Avery POV

I held on comfortably to Kai's waist as he drove us back to his apartment. The sun had already set, and there weren't very many cars on the road. The night air was cool, and though it had a slight chill I was kept warm by the heat that Kai radiated. Every now and again I would shift my hands, and with every movement I could feel Kai's torso tense up. The way he reacted to my touch sent a tingle down my spine, and it took everything in me not to push it further while he was driving.

 They say that love can make you look at the world through rose colored glasses, and in this moment I felt like I was experiencing that exact phenomenon. My fingers started getting slightly cold from the wind, and I slid my hands slightly underneath his shirt and placed my hands flat on his stomach for their warmth. If I closed my eyes it felt like we were the only two people in existence. The drive to his apartment from my house was maybe twenty to twenty-five minutes, but time seemed to be at a standstill while I was on the back of his bike.

 Eventually we ended up at his apartment. While this wasn't my first time here, it was my first time being aware. It was a decent part of town, a couple of miles from downtown. The area seemed to be old, but it was clean and well kept. There were little shops littered around the neighborhood, and aside from some people walking about it was rather quiet. Kai helped me off the bike, then helped me take my helmet off. He had me stand near a front door for a minute, and I watched him while a punched in a garage door code and walked his motorcycle into a small garage.

 "Ready to go in?" He asked, and when I nodded yes he took my hand in his, entered another code at the front door, and guided me into the building. There were a few flights of stairs that we had to walk up, and I remembered vaguely that he had carried me while walking up these stairs. I was doing everything I could to block out any flashes of memory that tried to surface, but it didn't work.

 After walking to the second story Kai took out his keys from his pocket and unlocked the front door. He held it open for me and gestured for me to enter, so I walked in with him behind me. His apartment was technically a studio, but it was rather big for what it was. They could have easily made this a two-bedroom apartment and still have plenty of space for the living room, dining room, and kitchen.

 "Sorry it's so small, especially compared to what you're used to living in. Since I live alone I haven't had the need to live somewhere bigger than this."

 He seemed embarrassed by his living situation, but to be honest this place was magnificent. It was probably around 1,200 square feet, give or take. The floor plan was quite open, and the only rooms were a few closets and the bathroom. Standing near the front door, the living room was to the right and the kitchen and dining room were to the left. Straight ahead there was a large, raised platform that had about three steps, and if you walked up it you would reach a king bed and two nightstands.

On the outer side of each nightstand were gray curtains that were hanging from the ceiling and hung about an inch from the ground. When I looked carefully I could see that there were dark wooden beams installed on the ceiling in a rectangular shape, and it allowed the curtains to be pulled shut which gave the platform an illusion of privacy.

In the back right corner of the apartment there was a room, and when I walked up to it and opened the door there was a beautiful bathroom. It had a large claw-foot tub that looked big enough for two grown men, a walk-in shower that was closed in by floor to ceiling glass walls. It had a small separate area for the toilet, and on the opposite side there was a mirror that stretched the length of the wall, with one large counter below it to match. There were two sinks, and the entire bathroom was a mix of black and gray. It was very modern and very clean. I couldn't help but think it suited a man like Kai.

"What do you think?" Kai sounded nervous when he asked this, but I couldn't help but be in awe at how comfortable and beautiful his apartment was. Aside from his bathroom the mix of blacks, grays, and olive greens made this place have a cozy cottage feel, and the open floorplan made it feel spacious. There were plants that seemed to have been lazily placed about, but they still held their own charm. This place was massive for a studio apartment, but even then the decorations and furniture were set up in a way to further maximize the movement and functionality of the place.

"It's wonderful, I love it. It has almost a minimalist feel, but there is just enough to also make it feel lively. Whoever designed it really put some thought into how they wanted it to look."

His eyes narrowed for a quick second, almost as if he was remembering something unpleasant, before he perked up again and asked if I was hungry and wanted something to eat. I told him yes, and I sat down at the dining room table while I watched him rummage through his fridge and pantry for ingredients. We made some small talk while he was cooking, and I learned that the people he lived with while finishing high school bought this place for him, and they were the ones that furnished and designed it for him.

He had been living here for around six years, and out of curiosity I asked him why he hadn't moved to a new place. His answer was not what I had expected. Kai said that he harbored guilt for the family he used to live with, and he felt like staying here was a way to not only keep their memory alive but show respect for everything they had done for him. On top of that, his mother doesn't work, and he is her sole provider when it comes to finances. Since he already had a place to live comfortably that was conveniently located near his work and other shops he felt no need to try purchasing another property.

