CHAPTER 32 : MEI & KHALID, ORIGIN

"Mei?" Khalid looked surprised as he carried a backpack and wore a gray shirt. Mei looked at him, equally shocked, wearing a black hoodie and jeans, her right eye visible through her hair, wide open.I... met the boy I used to liked."My dream is to be like the Armored Hero! I want to have powers like him and fight bad guys!" Khalid, a young boy back then, stood in front of his class, showing off his messy, poorly drawn picture of Beast Tiger's armor. Mei sat at the very back, watching Khalid from afar."Hahaha! You're hilarious, Khalid!" "No one can become a superhero!" "Booo!"The whole class laughed at him, but Khalid kept smiling confidently in front of them. He was so weird back then...There weren't many Chinese kids in that kindergarten. The ones who were there were mostly boys, and I was the only girl. I couldn't make friends much.I was always alone..."Hurry and fight back, Khalid!" "Hahaha!" "Where's your power?" The boys always played fighting games together, and Khalid was part of it. I always watched them from a distance; somehow, they caught my attention back then. Especially Khalid."O-ow... That's not fair, you guys have a team!" Khalid complained."Armored Hero doesn't have a team! We're the bad guys, so we're teamed up!" one of the boys responded. They punched and kicked Khalid.Khalid just held on, trying to fight back, but he was outnumbered. I wondered, is it fun playing like that? I didn't understand boys at all..."Hek... Hek..." Mei was walking to the bathroom but stopped when she saw Khalid crying under the sink."Huh?" Khalid turned toward Mei. He quickly wiped his tears and stepped out from under the sink, while Mei just watched him."D-Don't tell anyone!" Khalid said before running away, leaving Mei standing there silently.Weird... If you don't like playing like that, then don't play with them. Just sit alone like me.It's not that bad being alone... No one will bother you if you're by yourself.Eventually, Khalid stopped playing with the boys. He stayed by himself like me. He just sat and watched them play, with a sad expression on his face.Mei stepped out of the kindergarten's front door, glancing to the side. There, Khalid sat hugging his bag. Mei walked past him but stopped when she noticed his bag was torn at the part with the picture of Beast Tiger's armor."Go away... Don't look!" Khalid muttered, his voice hoarse. Mei glanced at him."They're just jealous of you... because your bag is cooler than everyone else's," Mei said. Khalid looked up at Mei, tears still streaming down his face."Why do you care about them? They're all naughty kids. If you want to be like a superhero, you just need to be better than them." Mei added. Khalid hugged his bag again and nodded in understanding.I didn't understand Khalid. I didn't understand most people. Since I was little, I saw everything logically. That's how my parents taught me too. My logic back then was... Superheroes are good people; they don't give up and always move forward. In the end, they win.If Khalid stays strong, he'll definitely win. That's what I thought."Tadaa! I bought a new bag, and this one is the new armor for Armored Hero... It's called Atlas. His strongest armor yet!" Khalid showed his new bag to Mei."Isn't that bag expensive?" Mei asked."Huh? I don't know... My mom bought it for me." Khalid replied with a smile.Khalid suddenly started getting closer to me, constantly telling me about his interests, especially Armored Hero. He was really obsessed with superhero shows back then...Sometimes, after finishing my homework, I would sit in front of the TV and watch those shows too.When I think about it, I realize I was actually happy to have a friend, and I wanted to understand Khalid's interests.Time passed, and we both entered the same elementary school, but our interest in superhero shows and Armored Hero didn't fade. In fact, I think we became even more interested.The difference was, I didn't show my interest as much, except... when I talked with Khalid."Hey, the new episode of Ms. Star was freaking crazy!" Khalid was excited."Language, Khalid, language." Mei said while reading a book."Oh, come on..." Khalid pouted as he sat in front of Mei's desk.Even though Khalid always showed off his interest in cartoons and superhero stories, he no longer carried his Armored Hero bag. But he still had his Beast Tiger pencil case, which looked worn out.There were also friends who shared similar interests with Khalid, so he wasn't entirely alone. Once again, I faced the same problem—it was hard for me to make friends in elementary school.I didn't have the same interests as other girls, and since Khalid was a boy, he spent more time with his male friends.Sometimes, I found myself alone again, but this time