Chapter 13 - Grief

The Winter Soldier is dead.No one, not even he could have survived that wreckage.Good riddance.Harlow had been subjected to the relentless chatter about the attack for over a week now. She developed a routine to help her cope.Get up.Train.Try to eat.Fail.Try to sleep.Fail.Repeat.The numbness gnawed at her, threatening to consume her entirely. Whenever Harlow was alone she replayed that day over and over in her head.She didn't understand why she felt so lost.Yes, Bucky had been there for her and she trusted him. She would even go as far as saying they were friends. They had fooled around but that was only to let off steam, right? So why did she find herself feeling like a gaping hole had been blasted through her? As if some part of her went down with the plane that day.Despite how Harlow was feeling, Sam was faring much worse.She had lost count of the number of times Sam had been called into Fury's office to report on his behavior around the base. Whenever someone opened their mouth to comment on how they hoped Bucky had died painfully, Sam retaliated with his fists. Harlow smirked every time she saw those people hit the ground while she stood to the side, grinding her teeth as she resisted joining in the fight. With how delicate things were around the base right now, Harlow thought it best to keep to herself no matter how challenging it was to hold back.________________________________________________________________________Fifteen days had passed since they lost Bucky. Harlow had moved beyond the numb, zombie-like phase of grieving and had now entered the painful stage of it.That is what led her to get into the boxing ring with Jace, the guy who had threatened her outside of her room. He hated her. He wanted to hurt her and Harlow wanted to let him. She wasn't going down without a fight though, she still wanted to feel her knuckles split as she threw her punches but she would let him get a few licks in too."My grandmother could fight better than that, and she's been dead for 30 years" She chuckled. Her laughter seemed to provoke him as he lunged towards her.Jace let out a frustrated growl when she side-stepped him, "Shut your fucking mouth before I rip that pretty smile off your face""Aw, you think I'm pretty? Too bad I can't say the same about you" she retorted. They continued to circle each other in the ring, waiting for the other to strike."You're just a Hydra slut, you're nothing" he taunted.They stared each other down, their daggers sharp and piercing."Always resorting to calling me a slut, what's the matter Jace? Can't think of anything original? Because you see a slut has many sexual partners but I wouldn't touch you if you were the last man on earth" she whispered mockingly, a smile gracing her lips.He yelled and charged at her, giving her plenty of time to assess his attack and uppercutting him square in the jaw as he staggered backward. She laughed loudly, feeling her sanity drain slowly from her.She stepped back three paces and readied herself for the next blow. She wanted him mad, angry enough to hurt her, she craved physical pain to drown out the hurt of losing Bucky.If he would hurry up and knock me the fuck out, I might even get a decent night's sleep.Jace righted himself and smirked, "You talk a big game but what would happen if my friends and I paid you a visit one night, when no one was around." Jace said inching closer to Harlow while spreading his arms out, emphasizing the fact that they were alone in the room. Her smile faulted as he neared."Who is going to save you huh? Barnes? Oh no he's dead. His corpse is rotting at the bottom of the ocean and you're here, all alone with just me" he whispered low.Harlow hadn't seen the fact that Jace had taken off his boxing gloves while he was speaking to her, he took the opportunity to reach up with his right hand and grab Harlow's hair, yanking her head backward and closing the gap between them. She swung erratically but he had managed to pin one arm with his and grab her other wrist with his free hand. Her eyes started to burn by the pinching in her scalp.She was helpless.Jace smiled down at her as he kicked out her feet and she fell to the ground hard with Jace in tow. He pinned her down and moved his hands to her throat, the muscles in his arms started to bulge as he squeezed.He leaned down to her ear, his hot breath made her body go cold, "I take it back, my friends and I would never want you. If you were the last woman on this earth, I'd kill you and I would make sure that your meat wouldn't go to waste".Harlow's vision was getting hazy and the sounds of her struggles were growing faint in her ears.Suddenly, Harlow saw a blurry figure appear from behind Jace's head and soon enough she was able to take one, long gulp of air followed by hacking as her throat was clear and her lungs were able to expand again.Sam had been looking for Harlow and upon walking into one of the training rooms he had found her, almost dead. Sam had run up to the ring and thrown himself in, he placed Jace into a chokehold and threw him off of Harlow's near unconscious body. Sam saw red, one from his blind rage that this piece of shit had nearly killed her and two from the blood that was coming out of Jace's face by the time Sam had finally knocked him out."Get him out of here now!" Sam shouted at the other soldiers who had rushed into the room after hearing the commotion. They picked up Jace's unconscious body and dragged him out.Sam walked over to Harlow and helped her up from the ground."What the hell happened?" Sam asked, a growing anger in his voice or was it worry?Harlow