How to Heal a Broken Heart

Summary:

After the defeat of Drago Bludvist, Kala flees to the safety of the cove. How will she get through the pain of losing the only father figure she's had and dealing with the mental turmoil it caused? How will Hiccup be able to help her through it all?

Notes:

Hey my li'l embers! I know I said the next book would be on The Hidden World, but I figured you guys would be curious about what happens after Kala bolted, so here it is! Hope you guys like it!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

I have never been one to fear who I am. I have always been proud of the woman I have become and accepted that I am unique in more ways than one. Sure, there are the common fears I have like any dragon or Viking would. I fear losing the ones I love, eels, being abandoned, and failing to protect my home. But I never expected for a certain fear to join that list.

For the first time in the twenty winters I have roamed the lands and skies above, I feared…myself.

I feared that I would harm my family and friends without warning, with no recollection of even doing so to begin with. I feared that I would go feral and kill my entire tribe then flee to kill even more people without hesitation. I feared losing sight of who I am to bloodlust. And most of all, I feared that I betrayed my mate's trust.

But I know that I haven't. I know he doesn't blame me for our father's death. I could see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice each time he told me. And yet, there is still that nagging feeling that will not leave me that makes me feel as though I have ruined the trust between us.

Which is why I ran.

~~~HTLANF~~~

Kala didn't turn back as she bolted from the hut, not once stopping in her frantic sprint to get somewhere secluded from the one place that has truly felt like home to her in the past twenty winters of her existence. She didn't pay attention to where she was running to, she just ran like Akatosh himself was chasing her down to punish her for her wrong doings.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed or how she ended up at the bottom of the cove, but none of that mattered to her as she hid underneath the large roots that grew into the cove from above and laid down to rest.

~~~HTLANF~~~

The following morning, Kala awoke to the calming sounds of the waterfall and the wildlife that resided within the surrounding forest. She released a breath as she stood, stretching out her body before making her way to the lake.

As she looked upon her reflection on the water's surface, she froze in fear as tears welled up in her green orbs. What stared back at her was a terrified dragon and that made it all the more painful to look at. Kala swatted the water before backing away and transforming into her human form. She took long, deep breaths to calm her nerves as well as to prevent a panic attack, running her fingers through her hair that had been let down the day before by her mate's comforting gestures.

After what felt like hours, she was finally calm enough to finally let herself assess the situation before her. She stood in nothing but her night tunic, not thinking to grab any other clothing in her haste to flee the night before. But there was no turning back now. Kala would just have to do without until she either was able to face her tribe once again or until Hiccup inevitably came to check on her.

She then looked about the cove and crossed her arms, biting her lip. It was glaringly obvious to her that she would need a proper shelter to keep her warm and protected from the elements during her self-isolation from the other Berkians. Especially since she refused to transform again from fear of losing control of her own body once again. So the only option would be to build a proper shelter from what she had access to within the forest.

Once she got a meal in, she began to gather materials to make tools to hunt and gather wood as well as other things that would come in handy. Kala was able to make a sharp axe out of a chunk of rock that was close to the lake and tied it to a thick enough stick that it would hold for a good long while. She then trekked out of the cove in search of wood and vines to begin the construction of what she hoped deep down would be a temporary home.

~~~HTLANF~~~

It took a few days for Kala to get all the wood and vines she would need to make a proper shelter for her to survive in and a few days afterwards to construct it. Her body was covered in dirt as she put the finishing touches on the makeshift hut, her night tunic filthy from the week of hard work and treks through the forest to get what she required. Her hair was tied back in a very messy bun by a small piece of vine to keep it out of her face while she worked, riddled with knots, sweat, and dirt.

As she was admiring her handiwork, she heard none other than Hiccup enter the cove. The sound of his prosthetic making it all the more obvious who it was. Kala glanced at him and gave a small smile before she looked away as memories began flashing through her mind of what went down the week before.

"Was wondering when you would rush out here to check on me." She said as she tried wiping away the dirt that was clumping up upon her face from the sweat mixing into it.

Hiccup smiled sadly as he stopped by her side and took in her work. "I figured you needed some time to process, but my worry got the better of me today and I caved." He tore his gaze from the shelter and took in his mate's appearance. "The shelter looks good. Have you been working on it the whole time?"

Kala nodded as she tried desperately to cleanse her tunic of all the dirt and grime that had collected upon it in the past week. "I have. I needed a safe place to keep warm and dry from the elements once it gets closer to winter."

"You haven't transformed once, have you..?" Hiccup asked with concern coating his words.

Kala looked at the ground as she gripped her tunic nervously. "N-no…no I haven't…"

"Kala…"

Kala's eyes snapped up to him with tears brimming within them. "Can you blame me for that Hiccup? That was the form I was in when Dad died. That was the form that killed him. I can't even look at myself in the water in that form without being terrified of myself."

Hiccup's gaze softened significantly as he reached for her, but she flinched away and he lowered his hand. "I understand what you're going through milady…better than anyone else…let me help you…please…"

Kala held herself as she avoided holding eye contact with him, making herself seem smaller as she did. Hiccup sighed as he ran a hand through his hair then shook his head.

"Alright then…I'll come check on you some other time…I love you Kala…forever and always…" Hiccup said before kissing the top of her head and leaving the cove.

His heart ached when she never said 'I love you' back as he left.

