"Alright," she muttered to herself, "let's assess the damage. Bruised ribs? Check. Health bar in the red zone? Check. Complete and utter exhaustion? Double check. Yeah, doing great."
[Suggestion: Consider using your newly acquired skills and items to increase survivability.]
"Oh, really? Wow, I never would have thought of that on my own," she shot back, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Thank you, oh mighty System, for your infinite wisdom. Truly, I'd be lost without you."
[You're welcome.]