I lied

Jake was feeling his heart on the throat and looking at the frozen Philip made his nerves heightened to a-whole-nother level.

"Should we just call the police?" Suggested Jake hugging phillip who was quick to disagree with every fiber of his being.

"He just came back from there!" Argued back Philip, still shaken from the continuous door alarm.

"So this is how we are going to die, huh?" Mumbled Jake shaking his head in disgust and resigning to their fate, "In men clothing"

"Maybe we won't die here" Said Philip in a small voice. He still had hopes though, dim as they were.

"How about you try believing it first, for a start?" Jake pointed out the flaw making them laugh bitterly before getting serious once more, looking at each other. Overdramatizing the scene, making it sound worse than it was.

"I'm sorry for roping you into all my messes" Muttered Philip absentmindedly making Jake scoff dismissively.

"Trust me. I wouldn't stand how miserable and boring my life would be without you. Thank you for taking me in" Said Jake sincerely. He was dead grateful.

"If I'm going to die as a boy at least let me do it in style" Said Philip pulling out his makeup kit before applying it on his face, getting out of Jake's embrace.

"You are facing him?" Asked Jake, double taking Philip.

"I'm too old to be running around and hiding" Replied Philip, steeling his resolve.

"That's a fact" Agreed Jake before going to the door and opened it.

"Nona!" Called out Andy heaving a sigh of relief as he moved away from Aiden to Jake's side, "Please, tell me Philip is in there"

"Would you all like to get inside?" Asked Jake keeping the door ajar for them to get inside. And through it all, Aiden was scanning the long corridor to Jake's sitting room where he found Philip frozen to the couch. He was alive.

Aiden didn't know what to do. He was going crazy with things to say and do in his head since the night before.

He couldn't even sleep and honestly didn't consume a thing and even as he was looking at Philip, he was surprised that it wasn't out of anger. He just missed his man.

"Hi mama" Greeted Aiden kneeling in front of Philip, he was trying so hard not to touch him nor cry his eyes out.

Philip didn't want to feel that much terrified but, he was. He lied and kept it a secret for so long and now it was out. Aiden was already there and all he could think of was jumping on the guy and hide his dark sides, in ways he couldn't begin to tell.

His relationship with Aiden was weird even to him. It wasn't the hopeless, helpless kind that he felt towards his family when they opened the door for him to go nor was it an improvised trapped agreement/choice just like the one he had with Stanley.

With Aiden it was much more dangerous. Aiden had the power over Philip that nobody else had, not even Philip himself.

"You don't look so good" Said Aiden worriedly making Philip laugh dryly and unexpectedly. Shocking even himself.

"Have you met the mirror?" Asked Philip pointedly. He was thrown off the track with that. After scaring himself half to death, that was the first thing he said to him?

"Do I look that awful?" Asked Aiden feigning ignorance for he knew for shit, how dead he looked.

"No" Replied Philip with a small smile before cupping Aiden's cheeks in his hands, having a feel of the sharp stubble that formed there, "You can never look awful"

"How was your sleep?" Asked Aiden as he leaned in further to Philip's touch. He was craving that warmth like a moth to a flame. Can't they just stay like that forever? Is that what people call, ups and downs?

"We'll be inside if you need us" Said Jake awkwardly when the cringe was getting too much to bear, "Just shout for help if you need help"

"So, how are you?" Asked Aiden again after Andy and Jake went inside only to see tears trailing down Philip's cheeks making Aiden panic.

"I'm sorry. I knew to leave you be but, I couldn't. I tried not to think nor call you and simply wait but, I just wanted to know why you left in the first place and if I can ever make it right. Can't you just say what's on your mind?" Rambled on Aiden, struggling to dry Philip's tears tenderly.

"Aiden..." Called out Philip when he saw just how much he was hurting him with his silence, "I'm sorry I left without a word"

"I just want to know if you'll return to me, Philip" Explained Aiden as he looked up to his everything in a week.

"Call me mama again, please" Mumbled Philip subconsciously making them shock before, Philip avoided Aiden's gaze.

"Should I expect you home one of these days then?" Asked Aiden expectantly.

"You didn't come to take me with you?" Asked Philip confused and kind of hurt. Talk about drama in war times.

"No. Only when you are ready to come back. I just came to assure you of that option" Clarified Aiden as he took Philip's in his arms but, before he can settle there Philip killed the moment.

"Grayson didn't tell you?" Asked Philip as an afterthought. Something was not right. Was Aiden escaping the problem to save him face?.

"Tell me what?" Asked Aiden genuinely confused. They had secrets with Grayson? Since when? Was that why Tyler said to ask Grayson when he asked about Philip's whereabouts? Did they have a fight?

"Aiden, I lied to you since the beginning" Started off Philip sadly.

"And this relates to Grayson? How?" Asked Aiden confused or maybe jealous.

"He found out about the lie and I ran in fear" Explained Philip dryly.

"Is it that serious?" Questioned Aiden not sure if the lie was that big for him to hide like that.

"I don't know you from two years ago. You don't have selective amnesia. You didn't hide me nor cheat on me with Mia and most importantly, I don't think you are a closeted gay" Said Philip truthfully as he looked down, ashamed only to be caressed on his cheek by Aiden.

"I had a feeling" Said Aiden with a smile, So yeah, the cat was out of the bag. What would he do to make Philip stay if he decided to go? That it was all an experience.

"And you never questioned me!?" Asked Philip proving his hypothesis to be true. So, he knew and still chose to keep it hidden with him. Why?, "How come you never said anything?"

"I wasn't sure and I didn't want to dwell on things that doesn't matter" Replied Aiden casually making Philip more angry.

"You think this doesn't matter? I don't matter? We don't matter? What else are you hiding from me? For all I know you are here to put me in my place. You could be scheming a deadly plan" Accused Philip angrily.

"I honestly don't get why you are angry at this moment" Called out Aiden hands in the air in a surrendering gesture.

"You always do this Aiden. Let's talk about this! Beat me up, break up with me, do anything to me... Just, don't make me walk on eggshells around you!" Demanded Philip.

"I still don't get what's happening but, I want to know why you lied to me" Expressed Aiden his concern making the situation a little bit contained.

"I didn't want it to end" Said Philip ashamed, "You were an amazing lay I ever had in forever. So gentle, in tune with my body and soul, you made sex feel like something more than just bodies crushing together"

"I'm flattered but, so was it just sex between us?" Asked Aiden confused.

"No! I love you!" Said Philip as he grabbed the back of Aiden's neck tightly to make him look deep into his eyes.

"And I love you! So much that it doesn't make sense... I'm fucking obsessed with you! If I could? I would wish to possess every bit of you" Said Aiden frustrated, "You knew all that but still chose to overthink things as usual"

"You're not mad that I lied?" Asked Philip confused.

"I'm mad! So mad that I fear for my life... I'm mad that you don't trust me enough to work on our worries together. Did I ever gave you a reason to fear me?" Asked Aiden seriously.

"You never Express your emotions like any next person, Aiden. And last night? You fucking raided Stanley's club! Who does that?" Reminded Philip accusedly.

"So, you were there?" Asked Aiden feeling hurt.

"No! I just saw a video and I was afraid that you'd break up with me if you ever saw me again" Explained Philip sincerely.

"And you decided to ghost me instead?" Asked Aiden frustrated, "Like that doesn't hurt a bunch"

"You still have Grayson" Pointed out Philip in a small voice, sulking making Aiden flip.

"What the fuck does Grayson has to do with us?" Asked Aiden super tired and angry. Was that how Philip felt whenever he mentioned Mia before? That was rude! "What?"