Blind and Broken

The days vanished into a blur as Sunny and Nephis made the best of the time they had left. They didn't care for anything but themselves, and that meant that no one had seen them in a while.

Currently, the only one who knew what was going on was Cassie. She had no idea how to approach Nephis and, quite frankly, didn't have the energy to deal with her at the moment.

She knew she had made mistakes that were unforgivable, but she did them out of love. In a twisted way, for a love she knew she would never be able to explore.

That… took a toll on her.

No matter how much she had tried to push that feeling down and lock it away, there was no escaping it. That's why she did what she did: because she knew what her end goal was.

Saving the world from a fate that she and her friends would not be able to stop when it arrived. Even if it meant hurting the person she loved the most.

Her thoughts were something she shared with no one. How could she? There wasn't another person who could understand her. Not another Seer or another human in general. Maybe the Daemon Weaver would be able to understand her.

She was sure that a being whose domain was tied to fate would be able to see behind the veil of despicable actions and understand that what she was doing was necessary.

Currently, she was sitting in the Ivory Tower, her office calm as ever. Not a single person in sight. Well… not that she would know. She felt conflicted about the things she had done in the past.

'Was it all really the right choice? Telling Nephis his true name? Influencing his life in a way that served my goals? After all those years, I'm not so sure anymore.'

She had no tears left to shed; no wall was left without markings of her outburst. Although she was not the most physically capable saint, she was a saint nonetheless. And the walls of the Ivory Tower had to endure her frustration, no matter what people would think of her.

"Not even Kai is talking to me anymore. When such a kind soul is forsaking me, how can I believe that my goals justify my actions any longer?"

She mumbled under her breath while sitting against a broken bookshelf. The bottle of whiskey tightly wrapped in her hand, she sobbed, but no tears were left to carry her sadness away.

Suddenly, the door swung wide open. It startled Cassie; she had not expected any visitors and was sure whoever it was would not be here to share any kind words with her.

When the voice of Nephis rang in her ear, she didn't even muster up the strength to give her a smile. She was sure whatever Nephis was here for would not be worthy of giving her pleasantries.

"You look… different. I see you have not been too well these last few days."

Nephis was shocked to see her friend in such a state, but she didn't really worry. Cassie would be fine, like she always was.

That is what a fool would believe. But Nephis was no fool; she knew that Cassie was far from fine, and no matter what she had done or planned to do, she was still a dear friend to her.

What made Nephis act so indifferent in the face of her broken friend was not ignorance. Instead, she couldn't find it in herself to care anymore. She was hurt, and the reason for that lay in the dust like a drunk right at her feet.

Nephis walked over to Cassie, who in response looked up at her with an even look on her face. At least she tried to, but ended up looking at a random point on the ceiling.

"You act like I should care about anything you say anymore. I'm not in the mood to talk to you, Neph. Don't let me hurt you any more than I already have. Do it like the others and leave me. Leave me like you should have on the Forgotten Shore. At least that way, you all would be faring much better without me."

As she took another sip from the bottle of whiskey, she found solace in a hand colliding with the bottle, which moments later exploded on the wall next to her, spilling the gold-brown liquid everywhere.

In the next moment, she was pulled from the floor faster than she could react to retort. Nephis held her by the shoulders, close to her face, and spoke, her voice broken and betraying her intentions to act infuriated.

"You… you think this is the solution? Drowning yourself in alcohol until what? Until you die? Have you given up already? You think I saved you back then because I wanted to use you?"

Nephis couldn't help but chuckle at the absurdity of the situation.

"No, Cassie, I saved you because I felt like it was the right thing. I made the decision to do so because I believed that you are a good person. And I still do. I won't act like I know it all and judge you based on my principles. You have made choices that I can't understand the reason for, but I can't convince myself to see you as an evil person."

Cassie chuckled as she drunkenly listened to Nephis's speech. She didn't know where she was going with this but couldn't care less right now.

"Did Sunny tell you that? I bet he did. He's always there to solve other people's issues. The Soul Devouring Tree, our second nightmare, Antarctica… dammit, we wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for him. Would any of us have made it out of the third nightmare without him? No, I think we both know that it would have been our demise."

Cassie tried to hold back the sobbing. Without tears, it felt wrong and pathetic, like she was doing something without giving it her all. Like she was powerless once again. Without being able to meet Nephis's eyes for more reasons than her blindness, she continued. Although she wished for nothing but to put an end to the suffering.

"And now? Now he's the one who needs our help, and we can't do anything. Once again, I'm not able to help him. Be the friend that he deserves. I hurt him more than anything else in the world. You don't understand, Neph, the decision I made and the weight it carried. No one can."

