Lust, Love and Something Else

Over at the bathroom, Sara washed off the makeup from her face then stared at her reflection in the mirror.

"...."

She wanted to say something but no words came out.

She then began to wash off the makeup on her hands vigorously, over and over mindlessly to the point she started bleeding

"You'll injure your hand at this rate"

"Adam? This is the girl's bathroom, dork"

"I'm outside, so it's alright"

I retorted as I stood outside the bathroom with my back against the wall.

"You seem to be enjoying yourself"

"Not gonna lie, on one hand, it's kinda nice seeing you getting knocked down a peg, but on another, seeing you this upset is throwing me off a little"

"Upset? What are you on about"

I glanced over at her face. She was indeed composed, smiling as though it was just another expected variable, seeming unaffected by this turn of events. However...

"Did you know your speech pattern changes when you're upset?"

She starts using 'vulgar' words like 'hell', 'fuck', 'shit', 'damn', etc. I've noticed it quite a few times including during our negotiation at the auto repair shop.

She must really care about her friends a great deal.

"Do I now....." She touched her face gently " I guess I'll have to work on that as well"

She walked towards the bathroom entrance, then sat down with her back against the wall inside before sighing.

"So tell me, you already knew she was the witch, didn't you? How come?"

"Is that really necessary?"

"C'mon humor me"

She said in a low voice, she wasn't pulling any tricks this time, she genuinely wanted to hear my deduction.

I guess she's wondering where she went wrong, what she missed.

"It's nothing all that complex, you might be disappointed"

"By all means, disappoint me"

Well, how can I refuse.

"I originally assumed you hadn't found the witch because you were one or you were protecting the witch, but that wasn't the case so how come someone as ruthless and cunning as you was finding the task difficult?"

"Ruthless? That's harsh"

"Doesn't change the fact it's true. Anyway, the answer is simple— It's because she wasn't on your suspect list to begin with"

"You weren't lying, that conclusion is boring as hell, fufufu"

" Hey! I'm not done yet"

"By all means, continue"

Geez... I cleared my throat and pushed forward

"Last year, there was an attack on the school meant to flush out the witch, which the student council president put a stop to it. But when you look at it objectively, why would he involve himself in such a dangerous situation when he's just a student? Did he feel obligated due to his position or was there another reason? Did he have a reason to act before that plan fulfilled it's purpose? Like perhaps, protecting the Witch's identity"

"This all sounds like hindsight bias to me, there are several ways it could be interpreted, your conclusion can only be reached after the fact. Unless... There was something else"

"There was. Infact, I only figured it out after our talk back at the auto repair shop"

"Is that so?"

"A star and crescent shaped tatoo on the buttcheek indicates the person is a witch. Naturally, the witch is aware of this and would try her possible best to hide it. However, considering her assailant is you, it wouldn't help much unless you were having an off day or there's another variable at play"

"That variable being I never considered her a suspect—"

" —Because she's your friend. For someone so ruthless, you're quite the romantic, aren't you?"

"..."

"Anyway, even so, there are very few opportunities to spot a mark like that— the changing rooms or during swim classes which you checked out throughly to the point you wondered if it was a hoax. The only possible explanation is the person never attended swim classes"

But how will someone be absent from swim classes repeatedly without raising suspicion? The answer is simple— it was considered normal for that person not to attend swim classes.

"The faculty staff and her close friends are well aware of her inherent fear of water, due to PTSD from her kidnapping several years ago so she's exempt from swim classes. Naturally, you didn't question it thanks to your naivety... You assumed she was actually just afraid of the water"

It's uncertain whether she's actually scared of water or it was a lie thought up to protect her secret— probably by the one who saved her no doubt.

That's right, the third witch, the Witch of Lust is the Student Council Vice President, Emilia Tyson

"Well, I guess I owe most of my deduction to Liz though, my whole train of thought was based on the premise that you're soft towards your friends— something I wouldn't have imagined in a million years if Liz hadn't told me herself"

I noticed Sara hadn't said anything for a while now, so I peeked over to check on her and she had a rather peculiar smile on her face.

