Dragon prank
For you see, it happened that a yakṣa on patrol in the Jing River overheard the part of the conversation about not having missed a hundred times. He dashed back to the Water Crystal Palace and hastily reported to the Dragon King, shouting, "Disaster! Disaster!"
"What sort of disaster?" asked the Dragon King.
"Your subject," said the yakṣa, "was patrolling the river and overheard a conversation between a woodman and a fisherman. Before they parted, they said something terrible.
According to the fisherman, there is a fortune teller on West Gate Street in the city of Chang'an who is most accurate in his calculations. Every day the fisherman gives him a carp, and he then consults the sticks in his sleeve, with the result that the fisherman has not missed once in a hundred times when he casts his line! If such accurate calculations continue, will not all our water kin be exterminated? Where will you find any more inhabitants for the watery region who will toss and leap in the waves to enhance the majesty of the Great King?"
The Dragon King became so angry that he wanted to take the sword and go at once up to Chang'an to slay the fortune teller. But his dragon sons and grandsons, the shrimp and crab ministers, the samli counselor, the perch Subdirector of the Minor Court and the carp President of the Board of Civil Office all came from the side and said to him, "Let the Great King restrain his anger. The proverb says, 'Don't believe everything you hear.' If the Great King goes forth like this, the clouds will accompany you and the rains will follow you. We fear that the people of Chang'an will be terrified and Heaven will be offended. Since the Great King has the power to appear or disappear suddenly and to transform into many shapes and sizes, let him change into a scholar. Then go to the city of Chang'an and investigate the matter. If there is indeed such a person, you can slay him without delay; but if there is no such person, there is no need to harm innocent people."
The Dragon King accepted their suggestion; he abandoned his sword and dismissed the clouds and the rains.Reaching the river bank, he shook his body and changed into a white-robed scholar, truly with
Features most virile,
A stature towering;
A stride most stately—
So orderly and firm.
His speech exalts Kong and Meng;
His manner embodies Zhou and Wen.
He wears a silk robe of the color of jade;
His casual head-wrap's shaped like the letter one.
Coming out of the water, the Dragon King strode to the West Gate Street in the city of Chang'an. There he found a noisy crowd surrounding someone who was saying in a lofty and self-assured manner, "Those born under the Dragon will follow their fate; those under the Tiger will collide with their physiognomies. The branches Yin, Chen, Si, and Haimay be said to fit into the grand scheme, but I fear your birthday may clash with the Planet Jupiter."
When the Dragon King heard this, he knew that he had come upon the fortune- teller's place. Walking up to it and pushing the people apart, he peered inside to see
Four walls of exquisite writings;
A room full of brocaded paintings;
Smoke unending from the treasure duck;
And such pure water in a porcelain vase.
On both sides are mounted Wang Wei's paintings;
High above his seat hangs the Guigu form.
The ink slab from Duanxi,
The golden smoke ink,
Both match the great brush of frostiest hair;
The crystal balls,
Guo Pu's numbers,
Neatly face new classics of soothsaying.
He knows the hexagrams well;
He's mastered the eight trigrams;
He perceives the laws of Heaven and Earth;
He discerns the ways of demons and gods.
One tray before him fixes the cosmic hours;
His mind clearly orders all planets and stars.
Truly those things to come
And those things past
He beholds as in a mirror;
Which house will rise
And which will fall
He foresees like a god.
He knows evil and decrees the good;
He prescribes death and predicts life.
His pronouncements quicken the wind and rain;
His brush alarms both spirits and gods.
His shop sign has letters to declare his name;
This divine diviner, Yuan Shoucheng.
Who was this man? He was actually the uncle of Yuan Tiankang, president of the Imperial Board of Astronomy in the present dynasty. The gentle man was truly a man of extraordinary appearance and elegant features; his name was known throughout the great country and his art was considered the highest in Chang'an.
The Dragon King went inside the door and met the Master; after exchanging greetings, he was invited to take the seat of honor while a boy served him tea.
The Master asked, "What would you like to know?"
The Dragon King said, "Please forecast the weather." The Master consulted his sticks and made his judgment:
Clouds hide the hilltop
And fog shrouds the tree.
The rain you'd divine Tomorrow you'll see.
"At what hour will it rain tomorrow, and how much rain will there be?" asked the Dragon King. "At the hour of the Dragon the clouds will gather," said the Master, "and thunder will be heard at the hour of the Serpent. Rain will come at the hour of the Horse and reach its limit at the hour of the Sheep. There will be altogether three feet, three inches and forty-eight drops of rain."
"You had better not be joking now," said the Dragon King, laughing. "If it rains
tomorrow and if it is in accordance with the time and the amount you prophesied, I shall present you with fifty taels of gold as my thanks. But if it does not rain, or if the amount and the hours are incorrect, I tell you truly that I shall come and break your front door to pieces and tear down your shop sign. You will be chased out of Chang'an at once so that you may no longer seduce the multitude."
