Chapter 2

I enrolled in the same high school as I thought you would go; that is what I think. You enrolled in the nearest Catholic school and famous high school in town. You even got the top place in the entrance exam, yet something happened and your family suddenly moved to the city. I haven't seen you since then. 

My parents asked me where I wanted to go to high school. I am a little bit excited because it feels like I am already an official teen. I chose the Catholic school nearest to the house, even though I also took an entrance exam in a public school farther than the first one and where my brothers used to study. The teachers there expected a lot from me; they thought I would be the same. I mean, my brothers were used to being the smartest students in that public school and always joined in different competitions, either poster making, debate, sports, or quiz bees; they always went home with a trophy. However, the teachers there seem to be disappointed when I didn't get the score that they were expecting, yet I was supposed to be in class A, or what they used to call special science class, the top section. But I chose the other school for the reason that I thought it would be more fun because most of our batchmates will be there, so there are not so many adjustments, that is what I thought. 

I spent two years in that old Catholic school, and I think that is the worst part of my high school life. Nothing changed; people still bully me, and I still cry in class. No one still chooses me, and even the people I thought would be my friends turned their backs on me. I like the guidance counselor there though; in her I found someone who thinks I am worth it. She comforts me, gives me medicine when I am sick, gives me a jacket when it is cold, or even a fare going home. I really like that I found a sister in her—a sister that I never will have. If I will miss one thing in that school, it is definitely her. 

Anyway, do you remember this one girl in our elementary school? She invited me to their church, where the pastor is her father. It is also near the house—a walking distance, actually. I start going there and participate in the church activities. It is fun; I like it; I really enjoy it. Then I met a guy in that church; he is going to the same school as I am. He is a year older than me, and his class is just next to mine. He is really active in church or even in school activities; he is tall, handsome, funny, talented, a loving brother, and friendly. He plays drums, and he is amazingly gorgeous when he starts the beat. I had a crush on him for almost two years. I am even friends with his two younger sisters. His biblical name really matches his attitude. 

We had a sports festival in school one time, and we were in the same group with one of my classmates. I admit that I was jealous when I saw them always together during the event. They became so close—closer than we used to be. I want to join the fun, yet it seems that there is no space for me, so I just watch them from afar. 

It is funny how I find pair clothes that he all has and memorize the day he used them so that I could also. I even go in the corridor where he walks in the hope that he will be there and we can walk together. Oh my gosh! I cannot imagine I did those crazy things for a guy. Every time I think of those times, it embarrasses me, but I like it. 

After a couple of years, my parents told me that my tuition is increasing and they cannot pay it anymore, so we decided that I would go to transfer to the public high school where I also enrolled. At first, as much as possible, I don't want to transfer. I never transferred schools before; I don't know the feeling of a transferee. I don't want to leave him, from one wall apart to floors to kilometers. Also, my friends (if I have... maybe). Especially the guidance counselor that is my comfort zone in my darkest days in that school. And the fun activities we had. 

My first year there was more than I expected. I mean, I was a shy and quiet girl all my life. Who would believe that I am awarded as the most behaved student in my kindergarten? From being an introvert, my extrovert side came out little by little. One thing I just don't like the guidance counselor; he is a big, scary person; I don't even want to meet his eyes. Nevertheless, from being the victim of bullying to being a bully, I see him almost three times in one week. In addition to that, there is also being the noisiest student or having the loudest voice. 

Who would have thought that I would find the real meaning of high school in a public place? It makes me realize what most of the people said: "High school is the most beautiful thing that can happen in a teen's life." So... This is what they mean; now I know. 

I met a new group of friends. They are simple and ordinary but fun to be with. We argue sometimes, sulking, yet at the end of the day, we learn to forgive and forget. Of course, as time passes by, I also meet other people that I can say are really friends, different from what I used to call friends in my private school. 

This was also the year that I didn't expect. I mean, it never comes to mind that we are going to meet each other again after a couple of years. 

I was going home from school that Thursday afternoon when I unexpectedly saw the same people talking to my mom. I remember this was also the same scenario I saw a few years ago, but this time, it feels more awkward. They greeted me; I just smiled shyly as a response. I heard them talk about me for a little while, like how your mother was so amazed at how grown I am already. I think it is more of a wonder if I didn't grow up. 