pushed away from him and staggered towards the ropes."Got a little carried away with training, that's all" she choked out, her throat burning."Harlow, he was killing you" Sam stated, following her down and out of the ring, making sure she didn't collapse."Yeah, so what?" she retorted, looking anywhere but Sam's eyes."Harlow" Sam warned."I'm fine, just drop it" she insisted, retreating further from him."Harlow!" Sam's voice rose, making her jump. She slowly turned to face him, seeing the concern etched on his face.Worry. Sam was worried about her."So that's how it's gonna be then, you're giving up" he pressed. his anger and worries both fighting for dominance within him."I'm not the only one Sam" she snapped back."After everything Bucky did, do you really think he would have wanted you to go looking for trouble, to let scum like Jace hurt you?" his tone softened as he took a step towards her, his hand reaching out.She recoiled, turning her back to him."Bucky doesn't want anything anymore, he's gone" she replied quietly."Well we need to keep going, we can't give up. We do this for him Harlow" Sam said, trying his best not to grind his teeth as his sorrow threatened to burst through.Harlow spun around, almost wanting to yell at him but her damaged throat wouldn't let her. "Why are you here Sam? You haven't said two words to me since we got back" she questioned. She had hoped he could see the pain through her emotions.Sam slowly blinked, hiding how Harlow's words had affected him. "We've got a lead, a small one but it's something," he explained. "A warehouse in Virginia, Hydra is supposedly transporting something there. Our job is to find out what it is."Harlow sighed, "Sounds like a big job" she said dryly, removing her gloves and placing them back into the box."It's a small warehouse, Fury has been surveillancing them morning and night for four days straight" Sam added."Ah, so that explains why he yelled at me for walking too slowly in the hall the other day, take sleep away from an already very pissed-off man and you get sunshine and rainbows" she said sarcastically.Sam almost smiled."Get ready to roll out in an hour" Sam announced, heading towards the door. He paused to see Harlow standing there slowly rubbing her throat. Sam sighed,"Make it two hours, after you've been to medical" he instructed before leaving._______________________________________________________________________Two hours later, after being cleared from medical with only some pretty bad bruising as a thank you from Jace. Harlow arrived at the parking garage.It was the second lowest level in the underground bunker, the lowest being the holding cells, which Harlow spent some lovely time in when she first arrived there. The garage held up to 30 rovers, all parked in two neat rows. After being down there a few times, Harlow decided she hated being underground. No matter how big the space was, there never seemed to be enough air down there.Sam stood next to Anthony, the man who kept track of the comings and goings of all the vehicles. As Harlow approached, Anthony scurried off to grab the keys. He was another one who didn't like the fact that an ex-Hydra member was walking around freely. At least he just did his best to avoid her, not try to kill her."I'm guessing we're waiting on Captain Douche and Lemar?" Harlow asked rolling her eyes. She hadn't run into them since the attack and she was very thankful for it.Steve Rogers would have actually done something while on that mission."Uh no, just us. Lemar is still on bedrest and Walker doesn't want to leave his side" Sam revealed, zipping up his backpack and handing Harlow hers."Road trip with just you and me, goodie" She said sarcastically, throwing her bag over her shoulder. Anthony appeared with the keys and Harlow stepped forward, snatching them right out of his hand. She ignored the way his breath hitched when she did."I'll drive!" she called out while she rushed over towards the car, her voice breaking slightly."Don't even think about it!" Sam shouted running after her.________________________________________________________________________Sam turned off the engine and slowly faced Harlow after enduring three hours of silence. Harlow huffed, then flung the door open and leaped out of the car. Sam couldn't help but chuckle at this point.When Harlow took off with the keys, thinking she had outsmarted him, Sam realized the best solution to retrieve the keys without hurting Harlow was to use Redwing. Unfortunately, the drone miscalculated and went for Harlow's foot instead. After ten minutes of hanging upside down high above the ground, she gave in and dropped the keys.She then proceeded to pout all the way to Virginia.________________________________________________________________________According to Fury, guard patrols were less frequent at night. So when the sun had finally set they made the plan to move in."What I can't understand is, why not have more security, maybe what they have in this warehouse isn't all that important" Sam said as they walked through the darkened forest. He was fidgeting with the device on his wrist, programming Redwing to go on ahead to make sure their way was clear."That could be the case or there may be another reason" Harlow warned, she had stopped to stare at Redwing as it flew off into the distance."Which is?" Sam asked, cocking an eyebrow high at her."Hydra is winning. They killed off the Winter Soldier, they've infiltrated France, Germany, and America. More countries are probably next, they're probably gathering more power and artillery to take on Russia" Harlow whispered, her