CHAPTER 43 : GIVING UP

The sound of police and ambulance sirens could be heard, and many people in the neighborhood came out of their homes to see what was happening. The police blocked them from getting too close and set up a barrier tape. An officer was taking pictures of Hazim's house, documenting the damage, the disarray in the living room, and the pool of blood on the tarred road."Make way!" Rose rushed in with Shaurya to see what was going on, her eyes widening as she saw Khairul inside the ambulance. Rose ran toward the ambulance."I'm his acquaintance!" she said, climbing into the ambulance. Shaurya scanned the surroundings and noticed a blood-stained blades. He approached the blades and recalled the blades Khairul could manifest from his arms."Khairul..." Rose looked at Khairul with a sorrowful expression. A breathing apparatus was placed on Khairul, and Rose noticed both of his arms were bandaged, but blood was still seeping through. She placed her hand on Khairul's hand."Hang in there, kid," Rose said.Upon arriving at the hospital, Khairul was taken to the red emergency zone. Rose waited in the hospital lobby while Khairul underwent an X-ray. Shaurya arrived in the emergency lobby, quickly moving toward Rose, who looked despondent."Sister Rose," Shaurya greeted."Shaurya... How did things go over there?" Rose asked."Everything is okay. But you don't look so good..." Shaurya expressed his concern. Rose sighed and looked down."What happened? Nasuha is missing. Khairul is in this state... Was it the White Tigers? It can't be... Why don't they just attack all the HOPE members? Why just Khairul and Nasuha?" Rose pondered, trying to understand what had transpired. Shaurya sat beside her and placed his hand on her shoulder."Sis..." Shaurya called, and Rose turned to him, her eyes swollen, her face pale. Shaurya hugged Rose gently, and she returned the embrace tightly."I-I... don't know... I don't know, Shaurya... I don't know... Uh..." Rose began to cry, and Shaurya patted her back."Yeah... I understand, I understand," Shaurya said softly.After the X-ray procedure, Khairul was placed directly into the critical care ward. His entire body was bandaged, he required a breathing apparatus, and he remained unconscious. Rose and Shaurya sat beside his hospital bed, and Rose opened the X-ray envelope, revealing Khairul's shattered ribs."The doctor said it should have been impossible for Khairul to survive... but he's a mutant. Looks like the doctor noticed that Khairul's bones are moving and healing on their own. This is dangerous... if people shouldn't know. Khairul will be in danger again," Rose sighed, putting away the X-ray image and rubbing her temples."Can we take Khairul out of the hospital?" Shaurya asked."I'm not sure... Ah, I don't know what to do... Where's Nasuha?!" Rose banged her head in frustration."Sister Rose. That's enough," Shaurya said, and Rose continued to stare at Khairul."Wake up, Khai... We need you to find Nasuha," Rose pleaded, but there were no signs that Khairul would regain consciousness.My life has been painful, without direction.I'm just living...Why did I survive that accident?Why did my mother have to die?"If you hadn't been born, Aina would be alive now. I wouldn't be this monster. Imagine it, Khairul... A life without you... Wouldn't it be beautiful?"What's the use of all this power?All that I've faced?If I can't even protect my own friends.If I can't protect the ones I love.Just let me die...Please, just die.Just die, Khairul...Don't open your eyes. Don't breathe... Don't let your heart beat anymore.Stop..."I love you too, Khai. I've felt this way for a long time...""This... This is happy tears. Hehe."Nasuha, you're so beautiful. I... almost forgot to hate myself when I see you.You give me a reason...I don't care what happens to this world. I never did.But you want to explain this world to me with your power. To be a star of hope.Nasuha, I'm not as good as you think... I've done many terrible things before you met me.I'm just like those damn kids who bully you. I hurt others... I haven't changed; my powers only allow me to hurt people.I can't help carry someone flying, or understand what's going on in someone else's mind, or strike as fast as lightning, or teleport to protect others. I don't have shields for people to hide behind, and I can't control shadows to create walls to protect the ones I love.I'm nothing special; I only kill, kill, kill, and kill. But you still hug someone as terrible as me...What makes me special in your eyes?Why do you look at me that way? Why do you say you love me?Hazim... I failed you. I put you in danger, put Nur in danger too... It's all my fault; this is all my fault.Khalid... I'm completely useless. You don't need