Not My First Pick

*Ana*

My heart still swells at the thought that this might be Father and Nicoli by the time we round another corner of the hall. It's hard to keep my composure. My lips twitch into a smile as my feet fumble between running, skipping, and walking.

Nugen bends down to whisper, surprise flickering through his usually flat expression.

"I've never seen you this excited before, Your Empress." He comments and I bite down my lip. 

As I take a deep breath, I try to calm my nerves. However, the excitement bubbles up in my voice, making it impossible to hide.

"I am." I barely can keep my voice in check just before the servants start to pass us. 

Servants bustle about with the luggage, moving swiftly and with a hint of urgency. It's quite an interesting scene.

I've never seen them work so quickly before. My eyes catch the luggage–expensive pieces of leather and gold. Something only the richest and nobles would use.

My heart lifts with hope at that. 

It still could be them. My hand grips Nugen's arm tighter as we walk. The sounds of the lobby echoing louder through the white hall. But it's not a voice I recognize yet. It's not Father's deep timberous tone, or Nicoli's mischievous ring. 

Just servants chattering so far..

Nugen leans in to whisper again.

"Whoever they are, they must be one of the wealthier nobles." He tipped his head towards the luggage still passing. " They could make a great ally. Certainly, it will be a good aid in court for you, Your Empress. More people will follow their lead if they support you." Nugen tones.

"Yes, I'm aware," I say, though my mind is already elsewhere. Not on strategy, but on the faces I hope to see.

As we round the final corner, the grand ceiling of the lobby greets us with its impressive height. I take a moment to glance over the gathering ahead—noble Lords and Ladies from the court, accompanied by their dedicated servants. All around me is a vibrant sea of red hair– all vampires

Nothing else. My heart flutters a little.

But maybe they just aren't in yet? I try to cheer back up. They could still be outside, getting out the carriage or something. 

I swallow and lift my head, noticing the shift beneath me–from smooth marble to rippling mosaic titles. Lifting my gaze over my shoulder, I see Mykhol and my aunt still making their way a few steps behind.

I turn back to look over the crowd again, searching for any hair not red. Any eye that isn't.

I scan the entrance, searching–no, hoping–for a flash of sapphire blue as the silver and glass doors open.

I stand tall, trying my best, but I still can't see over the bustling crowd in front of me. The arrivals are just out of reach. A flutter of nervousness brushes my chest, and I feel my breath hitch in my throat.

Is it them? Is it Father and Nicoli? 

I am on my tippy toes now, but I still don't see them. 

I turn to him. "Admiral, who is it?" But he either doesn't hear me. That or he is completely distracted. His brown eyes widen as he opens his mouth. 

When he does speak, it's almost mumbling. "She's coming this way."

She? I blink up at him. She who?

"Admiral-" Who is but the words never leave my mouth as the thunderous clacking of heavy feet suddenly shift the ground we stand on. Making everyone wobble where they stand.

Suddenly, my world turns yellow. Warmth engulfs my shoulders and chest, and then–I'm airborne. My feet dangle above the ground.

"What is-" I barely utter before the flood of yellow suddenly breaks. They are putting me back down. And then two monstrously large green eyes peer down at me.

Wait, green? Something clicks in the back of my mind. Her smell is filling my senses to confirm it–lemon and sage. 

I know her.

I blink to find her already grinning with all her blunt white teeth.

"Hidi?" I manage before she strikes again. Great big hands cup my cheeks, yanking me to her.

 Hidi's voice booms before she rains kisses all over. "Hello!" She kisses my head, my hands, and then each cheek. "It's been so long!" 

"When did you-" I freeze in place. I'm barely dodging her when she moves to try to plant a kiss directly on my lips.

"Hidi, enough!" I barely push her back in time to stop her. 

She pouts with a gentle whine but leans in to kiss my cheek once more before stepping back. Her heels enhance her already towering figure. She surveys me before breaking into another grin.

"Did you miss me, little Ana?" Hidi starts, her eyes widening a little after noticing. " You've-" A surprise dances over her face as she looks at me again with more thought. Her eyes fall and stay on my chest.

"You've grown." Hidi motions an hourglass before winking."Very womanly,"

"Hidi-" I flush, moving my hands to cover my chest. 

How does one respond to that kind of comment? What does that even mean?