A comforting smile, as though she was listening to her favorite bedtime story or a soothing lullaby.

"Sara?"

"Huh?"

She seemed to just notice that I was looking at her. She instantly tried changing her expression but failed, then she covered her face with her palm.

"Did you forget where you are?"

"Did you forget who I am? If there's anyone around, I'll know"

"You really have no tact"

"So, you feeling okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good now"

She removed her palms from her face, her 'mask' back on.

Come to think of it, this has to be the first time I caught her unaware while explaining my reasoning. I wonder, does she always have that expression when I explain myself?

No way, right?

"So, what are you going to do?"

"What indeed... She's got the most problematic guard in her corner after all, hmm ... what to do?"

"Are you really going after her even though she's your friend?"

"Like I said before, hunting witches takes precedence for me..."

Not how you phrased it but... okay

Is it really okay though?

"Then why are you crying?"

"Huh?"

She touched her face and realized tears were flowing from her eyes.

"I've just got something in my eye—"

"Even your lies have gone down by 20 levels. There's no one around, so you don't have to put up a front"

"You're here though"

"I don't really count as someone"

"Is that right?"

She kept wiping her tears but they didn't stop.

When it comes to achieving her objective, Sara O'Neil is ruthless to anyone directly or indirectly in her way as long as she doesn't care about them.

That's what makes this situation interesting. When the one in her way is someone she cares for, what will she do?

"I've come way too far to stop now. Geez, is this karma or some sort of divine retribution? I hurt tons of people to get this far, all for the sake of hunting the witches, I can't stop now... Even if...."

She gave up on wiping her tears and was obviously crying, I couldn't tell for sure but it seemed like some feelings she'd kept bottled up for a while— far longer than we've known each other burst forth, as she completed her sentence which evoked an emotion I couldn't identify

"...Even if she was my first real friend"

All records prior to her high school debut was forged which raises the question "what kind of life did she lead before now"?

If it was something that had to be erased, it was no doubt not an easy life.

And now the first person she could call a friend in her new life turned out to be one of the people she despises? What a farce.

Sounds like the plot twist of a third rate mystery novel, Sigh...

"Never knew you could be logical, Sara"

"Shut up"

"Everything you do defies common sense, every move you make are calculated but illogical. Your like a wild beast who transforms logic to chaos, an unpredictable monster, an illogical phantom, a demon that overturns common sense..."

" Rude"

I took a knee to match her at eye level

"...Which is why a logical answer doesn't suit you."

"Are you telling me to let her off the hook?"

"No"

"You're annoying"

"At the very least, the first decision you should make is leaving this bathroom"

I placed a canned drink I had in my hand all the while at the entrance floor, right outside the bathroom.

"If you decide to let her go, I won't complain and neither will Eleanor—she seems too scared to defy you anyway. And if you decide to take her on, I don't mind being your pawn just this once"

"That hero complex could be the death of you"

"This isn't a complex, I'm just really interested in path you decide."

I got up and prepared to leave her to her thoughts when she asked.

"Which path would you choose if you were me?"

I didn't turn back to look at her as I replied, I wanted to avoid my true answer from reaching her.

"I am not you and I never will be, which is why the decision isn't in my hands"

I dropped that line then slowly walked off with my hands in my pocket.

As for my true answer, or rather, the answer I want her to reach.... It's to go after the witch of lust regardless.

But not a half-hearted advance, I want her to give 100 percent into it.

My reason? Despite what I say, I agree with her logic— she's done way too much to give up now. As for my second reason, it's not one I'd ever utter to anyone...

"Adam"

"Huh"

She flashed her regular mischievous smile, though this time, due to the aftermath of her crying, it looked slightly different....

Genuine. Or dare I say, beautiful.

"You're still mad I said the four eyed freak will beat you hands down"

Not how you phrased it but.... I am quite petty myself.

"You always have to have the last laugh, don't you?"