~~~HTLANF~~~

As the fourth week of Kala's self-isolation was coming to an end, both her and Hiccup were beginning to feel the pain of being away from one another for so long. In the five years that they had been together, there was never a time where they were separated for almost a month and Hiccup's weekly checks on her were not helping their situation much either.

During a visit to Night Fury Isles, Revna had explained to the young dragons that this sort of thing could happen if they were separated for long periods of time. She said it was a sort of attention withdrawal or a type of depressive loneliness. The longer they spent apart, the stronger that feeling would become even if they spent time together for a little bit each week. Revna never explained how she knew so much about the feeling, but Kala could tell she and her father went through a situation that induced the feeling once before, maybe even many times before.

Kala didn't pay mind to her warning at first, but now she wishes that she had paid more attention to her mother's advice as she struggled to even get up from her lying position within her shelter. She felt completely drained of energy and her heart ached for Hiccup's presence. As thoughts of him filled her mind, she whined as tears formed in her eyes. Kala never realized just how much she missed being by Hiccup's side until now.

She had gotten so used to being beside her mate in the past five years that she forgot just how lonely it was being on her own in the wild. It's a wonder she has been able to keep herself from bolting back into the village just to be with her beloved Hiccup once again. But as she remembered what happened not even a month prior, she realizes why she hasn't gone back.

Just the thought of facing the tribe after what Drago made her do terrified her to her core. Deep down she knows that it wasn't her fault and the tribe wouldn't blame her for the death of their chief, but there was still that nagging feeling in her mind that made her think otherwise. But the more she thought it through, the more ridiculous her actions seemed to her. Why would the people who love and care for her ruin her connection with the rest of the tribe by telling them how Stoick truly died? There was no reason for them to, so why was she so scared of facing who she considers her nest?

Because there was nothing stronger than the fear of disappointing her tribe and being banished from her home. That was what kept her from returning. The fear of seeing the betrayal and disgust that she knows deep down wouldn't actually be there as she walked through the village she had become so familiar with in the time she has lived amongst the Berkians.

Kala's train of thought was broken as she saw her beloved mate enter the shelter, but not without struggle. She noted that he looked to be in just as much pain as she was as he practically flopped beside her on her makeshift bed of furs.

Just him being near her eased the pain and it seemed to have the same effect on Hiccup as well as the pained expression on his sun kissed face relaxed as he released a tired breath.

"Your mom wasn't kidding when she said the feeling of your absence gets worse the longer we're apart…" Hiccup breathed out as he slumped against the stone wall behind him.

Kala nodded in agreement as she crawled over to him and nestled herself into his side, a small purr forming in her throat as he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her ever closer.

"I'm sorry that I ran…I just didn't know what to do…or how to handle the pain…" Kala apologized as she finally felt completely comfortable and safe in what felt like ages as she snuggled with Hiccup for the first time since she fled the village.

Hiccup smiled softly and kissed the top of her head affectionately. "It's alright, love…I did the same thing after everything that happened the day Astrid revealed I was a Night Fury to the tribe, remember..?"

Kala smiled a bit as she played with the scales on Hiccup's flight suit absentmindedly. "Yes, I remember…you were unresponsive to me for the first week…it was heart wrenching…"

"How would you react if I told you that's how I feel seeing you crumbling like this..?" He asked as he ran his fingers through Kala's matted locks to try and get it smooth once again.

