Chapter 1 : Love is painful
There is a girl I love, beyond measure, her name whispered in my every prayer. Was my love a mistake, or was she though? I sacrificed my world to enter hers, yet even the devil would weep at the depth of my efforts but she.. never. Despite knocking until my hands bled crimson, she remained unmoved, cold and indifferent as stone. A decade passed, then two—how long did I wait? Her heart, like stone, refused to yield to my love. I can only hope that someday, somewhere, she encounters someone who can thaw the icy fortress around her heart, for I know it can never be me. It was never meant to be me.
*Splash*
A stone dropped into the depths of the ocean, a silent echo of my turmoil. Once afraid of heights, now perched atop the hills, a sense of peace washes over me. Death holds no fear, all thanks to her. I would wish for death's embrace than a life devoid of her presence. For the first time, my heart whispered a desire beyond her—my own demise. Grateful for the strength she unwittingly instilled in me to face death, I offer thanks for all. Eyes shut, I capture the memory of her face one final time before taking the leap from the hill's edge.
As the frigid wind caressed my body, I gazed upon the scene with open eyes. Why now? Why appear at this moment? A pang of anguish pierced through me, yet a smile graced my lips as I beheld her presence. There she stood at the hill's summit, where I had just been moments before. Her gaze remained unchanged, as cold and indifferent as the day we first met… maybe a little bit more colder. I sacrificed everything for you, and now I depart, my final act dedicated to you.
*Splash*
In a realm beyond this life, if our souls should meet once more I pray earnestly for one thing—may the Divine decree that we never again walk the same path. The chill waters no longer sting; perhaps the ice that once gripped my heart renders me numb to their touch. Her image blurs as I sink deeper and deeper, yet strangely clearer than ever before.
*Splash*
Startled by the cold water, I sputtered and coughed, confusion clouding my thoughts. Who had rescued me? How was I still breathing? Amid a whirlwind of questions, a voice pierced the haze.
"Are you awake, queen? Or still lost in a dream?"
A flood of disbelief washed over me. "Mom..?"
The response was sharp. "Awake at ten o'clock and you still have the nerve to call me mom! Mom has passed on! You're still in bed. Where's the broom?" Her anger was palpable, standing before me was my young mom. Overcome with emotion, I reached out and embraced her. "Mom... I've missed you so much. Mom, I missed you a lot.. Mom, I'm sorry for leaving you alone in this house. You were always right... I've been foolish, easily swayed by others' words."
"Mom.. I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry.. I missed you terribly," I whispered as I embraced my mother, her presence a balm to my soul. Taken aback by the sudden outpouring of emotion, she stood frozen before eventually wrapping her arms around me.
"Zeya, what's wrong?" Her voice softened, her touch soothing as she comforted me. Silently, I shook my head and held onto her tightly. "Mom.. I'll never leave you again.. I'll always be by your side."
Recollections flooded my mind of the day I had revealed my decision to move to another city to be with the person I loved. Despite her heartbreak and devastation, my mother had stood by me. She warned me, she scolded me but she let me go for my happiness.
"What did you say?" My mother's voice cut through the room, prompting tears to stream down my cheeks as I clung to her. In her embrace, I felt a warmth, a sensation which I thought I had lost for forever.
"Mom, I'll never leave you again.. I'll spend my life with-"
*Thwack*
"Stay with me!? Who will tolerate a lazy girl like you!? You dare say this after waking up at ten o'clock!"
"Wait, Mom! I'm being sentimental here! Why are you grabbing the broom!?"
"Sentimental! Stay right there!"
"No, Mom! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" Confusion and disbelief engulfed me as the bizarre situation unfolded before my eyes. I'm transported back to the past to my highschool days before her and my path across, a second chance at life granted by some unseen force. Yet, a question lingers—why? The prospect of revisiting a life marked by agony, a journey intertwined with hers, is a daunting one. Must I endure the same heartache once more? What meaning lies behind this unexpected gift of a second chance at life?