The next thing I knew is we are in the church again—the church where we used to go when I was a child, the church where we spent most of our childhood days together aside from school. The first thing I look for is... You. (⁠灬⁠º⁠‿⁠º⁠灬⁠)⁠♡. I want to know how mature you have become. I didn't even notice the small changes the church had become. 

I suddenly felt insecure when I saw the girl who just entered the room that used to be small, and I barely knew her existence when we were in elementary school; she's your younger sister, by the way. She had grown into a fine young woman, with perfect body-wearing and height. She's wearing a long purple floral dress that really fits her. However, the insecurities I had in my body faded when I saw what shocked me the most at that time. I saw a woman who is the same age as me; it really surprised me to see her in this place because she is one of the students that bullied and hated me when I was in elementary and in high school in the Catholic school. She used to be friends with your childhood crush. It makes me wonder how she and her family end up here. Do you even know her? 

I failed to meet you the first time I went to church again. Your mother said that you didn't go with them going back here; it was just her and your younger sister. Next Sunday after that, they went back to the city again, and we also didn't go to church. 

In the middle of my third grade there, also my first year as a transfer student. Some interns from another school came, also called practice teachers. They are amazingly nice and good-looking; however, my eyes got stuck to this one intern. He majored in science and taught us physics. He is tall, smells good, has a cute smile, likes strawberry chocolate, is good at cooking, and is a little feminine. He is five years older than me, like my oldest brother. 

Oh My Gosh! I don't know that this happy crush will turn me into a little crazy person. Every lunchtime, I ran to the balcony to see him. I asked my friend for his number, social media account, and address. After he left at the end of the school year, together with the other interns, I kept on messaging him, calling his number, even though I never received a reply. What's the craziest is that I even planned to go to his hometown, even though I don't know where it is, how far it was, or his exact address. Yet because I was just fourteen, I am not that very independent yet, so I end up not going. 

When I moved to tenth grade, I met a friend... No, a best friend. I never thought that she would be my friend; I mean, I'd been friends with her ex-best friend. They were friends since elementary school, but everything changed when this best friend of her dated her ex-boyfriend. The girl transferred to another school after. I really hate this girl; she wasn't my friend when I first transferred here. I thought of her as a bully, annoying, and snobby person. But then, one day she called me when we were just starting our tenth grade to go home together. I don't know what happened next after that; we just found ourselves always together and relying on one another. 

I remembered when I first had a sleepover at her place. It is raining heavily that time after class. We stayed in the room with our other classmates, telling stories while waiting for the rain to stop. I didn't notice that I already missed the last trip going home. So you offered your place. My mom keeps calling me that night; it is my first time to sleep over at someone's house, especially since we are not that close during that time. She told me that there would be meteorites that night, yet we didn't see anything during that time. The rain just stopped, but the sky is still filled with clouds. I was very shy, even when I just met her younger sister. Her sister thought that I was her best friend, yet she told her that I am a different person, who would know that I will be the regular person there. She even tried her best to hide me from other members of her family, especially her grandmother and her father, more especially her father. He hates having visitors, and sleeping over is not his thing. Starting from there, every time I have to go there or sleep there, I stay in her bedroom to not be seen by others. 

In the middle of the school year, she formed a small basketball team. The school opened a basketball match every afternoon after class for boys and girls. This basketball thingy will always be one of my favorite high school memories.

Every afternoon, I sat on the bleachers to watch the mini-competition that they were having. Nevertheless, the funny thing is... Instead of cheering her and her team. I am watching the boys from the other court and cheering for them. They are our classmates; we are close... Very close. I really like to watch them play, but just to make it clear, I don't have a crush on any of them. We are just really friends who tease each other and laugh together. I don't know if I will feel embarrassed or if I will just laugh at it. I told the teacher-in-charge, who is also our math teacher, to let them play every day because I like to see them in the court every afternoon. There are a lot of teams and players, so they can't play every day. I think that was already three days in a row that they didn't play; it means it was also three days in a row that I didn't see them in the court. That is when I decided to talk to the math teacher; she's there when I am begging him to let them be in court. The two of them are hiding their laughter. The next day, they are in court again. 