Fortunately, I no longer stand alone, as Mykhol shifts next to me. He is already bending to bow as if it comes naturally, his sanguine smile evident from practice.

"Your Majesty Hildenberg." Mykhol offers in greeting. His back is perfectly straight when he stands, as if trying to get the most height he can to compete with her. It almost works. But Hidi is still some inches taller. 

Mykhol shifts my arm into his, linking us together as he speaks. "It's so wonderful to see you again."

"Lord Mykhol." Hidi returns with a light nod, but her reaction is less than I expected? I'm so used to seeing every girl fall for his smile, gushing or blushing.

But Hidi is instead…

Does the smile not work on her? That is a surprise. I started to think I was the only one who didn't change. But it seems Hidi is just as immune. 

Her peridot eyes regard him a beat longer before lifting to the last to arrive—my aunt.

"Your majesty?"Aunt Funda, sounds breathless as she flutters to a bow, but not before darting eyes to the both of us. Her gaze almost cut me before confusion at her son.

"I didn't realize you were invited." She stumbles to straighten up, her thin lips pressed into a tight smile with the slightest hint of fangs peeking out. "If I had known you were, I would have found my husband to greet you." 

Funda then paused to look back down the hall, as if conjuring him up.

Of course, he wouldn't be. I can't help but frown after her.

Uncle Charles hates meeting new people. It's well known. So seeing her act like he will just appear is rather silly as if he'd suddenly become a social butterfly.

But that doesn't stop the soft curse from dropping from her mouth. "Of all the times for him to be a hermit."

Hidi just waved her hand with a disinterested huff.

"Greet me now. Greet me later," She shrugged, pushing her puffed sleeves up. "It's all the same to me." But her green eyes were quickly back to me.

A spark of eagerness ran through them as she reached back to yank my arm. She nearly made me stumble as she pulled me from Mykhol to press against her hoop skirt in an instant. His eyes widened in equal horror, just like mine did.

But Hidi is already turning on her heel, my hand firmly in hers as she weaves her fingers to lock mine in.

"Anyway, it's been too long." She goes, pulling me to a walk. "Let's talk. I'm sure you have gossip for me." 

Gossip? I stiffen at the idea.

"No, really I-" I have no idea what she is talking about, but she is talking over me. Her green eyes looked over the lobby for a quick second, as if assessing her options. 

"Where can we go, so we can have girl talk."

"Girl talk?" I turn to see Admiral Nugen. His face firms as his brown eyes regard Hidi wearily. He intends to follow.

I wave my hand.

"No, it's fine. You can stay," but Hidi is now looking him over with a smile.

She slowly rakes her eyes over him before stopping at his scarred eye. "You again. Admiral Nugen, was it?"

Her voice shifts—low, eerie. 'Mama told me all about you.'

Nugen freezes. The color in his face doesn't change, but something in his posture does—stiff, guarded. His brown eyes meet hers, carefully unreadable.

"About what?" I ask, looking between them, not understanding the little exchange. 

But whatever it is, Hidi only grins, pulling me closer.

"Anyway," she smirked as if laughing at some joke. And then she is turning again, yanking me forward and power-walking in a random direction.

"Let's go. Daylight's burning." She has no idea where she's going.

"Hidi—wait!" but my voice seems unheard as she is clearly on her mission.

-x-

After navigating numerous dead ends and pointless hallways, all at Hidi's insistence that we 'see' the palace, I finally manage to move toward familiar territory. We are outside in the rose garden, the only place we can be alone.

Well, we should be. But that is not the case as my eyes scan the groups gathered once again. The garden suddenly comes alive with people. 

No, men. I note. Seeing a familiar figure walking among them, dressed in the wealthiest furs.

Duke Zaver raises a hand to me, but he seems to know better and maintains his distance. His eyes briefly glance at my companion before he immediately bows and retreats. The rest of the group follows suit. They are watching but keep a reasonable distance, appearing to be busy examining what remains of the bushes and dried vines. Not that there is much to see now.

The final blooms have faded, replaced by the familiar scents of salt, earth, and a hint of dried leaves. The day is cold and overcast, making it less than ideal for a walk outdoors. 

I tighten my shawl around my neck to keep warm.

"I'm sorry, Hidi." I start turning to her. " I thought we could be alone, here. I could take you back inside if you like," but Hidi shakes her head, whipping her golden braid with the motion.

