Ch 9 - Remove my panties
The Phantom Kiss Café was officially declared a danger zone by Machio's sanity meter.
It was supposed to be a cute little workplace.
Now?
It was a pervert's haunted house.
"Nnn~! Machio-kun, be a good boy and let me spank you~!"
Matsumi purred, swinging a giant heart-shaped cushion at his ass like a deranged love fairy.
"Nyahaha~! Wear the bunny ears too! It'll increase sales by 300%!" Tachibana cheered, bouncing around with a pair of suspiciously pink, frilly bunny ears.
Machio dodged the cushion like a ninja, already panting.
"Manager Misaki, HELP!" he cried.
Misaki Kurobane — no longer the wholesome café mom but now a full-blown sadistic queen — merely leaned against the counter, sipping blood tea elegantly.
Her crimson-tinted eyes glittered with demonic joy.
"Poor thing," Misaki cooed. "You're making such cute noises, Machio-kun. Let's hear a little more."
She licked her lips.
Machio was on the verge of either fainting or spontaneously combusting.
"THIS IS WORKPLACE HARASSMENT!" he cried.
"Nonsense," Misaki smiled sweetly. "This is... employee bonding."
Snap!
She cracked a velvet riding crop she summoned from god knows where.
Machio screamed internally.
Again.
Ten minutes later...
Machio sat tied to a velvet chair, wearing bunny ears, a frilly butler outfit, and flushed from head to toe.
Tachibana danced in front of him, holding a whipped cream can.
Matsumi giggled, kneeling beside him, brushing his thighs with a feather duster.
This was NOT in the job description.
Just when he thought it couldn't get worse—
the System dinged.
[New Quest Unlocked!]
"Remove My Panty Quest: Survive without losing your dignity (or your pants)!"
Reward: 10 Willpower
Penalty: Become Café Mascot "Panty Bunny."
Machio's soul collapsed into itself like a dying star.
"No... NO...!" he whimpered.
Meanwhile, Misaki smirked darkly from the shadows.
"Play nicely, girls," she purred.
"But leave him mostly alive."
Suddenly...
A crack of thunder ripped through the ceiling.
Machio blinked up.
A swirling black vortex opened midair.
From within it, a man stepped out—
Tall, silver-haired, dressed like a gothic aristocrat, carrying a cane tipped with a bleeding rose.
Machiel L. Lord.
Master of the Crimson Pact.
Overlord of the Vampiric Houses.
Professional Drama King.
The room froze.
Even Matsumi dropped her feather duster.
Machiel snapped his fingers.
FWIP.
Machio's bunny ears vanished.
So did the rope binding him.
Machio gasped in relief, falling to his knees dramatically.
"THANK YOU, KIND DARK LORD!"
Machiel smiled slyly.
"My, my... such gratitude. Rise, young Machio."
Machio stood shakily, adjusting his crumpled butler uniform.
"I—I need help," Machio stammered.
Machiel tilted his head, amused.
"I'm cursed," Machio said, voice cracking. "The Crimson Pact! Tachibana bit me! I can't live like this anymore! HOW DO I BREAK THE CURSE?"
The café went silent.
Matsumi and Tachibana exchanged guilty looks.
Misaki just licked her lips again, watching the drama unfold like a soap opera.
Machiel tapped his chin.
"Hmm... to break the Crimson Pact..." he mused.
Machio leaned forward desperately.
Machiel smiled cruelly.
"First, find out..." he said, pausing dramatically, "who Natsume Tachibana truly is."
Machio's brain blue-screened.
"I... what?"
Machiel laughed richly.
"You think she's just some random vampire schoolgirl? No, boy. She is a Keyholder. The original bloodline."
Machio paled.
Tachibana just stuck her tongue out cutely, twirling her skirt.
"Nyoho~!"
Machiel's red eyes flashed.
"You are tangled in far deeper threads than you know, mortal. Until you uncover her secret... the Crimson Pact shall remain. Grow stronger... or perish."
With another dramatic swirl of his black cloak, Machiel stepped back into the vortex.
Gone.
Leaving behind only stunned silence.
And a still-tied-up Machio with an existential crisis.
"...I'm so screwed," he whispered.
Matsumi handed him a pudding cup sympathetically.
Meanwhile... That Same Night...
Atop a gothic spire overlooking the city...
Kira lounged shirtless on velvet sheets, sipping from a glass of blood-wine.
Beside him lay a stunning woman—long blonde hair, curves that could kill, completely naked under a black silk sheet.
She panted softly, flushed and glowing from their "activity."
Kira should have been satisfied.
He should have felt that usual smug, post-conquest glow.
Instead...
Every time he kissed her—
Every time he touched her—
He saw Azumi.
That soft smile.
Those tired, kind eyes.
That gentle way she carried her burdens without complaint.
Kira rolled away from the blonde woman, scowling.
The woman, confused, leaned over and kissed his neck again, trailing her fingers down his abs.
"Stay a little longer, pretty boy," she purred.
Kira's stomach twisted.
It felt wrong.
It wasn't her he wanted.
It was her scent.
Her warmth.
Her goddamn annoying, adorable, clumsy presence.
He sat up, running a hand through his silver hair, irritated.
"I'm leaving," he muttered.
The blonde pouted.
"Boo, you're no fun."
Kira didn't answer.
He threw on his leather pants, grabbed his jacket, and jumped off the balcony casually, landing like a cat three stories below.
As he stalked through the rainy streets back to his castle, he muttered darkly:
"Stupid human..."
His heart clenched painfully.
"Stupid feelings..."
He kicked a trashcan over.
"I'm not supposed to fall in love with a human."
And yet... he knew.
He was already hopelessly, idiotically, catastrophically falling.
Falling for Azumi Araki.
The clueless, beautiful, struggling single mom who barely noticed the supernatural chaos exploding around her.
Kira punched a lamppost out of frustration.
He didn't even notice the blood dripping from his knuckles.
Only Azumi's smiling face burned behind his eyes.
NEXT TIME:
Machio investigates Natsume Tachibana's true origin...
Misaki's Crimson Sadism Awakens further...
Azumi and Kira's fates collide...
More quests! More accidental ecchi disasters!
(Warning: Contains Shirtless Vampire Angst, Butler Bunny Cosplay, and Manager Misaki's "Extreme Employee Training Program.")