I Don’t Want to Be a Heroic Spirit [255] [100 PS]

Some battles are planned, others are unexpected—but a true Champion embraces them all. Consider this bonus chapter one of those surprises.

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After Nero declared, "Only beautiful boys and girls can join my team," no one else came forward to request teaming up with her or Alice.

Perhaps what put people off even more than her unusual criteria was Nero's unabashedly self-assured demeanor. Faint murmurs could be heard throughout the guild:

"Why are all the promising Adventurers these days so weird?"

"There was that guy a few days ago claiming to be a goddess and a follower of the Axis Cult."

"Don't forget the Crimson Demon who can only cast Explosion Magic."

"They're all talented and good-looking, but their personalities…"

Nero paid no attention to the gossip and continued scanning the quest board. Her eyes quickly landed on something interesting.

"Recruiting teammates. Looking for someone gentle, someone willing to listen to boring stories, someone who won't make fun of weird names, and someone willing to keep me company even on days without quests. Preferred: a vanguard role, ideally someone around my age. Posted by a 13-year-old Archmage… Why does this sound so depressing?"

Nero furrowed her brow deeply as she read.

"Sister, what are you looking at?" Alice asked, tilting her head curiously.

"It's a recruitment notice… though it feels more like a personal ad," Nero replied.

"Personal ad?" Alice's confusion deepened, her golden hair cascading down with the tilt of her head.

To Nero, the notice's tone was less about forming a team and more like seeking a life partner.

"Well, Alice, didn't you mention wanting to find companions you could entrust your life to as part of your Adventurer journey?"

"Huh? W-Well, yes, that's true… Why do you ask?"

"Oh, it's nothing…"

Nero recognized the handwriting and style. This recruitment notice was undoubtedly the work of Yunyun, the perpetually lonely Crimson Demon girl.

Having read fanfiction about Konosuba before, Nero vividly remembered one particular story. The protagonist, Fang Li, was so intimidated by the heaviness of Yunyun's notice that he immediately backed out and ended up joining Kazuma's chaotic party instead.

Even though Fang Li had the power to defeat gods and demons alike, Kazuma and his team drove him to the brink of madness repeatedly. Nero had a grudging respect for them—particularly Aqua, the so-called "smartest when intelligence has a color, and that color is blue." Despite often being hilariously clueless, Aqua somehow became a tactical genius when scheming to frustrate Fang Li, even roping in Darkness, Megumin, and unsuspecting townsfolk to outmaneuver him.

Nero had sworn back then: if she ever ended up in the Konosuba world, she would form a team with Yunyun to avoid Fang Li's pitfalls.

Yunyun was, after all, one of the few relatively sane people in this world.

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In a quiet corner of the guild, two Crimson Demon girls were chatting while eating. Their red eyes, paired with the mage hats and staffs beside them, made their lineage unmistakable.

"Megumin, how did it go today? Did you find a good party?" Yunyun asked, her tone curious but cautious.

"Nope. I went on a quest with some people yesterday and showed them my power by annihilating a huge monster in one shot. They seemed interested in forming a team, but the moment I said I only knew Explosion Magic and wasn't interested in learning anything else, they rejected me," Megumin said, stuffing food into her mouth as she spoke.

"See? I knew you were an idiot. You could've easily become the most sought-after Archmage if you'd just learned one high-tier spell. Instead, you chose Explosion Magic," Yunyun said with a sigh.

"Don't call me an idiot, Yunyun! I was born for Explosion Magic! When people hear the name Megumin, they should immediately think of Explosion Magic! And when they hear Explosion Magic, they should think of me, the world's greatest Explosion Magic user! All other magic is just second-rate nonsense! People who can't appreciate Explosion Magic don't deserve to be my teammates!"

"There's no one else in this world as ridiculous as you, Megumin!"

"Wait a second—did you just call people who like Explosion Magic 'ridiculous'? Are you picking a fight?! If you are, then let everyone witness the brilliance of my Explosion Magic right now!"

"W-Wait! Megumin, stop joking! Don't say something so terrifying in broad daylight—there are so many people here! Why are your eyes glowing redder? Please tell me you're kidding!"

Yunyun, now on the verge of tears, grabbed Megumin's shoulders and shook her desperately.

Fortunately, after much pleading, Yunyun managed to calm Megumin down, preventing her from blowing up the entire guild. Though this was a relief, it came at a cost: Yunyun had to promise to pay for Megumin's meals for the next seven days.

"You know, Yunyun, you should really be more realistic," Megumin said after gulping down a drink. "No one's ever going to respond to that depressing recruitment notice you posted."

"That's not true!" Yunyun protested. "Someone came to me yesterday because of that notice. He said he wanted to team up with me!"

Megumin choked on her drink. "What?! Who was it?!"

"Well… he looked like he could've been my dad's age," Yunyun said hesitantly. "He said, 'You're 13? Well… uh, I'm 13 too! So your notice mentioned a vanguard role? Don't worry, I've got you covered! I'm a high-level Crusader! Let me protect you, little lady!'"

"You rejected him, right? Tell me you rejected him!" Megumin shouted.

"I-I did, but he kept me company and even bought me lunch. He seemed really nice… He said he'd come back today to chat with me again."

"Perfect! I haven't used my daily Explosion yet, so I'll save it for that creep you just described—fat, unshaven, and probably hasn't bathed in half a month!"

"W-Wait! Why are things escalating again?!"

Just as Yunyun braced herself to stop Megumin's meltdown again, a new voice interrupted them.

"Ah, such fiery passion from beautiful maidens! Your playful bickering is like butterflies dancing in a field of flowers. I must say, I quite enjoy this spectacle! However, I must ask you to calm yourselves in my presence."

The two turned to see a striking woman in a red dress standing before them, her presence radiating authority and elegance.

"Tell me, adorable maidens—would you be interested in forming a team with me?"

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A true Champion knows that every battle, every choice, and every unexpected twist shapes the path to mastery. Consider this bonus chapter a rare encounter—one that wouldn't be possible without the right support.

That's why you should support WiseTL at [patreon.com/WiseTL]—where every pledge helps bring more high-quality translations to life, staying true to the original while flowing naturally in English. After all, excellence is in the details.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have more to prepare for. But you? You should take this opportunity—you never know what rare finds await.

—Cynthia