Her peridot eyes gleam with delight. She surveys the groups of men, a strange and sharp smile curling her lips.

"Oh, why do that?" Hidi giggles, pulling me closer. Immediately feeling her warmth cover me. Giants are always so much warmer naturally.

She doesn't need blood to keep warm like I do. I look over. Finding myself a little envious. 

It must be nice.

Hidi lifts her hand to wave at the group. 

She sings, "Hello." Her wave instantly causes the last of them, the braver ones, to turn tail and retreat.

"Oh, they ran away." Hidi poohs. 

Her pout deepens as she leads us down another path, her feet crunching through the grass. Her heels sink into the soil, kicking up clumps of dirt as I follow behind. 

"Everyone seems so timid," she remarks with a sigh, as if disappointed.

My eyes look back to the garden. Most everyone has left, and we are definitely alone now.

 "I'm sorry-"

Hidi just pats my hand.

"No, I like it." Hidi giggles. "I like to see people who are afraid of me."

"Hidi," I blink up at her. "That's terrible." 

Who would want anyone to be afraid of them? I couldn't think of a worse option.

I would want people to like me. Want them to respect me. But that has to be earned. 

It's why I have to keep working hard. 

To get more supporters. And I need to prove to them that I am worthy of it.

Hidi scuffs next to me.

"No," She tuts. "What's terrible is that you haven't written to me."

She moves to bop my nose. "You completely forgot, didn't you?"

"I—oh. I didn't—" I blink with a start. My mind going blank. 

Did I say I would write? I don't recall, but she seems to be under the impression that I did. Maybe I forgot? "I didn't realize I needed to–" 

"Aren't we friends?" Hidi jerks me closer, almost causing me to lose my step and needing to cling to her arm, to gather my feet. 

"I…yes. We are." I manage. 

Hidi huffs and sticks up her chin. "You are a terrible friend, then."

"I'm sorry."Again, I can only apologize. "I promise I will do better." And I will—when I have the time to write, which is not often. I can barely write to Nicoli. 

"I have been busy, but I will not forget you again. I'm sorry to have hurt you-"

"Ha, I'm just teasing!"She squeezes my arm in hers. Her hand is so big that it completely swallows mine."I know you have a lot on your hands. It ain't easy being a ruler, right?" She winks at me.

I can't help but smile, feeling our common ground."No, It isn't."

"So, it's fine." Hidi turns us to a bench. We are deep into the garden now; not all the flowers have fallen off. They have dried out on the vine. 

"Anywho, so what's the deal?" Hidi pulls up a dried out leaf. It crumbled quickly in her hand. She huffs, as if disappointed that it was so easy to destroy. But her eyes flicker back to me.

"What's been happening? Give me the deets!"

"Beats?" 

"Ha! I meant details, you goof." She pinches my cheek, delivering a sharp sting that leaves it red and throbbing before she returns. I try to rub it as Hidi gazes into the distance. "I didn't expect it to be this bad, though."

"What is it?" I look over but can't see what she's referring to; the bushes are too high. Whatever it is, it sets her face into a strange expression, her green eyes dulling for a moment as if with concern.

And then she is back to me.

"You should visit Almony."

Almony? I blink at the sudden change of topic. 

"Hidi, I couldn't possibly- not until everything resolves with Pave and the Bulgeons."

"Oh, that little thing." Hidi huffs."You haven't solved it?" She waves her hand.

Solved it? Oh, if only. I sink a little.

"No, it's- it's complicated."

"How complicated? They invade, our land, kill them." 

A cold prickle runs down my spine. I gape at her, searching for any sign of jest–but there is none.

 "Hidi, it is not that simple. They are not just invaders. They are victims of famine. They had to leave Dueick in order to survive. I cannot fault them for that. Killing them is not an option."

Hidi's expression remains unchanged, her voice sounding bored and disinterested. "You're only creating more trouble for yourself if you think that way, Ana. They're invading your lands. They're pests."

"They are people trying to survive, Hidi. They need help. Not war."

Hidi just shrugs, unimpressed. "If that's how you want to rule, that's your choice. But in my opinion, I think it's a waste of effort."

"Well, I don't." I insist, tightening my shoulders. "It's not like they purposely invaded."There is so much more to it than that. 

Things aren't so black and white. 

 But Hidi just shrugs, again, waving her hand as if to bat it away.

"It's your empire, not mine. Do as you see fit." She fingers the opal broach on her neck.

