Gratitude for the Help

"Thank you for taking the time to teach me."

As Amane had booked two days off work for Mahiru's birthday, he didn't have many shifts alongside Miyamoto. As a result, the session ended up happening later than initially planned. Upon arriving at work, he bowed his head to Miyamoto, who had arrived earlier and was already getting things ready.

Amane had learned a lot from Mahiru, but fortunately, his senior Miyamoto also took the time during their breaks to help him study. Miyamoto's teaching approach offered a different perspective from Mahiru's, and it came with a distinct level of strictness. Thanks to that, the material he studied was deeply ingrained into his mind.

"Hey, good work. That test must've been a pain. How'd it go?" "I managed to get a good score without any issues."

"I'm glad if I was of any help at all. Honestly though, you absorb knowledge like a sponge, Fujimiya. You pick things up so fast I feel you would've been fine even without my help."

"That's not true. It's thanks to you as well, Miyamoto-san."

Thanks to the help of both him and Mahiru, Amane was able to maintain his grades, and he felt indebted to them. In Miyamoto's case, he had nothing to gain from helping, yet he still went to assist him. His kindness was so overwhelming that it almost made Amane suspicious, wondering if there was some hidden motive behind it.

Miyamoto said, "If you have to resit a test, it'll mess with my schedule.

Plus, I've been cleaning up after Rino's mistakes for a while now, so teaching you as well isn't a big deal. It's just faster to put all the effort in from the start." Though Amane could see through his attempt to hide his embarrassment, he knew from Souji that pointing it out would only sour Miyamoto's mood. So, Amane quietly accepted the kindness, hoping to repay the favor someday.

"Your girlfriend must be really smart, huh?"

It seemed Miyamoto had picked up on the subtle hint in Amane's words, and a teasing grin spread across his face. In response, Amane simply smiled politely and said, "Oh, she certainly is," leaving it at that.

"Look at you smile. She must be something special. You two must be the perfect honor-student sweethearts."

"Honor students… I'm not so sure if I'm one, but I do think my grades are more on the better side. I've been doing university entrance exam prep since my first year, which helped."

"Yeah. I wouldn't peg you as one to mess around at school. Complete opposite of me."

"You don't seem like someone who would mess around either, though, Miyamoto-san."

Miyamoto joked about himself, but to Amane, he didn't seem like the type to get into real trouble at school. Sure, his appearance was light and stylish, giving off a laid-back, modern vibe, and he used a casual tone of voice, but at his core, Miyamoto was a grounded man. He had a steady presence and came across as someone serious, with a tendency to look after others. That was how Amane saw him.

"Weeell, I was more of an academic idiot. Well, still am. I was never a delinquent or got in trouble with the teachers, but I definitely had my fair share of messing around."

"Ah… I see…"

"It kinda peeves me that you're agreeing to that."

"Sorry, I don't mean to make fun of you. It's just that, uh, I got the feeling you're good at separating things. So, you probably enjoyed yourself without messing up your future."

Amane imagined that Miyamoto had likely found a balance—enjoying himself while keeping his school record intact and living a respectable life on campus. However, Amane didn't know for sure. The only people who knew what Miyamoto was like in high school were Miyamoto himself and, as he put it, his long-time friend Oohashi, who he jokingly said he was "stuck with."

"Spring never came for Daichi, though!"

Oohashi suddenly popped up from behind and let out a teasing laugh, making a "Keh keh keh" sound that seemed to cause a crack in Miyamoto's expression. Amane shuddered slightly at the sight. He was sure it was just his imagination, but he could have sworn he heard the words, "Whose fault do you think that is? Whose?" in reply.

"You act like it's spring all year round. I don't wanna hear that from you," Miyamoto retorted.

"Sore loser, eh?" "I'll pummel you." "Ooh, scary!"

Miyamoto let out a deep sigh as Oohashi, either oblivious to the pressure or simply used to it, exaggeratedly shivered with the same playful grin on her face. Amane, meanwhile, kept silent.