me...Mei... You tried to help me, and I appreciate it. Thank you...Kyoko... You're loud and always tailing me with Nasuha, but I don't hate you... You always help me. I don't think I would have come this far without you.Chyou... I'm sorry I didn't try to understand you. Maybe we could be friends if I could speak better.Mikael... I'm sorry I couldn't save your daughter. I admire how you can stand back up after everything that has happened and make the tough choices.If only I could be a little like you all...I... failed..."No, Khai... You haven't." Mei's voice sounded, and Khairul turned around, finding himself in a Mind Dimension that resembled his messy old room."Mei?" Khairul was confused."Khai, your body has stopped healing itself. What are you doing? You're not giving up, are you? Nasuha is in danger. Your friends are in danger..." Khalid chimed in, suddenly he and Khairul found themselves in Khairul's old living room."I'm sorry too... because I don't know how to speak... and I'm confused... I know that..." Chyou appeared as well, and they were both on the roof of a building. Khairul remained silent."Come on, Khai... This isn't the time to die," Kyoko said, falling through the sky with Khairul."Get up!" Kyoko shot her lightning towards Khairul."Kid, I understand you're hurting... but if you die now, many people will suffer more. Don't leave those who need you. We need you, kid." Mikael caught Khairul in a pool of black liquid, pulling him to the center.Suddenly, Khairul was surrounded by all the HOPE team members, sitting down in the middle of them, under dim lighting."I put the heavy responsibility on you and Nasuha because I was scared. Because I didn't know what to do; fighting against Strays terrifies me... for myself, for the members under me. I should have been a better adult. I should have protected both of you better... but I didn't... I failed," Rose stepped forward, gripping her clothes, her voice becoming hoarse. Khairul raised his head slightly."Please... Khairul... save Nasuha... I'm begging you." Ehsan also manifested, sitting in front of Khairul, their faces almost touching. Ehsan looked sorrowful and desperate, while Khairul appeared vacant, devoid of emotion."I... can't... I can't win... against him." Khairul raised both of his hands, clenching them tightly, but nothing came out except for blood flowing from where the blade would emerge from his arms."I'm not a mutant anymore... I don't have any weapons... powers... to fight... I'm useless... I'm weak..." Khairul sighed. Drops of blood fell to the floor, and Khairul fell weakly before all the HOPE team members, Rose and Ehsan."Just let me die. I was meant to die anyway. You can read my mind, right, Mei? Just take what you need... Just let... me... die..." Khairul pleaded."Do you want to die, Khai?" Nasuha suddenly appeared, leaving just him and Nasuha in that Mind Dimension."Nas-""Khai... You can't die," Nasuha said, and Khairul fell silent."Don't die, Khai." Hazim appeared as well."If you feel responsible... save us..." said Nur afterward.Everyone disappeared, leaving Khairul alone in the empty Dimension of his Mind."After you save them... only then think about whether you want to live or not!"Mei slapped Khairul's face, and his eyes snapped open. He had returned to the real world, looking around at the HOPE team, along with Rose, Shaurya, and Ehsan, all of whom looked disturbed and sorrowful."How could you think and say all that? Don't you know how much Nasuha cares for you? How much... we care about you? Huh?!" Mei shouted angrily."M...Mei..." Khairul could only look at her, his eyes welling with tears."Chyou, take Mei away to calm down," Khalid requested."Okay." Chyou took Mei away first, and Khairul raised both of his bandaged hands."I can't believe you actually weakened your body so you could die. Rose went crazy when you flatlined just now..." Kyoko reprimanded, as Khairul turned his gaze away."Khai..." Rose called softly."I called them... because I was completely lost just now," Rose continued, but Khairul didn't look at her."I know you can't say anything to us right now, Khai... But just tell us, what happened to Nasuha?" Khalid asked."My dad... He... with the other Mutants... they took Nasuha away..." Khairul replied quietly."Alright... so they didn't kill Nasuha immediately, which means they have a reason for wanting her alive." Khalid rubbed his chin thoughtfully."Nasuha... is still in danger. Please, hurry and find her..." Ehsan pleaded, and Khalid looked at him with a troubled expression."The Mutants who attacked Khairul and captured Nasuha... they definitely know a lot about us; they've been spying on us and researching us without us realizing it. Their abilities are also not fully known; the