Part 23: Asamura Asuka Wants To Talk

After my counseling session with Mr. Hirashi, I went straight to my classroom and plopped down on my desk, and covered my head with both of my arms. The worst thing about him is that once you show even a little bit of vulnerability, he will absolutely tear you apart.

Let's talk about your inability to connect with other people. When he started the session off with that, I knew I was going to get my psyche dismantled yet again. I'm already so tired that I feel like the slightest gust of wind is going to blow me away across the four oceans of the globe. Actually, that sounds kinda nice.

"Hey, you okay? You're not dead, are you?"

I hear a female voice emanating from over me. I'm too lazy to lift up my head, so I just turn ever so slightly to see out of my left eye the figure of Asamura Asuka standing there.

"Whoa, your eyes look even more soulless than usual. Are you seriously okay?"

Her look of mild shock somewhat irritates me. I don't know if she's asking out of genuine concern or mockery, but either way, it's annoying. And what kind of person just blatantly tells someone that they have soulless eyes? Is she able to say it because she doesn't see me as a person, but rather something akin to roadkill? That hurts.

"No I'm not. I just got verbally abused by the so-called guidance counselor."

"Mr. Hirashi? No way! He's the nicest guy ever! I mean, I can totally see it being the other way around, though."

You didn't have to add that last part. Thinly veiled insults hurt more than blatant ones. Though the fact that she can casually talk like this to someone she's hardly familiar with shows her mastery of the art of socializing.

After our first encounter outside of Mr. Hirashi's office, Asamura Asuka started to talk to me more frequently. It started off with simple hellos and good mornings. But now it has quickly evolved to small talk about random things, mostly initiated by her. I'm not at all used to anyone talking to me in class, so it's a bit off-putting whenever she comes over to my desk. Is this her way of trying to keep tabs on me and make sure I don't tell anyone that she often visits Mr. Hirashi?

Well, I guess I can understand if she's embarrassed about it and doesn't want her friends to find out. Though I am a bit curious what she has to talk to him about. She's popular, has friends, and is incredibly attractive. What could she have to complain about to a guidance counselor?

"Say, how long have you been going to Mr. Hirashi's office?"

After I said that, Asamura's entire body visibly jolted. She turned around and looked from side to side, as if trying to catch anyone who might have heard what I said. I wanted to assure her not to worry, since I normally speak at a very hushed tone to avoid this exact situation. Then again, I doubt if that's going to dilute her paranoia even by a bit.

After ascertaining for herself that no one was eavesdropping, she let out a big sigh of relief. But that moment of relaxation was short lived, as her expression quickly changed into annoyance.

"Geez, Sugiyama-kun! Can you be any more of an idiot? You almost ratted me out to the class!"

"I'm pretty sure no one is interested enough in what we're talking about to even listen in. And even if someone did hear me, you can just deny it or make it out to be something else."

"Ahh… Well, I guess that's true."

She says with furrowed eyebrows and a lackluster expression that says "Why didn't I think of that?". Gauging from the few moments I've interacted with her, I've noticed that she's the type of person who gets convinced to someone else's way of thinking really easily. 

"But that's not the point! I'm telling you, it'll be bad if anyone else finds out about it."

"Right… Well, there is a simple solution to that."

She tenses up after hearing this, resembling a child eagerly anticipating a surprise twist from their favorite shonen anime. She may look drop gorgeous, but her demeanor is surprisingly paradoxical to her appearance. It kinda makes me want to tease her a bit, but I decide against it and just opt to tell her what I had in mind.

"You can just stop talking with me. That way, there's absolutely no risk of anyone finding out since we won't talk about it anymore. "

Her facial expression quickly changed from curiosity to dumbfoundedness, as if saying "What are you even talking about, you pathetic loser?" Was my suggestion really that bad? I thought it was actually logical. Plus, it'll get her off my back and not talk to me about stupid things anymore.

"... Or we could just not mention it when we talk? I think that's the obvious solution."

She says all matter-of-fact like. Why does she seem so insistent on continuing to talk to me? Does she actually like talking to me? Could it be that she likes me? Has my unique combination of pessimism and pastiness finally captured the heart of a girl?!

"I-is that so? Then tell me, why would you take that risk and continue talking to me?"

I've laid out a no-escape question for her; the type of question that will absolutely force an answer out of her. Now, tell me the feelings in your heart, Asamura Asuka!

"Well, Mr. Hirashi did say that I should keep talking and interacting with you because he believes it'll help me with the problems I'm having."

Of course all roads lead back to Mr. Hirashi!!!