Every lunchtime, me and my other classmates used to pull chairs in the corridors and tease the lower-grade students passing by. This is the era where pocket books are life for teen-age girls, finding ways to read in class and in break times. I like how chill we are, just thinking about how we are going to tell the teacher to extend the project, asking them to tell stories to avoid long quizzes, telling our classmates to treat us on break time, and climbing on walls during class hours. This is the era where we are carefree and just know how to have fun with simple things. I will never forget how I climb on the fence in the lemon plantation in front of the school when the teacher is absent. I am still the smallest among us and the only one who can enter the small hole in the fence. One is catching the lemons I throw behind the fence; one is a lookout, and the other one is for standby. The whole class is there watching us tell them that they will tell it to the teacher, but one lemon or two is already enough to silence them. 

Around September or October, most of the teachers are always absent, for they are the ones in charge of those students who will go to regionals and nationals, which is nice for those who do sports like it is really their passion. So most of the time, we are doing nothing in the class, and on those times, we have our own worlds. Some are flirting with their boyfriends and girlfriends, some go play basketball, boys go to the computer shop, good students stay and finish their homework, some swim on the river, and for my group, we go to the canteen. The moment where I only use my allowance for fares, sometimes it is even free. My snacks and lunch are provided by my friends. Every time we go out, it is their treat. My classmates also pay me to draw or to write poems, stories, or essays for them; that is my sideline. I also have customers from other sections and grade levels. Sometimes, snacks are enough or a good lunch, but most of the time, cash is much better. I am sixteen at that time; it is also at that age that I start to work as a part-timer in a fast food restaurant and also at a bakery every weekend. 

I miss the science teacher there, the only teacher I am really close to. At first, I thought he was a very strict and scary teacher; that is what everyone thought. Yet, in my opinion, he is just like a friend to me. He teases me and bullies me all the time, and so do I to him, but we never get offended. Even if I am far from him, like I am on the first floor of the building and he is on the third, he will shout my name on the balcony, or if he is in the room or office and I am in the basketball court, he will still shout my name just to bully me. He often uses my name as an example in the class; I am the first person he calls when he needs help from the students. Of course, I answer him back every time he throws a joke. 

We celebrate together and jump for joy as well when they win. If they lose...wait, I think they never lose the game. It is always a win. Well... It was all thanks for me, their best cheerleader; even I am just the only one cheering for them, so half of the winning reason is me. They always thank me for cheering them on, and if there is a foul play, they ask me to fix it. And I will get angry at the other team and fight with them to the point that they have to stop me because if they don't, I will end up in the guidance counselor's office, where I don't visit anymore. 

It is my first winter break after entering the public school. The church planned to join a team-building activity with the other young people in the other church, so we went for a trip going to the city where you are. With the other young people in the church, we were carrying our luggage from the car when your presence surprised me. You became tall and...and...and more handsome. Suddenly, my feelings went back, but not everything. Maybe... maybe I just got mesmerized by him. I didn't or never expected that we would meet again, and this kind of scenario never came to mind. You smiled at me like we just met yesterday. My eyes widened to see you in braces. Your teeth, your bunny teeth, why is it gone? Why did you remove it? Although small teeth fit you, the cute bunny teeth are much better, in my opinion. You offer to help me carry the bags; I shakingly give them to you without removing my eyes off you. 

That night, all the girls slept together in one room, of course, and your room is just next to ours. Maybe like one or two in the morning, I woke up suddenly needing the bathroom, and I am still half asleep going there; my eyes are even closed the whole time I am using it. I didn't even mind turning on the lights because it might wake the others up. I came back to bed where your younger sister is and went back to sleep. 

The next morning, the noise of the adults coming from the kitchen woke me up. I stretched a little without opening my eyes. Yet in a second, I felt that I was fully awake as my eyes widen, like in their biggest size. I thought this only happened in the movies. I jolted awake as I saw who was lying beside me. I go surprised and panic at the same time; there is no time to think about what or how I ended up in this situation. I mean, I am not even drunk or something to do this kind of mistake. The first thing I did was check if you are awake or still deep in your sleep. Oh my gosh! If anyone finds this out, I will be dead, dead from shame. I tiptoe going out of your room to make sure that I will not wake you up and not be noticed by anyone. ,

I slowly turned the door knob while shaking a little, hoping that no one would see me going out of this room. I lean my head first on the door before opening it completely to check if there is someone behind the door. When I heard a complete silence, I took a deep breath before going out. However, as soon as I heard the creek of the door, I almost fell to the floor when I saw your sister standing in front of your room, like she knew that I slept there last night. Her judging eyes tell everything that I can't even meet hers. I can't find words to say, or how am I even going to explain the situation when I can't even remember how I ended up here.

