Chapter 509: A Few Old Perverts

After returning from his trip at sea, Martin received a call from Leonardo.

"Martin, what's up with this Infernal affairs movie? Scorsese reached out to me and said you recommended me?"

"That's right. Director Scorsese wants to make this film, but I have the script. So, I secured a lead role for myself—and I got one for you too."

"A good movie?"

"Absolutely. Once you do a few more films like this and build up your credentials, I promise I'll help you land an Oscar."

"Oh, really?"

"Of course!"

"Thanks a lot, my brother!"

"No need to thank me, my bro-ther!"

"Hey, you fu—"

"Oscar!"

"Alright, whatever you say!"

…

Gordon drove Martin to a lavish mansion in Malibu.

This was Nicolas Cage's home—well, one of them, at least.

Nicolas Cage was infamous in Hollywood for his obsession with buying houses—mansions, tiny houses, weird houses—it didn't matter where they were or how they looked. If he liked it, he would throw down a fortune to make it his.

Just next year, he would spend $3.45 million on a haunted house, rumored to be the site where serial killer Delphine LaLaurie tortured and killed her slaves.

Later, he would also buy a pyramid-shaped tomb in New Orleans, declaring that he wished to be buried there.

Ironically, financial troubles would eventually force him to give up the tomb's usage rights in 2009. Guess he'd have to find a new place to rest in peace.

But buying houses wasn't his only eccentric hobby—Nicolas Cage also loved collecting all sorts of bizarre and rare objects.

As soon as Martin stepped through the door, Leonardo was already complaining, "That bastard stole my dinosaur skull!"

"What?" Martin was baffled.

"Last month, we attended a secret auction—you know, one of those exclusive, invite-only ones. I had my eye on a dinosaur skull fossil, and then Nicolas spotted it too. Damn it, he outbid me with $300,000 and snatched it away!"

"Wait, why the hell are you guys buying dinosaur bones?"

Martin was even more confused now.

"For collection, obviously!" Leonardo seemed equally puzzled by Martin's confusion.

"Collecting dinosaur skulls?"

Now Martin understood why Hollywood was a magnet for all sorts of scammers and schemers. Sure, this place was filled with crafty people, but there were also plenty of rich idiots who had more money than sense.

Auction houses and con artists loved Hollywood celebrities—they made money fast and spent it even faster, without a second thought.

Leonardo himself had invested in a bunch of "promising" paintings from unknown artists. By 2023, not a single one had appreciated in value. (Yes, this really happened.)

"Haha, Leo, long time no see! That dinosaur skull is amazing, by the way. My prehistoric bear skull got smashed by accident, so the dinosaur skull fits perfectly in its place." Nicolas Cage strolled over, casually swirling a glass of wine.

Yep, this guy had once spent $280,000 on a prehistoric bear skull—only to break it himself while playing pool. Nearly 300 grand down the drain.

Leonardo shot him a glare, then pointed around at the scattered guests chatting in small groups. He deliberately complained, "Dude, this is your party? No girls at all? Boring as hell!"

Just then, the mansion's massive iron gates swung open. Two stretch limos rolled in from outside.

Nicolas Cage's eyes lit up as he pointed at the limos, grinning. "The girls are here!"

As he spoke, the limos came to a stop, and the doors opened. A swarm of beautiful women poured out, immediately causing a stir among the guests.

Nicolas Cage reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a microphone—God knows why he kept one in there—then dramatically announced, "Gentlemen, we've got booze, women, and party favors! No paparazzi, no cops—let's get wild!"

"Yeah!!!"

A few guys cheered enthusiastically.

Martin took a closer look—turns out, the ones hyping it up were Nicolas Cage's usual crew: Johnny Depp, Keanu Reeves, and the like.

Martin's gaze lingered on Johnny Depp for a moment.

This guy was currently dating Vanessa Paradis, and they had a daughter—Lily-Rose Depp—and a son, John Christopher Depp III.

Later, though, Depp would end up separating from Vanessa Paradis because... she was abusing him.

Yes, you read that right. The one getting abused wasn't Vanessa—it was Johnny Depp.

After that, he got involved with the stunning Amber Heard, and they even tied the knot.

But—

Martin chuckled to himself. Amber Heard is definitely gorgeous—on par with Nicole Kidman and Charlize Theron—but she also has a habit of pooping in bed. No matter how pretty she is, that's a deal-breaker.

Just picturing that scene made Martin feel nauseous.

No matter how drop-dead gorgeous she looked in Aquaman, the thought of her bedroom habits instantly killed the appeal.

"Hey, Martin, why are you looking at Depp like that?"

Nicolas Cage waved a hand in front of Martin's face, noticing his weird expression. He shivered involuntarily.

Should he warn Depp to stay away from this guy?

Then he remembered that Martin and Leonardo had just finished filming Brokeback Mountain, and suddenly, a suspicious look crossed his face as he sized up the two of them.

"Hey, what's with that look?!"

Before Martin could say anything, Leonardo was already annoyed.

That expression was way too damn creepy—just looking at it made him want to punch someone!

"Ah, nothing, nothing. Martin, do you want to meet Depp?"

Martin shook his head. "Not really. I was just thinking about his movie Once Upon a Time in Mexico and how it reminded me of Salma Hayek..."

"Oh, now that's a woman!" Nicolas Cage's face immediately turned lecherous, clearly relieved.

Leonardo, standing next to him, had the exact same expression.

Disgusting old pervs!!!

(PS: Salma Hayek is definitely one of those timeless beauties. She was nearly 40 when she starred in Once Upon a Time in Mexico, yet she still had an absolutely stunning figure and an enchanting smile. Highly recommend Desperado (1995), an action thriller that was her first lead role—and also her first R-rated film. Another great one is From Dusk Till Dawn (1996), her second R-rated film. But the movie where she made the biggest sacrifice was Frida.)

Martin shot them both a look of disdain and took a step back.

In his eyes, he wasn't some pervy old man—he was a true art collector!