worry evident."Why do you think Russia is the end goal?"Harlow took a breath and looked Sam in the eye."What country has the most nuclear weapons?"Sam faltered, looking down and realizing what she was saying."With control of the nuclear weapons in every country, they could hold the whole world hostage. Establish one fascist, totalitarian global state. It was always their goal, how can we possibly fight that?" Harlow asked, her stomach turned at the thought of Hydra succeeding."They've been defeated before, and it will happen again" Sam declared,"No, this time it's different" she stated."How?""We don't have Steve Rogers, we don't have someone that represents the freedom that we're fighting for. The rest of the Avengers?" Harlow laughed humorously, "They're too busy fixing other worlds to worry about ours. Iron Man is dead, Black Widow is dead, Bucky is .." Harlow's breath caught in her throat as she turned from Sam. "Bucky is gone, we're the only ones left, Sam"."Well if that's the case, know that I'll have your back til the end, Harlow" Sam replied as Redwing returned to him.I'm with you til the end of the line.Harlow smiled to herself before following Sam towards the warehouse.________________________________________________________________________We should split up.Those words were probably the most idiotic things to ever come out of Sam's mouth, which is funny seeing how he does come out with some good ones and to top it off Harlow replied with sounds like a good idea. She replayed those words in her head as she crept around the metal stacks of shelves inside the warehouse.Harlow heard footsteps in the distance making her duck further down into the dark behind the shelves, that was the second pair of guards to pass her in the five minutes she had been in there. She steadied her breathing, calming her beating heart that threatened to burst out alerting every guard in the building that she was there.Just as she had slipped past the next roller door she heard yet another set of footsteps approaching.Are you fucking kidding me? Sam must be prancing around his side of the building because all the guards must be over here! Harlow's mind seemed to scream. She squeezed herself between the shelves, it was a tight fit but at least she was hidden.The two guards suddenly appeared from around the corner, they stopped and continued their conversation just in earshot of Harlow, their masks made it hard for her to hear, but what she heard made her thank God that she had spent so many years in Germany and was able to understand every word."When does the cargo move out?" one said."A couple of days, testing is still being done, apparently there's still some mishaps with the subjects" the other replied, his accent was thicker, bear-like with gruffness showing he was older."Mishaps? I thought we had the final ingredient?" the shorter one replied."Do I look like a fucking scientist? Fuck this post, what did we do to be put here?" he complained, his rage boiling."Don't worry friend, we'll be home soon enough" he chuckled.She moved the cardboard box a little to the left to get a better view of the soldiers. As she did she noticed the big, black, bold writing on the box.SoldatenserumOh my God.They have super soldier serum.Harlow turned to look around her and noticed that the boxes on every shelf looked exactly like the one in front of her.They have super soldier serum and they have a shit-ton of it. Nausea swelled in Harlow's stomach as she took a step back against the wall. Hydra was making an army and not just any army. Every single soldier would be a super soldier, would be like Bucky.Harlow's thoughts started to consume her, picturing what a world like that would look like, not that she would live long enough to see it of course. She shut her eyes tightly, pushing the images from her mind and bringing herself back to reality, she was still in the warehouse hiding behind a shelf.The plan had changed dramatically. They were meant to gather intelligence. Bring down some soldiers if they could but now, Harlow needed to blow this whole warehouse to sunder.She tore off her backpack as quietly as she could and ransacked it,Of course, dynamite wasn't on the to-be-packed list but a whole fucking bottle of alcohol was, fucking Sam.She let out a sigh. That was when she gripped something heavy and metallic, a zippo lighter.Harlow looked between the lighter and the bottle and smiled.Well, I hope Sam didn't spend too much on this vodka.She picked up the bottle, twisting the top off and took a shot of it for courage. Shivers ran down her arms as she tried not to gag, she sat it down on the concrete as she tore a long piece of cloth from the bottom of her dark, grey t-shirt. Harlow peered over the shelf seeing the two guards still standing there unaware of her presence as she turned back and shoved the cloth into the opened bottle. Sweat formed on her brow, shooting one last look toward her enemies she lit the makeshift fuse and threw the bottle as hard as she could at the opposite wall.With a loud crack the bottle split open, pools of liquid now burning with fire sprung out and latched themselves onto everything they could, that was all she needed because once that fire had reached the serum, it would explode like fireworks.The two guards jumped as they turned, both of their guns were raised as they ran over to the fire. The older one dropped his weapon as he looked for a way to stop the fire but there was nothing they could do now. Serum started to burst, ripping open the boxes. The flames had already made their way onto the shelf next to the one Harlow had hit. She