"You may certainly do that," said the Master amiably. "Good-bye for now. Please come again tomorrow after the rain."
The Dragon King took leave and returned to his water residence. He was received by various aquatic deities, who asked, "How was the Great King's visit to the soothsayer?"
"Yes, yes, yes," said the Dragon King, "there is indeed such a person, but he's a garrulous fortune-teller. I asked him when it would rain, and he said tomorrow; I asked him again about the time and the amount and he told me that clouds would gather at the hour of the Dragon, thunder would be heard at the hour of the Serpent, and that rain would come at the hour of the Horse and would reach its limit at the hour of the Sheep. Altogether there would be three feet, three inches, and forty-eight drops of water. I made a wager with him: if it is as he said, I'll reward him with fifty taels of gold. If there is the slightest error, I'll break down his shop and chase him away, so that he will not be permitted to seduce the multitude at Chang'an."
"The Great King is the supreme commander of the eight rivers," said the water kin, laughing, "the great Dragon Deity in charge of rain. Whether there is going to be rain or not, only the Great King knows that. How dare he speak so foolishly? That soothsayer is sure to lose!" While the dragon sons and grandsons were laughing at the matter with the fish and crab officials, a voice was heard suddenly in midair announcing, "Dragon King of the Jing River, receive the imperial command."
They raised their heads to look and saw a goldenrobed guardian holding the decree of the Jade Emperor and heading straight for the water residence. The Dragon King hastily straightened out his attire and burned incense to receive the decree. After he made his delivery, the guardian rose into the air and left.
The Dragon King opened the decree, which said:
We bid the Eight- Rivers Prince
To call up thunder and rain;
Pour out tomorrow your grace
To benefit Chang'an's race.
The instructions regarding the hours and the amount of rain written on the decree did not even differ in the slightest from the soothsayer's prediction. So overwhelmed was the Dragon King that his spirit left him and his soul fled, and only after a while did he regain consciousness.
He said to his water kinsmen, "There is indeed an intelligent creature in the world of dust! How well he comprehends the laws of Heaven and Earth! I'm bound to lose to him!"
"Let the Great King calm himself," said the samli counselor. "Is it so difficult to get the better of the fortune-teller? Your subject here has a little plan that will silence that fellow for good."
When the Dragon King asked what the plan was, the counselor said, "If the rain tomorrow misses the timing and the amount specified by a mere fraction, it will mean that his prediction is not accurate. Won't you have won? What's there to stop you then from tearing up his shop sign and putting him on the road?"
The Dragon King took his counsel and stopped worrying.
The next day he ordered the Duke of Wind, the Lord of Thunder, the Boy of Clouds, and the Mother of Lightning to go with him to the sky above Chang'an. He waited until the hour of the Serpent before spreading the clouds, the hour of the Horse before letting loose the thunder, the hour of the Sheep before releasing the rain and only by the hour of the Monkey did the rain stop.
There were only three feet and forty drops of water, since the times were altered by an hour and the amount was changed by three inches and eight drops.
After the rain, the Dragon King dismissed his followers and came down from the clouds, transformed once again into a scholar dressed in white.
He went to the West Gate Street and barged into Yuan Shoucheng's shop. Without a word of explanation, he began to smash the shop sign, the brushes, and the ink slab to pieces.
The Master, however, sat on his chair and remained unmoved, so the Dragon King unhinged the door and threatened to hit him with it, crying, "You're nothing but a bogus prophet of good and evil, an imposter who deludes the minds of the people! Your predictions are incorrect; your words are patently false! What you told me about the time and quantity of today's rain was utterly inaccurate, and yet you dare sit so smugly and so high on your seat? Leave here at once before you are executed!"
Still Yuan Shoucheng was not at all intimidated. He lifted up his head and laughed scornfully. "I'm not afraid!" he said. "Not in the least! I'm not guilty of death, but I fear that you have committed a mortal crime. You can fool other people, but you can't fool me! I recognize you, all right: you are not a white-robed scholar but the Dragon King of the Jing River. By altering the times and holding back the quantity of rain, you have disobeyed the decree of the Jade Emperor and transgressed the law of Heaven. On the dragon execution block you won't escape the knife! And here you are, railing at me!"
When the Dragon King heard these words, his heart trembled and his hair stood on end. He dropped the door quickly, tidied his clothes, and knelt before the Master saying, "I beg the Master not to take offense. My previous words were spoken in jest; little did I realize that my prank would turn out to be such a serious crime. Now I have indeed transgressed the law of Heaven. What am I to do? I beseech the Master to save me. If you won't, I'll never let you go!"
"I can't save you," said Shoucheng, "I can only point out to you what may be a way of life."
"I'm willing to be instructed," said the Dragon.
The Master said, "You are to be executed tomorrow by the human judge, Wei Zheng, at the third quarter past the hour of noon. If you want to preserve your life, you must go quickly to plead your case before the present emperor Tang Taizong, for Wei Zheng is the prime minister before his throne. If you can win the emperor's favor, you'll be spared."