My condolences, he thought, but there was no way he could say that out loud. Instead, he quietly adjusted his apron, careful not to make any noise and avoid provoking them further.

✧ ₊ ✦ ₊ ✧

"I checked the schedule, and as I thought, you're not working around Christmas, are you, Fujimiya?"

As they closed the store after the last customers had left, Miyamoto suddenly remembered and called out to Amane.

Ah, my colleagues might not take too kindly to me taking time off during the busy Christmas season, especially since we're a café.

Amane quickly apologized, "Sorry about that." However, Miyamoto waved it off and said, "No, no, that's not it," looking slightly apologetic.

"I'm not criticizing you. You've got a girlfriend, so of course, you wouldn't want to leave her alone. I'm just happy you two are getting along so well. Actually, I heard Kayano's working during Christmas."

"What? He is?"

The unexpected information left Amane frozen in place. He didn't always work the same shifts as Souji, and they hadn't explicitly talked about Christmas, nor had he discussed it with Ayaka at school. Amane had simply assumed Souji would spend the holiday with her, so being told he would be working was a shock. While it might not be an issue for someone as mellow as him, Amane couldn't help but wonder—would Ayaka be okay with that…? Even though it wasn't his business, he found himself worrying. But before he could dwell on it, Miyamoto's words eased his concerns.

"Since it's Christmas, the staff are supposed to wear Santa outfits that day. Kayano said his girlfriend's coming just to see him wearing it."

"Oh… But I don't think those outfits are designed to show off muscles."

While Amane could understand the desire to see a boyfriend in a costume, it didn't quite seem to align with Ayaka's usual hobby. Santa outfits were not designed to emphasize muscles, so he couldn't even begin to imagine what Ayaka was thinking. It just didn't add up.

"Oh, his girl's into muscles? I've seen her a few times, but I didn't realize she had that kind of kink."

"You can't judge a book by its cover."

"True," Oohashi agreed. "Just look at Daichi—you think he's a playboy, but he's not as gaudy on the inside as he is on the outside."

"Huh? You wanna go?"

"Calm down, calm down—she was complimenting you…probably."

Do they have to keep adding fuel to the fire? Amane couldn't help but feel a headache coming on as he stepped in to mediate yet again. Both Oohashi and Miyamoto were the type to throw verbal punches one after the other, and it wasn't uncommon for them to bicker when out of earshot of the customers.

To be honest, Amane felt the real problem usually lay with Oohashi. She always reignited the fire, often being the first to make thoughtless remarks. But since this was how the two of them operated, Amane couldn't say much about it anymore.

As he tried to calm the situation and put out the figurative flames between them, his mind drifted to Souji, who wasn't with them today. He imagined him wearing a Santa outfit but couldn't quite figure out what part of that would make Ayaka so happy, leaving him scratching his head in confusion.

Each to their own, I suppose. Amane smiled awkwardly at Miyamoto, who still looked slightly tense.

"Well, I imagine girlfriends just want to see their boyfriends cosplay," Amane said. "Mine is quite keen on that, too."

"Wait, Fujimiya, does your girlfriend have some kind of fetish as well?" "Uh…no, I don't think so. Probably not…I hope."

So far, she shouldn't…or at least, Amane hoped so.

Though it seemed like Mahiru might have been slightly influenced by Ayaka, she hadn't yet developed any quirks that could be labeled clearly as a fetish. Amane hoped she would stay just as she was, but at the same time, he couldn't deny that it would be nice for her to find more things she enjoyed.

"Well, if I had to say…maybe she's got a fetish for me?" That was as close to the truth as he could get.

Mahiru loved Amane for who he was, not just any particular part of him. At least, that's what Amane believed. While Mahiru did like his muscles, she had made it clear that she had no interest in anyone else's body. It seemed that because she loved Amane himself, she appreciated every little aspect of him, but it all stemmed from her feelings for him as a person.

