very enthusiastic and gave people a very sunny feeling. When he sat down, he greeted you in a familiar manner, which left a deep impression on you.]

　　[The other gray-haired boy seemed very quiet, and his personality seemed to be completely opposite to his friend. Although his emotions could be felt, he did not show them very obviously, which was in stark contrast to the friend next to him whose emotions were almost written on his face.]

　　[It's a bit strange to see these two types of personalities together... and it's also very interesting. ]

　　[Sure enough, this is "friendship"...]

　　[However, rest time always passes quickly, and another mission has been issued, still a few assassination missions, which is not a difficult task for the two of you - although there have been some subtle changes in the relationship between you, but when you are "working", your attitude is still very positive]

　　[After that, you spent some time in bits and pieces... and during this time, something happened that made you a little concerned... or was it a piece of news? ]

　　[There was a major accident in Eastern Europe. It looked like a nuclear power plant exploded. At least that's what the news said, but you have a vague feeling that this is not right.]

　　[Sure enough, not long after, the people above told you about the special nature of this matter, and planned to arrange for you to join a new organization - the Fire Moth, which is responsible for dealing with a special disaster called "Honkai"]

　　[It's not like you're going to be an "undercover agent", you're just joining. In other words, you're entering the "Fire Moth" on behalf of the Poison Pupa, which has a symbolic meaning. Of course, if someone investigates, they'll understand that your joining is a demonstration and declaration by the Poison Pupa - the people above intend to use your sharp "knife" to gain more to say.]

　　[But now, those things have nothing to do with you. Your life is no different from before. It's just that you have changed from a "killer" who needs to hide to a "special operations team" that can be put on the surface, and the missions you perform are no different from before.]

　　[It's better to say that you have more free time. After all, when you can enter here with normal identities, it means that Poison Pupa has joined the "Fire Chaser Moth" in a relatively formal way. As for the subsequent process of fighting for the right to speak, it needs to be carried out "within the rules", and "outside the rules" like you two need to be used less... at least not at this stage.]

　　[Except for daily training and necessary tasks, you have almost nothing to do. Apart from making time to learn the latest information about "Honkai Impact", you can only walk around the base together.]

　　[It's just a little unexpected that you met her again here——Elysia]

　　[You still remember that it was an afternoon when you and Sakura were strolling in the Fire Moth training base - there was no purpose, just a simple walk. Many people have long been accustomed to you two. After all, the two of you were basically together all the time, going in and out as a pair. Although most of your colleagues have not confirmed it with you, they still regard you as a rare couple in the base.]

　　[Then, the clever pink elf appeared, with long pink hair similar to Sakura's and a faint, special scent, and came to you lightly]

　　[She chatted with sakura for a while first. Her initiative and the jumpy topics made sakura feel a little overwhelmed.]

　　[Perhaps she noticed that Sakura was having trouble following her initiative, or perhaps it was intentional, she shifted her gaze to you]

　　[When you saw her smile at you, you realized that she had recognized you. You just talked to Sakura just to find out what your "new friend" looked like.]

　　[Sure enough, she spoke, starting with "It's been a long time since we last met", and you responded with something similar]

　　[Seeing that you two seem to be somewhat familiar with each other, Sakura is a little surprised]

　　[She invites you to walk with Sakura, even if it's just for a casual walk - she really wants to chat with you, a friend she hasn't seen for a long time]

　　[You readily agreed, and Sakura nodded without objecting.]

　　[You two talked a lot along the way, although most of the time it was Elysia who was talking and you and Sakura who were listening. Occasionally you would respond with a few words - just like before.]

　　[Even if Elysia intentionally leads the topic to you and Sakura, you usually just brush it off.]

　　[She saw that you didn't want to talk more, so she didn't ask any more questions. Meeting again is something worth being happy about. There's no need to delve too deeply into what the other person has been through. After all, for you two, meeting each other again is the happiest thing.]

　　[However, as the communication time prolonged, Sakura's mood gradually became depressed. Elysia was a little concerned, but Sakura just said that she was fine.]