"Fufu, I am an illogical phantom after all"

She really is an enigma. A puzzle I can't solve. Every time I think I'm one step closer to her true nature, I'm hit with at least five more contradictions or inconsistencies. For every fact I discover about her, I'm left with more questions In their place.

Who is she? Where did she come from? What is her motivation? What makes her tick?

My curse has been nothing but trouble, sending unfiltered noise and damaging possible relationships.

However, every now and then, I find myself wishing I could read her mind.... And unlock all her secrets.

★Eleanor Clarke's POV★

15 minutes ago

That glare of hers definitely shaved some years of my life, sigh... How did I end up like this?

I glanced over at the blond boy standing beside me, staring at her as she walked away.

"What's with that weird smile?"

I asked him. His smile faded instantly as he turned to face me

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"Don't 'what are you talking about?' me. I saw it clearly, you were smiling, full on smiling. Are you a masochist? Is that what you are? Did her scary side awaken something in—"

"Calm down, gosh. It's nothing like that"

" Then what is it?"

"It's just even now, her reaction was nothing like I expected. I couldn't predict her right till the very end. Sigh... Absolute defeat really sucks"

"Smiling in the face of defeat? Then you really are a M—"

"No. It's more like that feeling in gambling where you lose badly but you feel you were so close to win that you get pumped to try again... A branch of the gambler's fallacy I think"

"Oh, I see.... You're not a masochist, you're just stupid"

"Maybe I am"

He responded, looking up at the ceiling with a self deprecating smile, then he repeated himself in a lower tone "maybe I am"

I was expecting some witty comeback or a dig about my proportions but not this... What's up with him?

"Well, I need to buy a drink so go on ahead of me"

He said, faking a smile

"You're.... going to Ms— to Sara, aren't you?"

"Was it really that obvious?"

"Why?"

He didn't even stop to think before he replied

"It's like I said, absolute defeat sucks. I've gotta at least predict her once to be satisfied, it's my own gambler's fallacy"

He turned his back on me and began to move to her. In that moment, something I didn't expect slipped right through my lips

"Aren't... you scared?"

"Huh?"

What am I saying?

"Doesn't she terrify you? How can you run to her so carelessly? Aren't you scared of death?"

After all, you don't know about that, so how come you can approach her so carelessly?

What am I saying? Stop. At this rate, she might really kill me.

Breathe, breathe, breathe... Oh n, it's hard to... I can't, I can't breathe.. is this...a panic attack?

It feels scary, I don't want to di—

*CLAP.

A single clap brought me back to my senses, then I watched as he placed one hand on my shoulder and the other at my eye level, motioning the timing for my breathing.

"Cup your hands and put them near your face, then breathe.... 1, 2, 1, 2..."

I calmed down a little after that.

"Are you okay?"

He asked, but I ignored it and instead asked

"Why.... aren't you scared of her?"

"The better question is why are you?"

He retorted with a curious expression.

Ofcourse.... She doesn't expose her darkness to the ones she cares about. I should've known.

I felt the urge to tell him how terrifying she could be, air out her dirty secrets till I could no longer speak but I didn't... I couldn't.

Even though she wasn't here, I could feel her presence— almost as though her palm was caressing my heart, ready to crush it if I tell him.

Ofcourse I knew that wouldn't happen, there's no way she'll let me off that easily. If I speak, she'll do far worse than I can imagine.

.

.

He took me to the library where he dropped a canned drink he bought on the way beside me and headed out with the other in hand.

"Just what the hell is wrong with me"

I muttered.

I lay in the library, a mere spectator of the story of a girl who forced herself to become a monster to protect the ones she loves and the boy who chases her out of curiosity, but is ironically ignorant of her efforts and oblivious to the pain and tears that lurk underneath her seemingly evil smile.

★★★ Adam Graves POV ★★★

After my talk with Sara, I stood on the rooftop looking into the distance.

