Chapter 29

The journey back to Konoha, Naruto Uzumaki realized a long time ago, was almost always uneventful.

Nothing interesting ever happened. It was always when he headed out and on the mission. Never on the way back. He sighed out of boredom and looked back as he now walked back with two teams. Sasuke seemed disappointed and in a foul mood, no doubt he was looking to gauge his true strength. Kiba looked like she wanted to do more on the mission, mayhaps she wanted to discover something more about herself. Sai was, well he was a textbook standard ROOT operative; Naruto had to credit Danzo for making good puppets. Kakashi was walking beside him, his nose deep between pages 85 and 86 of Icha-Icha: Feminine Wilderness and yeah, Naruto understood why he was so into it. Kurenai was happy, no doubt enjoying the pounding he'd give her every now and then. Honestly the woman could've just broken up with Asuma, but she preferred not to.

She gets excited at the prospect of getting caught. Man, she had issues.

His own team was on a different wavelength. Hinata surprisingly was the most stable out of the three, witnessing death at a young age had some nice effects after all. Only if you're a ninja though. Sakura was understandably shaken up, still he gave credit where it was due. The girl had grown, she was stronger now. The trauma would pass, maybe this was the wakeup call she so desperately needed. Ino was, well, not being able to look him in the eye for obvious reasons. Though he didn't show any hints. Whatever happens, happens, a motto Naruto Uzumaki had been living by for a long time.

Indeed, the voice of the beast spoke. Who would've thought the child I was sealed into would so quickly realize his true nature this quickly.

You say child, fuzzy, Naruto answered back. But we both know those days ended a long time ago. I'm sure you remember.

I do. You humans are so despicable. Treacherous to your core. You preach peace and wage war. You who wanted nothing more than attention grew up to despise it. So you do see the futility of it all. Nine-Tails often liked to put all of mankind down. He wasn't wrong. There was so much horror with what man could do, but there was also so much good they were capable of.

Naruto's hand traced over his eye patch. His right eye, which he lost so long ago marked his growth. It also later marked his resolve and utter devotion to protect his village and its people. Above all, it told him to do what was right in his mind. Maybe so, but don't forget this, Foxy. Despite everything that's happened, we're still here. No matter how many lessons in nihilism you throw at me, I'm still gonna do what I do best.

Fuck, kill, repeat.

Okay, you're not fun to talk to anymore. Agent Orange, out. Naruto sighed as they reentered the village and dismissed his team. He, Kakashi and Kurenai reported back to the Hokage of their details and the old man, as usual, was impressed. Afterwards, the geezer monkey told him to hang back.

"So what are we waiting for?" Naruto asked. It'd been roughly three minutes of awkward silence. Knocks came soon enough and Danzo Shimura entered the room, trusty cane in hand. He sat down to face the Hokage and Naruto waited.

"Sit down, Namikaze," Danzo always referred to him with that name. The War Hawk of Konoha always prioritized lineage when he looked at a person. A shinobi from a civilian family was just a civilian in his eyes. A member of a clan however he saw with different light. Despite his mother being Uzumaki, it was Minato Namikaze that Danzo saw with more respect perhaps. That or he just didn't like his mother's rowdy attitude, which was famous in almost all circles. Sitting down, Naruto waited for the next order of business.

"Zabuza Momochi accepted the deal quite easily," Hiruzen Sarutobi relayed. His pipe was lit and eyes were sharp. "I'm surprised it didn't go south."

"Cornering him when he was still injured seemed like the right move," Naruto explained. "Kakashi and Kurenai being there helped. They could've taken care of the Hunter, who happens to be an Ice Release user, and I would've killed the former swordsmen."

"What did he tell you?" Danzo asked him. "Of their situation."

"Zabuza is, as you know, on the rebellion side of things in Kiri. Mei Terumi, a Lava Release inheritor, is their current head. She's been dispatching her soldiers to gather funds, Zabuza was one of them. While the rebellion is outnumbered in sheer numbers, most of those on the Mizukage's side are there out of fear and propaganda."

"Do you believe him?" Sarutobi asked him.

"Yes," Naruto quickly answered. "No one can to lie to me and get away with it."

Danzo looked at him sharply. "Regardless, if we are to aid the rebellion, we'll need to draw up terms. Assassination is not charity work."

Sarutobi chuckled. "On that we both agree. You know what to do, Naruto. You have some time so pick your choices carefully. Danzo will providing you with recruits too. Should the mission prove too much to handle, you know where your priorities lie."

"Of course," Naruto almost got up before Sarutobi beckoned him to sit down. "I don't have any more information to relay."

"This is about something else," Sarutobi took a long drag out of the pipe before filling the room with smoke. He then smiled, lecherously. "It's about your harem."

Naruto inhaled sharply and sighed. "For fuck's sake."

"Namikaze," Danzo looked at him with a gleam in his eyes. "Do not treat the matter this way. You're more than just a shinobi. You carry Uzumaki blood with you. Spread your seed, nurture it, strengthen it. Make Konoha great again."

Oh God, Naruto then proceeded to be grilled twenty more minutes by both Sarutobi and Danzo about how important it was for him to fuck, impregnate and become a young daddy before hitting eighteen. Times like these made Naruto Uzumaki not want to like sex. He walked out of the office, drained of all color and made it back to his home. Now was one of the times he badly needed a cigarette and soon enough when he got there he found another surprise.

Hinata was waiting for him with a bunch of people.

Inoichi, Kasumi, and Ino. All three members of the Yamanaka family. Oh no.

"Naruto," Inoichi greeted him. He didn't like the way mind reader was looking at him.

"Inoichi." He greeted back. He then looked at his wife, "Kasumi-san. Hope you've been well."

"That I have, dear," she greeted him back with a smile. The Ino-Cho-Shika families were always kind to him, more so when the Hokage made him do regulated visits to their places to learn more from them. "You're hair's too wild."

"I'll cut it when I get the time." Naruto put his hands in his pockets. "So how can I help you all?"

"Ino decided to move in with Hinata," Inoichi said the words with great stress. His teeth were grinding and Naruto internally sighed. His penis always got him into tight narrow corners.

...

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