it felt different. I felt left behind, and it... hurt."Oh, Mei? What's up?" Khalid turned around while carrying his bag, noticing Mei panting after catching up to him."Let's... go to the bus together," Mei said."Ah... well, I already told Taufiq that I'd sit with him.""Oh...""Next time, okay?" Khalid walked off, and Mei just watched him leave.When I think back on it, one of the reasons it was hard for me to make friends was because I always had a gloomy face. People didn't want to approach me, and on top of that, I had this habit of always reading books and not paying attention to others.Khalid ended up finding other friends... Maybe I was boring... I don't blame him for being more drawn to his other friends...I... am boring.Excuses, excuses, excuses! Those are all just excuses...If I want friends, I have to stop being boring!"Heyyo, Khalid... What's up, brother?" Mei flashed a 'rock' hand gesture with a bitter smile, but her eyes were empty."Ah... Hey, Mei? What's going on?" Khalid asked, looking at Mei strangely.W-Why is he looking at me like that? I've seen boys do this with their friends all the time... Did I do it wrong?"I really liked Harumi's new shield the other day, I didn't expect her to have a Wild Card too." Mei tried to sound enthusiastic, but her expression didn't match the way she spoke."Oh... Yeah, right. At first, I didn't really like Harumi, but over time, she's on the same level as Haruto as a main character," Khalid replied.Alright... He seems to be enjoying talking to me!I kept acting strange like that until..."Mei... Are you okay?" Khalid asked as he sat next to Mei on the bus. Mei turned to him with a smile, her eyes still vacant."I'm fine, bro," Mei replied."Uh... Right..." Khalid crossed his arms, looking uncomfortable. Mei noticed his expression and quickly looked away from him."Am I... weird?""Ah... not weird. It's just that maybe I'm not used to seeing you like this. You've changed." Khalid replied. Mei lowered her head, her hair covering her face from Khalid."I just... don't want to be boring anymore. Khalid, you prefer hanging out with the other boys, right? I'm a girl... I'm not like them..." Mei lamented. Khalid looked at her for a moment and then smiled softly."Mei. I like you just the way you normally are. You're never boring. You're cool, you know?""I'm... cool?""Yeah... Like Dark Vera." Khalid compared Mei to a character from the Ms. Star cartoon."I like Dark Vera... Her hair's like mine.""That's why, Mei. Just be yourself with me. I'm sorry if I made you feel like you needed to change, okay?" Khalid reassured her. Mei nodded, and a small smile appeared on her face.We remained friends, even throughout high school. Not much changed, but I gradually made friends. Khalid, in high school, became more sociable, and he was quite handsome, so people were naturally drawn to him.I think Khalid knew that I wanted friends, so he introduced me to others and helped me make friends in high school..."Wow... Whoa, this chapter is awesome!" Khalid exclaimed excitedly while reading a comic book at a convenience store, with Mei beside him."This is a must-buy." Khalid immediately headed to the counter with Mei, carrying the magazine he had been reading."A new chapter for Zero Line?" Mei asked."Yeah. It's so awesome! Seriously." Khalid clenched his fist in excitement as they both left the store together.It was in high school that I started developing feelings for Khalid. And it wasn't just me... at that time.Khalid turned down a lot of people—he was quite popular. He said he didn't want that kind of relationship with anyone... I didn't think I stood a chance either."Moving?" Mei looked shocked. Khalid smiled sadly at her."Yeah. My dad's retiring, and he wants to return to my late grandparents' village. My mom and I have to go with him." Khalid explained. Mei froze.When we were in our third year, Khalid had to transfer schools. That last week together in high school seemed to fly by. I tried my best to spend the remaining time with him...Mei ran down the street in her neighborhood, spotting Khalid loading some boxes into a truck. Many of their household items were already in the back of the truck, and Khalid wiped the sweat off his forehead."Khalid!" Mei appeared in front of Khalid's house, out of breath and sweating. Khalid quickly rushed over to her."Mei?" Khalid was confused."Huff... Huff... Huff..." Mei tried to catch her breath, and Khalid just stared at her, his expression growing worried."Khalid, I—" Mei's words were cut off as she looked at Khalid."I just... wanted to say... goodbye." Mei sighed. Khalid gave a small smile, but his eyes were sad."Thank you... for being my friend all this time..." Mei added."Thanks for everything too, Mei." Khalid replied, and Mei froze upon