"Ooh, look at you, all loved to bits, Fujimiya-chan."

"You should try loving someone just as much," Miyamoto taunted. "Tryna call me fickle? I'm just quick to heat up and cool down, thank you very much."

"Like that's any better."

"All right, all right," Amane intervened. "Everyone has their own way of thinking. As long as you end things without hard feelings, isn't that fine?"

Oohashi, who often called herself a "hopeless romantic," fell in love frequently and quickly. However, she made it clear that juggling multiple relationships simultaneously was both ethically and morally ludicrous, which, for those listening, was at least enough to relieve the uneasy feeling in their stomach. That said, it was still painful to witness the emotional toll it took on Miyamoto, who had a soft spot for her. In that sense, it was a different kind of stomachache. However, the irony of the situation was that Miyamoto and Oohashi were the only ones unaware of the tension they created.

"It's hard to have bad feelings when most guys probably just back off after you loosen up a bit and they realize you're not what they expected."

"Rude! That was only a handful of times!" "So it did happen."

"It's not like I try to hide anything anyways. I'm always just being myself."

With a confident chest puff and an unveiled, self-assured smile, Oohashi was, to put it mildly, a gorgeous woman. Bright, energetic, and easy to get along with, she undoubtedly attracted plenty of attention.

However, upon stepping back, Amane could imagine that the deeper someone got involved with Oohashi, the more they'd find she wasn't quite what they initially thought. If someone went into a relationship seeing her as a well-put-together person, they'd likely have that image flipped upside down. After all, without Miyamoto keeping an eye on her, Oohashi tended to be careless and absent-minded.

"Yeah, most people would struggle to be as plain-spoken as you." "You mocking me?"

"Now, now. He just means that you're honest and have nothing to hide." As Amane glanced at the shift schedule posted behind the counter, reflecting on how vital word choice could be, he noticed that, like himself, Oohashi was also not scheduled to work on Christmas.

"Oh, Oohashi-san, so you aren't working on Christmas either." "Yeah, got me a boyfriend."

"…Is that so?" Amane was at a loss for words at how quickly Oohashi entered another relationship.

Instinctively, his gaze slid over to Miyamoto. To his surprise, Miyamoto showed no sign of being shaken—perhaps he had grown used to this by now. Instead, he sighed deeply, almost as if to say, "Here we go again." Amane was sure that the distant look in her eyes wasn't just his imagination.

"She does have a pretty face, at least," Miyamoto said.

"What's that supposed to mean? Like that's all I have going for me?" "Let's be honest, your smarts aren't really making the cut. Also, your taste in men. They're all fools who only care about what's on the outside." "That's rude on so many levels!"

"I bet a single eyelash you'll break up before Christmas."

"Isn't that way too low of a bet? And seriously, what value does that even have?"

"It means it's so obviously gonna happen that it's not even worth betting anything valuable, you absolute idiot."

"That's so mean! Any thoughts on that, Fujimiya-chan??"

"I don't know much of your love life or lifestyle, Oohashi-san, so…no comment."

It was best to avoid getting caught in the crossfire, so Amane wisely offered a plausible excuse and tactfully removed himself from the conversation.

"The bet's not even worth making at this point."

"Not that there'll be anything to bet on anyway since we'll last through Christmas!"

"Remember that, Fujimiya. She'll probably come crying to you later.

Same thing happened last year."

"I'm not the same person I was back then!" "Debatable."

"…I feel like you two actually get along really well."

Whether or not this could genuinely be called "getting along" was debatable, but they were definitely in sync in their own way. Amane casually offered a comment and quickly excused himself, using the pretext of washing a dishcloth to quietly slip away from the two, making sure not to get caught in their banter.

"Miyamoto-san, you might want to soften your approach a little bit.

Otherwise, Oohashi-san will only push you away. No matter how right you might be, she will get defensive and stubborn if you talk down to her."

"…I know that."