She told me not to be nervous; she saw me enter a different room last night after I went to the bathroom but was too lazy to call me in, so she let me be. I don't know if I am going to blame her or my stupidity. I told her to keep it a secret from everyone, especially you. I cannot imagine how you are going to react if you knew. But now you know. 

After breakfast, I was supposed to go to the bathroom for a morning shower when both of us held the doorknob at the same time. I thought my head was going to burst that time as I felt the heat going up in my head. Everything that happened this morning flashed in my head again. I told you shyly to go first, then run going back to our room, your sister's room. I let the others shower first after you; I don't want to feel your presence even though I am in the bathroom. 

Almost nine in the morning when we start the young people team building with the other churches. We played games like tag of war, group games, and others. Then there is this one game. I don't know what when you stood beside me. That is already enough to be conscious. Then you need to hold my hand as we move around. That is the first time I felt your warmth after years; it is still the same as what I used to; it is still the you I liked before. 

We decided to go to the horror house near the park after the team building in the afternoon. You know how much I really like horror or scary stuff. We used to watch together when we were kids, and then I would hold on to you before I screamed when there were jump scares in the movie we were watching. The other young people are pushing each other who will enter the scary house first. In the end, you go first, and I am at the end of the line. The sound effect will make the chills in your body run down to your spine, as well as the hair in your body will all stand, not knowing what might come out. The girl's scream echoes the whole place as I see a masked person with bloody clothes following us at the back. I don't know if the other noticed him, but we became friends. It is just a short scary journey, but fun. I did enjoy the horror house, even though it is not really scary at all. 

Break is done, school will continue, which means we will not see each other again. We have to wait for the net vacation or break before we meet again, sad but true. 

In a few weeks, we are already going to finish junior high school. The teacher focused on building our careers or making sure what would be best for us when we graduated. One by one, have consultation with the teacher, discussing the kids plan in the future, what will be the nice choice, or what each talent or what we want to become. I don't even know how this is going to help us build a better future. I mean, I don't even know what major I will choose or what I am good at. It is impossible for the teacher to memorize every talent, uniqueness, or potential of every student to give suggestions on what they should take or what will be better for them. Not all things we decide are what we still want when we graduate. People change, and so does their plan. My whole childhood days, I wanted to be a teacher. I wanted to inspire kids and people because I believe that there are no engineers, architects, doctors, or other professions, whatever it is, if there is no teacher. When I moved to eighth grade, I decided to be a nurse. I don't know why; I don't even like hospitals. Yet all the girls in my class said that they want to become nurses, and because I don't want to be different, I said the same thing. When I transferred to a public school, I wanted to bake or be a patissier. I thought it was cool to create sweet desserts. Then, before I moved to senior high, I wanted to own a bookstore. I like creating stories; my classmates say that my works are so interesting that all of them want to read it, and one more thing is that I also like reading. This is the era of pocket books or online reading, which every high school girl holds during break time. I think bookstore really fits me; I can sell the books I create and read other kinds for free. 

After class, my friend and I decided to go for a quick snack since they don't have a game this time or the boys. There is a nearby snack house in school wherein most of the customers are students, not just high school but also colleges and even pupils. I just got a piece of cheesecake and a matcha bubble tea, and my friend ordered a burger and fries. We were busy telling stories as the place is getting noisier little by little. After a minute or two, someone sits beside me and my friend, two of the guys of the basketball team I am cheering on. In the end, the four of us occupied one of the tables there, also as the noisy group. Every time I am with them, there is nothing serious to talk about. I like how carefree we are during that time. If I just knew, I should have enjoyed every second of it. A piece of cheesecake and burger feels so good that your stomach feels full, not just with food but also with air from laughing.