"I wonder what answer she comes up with? Will she choose the path I intended—to hunt her friend down, ruthlessly with everything she's got, Will she choose friendship over her obsession or.... Will she arrive at a third path, an answer I can't predict? The anticipation is killing me"

The first path is indeed the one I want, the one I'll be satisfied with because it gives me a reason to challenge Bruce King and yet...

"What the hell is wrong with me? A path where two friends tear each other apart? I'm becoming more and more like Sara with each passing day"

No.... More like my previous self before I got cursed— Full of arrogance, prideful with zero empathy and ruthless as long as I had fun in some way.

"Sigh, a fresh start was one of the reasons I came to Stone Valley. Maybe Eleanor is right, I really am stupid."

*Creak...

" I had a feeling I'd find you here"

Rachel said as she opened the door. She threw me a canned coffee and walked up right next to me.

"Sorry for worrying you" I said.

"I'm not.... worried. Though you still have that gloomy look you had on Saturday. If you want to talk, I'm willing to lend an ear. Who knows, I might even bestow on you some words of wisdom as a senpai"

Another person who seems to be able to read me to some extent— I wonder if it's thanks to Liz's influence?

"If you're already mixing up languages, I'm worried about your entrance exam"

"I'm chatting with you right now so it's okay to mix things up"

"Is that so, well, what did you do yesterday?"

"Binge watched an anime with Liz"

"Here's a thought— Why not study?"

"It was a much needed break"

Then why go mountaineering?

"Well , what were you watching"

After this whole Michelle fiasco, I need a break myself. Maybe I'll binge what they—

"Rainbow overflow"

Hmm... Haven't heard of it, guess I'll.... Wait.

If I haven't heard of it, why is it vaguely familiar.

Hm.. if I remember correctly , the mangaka who drew Ero Knight used to work as an assistant for...

Wait.

"Hey Rachel"

"Yes?"

"Are the protagonists two guys— one with blond hair and the other with long black hair and piercings?"

"Yes, why do you ask?"

Liz, are you trying to corrupt your 'big sis'? That's a BL h*ntai for crying out loud.

"Did Liz select it herself?"

"No, I found it in her room so I thought it'd be fun to binge together"

I'm guessing once she started, she was too stubborn to change the anime. Or perhaps she fell into the Rabbit hole and couldn't crawl back out.

What a drag, but it sounds just like her haha....

"Your mood seems to have lifted a bit"

"A little, yeah. Well since you're still giving free advice..... Let's say there was a guy who used to be a an absolute scumbag and now he trying to change, what can he do?"

Rachel took a moment to ponder then said

" I don't think people can change...."

Damn! Instant fatality!

".... However, you can change how people see you"

" Hmm... Go on"

" How do I put it..... Think of it this way— humans have several complex traits which make up their being— some good, some bad and the ones you use to interact with others describes how they see you"

She raised up two fingers continuing

"The one the majority actively see are your active traits while your hidden ones are passive. Even though you can't change, as long as you interact with your positive traits, more and more people will start forming a favorable opinion about you and with time, you'll get so used to it that the negative one you used before becomes passive"

She interlaced her fingers and gave a warm smile

"While you can't actually change yourself, you can still change your image and be seen as a better person. And with time, you'll actively be one too"

"Hmmm...."

"I think the first step is identifying the action you want to avoid, then avoid doing it over and over till avoiding it becomes a habit. Hope it helps"

"It does actually, thanks"

"Anytime. I'm hitting the arcade with Liz after school, it'd be a nice change of pace for you"

She really does put me at ease

"Thanks. Oh, and one more thing, Rachel"

" What is it?"

She asked as I stood up and our eyes met, locked on each other as the wind blew past our hair and clothes and I uttered those words I've been holding back since.

"I like you, please go out with me"

She cheeks turned faint red as she gazed at me who stood before her. Her eyes filled with a mixed blend of emotions almost like a bouquet of flowers, and I, who disregarded logic and my curse taking the plunge in search for something real.

A fresh start, a new experience, a bond we can share even after she graduates...

The me who stood there with no strategies or tricks, honestly bared my feelings, awaiting her reply.