hearing those words.Khalid.Do I stand a chance?We're too different; there are so many obstacles, but if I told you how I feel...Would you accept my feelings?"Khalid, we're about to leave!" an older man called out."Just a minute!" Khalid replied. He quickly turned back to Mei."I'm going now. We'll catch up through messages, okay?... Goodbye, Mei." Khalid said, leaving Mei silent for a while.I can't... I'm too scared to know. I'm scared to know how you feel, and I can't bear to lose you."Yeah... goodbye, Khalid." Mei replied. Khalid waved at her, and Mei returned the wave before he hurried back to his parents' car.This is for the best...I don't want to burden Khalid with my feelings."Kha...lid..." Mei collapsed in front of Khalid's house, hugging herself tightly. A few tears dropped onto the pavement.I still kept in touch with Khalid through messages from time to time. But life in the village kept him busy helping his dad in the orchard, so he didn't message often...And suddenly, by the end of Form Four, we lost contact.At that time, I was too focused on the SPM exam, so I could forget these feelings for a while. SPM was important, and if I didn't perform well... My parents wouldn't be happy...My SPM results were pretty good, and I managed to get into a decent college.It was in college that I reconnected with Khalid."My phone broke; it fell in my dad's orchard. I lost all my contacts and couldn't remember your number... Sorry, Mei," Khalid apologized, clapping his hands together."It's fine... It's been a long time anyway. How have you been?" Mei asked. They were both sitting at the college cafeteria. Khalid's expression turned a bit sad for a moment, but he forced a smile."I'm okay," Khalid replied. Mei noticed that change in his expression but stayed silent."Oh, that's good..." Mei said.Something wasn't right.Khalid was quieter... He didn't focus in class. Just seemed lost in thought...For some reason, I was scared to ask... Khalid and I hadn't spoken in a while, and I didn't know what happened during the three years we were apart.I didn't feel like I was someone worthy of asking the heavy questions.At the same time... I was facing another problem..."Chyou?" Mei was surprised to see her little brother Chyou standing in front of her house gate, dragging his suitcase with him. Mei rushed to open the gate, and Chyou immediately hugged her."What's wrong, Chyou? What happened?" Mei asked as Chyou's body trembled in her arms. Mei hugged him back as multicolored particles rained down from the sky, gently landing on them as they held each other.My parents are wealthy. They even bought me a house...But they're cold people. Ever since I was little, they only cared about academic achievements. Without results, they wouldn't even bother.Chyou had run away from our parents' house...He was being bullied at school. But even though he asked to transfer, Mom and Dad were too busy with work and ignored him.Chyou fell asleep, and Mei sat next to him, clenching her hands together.I... I don't know what to do.The people I care about are hurting or sad, but I don't know what to do...Other people's emotions, what's going on in their minds—I still can't understand any of it...I want to understand... I want to know...Please, tell me...Mei walked into a convenience store and spotted Khalid inside. He was reading a comic book with a small smile on his face. Mei's eyes widened, and she immediately approached him."Hey, Khalid..." Mei greeted."Oh, Mei? What are you doing here?" Khalid put the comic book he was reading back on the shelf. Mei noticed his action."Oh... I... I wanted to buy that comic," Mei pointed at the comic Khalid had just put back. Khalid looked surprised and handed it back to her."You... still read these?" Khalid asked."Of course," Mei replied.I lied.Since Khalid and I stopped going to the store to buy these comics together, I stopped reading them."It's been a while since I read these. Where I lived in the village, they didn't sell this kind of comic. I had to go far to buy them. Eventually, I couldn't even get them anymore..." Khalid explained with a sad expression. Mei just looked at him."But at least you still got to watch Armored Hero, right?" Mei asked."I've been so busy studying to get into college that I haven't even had time to watch that. My life since I moved... Everything feels—" Khalid stopped talking, and Mei wanted to hear the rest."What is it, Khalid?" Mei asked."It's nothing..." Khalid forced a weak smile.Why won't you tell me?Why...Am I not reliable?"Chyou, have you eaten?" Mei asked as she entered Chyou's room. Everything was untouched, and his suitcase was still unpacked."I... don't feel like eating..." Chyou muttered. Mei looked away and left the room.Please, tell me... so I can understand.