After witnessing Oohashi's somewhat unreasonable behavior, Amane waited until she was out of earshot and quietly shared his advice with Miyamoto. In response, Miyamoto nodded grimly, his voice low, as though he had swallowed something bitter.

✧ ₊ ✦ ₊ ✧

"Just to confirm, you aren't interested in seeing me dress up as Santa, are you?"

"Huh?"

When he got home after dinner, Amane happened to glance at the magazine on the low table. Mahiru had likely put it there, and it featured a Christmas special on the cover. It suddenly reminded him of the costumes at work, prompting him to ask.

As he had already requested time off, Amane wouldn't work on Christmas, so he had no reason to wear a Santa costume. However, he couldn't help but wonder if, like Ayaka, Mahiru might find some appeal in the idea of her boyfriend in a Santa outfit. To his surprise, she responded more positively than he'd expected. She looked back at him with glistening eyes—something he could usually hardly imagine from Mahiru.

He was reminded, with a sense of bewilderment, that there was no telling what might hit someone's sweet spot.

"Why do you look super interested?"

"If given the chance, I would love to see it. After all, I like how you look no matter what you wear, Amane-kun."

"I'm not planning to wear it." "Ehh…"

Amane watched as Mahiru's shoulders visibly slumped in disappointment. This made him want to do something for her, but since he wasn't planning to buy or wear any costume, he'd like to ask her to bear with it this time. After all, although he wasn't going to wear a Santa costume, he planned to do at least one thing Santa would do.

"Please don't look so disappointed. It's just that at work, the staff working on Christmas Eve and Day have to wear Santa costumes. Kido's planning to go just to see Kayano wearing it."

"…So Kayano-san is working during Christmas?" "Kido hadn't mentioned anything to you?"

"No, nothing in particular. She wasn't feeling down either." "As long as they're both okay with it, I guess it's fine." "Actually, I do remember her smiling quite a lot…"

"Ah… She must be looking forward to watching Kayano at work."

Souji didn't seem to have any issues with dressing up—if he did, he probably wouldn't have chosen to work on those days. So, it was likely something they both agreed on without any problems.

Even though Souji had to work on Christmas, Ayaka didn't seem upset.

On the contrary, she must have been excited to see him. It was clear that she placed a lot of trust in him. There was also a chance that Ayaka might have heard about the Santa costume from Fumika and asked him to wear it, but the truth remained a mystery.

It's a good thing they got along so well, Amane nodded.

When he noticed Mahiru's unusually quiet reaction and shifted his focus to her, he realized a little too late that she looked up at him as if she had something to say.

"What's the matter?"

"…I was just thinking about how lucky Kido-san is." "Lucky?"

"Um, I was wondering when I will see you working, Amane-kun." "…J-Just wait a little longer, please."

While she wasn't angry about being made to wait, Mahiru felt impatient and frustrated. Talking about Ayaka must have stirred up those feelings again, reigniting the anticipation that had settled down within her. Amane held her back from doing something she should be free to pursue, and he knew that. He couldn't blame her for feeling upset.

"I can wait until you are comfortable, Amane-kun, but I still feel a bit impatient. It's as if I'm being put on hold."

"I think I'll be used to it by next year. I'll invite you when there aren't too many people around."

"If you keep me waiting too long, I'll start feeling lonely."

"I'm really sorry. Please wait until I'm at least half-comfortable…if not fully."

"I'm good at waiting, so I don't mind…but may I add one condition?" "…A condition?"

"I won't ask for anything major. Umm, I was hoping you could show me a picture of you while working. I haven't seen you in your café uniform yet, and I want to see how handsome you look."

Even Mahiru wasn't fond of being made to wait too long, so she dropped a modest request on Amane, asking for just a small favor.

Mahiru's reasoning was understandable—if she couldn't visit him while he worked, a quick picture of him in action wouldn't be too much to ask.

