2 days later, on February 17th
,1941, I was finally released and sent back to work at exactly
4 am when roll call started. I was rushing to roll call so as to not be late and luckily, I arrived
on time. When Otto called out my name and I said 'Present', he looked at me,
deeply in my eyes, and started smiling.
"Don't fucking smile at me, you bastard," I whispered under my breath.
He stared at me and smiled for almost 30 seconds before continuing.
His smiling freaked me out, it was as though he was smiling because he knew that I
would not be smiling, I was confused, to be honest, but also worried, what was he going do
to me? Why was he going to do that to me? When was he going to do that to me? These
were all questions that I asked myself. He was smiling at me, like a Hyena, laughing at the
lion cub before putting an end to its life, and I knew that. His smile alone would absolutely
drop anyone to their knees and make them have a Goddamn heart attack, but I resisted
doing that, nonetheless, he still scared the shit out of me
Roll call was finally over and I was at my work site and unfortunately all my 'friends' were
transferred to a different station for the day.
That same day, Wrexham Braun was instructed to guard my workstation for the day, and he
recognized my face (from when I was getting beat down), he then came up to me,
"Attention!" He shouted in my ear.
"Yes sir?" I was startled and confused. His scream did wake me up to be fair so, I am
thankful, ha-ha.
He then whipped me on the back with a whip causing my back to start bleeding. I was still
in a state of confusion and shock and I didn't know what to do so I went on my knees and
started begging.
"Please, please! Not again!" I begged.
"I'll kill you too, Wrexham!" That was what I was thinking whilst saying those words, it was a
good thing that I didn't think out loud, otherwise I would've probably been killed.
Wrexham didn't stop however, he was emotionless, whipping me repeatedly, to the point
where my thin jacket ripped and my shirt, leaving me topless with visible marks and blood
running down my back.
"There we go, that's better." He said without a specific tone and then he went back to the
watchtower.
"How can you be so cruel?" I asked Wrexham yet ignored me and continued walking. He
showed me mercy, he could've, and usually would've, killed me and give a perfect reason
as to why, but no he decided to show me... mercy, but what even is mercy? If it only holds
us back from dying and achieving true freedom, is it really 'mercy', if I wish to argue that
point then I must also agree that killing someone would be merciful, but would it? I don't
know. My point is, was Wrexham really showing mercy, or was he not? (If he simply shot me
then, then I would've had to suffer the events that happened next.
The air was brutal, it carried the blood, sweat, and tears of my peers and it struck me in full
force, I was in so much pain, that I wanted to kill Wrexham right then and there, but I didn't. I
then started working but it was unbearable, it was torture, it was HELL. Every swing of the
pickaxe felt like a knife running through me, every breath of the cold air felt like a cup of
acid being poured down my throat. The gigantic building around me looked like an army of
Goliaths. The birds of that sky, Oh! The birds of that sky, how free and liberated they were if
only God showed me MERCY and swapped my life with theirs! The harsh flooring of the
prison was stabbing at my bare feet (Wrexham also confiscated my shitty shoes), it felt like
walking on an ocean of blades and glass. To top things off, it started raining! Ha-ha-ha, it
was like God wanted me to kill myself! The rain poured inside my wounds, making me light-headed and suicidal.
"I can't escape this hell... I am caged inside this place. Somebody get me through this
torture, please God help me." I whispered under my breath.
It was as painful as one million razor blades slicing your lips, slicing your face open, slicing
your stomach wide, slicing your neck off, it was unbearable. The cold rain hitting my
wounds was unbearable, I wanted to die right then and there, pick up the pickaxe, and
smash it into my brain! Watch as the blood flows out of my head containing my
conscience, and I would be free but it didn't happen, it was not yet my time, I wish it was.
On the other hand, Wrexham didn't want to do that, Otto was the one to order him. This
was evident, because whilst he was whipping me, I saw a tear fall, it fell and hit the ground
and splashed into a puddle, a puddle of my blood (He also told me the truth later on
obviously but for dramatic effect I said that). Wrexham was a good man with pure
intentions, but Otto tried to invade that, the same way the Devil tried to invade Jesus's heart
and conscience, but failed to do so. It was unfortunate that Wrexham had to do that.
It finally reached 11 pm and I was ready to go to bed, but before I reached my cellar, I was
hit in the head with a bat and then woke up in an office. It was Otto and Wrexham, they
kidnapped me (Ish) and took me to their office where... they did unspeakable things to me.
"Sir... he finally woke up." Wrexham was hesitating to alert Otto about my awakening but did
it in the end.
It was almost as if he didn't want me to wake up so that I wouldn't have to suffer what
would happen next, Wrexham was a good person, he really was, I had judged him too
quickly, it was Otto who enforced evil onto him.
"Oh, that's good, thank you for your help kiddo, but you have to watch, unfortunately." Otto
stated.
"But-" Wrexham tried to counter but failed to do so.
"No buts, you are watching this. You need to understand what filthy and worthless Jews
like this one over here deserve. Did you forget, cousin? Did you forget what they did to our
family?" Otto leaned in closer and was face to face with Wrexham-
"Did you forget how they sent our family in poverty, hm? Your Dad and my Mum were
siblings who struggled because of people like him and I had to grow up living in shit and so
did you! -" Otto started to get progressively louder,
"Don't you dare forget! Remember, remember the tears of your mother, remember them, and remember her tears when your father died due to poverty, don't you dare let that
source of motivation go to waste!" He screamed in Wrexham's face. Otto's words were like
poison, poison seeping itself into the heart of an innocent little rabbit and infecting it with
death!
Wrexham was now grunting and was looking at me like I did it. He was manipulated into
believing that Jews were responsible for backstory. Otto was so cruel; he was willing to
even manipulate his own family! His family for crying out loud! How dare he! How dare he
manipulate a young and fragile Wrexham (at that time, he recently just turned 16), I
should've slashed Otto's throat right then and there.
