Chapter 15: The next big change

"I know I'm breaking your heart, but I want you to understand Prapit. His actions speak louder than words. You may see what you he shows you, but you need to understand him to see what he really wants you to see.

When Prapit met you, his life, believe it or not, changed for the better. He, who was existing as Niranj's shadow, started living as Prapit.

You were fierce, you did what you believed was right, and you fought for what you believed in. He respected you for it. But you were different in one other aspect. You refused to be tainted. You refused to blame your circumstances, you refused to give up on your dreams. You refused to stop trusting in goodness. He wanted to protect your innocence, he wanted to become your support. What he didn't notice was, you were becoming his support.

Do you remember that time when you cooked and refused to eat till he came back? You slept hungry that day. He made it a point to come over for dinner every single day after that, because he couldn't bear to see you hungry. But he started enjoying your food and company.

Do you remember the time you brought in a stray kitten? In front of you, he pretended not to notice, but he fed the kitten when you went to school, and made sure it was well loved.

You cried for a few hours when the kitten ran away, he spent days trying to search for the kitten, but it had passed away in an accident. He never told you that. He made it seem like he hated animals and refused to buy you a pet. But that wasn't true. When he saw how broken you were, when the kitten disappeared, he refused to let you near any animal. That was his way of protecting you. He wanted you to smile. He did everything he could to see you smile.

When you smiled, he smiled. When you spoke, he laughed. He could be himself only around you.

Slowly, he stopped doing anything illegal. He instead became an agent for the police. He did it to protect you. He, who had been selfish and non interfering, became someone who could be respected in society, not just feared.

You thought him the importance of dignity to humans. He started trying to understand how he could win people over through effort, not just threat. He learnt to reason with innocent people, instead of exploiting them like the old him would have done.

That was something even Niranj couldn't get him to do.

You gave him love without restraints, without conditions, and you never expected anything in return.

So he gave you the only thing he could... his own love. But he did not want to say it.

He wanted you to live your life, not feel obliged to love him back, the way he loved you. He didn't know that you loved him the same way he loved him."

Then it was on your twentieth birthday, that you kissed him, and then you confessed.

You were drunk. But he knew you loved him. He pretended not to know until you felt comfortable enough to tell him.

Akat interrupted him.

"If he loved me, then why did he kiss uncle Vin?"

Uncle Maran looked at Akat. "Because he wanted to protect you. It was the only thing he could do to protect you."

Just then they heard the purr of Prapit's car.

Uncle Maran said, "We'll continue this conversation later, but for now, go and wash your face. You look a mess."

Akat went to his room. He looked at himself in the mirror. He did look horrible. His eyes looked puffy. Prapit could read him like the back of his hand, and would instantly find out that he had cried.

He quickly washed his face and went down.

Prapit looked like he hadn't slept in days. He had a stubble and looked absolutely disheveled.

He walked robotically to where Akat was and leaned on his shoulder.

Akat was a bit taken aback, but hugged him. Prapit stayed that way for a while, then said, "I need to get a bath, I will be leaving after that."

Akat replied, "You will eat before you leave. I'll whip up something whilst you wash yourself."

Akat could feel Prapit smile into his shoulders. He didn't say anything, but walked up.

"Don't you think Prapit, who could have walked into any nearby hotel, came all the way home for a bath, strange?" Asked uncle Maran.

Akat looked at uncle. Prapit missed Akat, there was no other reason. He was starting to realise what uncle Maran meant when he said, Akat needed to look at what Prapit wanted him to see, not just what he expressed through words.

He wasted no time in cooking for Prapit. He packed some food and snacks in a bag, placed a spare set of clothes and toiletries.

Prapit, looking fresh, came out, the pleasant aroma of food greeting him.

They had lunch together, Akat keeping the conversation light.

"Prapit, will you be able to come home for the New Year?"

Prapit looked at Akat, "I don't know, but I will try to come."

Akat smiled. "Prapit, you told me I could ask you whatever I want right?"

Prapit looked at Akat wearily. His instincts were telling him Akat was going to ask him something he wasn't going to like.

"I want to spend the next two week's at Vira's place."

Prapit looked at Akat. He did not explode, surprising both uncle Maran and Akat.

"You want to sleep there?"

Akat shook his head. "No. I will be back home before six, and I wont go everyday either. I want to collect some stuff. Uncle Maran will come with me too, he'll vouch for me, so you can be assured, I won't do anything you wont like.

And Vira won't be there most of the times."

Prapit nodded. "Okay. Text me on the days you leave to his place and let me know once you reach back home."

Akat looked surprised. "I can text you?"

Prapit replied, "of course! I may not be in a position to reply immediately, but whenever I get a chance I will make it a point to respond."

Akat sat quiet for a second, then he asked, "Can I send you good morning and good night every day?"

Prapit nodded. "I would be happy if you did."

Akat smiled, it was a smile of such joy, Prapit felt moved. Such a simple thing made Akat this happy.

Akat then asked him, "You won't be sad that I am going to see Vira right?"

Prapit sighed, "If I were around, would you go?"

Akat nodded. "I need to."

Prapit asked, "Between me and Vira, whom do you like the most?"

Akat replied instantly, "you ofcourse!"

Prapit asked again, "Will that reply change?"

Akat looked at him like he was an ogre from an unknown planet. "Not till I die."

Prapit shrugged, "So I have no reason to not trust my husband. I have nothing personal against Vira. Get him over sometime for lunch, when I'm around."

Akat's eyes widened. He couldn't believe what he heard.

He walked up to Prapit's chair and bent over, gently kissing him on his cheek, causing a very surprised Prapit to blush.

"Prapit, I love you, and I fear I may love you more than I should."

Prapit smiled as he looked straight into Akat's earnest eyes. He felt shy and elated at the same time.

"I'm okay with it being more than it should. Only don't stop. That will kill me," he mumbled, his voice gruff.

Akat realised, Prapit was actually being shy. He kissed him again before grabbing the empty plates in front of him and moving them to the kitchen.

Prapit sat quietly, watching Akat wash. His heart was beating too fast. The fact Akat initiated the kiss was in itself a gift to him. He realised, at that moment when Akat smiled at him, he was willing to say okay to whatever Akat asked of him.