Amane didn't see a problem with sharing a single, carefully chosen picture rather than letting her see his inexperienced self in person. He couldn't help but wonder if it was something she wanted to see that badly. Then again, if he had heard that Mahiru was wearing something cute from Chitose, he'd certainly like to see it for himself, too.

So, since it would ease even a bit of her agitation, Amane quickly agreed without hesitation. The way her expression immediately brightened showed how badly she'd wanted to see him in his uniform. Amane still felt as if it didn't quite suit him. It felt more like something he was forced to wear. But, if it made Mahiru's day, it was worth it.

Smiling softly at the thought that her cheerful mood was something she showed only around him, Amane gently took her hand as she leaned her head against his upper arm, snuggling up to him.

"I did manage to get Christmas Day off, which is great. But…I'm working right up until the day before. Are you okay with that?"

He felt awful about dampening her good mood, but it was something he had to confirm.

In exchange for securing Christmas Day off, Amane had packed his shifts heavily leading up to Christmas, and he would also be working several consecutive days after. Although he'd be home by evening after Christmas, he would still leave Mahiru—his girlfriend—alone for part of it.

Despite his concerns, Mahiru, without a moment of hesitation or any sign of doubt, simply shook her head. "That's what you decided to do, so I won't object."

"That's not what I meant," Amane began to clarify. "I'm asking if you're okay with it. The truth is, I'm making you feel lonely."

"You know, I feel that you are looking down on me slightly, Amane-kun." "Looking d—?"

Amane was left speechless. He hadn't at all expected her to say such a thing. Mahiru gazed at him with calm eyes and a serene, gentle smile.

"Of course, I do get lonely sometimes. I always catch myself wishing you'd come home quickly. I just want you by my side all the time to spend even more moments together."

"Then maybe the job isn'—"

"Even so, I don't think it would be right for me to tie you down. I understand that you want to prioritize me. In the same way, I also want to put you first above everything else, Amane-kun."

Mahiru's fingers gently stroked the palm of his hand.

"But Amane-kun, the last thing I want…is to become a burden to you." "A burden? I don't think of you that way at all."

"That's just how I see it. If I make you prioritize my wants too much, I won't be able to accept myself."

"…What if I say it's okay?"

"That would mean you would concede to me, wouldn't it? I don't want you to wear yourself down for my sake or hold back on what you want to do. I want us to be equals—I don't think it's healthy if only one of us always prioritizes the other."

Her flaxen hair rippled like a flowing river as she gently shook her head.

For a brief moment, Amane could see something in Mahiru's eyes—a mixture of kindness and perhaps a faint hint of disappointment, not directed at him but at herself, that quickly surfaced and sank deep within.

"My feelings are my own," Mahiru continued, "as are these feelings of loneliness. They are mine. I won't deny my wish to keep you by my side, but I don't expect you to make sacrifices to fulfill it. If I forced you to prioritize me over what you want to do, I would only feel disappointed in myself."

"Mahiru…"

"You have a clear idea of something you would like to do, and that's why you searched for a job, correct?"

"Yes." Amane nodded immediately.

Amane had a promise and a goal for himself—something he was determined to fulfill. That was why he had started working part-time. It wasn't for Mahiru or anyone else; it was for himself. No matter what, he couldn't use the excuse that he was doing it for her. He chose to pursue this, and he had no regrets or shame about his source of motivation. Mahiru understood that, and she supported him, watching over him while respecting his decisions.

"I could never let myself be the reason you surrendered something you decided to pursue," Mahiru firmly stated, cutting through the sense of guilt Amane had felt toward her like butter. Then, as if to relieve the tension between them, she smiled tenderly.

"It would be one thing if I were being neglected, but you always respect and cherish me, making time for us while also dedicating parts to what you need to do. I've never been unhappy with that, and I would never ask you to dedicate all of your time to me. I'm happy that there's something you're so passionate about," Mahiru clarified gently. Then, her smile turned into one of slight disbelief as she said, "You tend to neglect yourself because you care about me too much."