　　[sakura noticed your concern for Elysia, and could also feel your shrinking and embarrassment in front of Elysia - you even reduced the frequency of eating candy]

　　[Coupled with the fact that Elysia has similar long pink hair to hers, all of this makes Sakura understand who the person in your heart Poison Pupa wants her to replace is, and why Poison Pupa chose her as the "sheath" in the first place]

　　[Because she understood, she felt a little uncomfortable]

　　[Finally, perhaps noticing the awkward atmosphere, or perhaps because there was something else going on, Elysia left after saying goodbye.]

　　[Silence permeated between you and Sakura, but soon, you returned to the previous atmosphere, strolling around the base casually, as if the reunion with Elysia just now was just a small episode.]

　　[But you both know that your lives will definitely change in the future and the relationship between you...may also be changed because of it]

　　[you afraid that people in the Poison Pupa didn't expect that just by joining a special organization to gain more say, you and Elysia would be reunited. In this vast sea of ​​people in the world, it was just such a coincidence that you met again at a very delicate time.]

　　[It just happened that the time when the Poison Pupa tried to gain more power in the "Fire Moth" was a good time for the Poison Pupa to play. This special organization led by the United Nations and formed by many organizations is a good place for the Poison Pupa to play. Although the means "within the rules" cannot beat others, for those who are good at using tricks outside the game, the worst that can happen is to overturn the table - directly kill the opponent. And it just so happens that the sharpest "knife" in their hands is best at doing this kind of thing. Anyway, as long as there is no evidence left, it will be fine.]

　　[But now... after the emergence of Elysia, the people above will probably start to reconsider, because they are also very clear about the importance of Elysia in your heart - that is a "knot" that cannot be erased even if many methods and time are spent, and even some drugs that can directly damage the nerves are used. So in the end, they have to look for a suitable "sheath" to replace Elysia's position in your heart.]

　　[Unfortunately, this plan failed just when it finally made some progress and was about to succeed.]

　　[In that case, then squeeze out the last bit of value from your "sword" and the corresponding "scabbard"]

　　[So, your mission will become much heavier. Not only will you accept the assassination of "people" by the poisonous pupa, but you will also accept the mission of the fire-chasing moth against the special disaster - Honkai.]

　　[Who told you that you are one of the few people who can withstand the erosion of Honkai energy? —That's what they said]

　　[And the "privileges" you originally had were gradually lost - they did not directly cancel your privileges, but just shirked them, or used the information about "those guys" to lure you and force you to continue "working". After all, they knew very well that your hatred for "those guys" was the same as your cherishment for Elysia.]

　　[sakura and you also separated without knowing it, and each of you led a team... There was no crack in your relationship, but many times you were forced to separate due to heavy tasks. Even Sakura has not gone back to see rin for a long time, and can only rely on the pendant you gave her to communicate with rin remotely.]

　　[Yes, the cherry blossom pendant you gave me is a special communication terminal with a specially paired communication channel. As long as you connect to the network communication, you can call the other party. It is very suitable for two people to have a private conversation. Of course, this function can also be turned off to prevent certain "accidents"]

　　[In addition, the function of "projecting stored video data" of the normal version is also retained, so that when Sakura misses rin but the environment and time do not allow it, she can use the pendant to look at her memories with rin - of course, you are also among them]

　　[Sometimes you may feel that Sakura's behavior is unnecessary, and even gives people a vague feeling of "not being good", but according to Sakura, this can help her calm down and strengthen her confidence, so you just let her do it.]

　　[Of course, during the short break after completing the mission, you can still meet at the Fire Moth base, and then walk aimlessly in the base together, or drink a few low-alcohol drinks in the base bar - you and Sakura don't like alcohol very much, after all, it will affect your body, and then affect your performance in the mission, but it's okay to have a few drinks occasionally]

　　[By the way, the sakura wine made by Sakura is indeed delicious, and Sakura's cooking skills are as good as she said]

　　[Elysia is also indispensable during this journey. She cherishes you as a friend... No, it should be a pity. After all, she failed to help you at the beginning, which indirectly led to the death of Father Enrique. Therefore, she pays close attention to you.]

　　[Of course, she noticed that her appearance had caused trouble to you and Sakura, so she planned to talk to Sakura - she didn't want her appearance to destroy the relationship between you and Sakura, and she really wanted to send you the best wishes in that "dream scene"~]

　　——————————

　　"That's all, Elysia."