Nephis didn't know how to answer her. She felt like being torn apart. She always knew that Cassie had no bad intentions, but her actions didn't reflect that. But she also didn't know the full extent of the burden that Cassie carried with her.

"You and I, we both know that he hates me. At least he would if he still had his memories. You think it was easy for me to sacrifice the man I loved for the sake of a better future? Not just for me or humanity, but you and him too. I have had enough of this. The Sin of Solace is right. I'm a useless cripple who can't help anyone. All I ever did was save people, but for what? So that everyone hates me in the end? GREAT, FANTASTIC, I can't believe I was stupid enough to think I could make a difference."

Cassie felt the grip around her shoulders tighten. The room became hotter than usual, and in an instant, some of the debris caught fire. Although Cassie herself was left unharmed, she wasn't sure for how long.

"You listen to me right now. I want you to answer me honestly, Cassie…."

Nephis didn't want to ask the question the Sin of Solace had left with her. But she had to know. It would be the make-or-break point for their relationship, after all. If she could trust Cassie was no longer a given. The Sin of Solace had planted a seed in her mind, and if it bloomed, she wasn't sure if Cassie would survive what would come after.

The blind seer gave her a reluctant nod. Cassie wasn't nervous anymore; she didn't care any longer if Nephis would forsake her. After all, she had given up on trying to achieve her goals. In her eyes, it wasn't worth it any longer.

"Did you… did you hope that I would… die in the Dream Realm so you could be with… with Sunny?"

The question was barely audible over the sizzling flames she uttered between sobs. She was scared of the answer. And even more scared as she couldn't make out a change in Cassie's facial features. Nephis was not a master by any means when it came to reading those, but after all those years, she expected to at least be able to conclude something. To know the answer before Cassie had to say it.

In the end, she was not spared from getting the answer to her question from her friend she had cared for and loved as a member of her own family.

"Such a vile thought might have crossed my mind. Are you happy now? Can you kill me now? I sure hope so; at least that would mean I don't have to be here for the end."

Nephis collapsed right then and there. A panic attack she had not dealt with very often, if ever. She had seen others going through it, but experiencing it herself was on a whole new level. Her chest tightened, and her head began to spin; standing up seemed impossible at that moment.

And it was probably for the better. She knew if she could move right now, Cassie would not be safe from her no matter where she went. The golden-haired girl did nothing like that, though. Cassie just dropped next to her, waiting for her fate.

She had no intentions of helping Neph or fleeing. After all, she had no will to live any longer.

'I guess that's how Sunny felt after losing his fate. I'm truly a piece of shit.'

Nephis slowly came back to her senses. She had to think of more than just one person now. After all, her mental state and the level of stress she went through could very well threaten the life of her unborn child.

So she pulled herself together and stood up, her legs still trying to betray her.

Tears continued to fall from her face like a waterfall. In the next moment, she summoned a sword. The very same sword she had sworn to protect Cassie with.

With the Dreamblade tightly gripped, she took a step towards her. It took everything in her not to burn Cassie to a crisp right then and there.

"Why? Why would you even think of something like that? What have I done to you to deserve this? Was I such a bad friend? I have done nothing but protect you and care for you. YOU WERE LIKE A SISTER TO ME!"

Once again, Nephis's words collided with deaf ears.

"SPEAK! YOU ARE BLIND, NOT DEAF!"

She screamed at Cassie with all her might. The flames fed on her anger, burning even more intensely. The Ivory Tower could not withstand her rage as the floor around them began to liquefy on the surface.

For once, Cassie's eyes met hers directly.

"I'm sure we both know what love can do to a person. Of course, I hoped to be with Sunny instead of you at one point. It's like you said, 'we can't control how we feel'—weren't those your words? It would have ripped me apart seeing you die. The line on your sleeping pod falling for one last time. But at the same time, I knew what it would mean. It would mean that Sunny and I could be together. I know he hated me, but I still loved him. I still loved you."

Nephis listened to her while barely keeping herself standing. Today marked the day when Changing Star was at her weakest. The blade lunged in Cassie's direction with deadly intent spilling out from the steel.

In the next moment, it collided with the wall right next to Cassie's face. A thin cut spread from right under her eye to the side of her head. Golden strings fell to the ground, mixing with the tears and blood in return.

"I won't stain the Soul of my baby with the burden of your death. You can seek solace in those visions of yours. Maybe they tell you where to find a place to rot. Try the underworld I have been to. The place suits someone like you well."

Without waiting for an answer, Nephis leaped to the window and dived down into the seemingly endless depths below the Ivory Tower. She had better things to do than waste her time with Cassie, after all.

Prepare for a battle.

Cassie was left with wide eyes; she couldn't believe her ears, but those had never betrayed her after losing her sight. So she had no way to deny Nephis's claim.

"She is… pregnant?"