Her eyebrows drooped as if to say, "Just what am I going to do with you?"

Yet beneath her mild frustration was a feeling of joy.

"While I do think I can be more selfish than you might expect, I still have no intention of disregarding your feelings. Amane-kun, you and I are two different individuals. Our thoughts will differ no matter how much we care for each other. It would be impossible to perfectly align our actions, values, and everything else."

"Agreed."

"And that's precisely why we need to adjust to one another to continue moving forward together. I would never ask you to make sacrifices for me, okay? …I want to live alongside you, Amane-kun. Together, at the same pace."

As Mahiru finished, she sighed softly while gently tracing her fingertips across Amane's palm, lightly tickling him.

"If I ever forced you to sacrifice yourself for me, I would hate myself. I think I would die from the guilt the very same day. It's one thing to desire something, but the moment you force that desire onto someone else, it changes everything. If it were me, I would start questioning myself—like, 'When did I become a selfish, narrow-minded person who tries to control others and make them do as I please?' I would never be able to forgive myself for it."

While Amane felt happy knowing he was loved so dearly, for Mahiru, it was something she could never imagine doing. She even shuddered slightly at the mere idea, as if the thought alone was unbearable.

It was true that, given Mahiru's usual attitude, such behavior was unimaginable. However, if she ever reached the point where she expressed her desires so strongly, Amane didn't think it should be something to dismiss. Perhaps he felt this way because, having seen her up until now, he understood that, for Mahiru, he was her one and only. She had endured far too much. She had suppressed her feelings in so many facets of her life.

"So, there's nothing for you to worry about. When I think about how you're working so hard toward something, you always look so cool and admirable to me."

"…How pathetic I must be, making you say all this."

"Why are you getting sad now? Honestly…"

Mahiru claimed she was good at waiting, but more than anyone, Amane understood why she had become so skilled at it—why she had grown accustomed to it. Amane bit his lip; he knew that denying Mahiru's choices to remain true to herself would be the same as disregarding her feelings. So, instead, Amane simply accepted the hand she'd extended toward him.

It was hard to say who was trying to reassure whom. Perhaps they were both trying to comfort each other. Mahiru's slender arms reached out for Amane. He welcomed her with open arms, gently wrapping her dainty body in his embrace as she snuggled into him willingly.

"In exchange, when we're cuddling together like this, I make sure to be as selfish and needy as I can. Is that…okay?"

"Of course it is… You should even do that more often. You should ask for what you want. I'd like to hear more of your requests."

"Then, let's see… May I ask you to warm me up…just a little more?" Peering up from within his arms, Mahiru flashed Amane a devilish smile. "As you wish."

Mahiru, purring contentedly, nuzzled her cheek against Amane's chest, cuddling closer and basking in his warmth. While it was hard not to notice the softness of her body yielding so easily against him, what filled Amane's heart even more was the affection and fondness he felt for her. She was leaning on him, drawing as much comfort and energy as she could, and that only made her seem all the more precious in this moment.

As he held her gently, he was determined to share and provide all the warmth she sought. Mahiru let out a soft, ticklish sound, almost like another purr.

"Hehe, you're so warm… I feel completely satisfied, Amane-kun. Thanks to you."

"Is it enough?"

"It's plenty… I'll recharge lots while I still can."

"Don't worry—I'll let you recharge your batteries whenever you like." "As long as it's within a reasonable limit, okay? …After all, I'm sure you need to recharge too. When you're tired, remember to lean on me too." Mahiru, who was currently the one getting all the fawning, asserted that firmly. The irony was too much for Amane, and he couldn't help but chuckle, his laughter causing his back to shake. Seeing him laugh, Mahiru also let out a soft, amused giggle as if she couldn't help but join in.

✧ ₊ ✦ ₊ ✧

"Ah, Miyamoto-san, I'd like to ask you something."

By the time his next shift rolled around, Amane had kept his promise, filling a small gap that was Mahiru's loneliness.