"Why do you provide for your mother, when she never provided for you?"

The question rolled off my tongue before I even had time to stop myself. It was meant to be a mere passing thought, but I was angry over what he had told me and wanted to know why.

"I still wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my mother, I guess. My entire life she has told me that I am a good-for-nothing son, and that I ruined everything for her. I guess I just feel bad. Maybe if I was a dominant alpha, or if I had asked for things less, or I didn't complain, maybe then she would have had a happier life. I think this is my way to atone for the sins I unknowingly committed in her eyes."

Atonement for your sins, huh? That doesn't make any sense, but then again I knew his upbringing was anything but normal after we talked at the steakhouse the other night. I have never had a savior complex before, but I really want to save Kai from this notion that his existence brings ruin to those he loves. I wanted to try and steer away from such conversation, at least for the night, so I quickly changed the subject in hopes of lightening the mood a bit.

"That smells really good, what are you making?"

"Oh, this? Nothing crazy, just some tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. Oh, uh, I hope that's okay with you. It is quick and easy to make, and I feel like it's perfect for a chilly night like tonight."

"Not a problem at all, in fact I can't remember the last time I had either of those things. I used to eat it a lot as a kid though, so I am really excited!"

That was true, although I had a feeling I would like this a lot more. Growing up if we head grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup it would have been soup from a can and pre-packaged cheddar cheese slices with basic white bread. However, as I was watching Kai I noticed that he was homemaking the tomato soup. He boiled the tomatoes for a couple minutes, then peeled the skin off and put them on a baking sheet. He added some sliced bell peppers, an onion, one carrot, and seasoned it with some spices I couldn't recognize.

After popping them in the oven for about ten minutes he took them out, tossed them all in a blender, and kept blending it until the ingredients were smooth. He then poured all of that in a pot with a little bit of vegetable broth and a little bit of heavy cream. He seasoned it again and let it simmer. Then he took a huge loaf of bread out of the pantry, the kind that you have to cut your own slices from, and he buttered up each side, put a little bit of basil paste on the bread, and toasted them in a pan while he sliced up some cheddar cheese off a block. It didn't take him long to make any of this, maybe twenty minutes at most, but the food smelled and looked so good that I couldn't help but start salivating.

"Here you go, kind sir. Dinner is served." He said, while placing a plate and bowl in front of me.

He then served himself and sat across from me at the table. The food tasted divine, despite it being such a simple meal. I was looking forward to talking with him while we ate, but before I knew it I was shoveling food into my mouth and all I could think about was how good it was.

"Whew, that was amazing Kai. Thank you for dinner. I didn't know you were such an amazing cook!"

"I'm glad you enjoyed it; it wasn't anything special. I've been cooking for myself for quite some time, but I rarely ever made food for anyone else, so I was a little nervous."

He was obviously overjoyed by my compliments, and it was adorable to see how happy he was.

"Now that we are done eating, is there anything you want to do?" Kai asked.

"Nothing in particular. We can go for a walk or watch a movie. We can play a game too if you have them."

"Hmmm, well in that case, why don't I put on a movie for us to watch?"

"Sounds good!"

Kai had me go sit in the living room while he put the dishes in the dishwasher and put away the leftover soup from dinner. Then he walked over to one of the closets and pulled out a large fluffy blanket, and he draped it over both our laps after he sat down next to me. He grabbed the remote from the side table and turned on the TV, then started browsing to find a movie to put on.

"Anything you're particularly in the mood for?"

"Not really. I like all genres of movies, from indie films to blockbusters, mysteries, dramas, romance, action, horror. I don't typically watch movies often, but I generally enjoy any movie that I do end up watching."

"Works for me, I know just the thing to put on."

I take back everything I said. I have, up until this moment, enjoyed every movie that I have watched. However, it's only been ten minutes, and I can't get into this documentary about distilleries. I originally assumed that Kai put this movie on just to have some background noise, but a quarter of an hour later and the man still hasn't made a move.

"Hey, Kai-" I started to say while turning my head toward him. I was going to ask him if we could watch something else, but as I turned my head to speak to him he slipped his hand onto my thigh under the blanket, and then leaned in for a kiss. His hand felt cold and clammy, and his breathing was uneven. He must be nervous.