Chapter 20: The Case of the Phantom Budget

With the Department of Ridiculous Ideas behind them (or, more accurately, buried under a mountain of bad decisions and dead pigeons), Cahaya's government faced its next challenge. It was budget season, and Roy K, as always, was blissfully unprepared.

The annual Budget Assembly, a massive event where the government presented its financial plans to the public, was just a week away. Ministers, advisors, and economists were working day and night to finalize the numbers except for one person.

Roy K spent his days in his office doodling plans for a mango-flavored ice cream factory.

"We Need to Talk About the Budget"

Aziz burst into Roy's office, carrying a stack of files taller than Bahadur the goat.

"Sir, have you even looked at the budget?"

Roy blinked at him. "Why would I need to? That's your job, isn't it?"

Aziz groaned. "Sir, as Prime Minister, it's your responsibility to present the budget. You need to know what's in it."

Roy waved a hand dismissively. "Just give me the highlights. You know, the big stuff. People don't care about the details they care about the vibe of the budget."

"The vibe?" Aziz repeated, incredulous. "Sir, this is about the country's finances, not a music festival."

"Exactly! Keep it simple. Tell the people we're making Cahaya great again, and they'll love it."

Aziz pinched the bridge of his nose. "Sir, that won't work this time. We're running a massive deficit thanks to… well, you."

Roy frowned. "How is this my fault?"

Aziz gave him a deadpan look. "The Spudspire, the pigeons, the techno anthem, the goat do I need to continue?"

The Missing Money

As if the budget deficit wasn't bad enough, a bigger crisis loomed. That evening, Farah, the Finance Minister, stormed into Roy's office with a pale face.

"Sir," she began, trying to stay calm, "there's a problem."

"Is it about the budget?" Roy asked. "Because Aziz is handling that."

"It's worse than that," Farah said. "We're missing money. A lot of money."

Roy blinked. "Define 'a lot.'"

"Enough to fund the entire education system for two years," Farah said flatly.

Aziz, who had just walked in, dropped his coffee mug. "WHAT?"

Farah nodded grimly. "We've combed through the accounts. The funds are gone, and there's no paper trail. It's like they vanished into thin air."

Roy leaned back in his chair, stroking his chin like a detective. "This is serious. We're dealing with… a phantom thief."

Aziz looked at him. "Sir, this isn't a mystery novel. We need to figure out where the money went and fast."

The Investigation Begins

Roy insisted on leading the investigation himself, much to everyone's horror.

"This is a job for Detective Roy!" he declared, donning a deerstalker hat and pulling out a magnifying glass.

Aziz groaned. "Sir, can we leave this to the professionals? Like the police or forensic accountants?"

"Nonsense!" Roy said. "I'll solve this case in no time. Let's start with the suspects."

Roy pulled out a whiteboard and wrote:

1. Aziz

• Motive: Always stressed. Might want to retire early with stolen money.

• Evidence: None, but he's always yelling about something. Suspicious.

2. Farah

• Motive: Controls the budget. Too obvious? Or is that what she wants us to think?

• Evidence: Once laughed at one of Roy's jokes, clearly hiding something.

3. Meowster

• Motive: None, but cats are sneaky.

• Evidence: Frequently sleeps on Roy's desk. Could be covering up clues.

Aziz stared at the board in disbelief. "Sir, this is ridiculous."

"That's why it's called the Department of Ridiculous Ideas," Roy replied smugly.

"That's not even" Aziz began, but gave up mid-sentence.

A Break in the Case

Against all odds, Roy's investigation stumbled upon a lead. During a late-night stakeout in the Finance Ministry, he overheard two junior clerks whispering about "Project Blackhole."

"What's Project Blackhole?" Roy asked, stepping out of the shadows and startling them.

The clerks turned pale. "We don't know!" one stammered. "It's just something we've heard about in passing!"

Roy's eyes narrowed. "Tell me everything, or I'll make you manage pigeon logistics for a month."

The clerks spilled everything they knew, which wasn't much. "We think it's some kind of secret slush fund, but no one knows who controls it."

Roy grinned. "A slush fund! That's the kind of juicy twist this case needed."

The Phantom is Revealed

With Aziz and Farah reluctantly in tow, Roy traced the slush fund to an obscure account in the National Treasury labeled simply as "Special Projects." The account had been draining money from various ministries for months.

When they finally confronted the account's creator, it turned out to be none other than…

Uncle Bob.

Yes, that Uncle Bob the ex-Minister of Parks and Recreation, who had resigned years ago under mysterious circumstances.

"What are you doing here?" Roy asked, genuinely shocked.

Uncle Bob smirked. "Oh, I've been here all along, running this little operation under your nose. It's amazing what you can get away with when no one pays attention to the details."

Roy blinked. "Wait, you mean… this is my fault?"

Aziz threw up his hands. "YES, SIR! THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING!"

Roy Saves the Day

Uncle Bob had been siphoning money to fund his luxurious retirement plans, including a private island and a fleet of yachts named after different types of cheese.

But Roy, in a rare moment of clarity, turned the tables.

"I hereby confiscate all your assets and return the money to the treasury!" Roy declared.

Uncle Bob laughed. "You can't do that. It's already gone."

Roy grinned. "Oh, I think not."

It turned out that Roy's earlier mango-related antics had accidentally led to the freezing of several offshore accounts including Uncle Bob's. By sheer dumb luck, the stolen funds were recoverable.

The Budget is Saved

With the stolen money returned, Cahaya's budget crisis was averted. The media hailed Roy as a hero, though Aziz privately knew it was pure chance.

"Sir," Aziz said after the Budget Assembly, "you really are the luckiest man alive."

Roy smiled. "Aziz, it's not luck. It's strategy."

Meowster let out a skeptical meow, and for once, Aziz couldn't agree more.

End of Chapter 20