Kala's eyes widened as tears made themselves known again, her heart shattering as she realized just what she has put her mate through these past few weeks. She faced him and locked eyes with him for the first time that day as some tears threatened to fall from her green and black pools.

"I'm so sorry Hiccup…I-I didn't mean–"

He smiled sadly and placed a finger on her lips to stop her. "You don't need to apologize, milady…you're in pain and you didn't know what else to do…it's okay…"

"But–"

"No buts…what happened, happened and there is nothing we can do to change that…but what we can do is move forward and work towards healing our broken hearts and making Dad proud…" Hiccup said softly as he cupped Kala's face gently with his hand.

Kala leaned into his touch as her eyes closed in contentment. "Those words sound rather familiar…"

Hiccup chuckled as she peeked at him with one eye. "Probably because you said almost the exact same words to me the day Dad and I mended things…"

She stifled a laugh and smiled softly. "Yeah, I guess I did…I'm sorry that I've been so stubborn about accepting your help, Hiccup…I can't do this alone anymore…please help me…"

He smiled gently and kissed her ever so soft, which she graciously returned.

"Anything for you, milady…"

~~~HTLANF~~~

After Hiccup and Kala had their heart to heart after the month of being apart, Hiccup chose to stay in the cove with her. He decided to only leave every now and then to get supplies they would need and warmer clothes to keep them from freezing to death as the months began to get colder.

A week afterward, Kala got in a horrible fight with a wild dragon over some food. She had gotten beat up badly and lost to the Nadder in question. It didn't help that she still refused to transform into her dragon form to properly protect herself against enemies.

Kala clutched her side in pain as she hobbled weakly into the cove after admitting defeat and giving up her meal to the Deadly Nadder.

Hiccup's head snapped in her direction as he heard her and his eyes widened in worry. "Kala!"

Just as she was about to collapse from exhaustion, he was by her side and caught her. He looked her over to note all the injuries he would need to tend to as Kala clung to him tiredly.

"I-I'm okay…just got in a fight with a Nadder over some meat…I-I've had worse…" Kala brushed off.

Hiccup huffed as he scooped her up into his arms bridal style and began to make his way to the shelter. "How many times have I said not to go hunting on your own right now? It's too dangerous since you're still refusing to try transforming again. Also, does this mean you no longer have the Alpha title?"

Kala smiled sheepishly as her mate pushed through the makeshift door and lay her down on the furs. "M-maybe…"

~~~HTLANF~~~

It took close to a year for Kala to finally gather the courage to leave the safety of the cove and return to the village.

During that time it had taken over three months to get her used to being in her dragon form again, and it took even longer to get her comfortable with someone on her back. Not to mention it took her a very long time to get used to flying again with the aid of Hiccup. Kala refused to ever put her automatic prosthetic on unless absolutely necessary.

As the two Night Furies approached the village together for the first time in almost a year, Kala became nervous and stopped in her tracks.

Hiccup stopped as well and gave her a worried look. "What is it, love?"

"I…I don't know if I can do this…what if everyone hates me for running..? O-or hates me for killing Dad..? Maybe we should've just stayed in the cove…" She said as she looked at the forest floor, her cloak wrapped around her tightly for comfort.

Hiccup smiled sadly and squeezed her hand gently with his own. "Kala look at me." Kala looked at him slowly and he smiled warmly at her. "They won't hate you, okay? If anything, they'll be overjoyed to see you."

"A-are you sure..?"

Hiccup nodded, his smile never faltering. "Absolutely. Everyone asks how you're holding up every time I come to the village. They're all worried about you, love. Just like I was."

Kala's worries were washed away as his words sunk in and a small smile took residence on her lips. That was all Hiccup needed as he tugged her lightly to get back to walking, which she did without a fuss.

Hiccup had been right. The second the young Night Furies set foot in the village, the tribe was swarming them and rambling about how much they missed Kala and how worried they were about losing her for good. It made her tear up in joy to see that the other Berkians didn't despise her in the slightest and made her all the more happy to be among her nest once more.

"Hey lovebirds! C'mon! Valka found another Dragon Trapper ship!" Snotlout shouted from atop Hookfang's back.

"What do you say, milady? Wanna go help free some dragons?" Hiccup asked with a playful smirk.

Kala gave him a playful smirk in return. "Absolutely."

And with that, she transformed and Hiccup mounted her back. Once he was secured and opened her tailfin, they were airborne in no time with the other riders by their side.

~~~HTLANF~~~