　　Sakura stopped walking and said to Elysia who was walking in front of her.

　"Just say whatever you want to say here."

　　"Hey~ But if we walk a little further, we will reach the sky garden. That is a place specially built by the Fire Moth for everyone to relax and rest. There will be wine or coffee to drink later. It is a good place to take a break~ Why don't you go and take a look?"

　　Elysia turned around lightly, and the pink ponytail tied behind her rose and fell gently.

　　"This was built by the people above for themselves, and we just enjoy it as a byproduct."

　　Sakura shook her head and said so.

　　"Sakura, please stop saying such realistic things. Be more romantic."

　　Elysia came closer and said with a smile.

　　"And maybe he'll like that place, too? Right?"

　　"..."

　　"Hehe~ Sakura is good at understanding~?"

　　Elysia smiled and took another step toward her original destination.

　　After hesitating for a while, Sakura finally chose to follow.

　　When entering the [Sky Garden], the hurried footsteps outside are isolated, and inside there is only comfortable silence and the fragrance of flowers and plants.

　　"Hehe~Hehe~?"

　　Elysia was humming softly and strolling in the garden with brisk steps, her pink ponytail swaying gently behind her, like a fairy among the flowers.

　　"Alright, alright~ If I delay any longer, I'll be hated by others. I won't do that~?"

　　After finding a place to rest, said this.

　　"So? Elysia, what did you ask me to do?"

　　"Oh, we're just chatting to get closer~ Does Sakura hate me?"

　　"…Not really."

　　Sakura shook her head. To be honest, Elysia was very likable. Although sometimes she was too proactive and made people feel overwhelmed, she was able to control the degree of it. It could be said that she was a person that was difficult to dislike.

　　"I'm just wondering why you came to see me alone."

　　"Did I disturb your date with Xi Wang? If so, I'm sorry~"

　　"…He and I don't have that kind of relationship."

　　Sakura was speechless for a moment after hearing what Elysia said. She shook her head, denying her words, and then added another sentence.

　　"Also don't change people's names casually."

　　"…I see. I'm so sorry."

　　This time, it was Elysia's face that froze, and her tone dropped a little.

　　"But, this is his original name, right? It's just that it has been changed now... Hmm..."

　　She probably understood why Xiwang gave up that name, but it was precisely because of this that Elysia felt depressed and felt a little guilty towards Xiwang.

　　"…I think I understand."

　　Sakura quickly guessed what Elysia wanted to do with her.

　　"Hehe~ As expected, Sakura is also very smart~"

　　Elysia smiled, moved closer to Sakura, leaned forward, and leaned close to Sakura's face as she sat next to her, and asked curiously.

　　"So, how much do you know about wang? I'm curious. What happened from the time you met until now? After all, you seem to have a really good relationship. You're not even lovers at this point. Not only me, but many of my friends are worried."

　　"…There's nothing much to say."

　　The corners of Sakura's mouth twitched, but she still said so.

　　"Do you want to keep it for yourself? That's great~"

　　"Elysia..."

　　"Hehe~ Okay, I won't tease you anymore~"

　　Elysia sat up straight, stretched a little to relax her body, and spoke softly.

　　"But I am indeed curious. After all, I have seen you two staying together all the time, even when you were on a mission. Everyone thinks it would not be surprising to receive a wedding invitation for you and Wang one day, just like Hen and Blanca."

　　Hen is the captain of the [Anti-Honkai Team] and a colleague of Elysia, while Blanca is the assistant of a doctor named Mobius in the [Fire Moth Research Department]. They are one of the rare couples in [Fire Moth].

　　"The relationship between Wang and I is a little more complicated than you think. As for the kind of relationship you think of..."

　　Sakura thought about it and finally shook her head.

　　"It wasn't before, it's not now, and it probably won't be in the future."

　　"Elysia, you knew Wang before, right?"

　　Sakura asked without giving Elysia time to ask further questions.

　　"He values ​​you very much because of something that happened in the past...right? So...can you tell me?"

　　"...Didn't he tell you?"

　　"If he doesn't tell me, I won't ask. He often says that his past is no longer important and doesn't act like he cares much about it. But I know that he still values ​​a few things from his past... One of them is you, Elysia."