"I'll let you get the first hit, go for it," Otto said Nonchalantly (it was one of his
manipulations techniques).
Wrexham, being manipulated and not knowing any better, went up to be and gave me one
punch, then another, and another, and one more. He then went and sat on a chair and was
idle.
"Good boy, Wrexham-" I cut off Otto before he continued
"AH!" I screamed in pain as Wrexham hit the spot where Otto smashed the bottle,
and the pain just kicked in. Otto started growling like a dog, growling at the human before
attacking. I had just realized what I'd just done, I was petrified, shaking in my seat with
fear, and had tears dripping down my cheek. I was an innocent child staring at the murder,
"Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, that's funny, it is-" He got a pair of pliers and ripped off a nail from
my hand and covered my mouth with his hands, so I didn't scream,
"Sh, sh, sh, sh, we don't want to wake up the other guards now, do we? Ha-ha. Yes, let me
see your blood leak, LET ME SEE YOU CRY! HA-HA-" He then grabbed a razor and slashed it
slowly and deeply down my cheek,
"-Remember this Berg, I won't kill you, but I'll make you wish you were dead-" He then went
in deeper and deeper with the blade to the point where there were 2 flaps of my left cheek
flapping around like the wings of a bird.
I started whimpering and crying tears of pain, I cried.
"YES, CRY, LOUDER, HARDER!" Otto exclaimed with excitement and impatience. He was
excited that I was crying? Such a crazy man.
The pain was just too much, too much for a young boy like me, and I didn't even do
anything that deserved that much retribution! Was that the price of freedom? Is the price of
freedom, endless amounts of suffering? No, it is not, because I've suffered so much yet I
am yet to be free, I am a slave to my mind, and even now (as an old man) I still have dreams of
the traumatizing things that happened in that God-Forbidden hellhole! I still vividly
remember everything! Yet I fail to remember the good things that happened in my life
before the camp. All those precious memories from when I was a child, all flushed down
the toilet and forgotten forever!
Wrexham then proceeded to run to the window, open it and throw up. He then turned to
face Otto,
"You are a disgusting, horrible, shitty man who is sent from the devil himself! FUCK YOU
AND YOUR MUSTACHE!" Wrexham shouted with so much might that it could've shattered
windows. He then proceeded to exit the scene (To be fair, Otto's Mustache was quite
ridiculous, spanning from one end of his face to the other).
"Wrex- Oh well, he'll cave in one day, right Berg? He just doesn't understand our past yet,
but trust me, I'll Mold him into my own superweapon that will annihilate any Jew he sets his
eyes upon." Otto said menacingly with a smile beginning to spread from one ear to
another. He was planning to manipulate and control Wrexham even more, and it was my
mission to stop it.
After he said those words, he dipped his hand in a bucket of salt water and proceeded to
rub his salty hands on my open cheek. It hurt; I don't want to say how bad it hurt because I
am sure I've already painted an image in your dog mind of how bad all the torture was, to
say the least, this was probably the most painful physical thing I've ever felt in my life. Otto
still had his hand on my mouth and all I did was whimper like a little bitch.
Otto pushed his hair out of his face,
"Go to the nurse's office, Now!" Otto exclaimed.
By that time, I was already knocked the fuck out because of the pain so I wasn't
responding, so Otto simply dragged me across the floor to the nurse's office. While I was
there, she stitched my face up and literally just did that. She didn't give me any anti-infectants or any pills or care, she just stitched me up and sent me to my cellar.
It was 3 am, the dead of the night, I was in a deep sleep, not even church bells could've
woken me up, but Dina could've. Dina came into my room and tapped me on my shoulder.
I was covering my face with the blanket and thought it was a guard, so (due to trauma), I
screamed, whimpered, and jumped out of bed,
"Woah! Johan, it's just me, calm down, calm down!" Dina exclaimed sounding worried and
confused. Poor Dina, the love of my life was probably very scared and confused and I hate
the fact that I caused it.
"Please! No more! NO MORE, I BEG YOU! You've done enough... you have done enough." I
said with tears flowing down my left cheek (the scarred one) onto the floor.
I then fell sideways on my face,
"Please, stop it, show me mercy, SHOW ME MERCY, YOU STUPID FUCKING NAZI BASTA-"
"Johansen! It's me, Dina, please calm down, sweetheart. You're safe now, safe in my
hands, they won't reach you in here." She said with the voice of an angel, she was like an
angel that descended for a broken man, ready to help him.
"Dina, is that you? Is it-" My voice started to crack,
"He treated me like an animal" I cried. "Why!? He even cut my face, like I was some pig at
the butcher, like a pig! And why? Because I'm Jewish, that is the only reason why." I cried
once more.
"Oh, Good God, why has this happened?! It okay now Joha-"
There was a knock on the door. My eyes lit up and my face became pale, and so did Dina's,
but unlike me, Dina prepared for a fight whilst I just laughed.
"It's a guard," Slipped out of my mouth, "It's over, It... is finally over," I started laughing,
Dina looked at me with sorrow and tears flowing down her face, she then hugged me, and I
was just laughing, laughing like a maniac.
"Let me in, Johansen." Said the guard through the door. His voice was familiar indeed and
it lit a spark of curiosity in me so I stood up and opened the door, and behold! It was
Wrexham,
"Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, death has finally arrived-", I fell on my knees, "Let me die
now, let me die now!" I said peacefully. Dina was right next to me ready to fight.
Ha-ha, she was ready to fight, damn it! Holy hell, she was an excellent woman, such an
excellent woman, if only she was here now.
"I don't want to fight... I want to talk." Wrexham said calmly.