Chapter 1: Only a healed heart can teach love

Whatever the wise, the man she used to believe was her sun and moon, was spewing about her to their underlings and her peers for them to isolate her like that, she didn't care. It felt strangely okay and safe.

She used to love the adoration and attention before but, after she saw what she saw, what he and the villagers did or in literal sense didn't to her only son, their previous Ruler, then she understood. Those villagers were never her family.

Jika was better off somebody else's child rather than hers. She couldn't protect him nor can she avenge him. Does that mean she doesn't care to care?.

She actually finds it quite funny how someone could believe the sick to find a cure to their problems. Muso was and still that boy who lied straight faced to the whole village on how he could speak to the higher powers and is in touch with the spiritual world only to save his life.

That should have been the point for her to let his hand go when he left her to get manhandled and raped again and again for being the 'pure's' temptation.

Maybe she should have accepted her fate and bonded with their chiefdom's doctor when she came of age, although she would have been the thirty ninth wife and he was dying as it was but, at least the only war would have been between the wives_ But, that would have been the brutal kind so yeah, wars are never avoidable in life.

It wasn't even about the male dominance that was the problem between the once head over heels in love couple. No. It was as simple as having different ideologies or on Kirri's end, She was vocal and unrelenting. And it wasn't good for a woman to question things.

They were nobody's, running from their own people where they were chased like thief dogs just for deciding to be together. Stupid right?.

"Is it about Jika?" Asked Rena when she noticed Kirri deep in thought while crafting a mat, outside their hut in the forest where it was supposed to be a place for their 'God in the flesh', Ekele.

Shaking on her head casually before stretching out her hand to accept the food from Rena's hand and gesture for her to sit beside her. They had become closer. She found a daughter from a son.

"If only life was as simple as death was made to be to the living minds. It would have been bearable, wouldn't it?" Said Kirri slowly undressing Rena's snake skin on her hands.

"What made you say that?" Asked Rena curiously for she thought that Kirri was going crazy ever since the villagers left her son's body to be eaten by animals in her sight.

"A person can make grave mistakes in private, maybe one time or more than often a day maybe but still, gets to live in agony for eternity but, you only die once. I'm jealous" Explained Kirri envious of the fact but, truth be told Rena didn't understand a thing so, she didn't comment on it further.

"They are asleep once again. You look more like their mother than me" Said Rena when she saw her babies all warm and cozy in their grandmother's grass of a bed.

"I know they are my son's but, they resemble you" Said Kirri with a warm smile something that terrifies and impresses Rena everytime. Kirri was strong.

"Why?" Asked Rena confused at the sudden comment .

"They are very stubborn!" Said Kirri with so much annoyance that made Rena laugh unexpectedly.

"Wait... How am I stubborn?" Asked Rena trying and failing to hold back on the laughter.

"I told you we don't need meat when we have enough food and fruits here but, you went ahead to a hunt. Why?" Asked Kirri with concern evident.

"How did you_?" Trailed off Rena, stunned beyond repair. Did she mess this happy bubble up? Why can't she ever follow the rules?.

"I was a mother once and my husband is as good as dead to me so, the blood was a norm" Said Kirri eyeing Rena's exposed thighs with trails of blood, "It's never good to hold your pain inside. Let your body tell you how to act. It knows more good for you than yourself"

"Mother, I'm sorry" Cried Rena falling to Kirri's shoulders accepting the woman's warmth and affection, "No, You shouldn't apologise for that and trust me, it's not something commendable. You are hurting. Remember when I said, A wounded mother can never nurture a child's health?"

"I remember"

"You are wounded now. In pain, tired and full of hate... don't let it blind you to see them as they are"

"I won't!" Said Rena with all her might.

"The future is never that fast for you to assure yourself on that. Let me nurture you, that's what Jika would have loved to see me do" Said Kirri hugging Rena tightly, "Be there for them as their mother, because that's what you are now. You'll burn yourself out to try and be everything and you wouldn't like what you see when it's all said and done"

"Jika... He died because of me!" Shouted Rena out of nowhere making Kirri flinch, "If I didn't give birth to them..."

"You would have died and as much as I love my son, he loved you the most and your death would have been his end and his end is his son's worst life by law" Said Kirri with so much conviction that made Rena doubt her.

"You didn't cry when he died! Did you want him to die? Doesn't this break your heart? Doesn't it make you angry?" Questioned Rena before standing up to put on a distance between them.

"You blamed on his weakness, you blamed on yourself, you're doubting me, it's only a matter of time before those angels face the same thing. Don't let your anger and hate live as long as you. Don't let them see that part of you. You should never be their enemy but, their mother" Said Kirri before continuing with her craft.

"How are you so calm with everything?" Asked Rena frustrated.

"Because, I was there and I know my boy. You know him too. He wanted that, he just didn't dare to do it himself. If he wanted to live then he would be here with you and not me" Said Kirri simply before Rena screamed and fell to the ground in unbearable pain waking up the babies in the process but, only with one of them crying and the other going back to sleep soundly.

Kirri had once a doubt but, now it was more than that. Their Hida was deaf. A useless needy person being abnormal is more of a death wish than anything to them. Should she do anything about it? And what?