　　"I see... that's not something that can't be said."

　　Elysia sighed and placed her hand gently on her chest as if to calm her rising emotions.

　　"After all... he is a rare person whom I have not been able to help..."

　　Elysia spoke softly, telling sakura about the time she spent with Xiwang in a gentle voice.

　　Whether it was the disgusting priest, the injuries Xi Wang had suffered, or the process of helping Xi Wang together with Father Enrique who came later - although they failed in the end.

　　She told them one by one.

　　"I see…"

　　After hearing this, sakura was silent for a while, then smiled with some relief.

　　She could understand why Xi Wang gave up his original name. Even if it was just discarding one word, the meaning contained in it would be completely different.

　　It's just like the funny pun name "HOPE". Although it does make people laugh and some people may even advise others to "change to a more normal name", that's because most people think that the name "曦望 (hope)" is too heavy and most people can't bear the meaning it brings. But if the person himself is willing to accept this name, others will just laugh it off and it's natural to change the name later - that's the case for others.

　　But for the person who has this name, changing it has a different meaning, because it means abandoning hope in a sense, especially when he was willing to accept and acknowledge this name in the first place.

　　Although it sounds funny, it is indeed the fact. After having the experience of [having hope and then having it crushed] several times, Xi Wang gave up this name. After all, he himself had never had it, so how could he bear this name?

　　And sakura could also understand why Xiwang attached so much importance to Elysia - she was his [anchor point], an anchor point that prevented him from collapsing directly in such a desperate situation.

　　At that time, he had to infinitely magnify the position of Elysia in his heart (and Elysia did help him a lot), so that he could withstand the various pressures and events that followed and persist until now.

　　Sakura could understand and even empathize with him - because she had similar experiences.

　　Sure enough, the two of them... are the same.

　　"Then... Elysia, as a gift in return, I will tell you something."

　　Sakura said in the same soft voice with a calm smile on her face.

　　"The relationship between Wang and I is not pure - this is true for both me and him."

　　"…Huh?"

　　"When I first met him, I was still in my hometown, Far East. At that time, my parents died early and my family was poor. I didn't have any special skills and could only struggle to make ends meet... Later, I was recruited by the local gang as a thug by mistake. Basically, I was doing jobs that could get me killed at any time and earning only enough money to eat. If Wang hadn't come, I'm afraid I would still be worrying about my life."

　　sakura spoke softly, recalling her past with Xiwang.

　　"Although others thought he had brought me into a worse environment, what happened at that time really helped me, not to mention that he helped me a lot later, and my family's life also improved a lot."

　　Because of this, she guessed that everything she and Xi Wang experienced later was secretly guided by someone, and she also guessed that she was chosen to be the "sheath" to store the "knife", but she still allowed her emotions to gradually change and spread in her heart.

　　"Although we were led by others after that, neither he nor I cared much - because we had no choice."

　　It is because they know everything clearly from each other and because they guess what those people want and what they are going to do, that they have to continue and are willing to invest their emotions in it.

　　His feelings for her gradually evolved from his concern for Elysia, and he was well aware of this.

　　Her feelings for him were developed gradually in order to protect rin from danger and allow her to live a stable life. She understood this very well.

　　"It's because we know each other a little better, and it's because we really like each other..."

　　It was precisely because our feelings for each other were not pure that he rejected me at that time, and I would not be too sad.

　　It was because we really had feelings for each other that he invited me in the end, and I gladly accepted the invitation.

　　If things continued to evolve like this, they would probably end up together, allowing themselves to be overwhelmed by this awkward feeling, allowing themselves to like, or even fall in love with, each other.

　　However, the reunion with Elysia interrupted this process and brought the two back to reality, forcing them to face the possibility of being torn apart by the poisonous pupa or even abandoned.

　　They have no choice.

　　"That's why...we are not lovers, and we will never become lovers."

　　She placed her hand lightly on her chest, caressing the cherry blossom pendant hidden under her clothes.

　　"It wasn't before, and it won't be now."

　　She was smiling, gently and calmly, even happily.

　　"And in the future... there will probably be no chance anymore."

　　But she looked so sad.