took the opportunity to sneak out of her hiding spot and raised her leg, she brought it down into the back of the shorter guard. He groaned from the pain, discarding his gun and landed on one knee. He turned towards the source of his pain and Harlow took ahold of his head and slammed her knee up into his face. She felt something crack. She pushed him off to the side as the other soldier dove for his gun. Harlow followed by jumping onto the man's back, bringing him to the ground and slamming his head into the concrete. She crawled over him and gripped the gun and slid it into the fire.Her body still ached from her row with Jace but she pushed the pain aside. Harlow pulled herself off of the ground quickly just as she came face to face with the soldier. Her own weapon was already in her hand and aimed at him. She took a breath. She took another.Too long.She hesitated.ShitThe masked soldier managed to capture the hand that held her gun and knock it away. She gasped as he grabbed both of her shoulders, pulled Harlow towards him then slammed her down into the concrete. Harlow's vision speckled from the force. He wasted no time before grabbing her neck and sending a hard punch into her cheek. Her head snapped to the side and she felt the metallic taste of blood bubble up in her mouth before she let out a gasp, sending a red river cascading down her chin.She needed to reach her ankle, her taser was there, the last line of defense she had or she was done for.The flames started to spread higher and made their way across the vast shelves of boxes. It was very clear that this room would be engulfed in only a matter of time.He gripped her by the throat and started to squeeze. Her vision blurred and suddenly the soldier was replaced with Jace. He was smiling that sinister smile at her.Not again.He had left her arms free, and with that she brought both of her hands together into a fist and struck him where she knew it would hurt any man. He howled and released her neck and she coughed and spattered.She was able to stumble to her feet, for just a moment, but a moment was all she needed to grab the device from her ankle and turn just in time for the soldier to charge at her.Harlow aimed for the soldier's neck, the small opening where she could make contact with his skin. Judging by the noises the man made, it must have been painful, he shook violently before dropping to his knees."You fucking traitor!" a fuming voice echoed off the walls of the warehouse. Harlow dropped the used taser and turned toward the shout. Harlow didn't recognize him but he seemed to know her. He was standing with his arms raised and a loaded gun pointing right at Harlow's head. The chaos became quiet, Harlow could feel her heartbeat thudding against her ears. She had nothing, no weapon, no backup, no hope. Sure she could try and dive out of the way but the man would surely just fire again and again until she was down.A sudden bang ricocheted off the walls that made Harlow jump, squeezing her eyes shut. She stood waiting for the pain or the darkness, whatever came first. But nothing did.She slowly opened her eyes and saw the man, once menacing and full of rage, now stood in shock before collapsing to the ground with a thud, his gun slid across the concrete, the floor slowly staining red with his blood.Harlow took a ragged breath and slowly turned to look around the room, trying to locate where the bullet came from.Out of the shadows, another Hydra soldier came into focus, his face hidden behind his mask. His gun was still trained on the now-dead man on the ground. Harlow's heart jumped back into her throat as she tumbled to the gun on the ground, leaning on one knee, she pointed the gun at the stranger who just saved her life.The soldier turned and aimed at Harlow, their standoff seemed to last for an eternity, she was unsure who this person was and what they had planned to do.But then, the soldier held up his hands, his gun falling and catching by the strap around his chest as he slowly walked forward. Harlow still knelt on the ground, her aim never leaving his approaching body.The soldier moved his hands around the back of his head, grabbed ahold of his mask and yanked it from his face.Harlow slowly rose from the ground and dropped her weapon to her side. Her mouth opened wide.I must be dead."Bucky," she choked out.She couldn't resist the urge to run towards him, to touch him, to make sure this wasn't a result of the hit to her head. It took a moment, but he soon embraced her, pulling her close against his chest."You're alive," she breathed. "H-How are you here?" she stuttered, pulling away to look at him. She beamed, he had bruises across his face but looked... well... alive."Harlow! Where the hell are you?" Sam called out through the flames as he ran around the corner. Sam came to a quick stop when he saw Bucky standing with Harlow in his arms.Sam had the same look on his face as Harlow assumed she did."Buck?" Sam stood, his mouth hanging open slightly. Bucky gave a small smile and Sam took three long strides before reaching them, his arm shot out and gripped Bucky on the shoulder."You bastard, how?" Sam almost chuckled, the happiest he had looked for over two weeks.Part of the structure of the building cracked and fell into the blazing fire behind them, Harlow jumped and shot a look of worry to both of the men. On the other side of the flames, more of Hydra's soldiers were coming towards them, their guns close to their sides."As touching of a reunion this is, we should go" Bucky said, blocking an incoming bullet with his metal arm as they fled out of the warehouse.