last time we rushed headlong into an enemy, we almost died." Khalid explained, and Ehsan clenched his fists and left."Khalid, let's discuss what to do in another place first... In Khairul's condition like this, we won't get anything out of him. Give him time to process everything that happened." Mikael whispered, and Khalid nodded in understanding, walking out of Khairul's room, with Mikael following shortly after."Ugh... I don't even know what to do..." Kyoko said, looking frustrated. Only Rose and Shaurya remained by Khairul's side.Once again... I survived, and the ones who are better than me are in danger.Finally, Khairul was left alone; he clenched his hands, his arms trembling.Khairul recalled the first time his Mutant power emerged, wanting the blade to retract back into his right arm."Retract... Retract!""Come out... Come out... Come out!" Khairul cried out alone in his dark hospital room, the blade in his arm refusing to emerge. He couldn't feel it like he had before, and he banged his head repeatedly before pulling the blanket over himself. Khairul started to cry."A...Arrghh!"Behind the curtain of his bed, Mikael, Khalid, and Mei heard Khairul's scream. Mikael's expression turned sorrowful, while Mei looked down, and Khalid appeared extremely worried. Chyou and Kyoko were walking down the hospital corridor carrying plastic bags filled with snacks and bread. Rose and Shaurya were discussing with other police officers they had encountered at the hospital.I thought I had changed.In the end, I'm the same...The clock showed it was already midnight when Khairul's eyes suddenly opened; Kyoko pulled back the curtain of his bed. Khairul didn't look at her, and Kyoko sat down beside him, then opened her phone."In case you forgot, Nasuha needs you." Kyoko showed him a picture she took of herself with Nasuha and Khairul, with a bright sky and clouds behind them. Nasuha was smiling sweetly in the photo."I... can't do anything..." Khairul said."If you had your blades back, do you think you could go save Nasuha?" Kyoko asked, and Khairul placed his arm over his face."No...""What do you want to do, Khai? How long do you want to stay like this?" Kyoko pressed again, this time Khairul fell silent."Listen. Your life is pretty terrible. You've been abused, you lost the people you love, and you're just a kid. Your mind is all messed up trying to process all this. Everyone understands that... but Khai, this isn't the time to feel sorry for yourself. People's lives are in danger." Kyoko moved Khairul's arm away from his face, looking directly into his eyes."You're not just a normal kid anymore; you're a Mutant. Nothing that happens will change that. You said it yourself, right? What's important is what's happening right now... Nasuha needs you now." Kyoko said, and Khairul let out a long sigh, pulling his hand back."Why... do you all need me? For what? I can't track the Mutants like you guys. I don't have any powers anymore... What don't you understand? I have nothing! I should be dead! Understand?!" Khairul shouted angrily, causing Kyoko to take a step back in shock."Damnit!" Khairul slammed the metal bar beside his bed, causing it to break off. Kyoko quickly left Khairul's room without saying anything. Once outside, she saw Mikael standing there with Khalid."Are you seriously here now? What if the CCTV captures your face?" Kyoko asked."Mei used her power to control the nearby CCTV cameras... I heard Khairul screaming; it seems everything we said didn't register with him." Mikael replied, and Kyoko crossed her arms with a frustrated expression."Mei, Chyou, and I still can't track Khairul's father... He can hide his aura, right? All this time he's been watching us without us knowing; I find it hard to believe. Mei will surely catch his aura..." Khalid said, feeling stuck."We've faced many types of Mutants and Strays... I wouldn't be surprised if he has powers beyond our understanding," Kyoko sighed."I don't blame Khairul for feeling defeated like that. What he's facing, no kid should have to deal with. His father isn't human; even before he became a Mutant... I would kill him if I could face him." Mikael said resolutely, with a fierce expression. Khalid and Kyoko looked at him, both appearing disturbed."He's not working alone either. There are other Mutants with him. Argh, more rogue Mutants ... Our reputation isn't that great, and now there's a recent case of criminal activity by a Mutant coming to light." Khalid lightly slapped his face."Let's focus on what's important. We need to find and save Nasuha." Kyoko resolved."Yes. Whatever happens... we will bring Nasuha home, whether Khairul is here or not, no matter how strong his father is." Khalid lifted his face, his expression turning angry.