"I am." I stiffen my gait as we cross another turn of the bushes. "Or, at least I'm trying to."

"Trying to?" Hidi lifts a brow and I sigh.

I smile sadly watching my feet cross the grass.

"It's…not been easy," I admit at last. "I have not been–" I stop, biting my lip and swallowing.

"Ana?" Hidi glances over me momentarily, as if waiting for me to admit it.

I sigh and twist my shawl.

My voice is quiet. "I've not accomplished much with the nobles. They only want to discuss the coronation or ignore me when I mention the colonies." I hesitate, then sigh.

"I don't have much support in court. It's making it hard to get through things."

For a brief moment, we both remain silent. Hidi regards me with a surprisingly stoic expression, which lasts just long enough for me to question whether she heard me. However, she then lifts her heel, and we begin to move again.

She squeezes my hand.

"Then, How can I help?" 

I freeze. My breath catches, my mind scrambling to process her words. Did she—did she just offer support?

I stare at her, searching her face, waiting for the jest. Waiting for the condition. But there is nothing but easy certainty in her voice, as if this is the simplest thing in the world.

It has been nothing but a fight to gain footing in court, every ounce of support feeling like a battle hard-won—if won at all. And here she is, offering it freely?

"You—" My voice falters. "You mean you will help me?"

She shrugs before smirking.

"Ja. Of course." She lifts a brow at me like I just said the most obvious thing. "Why wouldn't I?"

I open my mouth, but a lump forms in my throat. I could think of a million reasons.

Because you don't have to. Because Almony has remained neutral. Because everyone else makes it so difficult.

Instead, I whisper, "Thank you."

"But I have conditions." Hidi stops to reach down and push loose hair behind my ear. Her green eyes look over me before growing soft. "Promise you to come visit me in Almony."

"I... yes. I will, then, when everything is done and finished." And I mean it. 

"Good. I want you to see what a proper kingdom is." Hidi smirks, poking my cheek. "How things should be run, with servants waiting and everyone respecting you."

How should things be? I blink at her, puzzled. "What do you mean by that?"

"You'll know when you see it," Hidi says with a mysterious smile before glancing into the distance once more. Her smile fades as if she sees something. "I know you're new to running things, but this is..." Her voice trails off as her eyes darken, filled with disapproval.

"Hidi?" I stand on my tiptoes to see what's bothering her, but I'm still too short. Hidi is already gazing over the maze of bushes again, a soft smile forming on her lips.

"It's good to see the roses are still growing here." She notes moving to touch another branch. Her lips press together a moment before she smiles to herself.

"Mama would be happy to know they still thrive."

"Your mother?" I lift at the strange comment. "She knows about the roses.

Hidi nods.

"My mother gave your mother the seeds to grow them,"

"Really?" I blink up at the statement, just hearing this for the first time. "I didn't know that. Your mother knew my mother close enough to give such a thing?"

"Ja." She moved to twist a leaf off the bush. Breaking it into pieces, "back when they were friends."

Friends?

"My mother was friends with yours?" Again, I reel at the revelations. 

"They all were." Hidi wipes the petals off with her dress." Mama, your mother, Queen Belinda."

"Stepmother?" Stepmother was friends with–my mother?

 Hidi nods as if this is all old news, "Indeed, they used to be very close."

"I…find that hard to believe."

"It's true," Hidi continues. "Mama talks about it nonstop. It's annoying."

"Really?" I look over Hidi with new eyes. Her mother talks about my mother. 

I know I shouldn't. It is taboo to ask but the questions are already in my head.

What kind of woman was she? Good? Kind? Did she love me? There are so many things I want to know, and the chance to finally hear the answers sits right in front of me.

I swallow, trying to conceal my eagerness. My hands tremble as I look down at them, a mix of excitement and hesitation swirling within me.

"Your mother, do you think she would—" I hesitate, my fingers curling into the fabric of my shawl. "If I asked about my mother, would she tell me?" The question burns in my chest.

Hidi softens, but something crosses her face as if she's holding back. For a moment, it darkens her green eyes. 

"Ja," she says, her voice quieter than before. 

"She could tell you a lot." 

With that, she looks back to gaze over the garden, her eyes strangely distant as if she's lost in thought. 

"I wonder what Mama would think if she saw this." She continues with a distant smile. "That her roses still grow here even after all these years."