Nerves

'I should not have agreed, I should have refused and let him drown by himself. What have you gotten yourself into based on his guarantee? Do you remember the extreme sports and fighting he always got you involved with? Why do you not remember these things when Liem suggests doing something? This has life-long consequences. You forgave him for broken limbs and a shattered orbital socket? A lifetime with a woman, because he guarantees her? Kadir, you are so stupid.' Kadir thought with regret as they drew closer. He wanted to jump out and run.

"Is there any water. My mouth feels so dry?" Kadir asked. He voice croaked. Cold sweat dotted his forehead. He clenched his fists at his side. Clan Sedai's transport pulled up to the Allari Complex, Kadir felt the change in acceleration and looked out the window. He dry swallowed from the tension. His fathers embraced him emotionally, as they thought that this day would never come. His Father, Harrit, checked his ceremonial wear, fussing over his appearance. Kadir fit the tunic that had been passed down by every father in Harrit's line as it was made for him.

"Hahaha, look at him." Saeri Sedai laughed as she observed her brother. He was quiet and barely around. But he was still so sweet.

"Why are you laughing at me? It will be your day some day soon" Kadir questioned his sister. His thirteen-year-old sister sneered at him, annoyed at being forced to wake up for an impromptu spousal binding ceremony. Amrita caught the look and shot her a dirty look.

"Saeri, enough. This is the last time you will be seeing your brother for a long time." Amrita said as she chided her young heir's behavior. Kadir was at least thankful for that.

"Harrit, I do not think he can look any more perfect than how you have dressed him." Amrita tried to coax her fussing spouse to relax. "Here my son. Our stone." She passed her son an ornate box containing a large red gemstone that was beautifully set as a pendant. "On the day of your birth your Great Matriarch gifted this to you as my firstborn." Amrita said, her eyes welling with tears.

"You have made us so proud," Harrit said. He looped a sash of red flowers over his son's shoulders. They could not embrace him from this point onward until it was removed. That happened officially during the ceremony before the dancing. He looked like he could use an embrace.

"We will always have a home with us. Sedai will always have a room for you as I will always love you. Your sister will always care for you and her children too. You can do this." Amrita said to her son, worriedly that he would cause problems and reject his new spouse. Amrita placed a kiss carefully on her son's cheek, being cautious not to crush the flowers.

When Kadir expressed his concerns about binding initially, he thought it might be because of what happened by Leilanna Allari's hands. She thought that he may be traumatized or not like women. There were so few women in his life. When he went to the opposite side of the planet, whenever a Matriarch was looking to bind spouses she became more firm in her thoughts. She wished she could turn back time and prevent the pain. She trusted he would be safe with Dareem for that week. The compensation and political ally gained and compensation certainly increased Clan Sedai's wealth. But was it worth what it did to her son? At least he had a chance at happiness. Now that Liem was going to be involved in the relationship she knew that he would eventually accept the situation. Even if he fell out of favor, then it was worth the risk. If he did not try at all; she would regret it until the day she died.

'Perhaps she will treat him nicely,' Amrita thought.

Kadir spent his time learning and working on new autonomy projects to free the Daleths of potentially dangerous work and quality of life improvements to housing. She could not submit them, but was amazed by his thirst for knowledge and kind heart. He practiced mindfulness, meditation and various martial arts as per their family ways. He was not the kind of male that fawned and tried to impress women when he got the opportunity to meet them. He did not try to impress anyone. His overall demeanor could be seen as cold now. He was such a lively and sensitive boy. He was just so focused on helping and protecting the classes that he forgot about himself. He just reacted very poorly to women. She muttered a little prayer. The Sedai family disembarked the vehicle as the Halid finished. 

"Is there something more vibrant?" Cerez asked loudly. Kadir looked at his best friend with surprise. He was dressed for the ceremony as well. Cerez smiled. He looked nervous as well, but he was happy. His father was straightening his sash as the Allari filed out of the building to welcome them. Liem walked out dressed in formal wear, garnering the attention of both men. Allurai ceremonially greeted them.

"Finally, we bond as a family." Allurai cheered. Amrita, Allurai and Vida took turns embracing each other as the families mingled outside the complex. Cerez arched his brow and gave Kadir a look. The pair went in to find Liem to actually talk, as much as they verbally could with the doublespeak language they had all learned to use in the military outlet.

'Liem better know what he is doing.' Cerez thought. He smiled watching his mother. His emotions were much more turbulent under the surface.

Cerez walked in following Kadir. He passed the hall and looked in. She was sitting there so lonely, she looked like a girl. Normally, a clan's family would be with her. Her own mother should be standing behind her. But there was no one. No brothers to guard her, no fathers weeping. He calmed down a little and walked quickly with Kadir to Liem's room. He did not have the time to mull over her situation. As they entered the Matriarch Courtyard of the Allari Clan, Liem was still getting dressed. The room was still crowded with Dorien, Cevez and Dareem. "This is not enough. Why did you talk for so long?" Dorien complained.

"She does not have anyone to help her Father. Leilanna did not come to help her with anything or to explain the ceremony. Mother forgot. She needs to know what to do. I just pointed her to the right information", Liem said. Cerez sighed. Liem looked over with a smile on his face.

"Greetings Kadir of Clan Sedai, Greetings Cerez of Clan Halid." Cevez said. "Congratulations to you all on this day. You must be nervous. Here." Cevez said, full of excitement. He brought two large glasses of Liotte with a rich wild honey on the inside. The two men had grown so much since he had last saw them, although that day was not a good one. "Look how tall you have grown." Cevez said to Cerez, unknowing that it was a sore spot for him. Cerez wordlessly took the cup of Liotte from Cevez. Kadir reached for the cup and then swiftly drank down its contents. "Here," Cevez said as he grabbed the pitcher to refill the cup. His own mouth was so memorably dry on the day he was bound. He looked at the large man.

"Is that her alone in the Hall?" Cerez asked. Liem gave him a nervous look. "Shouldn't there be someone out there for her? Is there any elder?" he finished hearing the conversation as he walked in. Leilanna had left her alone, probably to make her a mockery.

"I will go." Dorien said, disappointed at his daughter's immaturity. Liem sighed.

"This is enough, let's just go." Liem said as he stood.